Not Enough
Chapter 1 - Just A Thought
By: KaKaVegeGurl
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Alas, another fanfic!
It's about time KaKaVegeGurl did some updating, I bet you all have been growing restless, well don't worry, there will be more to come, and I hope that I can build up some inspiration and begin writing to many of my other fanfics that need some updating. sweat drop Please come in, the ac's on high, so you don't have to worry too much, and grab yourself a cup of yaoi, they're on the counter over there, then sit down, and enjoy the story!
KaKaVegeGurl
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D He seemed alone to me. When he was laughing. When he was talking to his friends. Even when he said he was happy. I think he was sad. I think he was alone. As much as I loved him, I could never get up the courage to talk to him. To show him how much I cared. I could have been wrong about it. But I felt I was right. I still do. More eyes have been on him over time, as he grew up; and changed. Into the most beautiful flower I had ever seen. Into the greatest thing. Whenever he thought he was alone. He wasn't. I was always there. I was there when he fought Quirrel. I was there when he heard the voices. I was there when he fought Tom Riddle. I was there when he found out Sirius Black was his Godfather. And when he saw Lupin turn into a Werewolf, when he went back in time, when he was in the Prefect's bathroom, when he dove underwater and saved Weasley, when he saw he-who-must-not-be-named arise once more, when Diggory died, when he thought he was expelled, when he used Umbridge's magic quill, I was there, I was even there when he stayed with Black for those few weeks. And when he taught Longbottom the Patronus Charm, when he fought my father, and most of all... I'm here with him now. I'll always be with him. I watched him grow, and I'm so proud of him. But for a reason known only to me, I am also scared. Potter can't handle as much as some think he can. He's alone in his heart. No one to love, no one to care for. And to him... To live for. He thinks he has no one. But as sad as that may sound... The one he could care for... Isn't brave enough to tell the truth... D
D But I am coward enough to lie. D
"... bloody well thinks he's right. Rudy Ravenclaws."
"Put a sock in it Parkinson, or I'll do it for you."
A few Slytherin's chuckled. Pansy, however, looked to be both astonished and outraged.
Draco rolled his eyes and sat down in a separate compartment, his head throbbing in ache. He was just about to close the door when both Crabbe and Goyle noticed him.
"Malfoy." They both grunted and climbed in to join him. Taking up and entire side on their own.
Pansy smiled and followed suit, sitting beside Draco and Blaise did the same as well.
D Unfortunately I got my attention from idiots. Both Crabbe and Goyle were too bone-headed to understand my problem. Even if I told them. Parkinson... She may not have been stupid... But she would tell anyone who was willing to listen. And as for Blaise... He'd most likely use it against me. I had to be careful of everything I said around those two. This was mine and Potter's last year at Hogwarts and my father was still in Azkaban. I must admit... I was grateful for that bit of comfort. Being home without him there was one of the best things that had ever happened to me, and it was all thanks to Potter... My mind always wondered... Without Potter around I'd probably be nothing. I'd be... Dust in the wind. A drop of mud in an endless ocean. Potter was my everything. How could I let him stray this far away from me? My own self-centeredness would be my downfall. I had chased him away, pushed him away. I didn't even deserve his hate. If I hadn't been such a rude git... Maybe I'd actually have a chance. I know I could make him happy. I could make him feel good. I could satisfy his every need. If only I hadn't been such an ass. Maybe he would've been happy. D
D Maybe I would've been happy. D
"Harry's taking medical classes with Madam Pomfrey this year, aren't you, Harry?"
"Give him a chance to talk, Hermione."
"I think it's great."
"So do I, Luna, Harry's going to like it. And besides, he'll be taking the class with another person, so it won't be just him and Madam Pomfrey there. So at least he'll have some help."
D Would he ever know how much I thought of him? I'd never give myself the chance to tell him. No matter how badly I wanted to. What was worse? I had become the thing he hated most. A Deatheater... Not in the mind... But the marking on my wrist would tell Harry all he needed to know. I feared the way he would react. And that's why I'm here now. He may have had friends... But I know he needed more. He needed a touch. And I was the only one to give it to him. Everytime I heard him call me 'Malfoy'... It made me realize just how much he must've hated me. He spat at my name as much as I did. Now would be my only chance to make things right. Would he forgive me? I know could make him happy. D
D I know in my heart that I could. If only I had told him sooner. Maybe he wouldn't be in the shape he was now. Only I know the true state he's in. Not like he'd want to tell anyone else. But I really wondered if Granger had figured it out yet. I was giving her too much credit. I was/am the only one who knows about Harry's most deepest, darkest secret. I found out on an accident. I never meant to listen in, or spy on him. As much as I had done that already, how could I have missed this? I found out in my fourth year. I had taken a break from class and went to relieve myself in the bathroom. I was already finished and had my pants zipped back up for only a second when the door to the boy's bathroom opened and he stepped in. D
Draco peeked through the crack in his door, his eyes widened at what he saw.
Harry sat side view; tears streamed down his cheeks.
D I didn't know what to do. I was so scared. He was sitting there; crying, no less than six feet away, I felt like I shouldn't have been there. D
"God..." Harry ran his hand under his glasses to wipe away his tears.
D He was crying at first, and then he was sobbing. I knew I'd get in trouble for being out of class for so long; but I didn't care. I felt so guilty just watching him... And then I saw it... Something that would change my life forever... His robe had shifted up a bit to expose most of his arms... There they were; several long gashes in the skin, some faded, and some looked fresh. He had fallen victim to cutting. My heart skipped a beat. I didn't know what made him cry that day; I probably never would. But after that, it seemed so obvious that he was a cutter; he wore long sleeves. After that day I finally came to the lasting conclusion... I could make him happy. D
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Began and over just like that? Please wait for more people, the next chapter will be comming out soon! I hope you enjoyed! Please review!
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