It was the end of another long day. Arizona tightened the grip on her bag as she walked the busy streets of Seattle. She let her feet guide the way, not really sure exactly where they would take her. She hoped it would be to Joe's seeing as she could desperately use a drink right about now. In the back of her mind though, she knew where she really wanted to go. Arizona thought about stopping, of turning around and going back to the hospital. Maybe she could hide out there for a little while longer, let herself get caught up in patients and consults and charts. As much as she wanted to, needed to even, Arizona knew that would only make things worse. Despite the pain caused by her prosthetic, Arizona sped up; the faster she walked, the less likely she would chicken out.
As Arizona walked, her mind was free to wander. She thought about her life and the downward spiral it had taken since the plane crash. She thought about losing her leg and about the stress of partly owning the hospital. She thought about losing Lexie and Mark. She thought about the way Lauren looked at her, like she was beautiful, not someone who needed fixing. She thought about sleeping with Murphy just because she couldn't stand being alone. God how much could one person screw up before it was too late. Right now Arizona felt as if she could fill the Pacific Ocean with all the mistakes she had made.
Delving into the past made Arizona's head spin. A dizzying feeling started to overwhelm her, making her vision blurry. She sat down on a bench before she ended up on the ground. She didn't notice at first, but this was their bench. The one that overlooked the entire city. Arizona couldn't count the number of times she and Callie had come here to talk, laugh and just be. It used to be peaceful here, but now it just made her sad. Arizona stood up and started walking again. There was no more avoiding it. She had to stop being such a coward and apologize to Callie. Her Calliope. With her dark, mysterious eyes and that breathtaking smile. Aside from their little girl, Callie was the only person who held Arizona's heart in the palm of her hand. The woman broke though all the walls Arizona had put up for herself with ease, just like the bones she broke every single day.
Arizona walked with a renewed vigor. She wanted her life back. She wanted her family back. She wanted to spend the rest of her life waking up in Calliope's arms. She wanted to watch her little girl become the beautiful, intelligent, loving woman they both knew she would be. From the moment Arizona first saw their daughter, she knew she was a goner. Sofia was the spitting image of Callie and, just like her mommy, had Arizona wrapped around her little finger. If there was one person Arizona missed more than Callie, it was their darling Sofia. She had really messed up, but there was no way Arizona would let anything ruin the best thing that had ever happened to her. She never thought she would settle down, but now Callie and Sofia were her life. Without them, she had nothing, was nothing.
Before Arizona knew it, she was standing outside the familiar blue door of the home she and Callie once shared. The feeling was bittersweet. She found herself wishing her walk had taken just a little bit longer. She took a deep breath; all she had to do was talk. Once she told Callie how she felt, everything would be okay. Arizona raised her hand to the door and hesitated. What if Callie didn't want to see her? What if someone else was there? Oh God this was sure to be a disaster. Arizona quickly forced herself to push the negative thoughts out of her head and knocked on the door, softly at first and then louder. She could hear Callie shuffling through the apartment, making her way towards the door. The click of the lock shortly followed and finally the door opened.
The look on Callie's face was nothing short of shocked. Arizona tried using this opportunity to say something, anything to get her foot in the door, but she choked on her words. They stared at each other for what seemed like hours, but could have been minutes for all she knew, until finally Callie broke the silence.
"Arizona. What... What are you doing here?"
"Calliope. I... I just.." but her mind was blank.
"Just don't, okay Arizona. You should just leave." Callie started to close the door, but Arizona stopped her. There was no way she would get another door slammed in her face.
"No Callie. I won't let you slam this door in my face again. Please.. Please just listen to what I have to say." The pleading in her voice was obvious, but Arizona couldn't have cared less.
"Arizona.." Callie started
"No Callie. No." Arizona interrupted knowing this would be the only chance she got to explain. "Look Callie I'm sorry, so terribly sorry." She hesitated. "No actually I'm not, because I know that no matter how many times I apologize it will never come close to how I really feel. I know I messed up. I messed up big time. I spend everyday wishing I could take it all back. But Callie, it was a mistake. I made a mistake."
"You call sleeping with two different women a mistake. I don't think so Arizona." She started to close the door and again Arizona stopped her.
"Callie.. Please." That was all she could get out before tears began to stream down her face. "I.. I was angry. Ever since the crash it's felt as if my whole life has been spinning out of control while all I can do is watch. I was angry because my best friend had just died. Angry because Karev was going to leave. Angry because you made me a promise and I woke up without a leg. Angry because even after I started getting better, I was still a patient to you."
"Arizona.."
"No Callie. I said I was angry, meaning I'm not anymore. I couldn't accept it then, but I know you were doing the only thing you could do. None of this is your fault. If anything, it's mine. I know I have done nothing but make your life a living hell and I understand if you never want to be in the same room with me again. But I also want you to know that I still love you and I will do whatever it takes to get you and Sofia back into my life. I have felt so lost without you, because you are my life Calliope, you and Sofia. You always have been. So please. Please. I'm begging you. Please forgive me."
Arizona was met with nothing but silence. Callie's face was unreadable, but God even when she looked like a mess she was beautiful. Arizona couldn't help but stare at Callie, seeing as this might be the last time she would ever get to look at her with such abandon. Her eyes traveled from Callie's long, toned legs, up her gorgeous body and finally to her beautiful face. Arizona's heart rate sped up as her eyes remained fixated on the full, luscious lips in front of her. Right now she wanted nothing more than to kiss them. Not that it would fix anything, but it would give Arizona one last memory she could hang on to. It took all the courage she could muster, but Arizona finally closed the space between them, pressing her lips against Callie's. Before Callie could reject her, Arizona pulled away.
"Sorry. I just.. I had to do that. At least one more time. I'm sorry I came here and put you in this position." Arizona turned around to leave, but Callie's voice stopped her.
"Arizona wait." She turned back around to face Callie, leaving the two women standing face to face once more.
"I'm sorry too. I mean.. I'm sorry that everything happened like it did, that things got so bad between us." Tears began to fill Callie's dark, brown eyes as she spoke, making her somehow even more beautiful. "I want to forgive to you. I really do. It's just going to take time. But Arizona.. I still love you too. And.. And I.. I just miss you so much."
Callie could no longer contain the tears that were now streaming down her face. It was painful for Arizona to see her like that, knowing that she was the cause. Instinct kicked in; Arizona moved closer to Callie and used the pads of her thumbs to wipe the tears from her face. With their faces almost touching now, it was nearly impossible for Arizona to keep herself in check. Both women froze and stared at each other for half a second before Callie's lips came crashing into Arizona's. Tongues battled for dominance and teeth clanged together as they both desperately tried to kiss away all of the pain that had been building up inside of each of them. It wasn't until they were both gasping for air that their lips parted.
"That was..." Arizona started between ragged breaths, but once again she was left speechless.
"Yeah. It was uhh.." Callie tried to finish, but they were interrupted by the sound of little feet coming down the hall. They both turned to see Sofia standing there, eyes half closed, with her favorite stuffed animal hanging by her side.
"Mommy.."
"Hey baby girl. What are you doing up?" Callie turned and walked towards Sofia, but Arizona remained frozen in the doorway.
"Mommy can I sleep with you?" Sofia's words were barely intelligible as she tried to stifle a yawn.
"Of course you can baby." As Callie moved to pick up their little girl, Arizona came right into Sofia's sight.
"Mama?"
"Hey baby girl." Sofia struggled out of Callie's hold and ran to Arizona. "I've missed you so much." She managed to lean over and pick up their little girl without falling and walked into the living room where Callie was still standing.
"Mama can you sleep with me too? You're the best monster fighter."
"Aww baby.. I don't.." But Callie cut her off.
"Of course she can baby girl. Mama and I will be on either side of you, so none of the monsters can get you." Callie looked at Arizona, hoping what she said to Sofia would be enough for Arizona to consider coming back home.
"Really?" Sofia looked at one parent and then the other.
"Really." Arizona cut in. "So why don't you get into bed and me and Mommy will be right behind you." Once Sofia was gone, Arizona turned to Callie.
"Does this mean that you forgive me?" Arizona said with tears that were threatening to spill over her eyes for the second time that night.
"It means.." Callie grabbed both of her hands. "It means that I love you and I can't imagine a life without you and I will do whatever it takes to fix this mess as long as you agree to meet me halfway." Callie leaned in and kissed Arizona once more, but this time much softer and less hurried.
"I love you too." Only a few tears fell this time before Callie stopped them.
"Hey, hey. No more tears okay?"
"Okay." Callie took her hand and lead them back to their bedroom.
Arizona woke up the next morning slightly confused. She was at home in her bed, something that had not happened in quite some time. A warm body was pressed up against her side and fingers were interlocked with hers. This had to be some kind of dream. Then she remembered the previous night's events, the strides she and Callie had taken towards mending their relationship. Arizona turned to see Callie and Sofia both still fast asleep, each clutching to a part of her body. She couldn't contain the smile that crept across her face at the sight of her girls. Her girls. She would never grow tired of saying that. It was stupid to think that she could have ever lived without either of them. She was just so happy to have her family back together. There was still work that she and Callie needed to do, but as far as Arizona was concerned, they had already jumped over the biggest hurdle. Now it would just take time for everything else to fall back into place.