"Bonding Stinks"
Rated T for rude toilet humor
Disclaimer: I do not own Total Drama, The Ridonculous Race or any of this characters. Total Drama, The Ridonculous Race, and its characters are owned by Fresh TV, Jennifer Pertsch and Tom McGillis. Since I was inspired by a scene from the show "Two and a Half Men", I'd figured I do a little Dwayne and Junior one-shot (not incest slash) just to entertain all of you.
P.S.: Before I start with this fic, I want to say that my heart and love goes out to the people in Paris, who had recently gone through a horrible tragedy. To those 120 people who lost their lives, you definitely didn't deserve this. I don't think anyone would deserve it at all. I feel like there are real heartless people in the world who would take a life for their own amusement. It makes me sick. I hope that the families and the rest of the people affected of the tragedy stand strong. Make sure you love everyone who's part of this dark hour recently. My heart goes out to you all, deep down. Anyway, I hope this fic will help cheer you up and bring a smile to your faces. Enjoy.
It was definitely a long plane ride to Dubai. The competition was definitely fierce and so far, Dwayne and his son, Dwayne Jr, needed to step up their game in hopes of not getting eliminated next. However, the plane ride quickly grew boring for Junior, who did nothing but lay his head on his own shoulder, hoping to fall asleep fast.
Suddenly, he caught his eye on Dwayne, who was reading a sports magazine just for fun. There was no way Dwayne could ever go a day without seeing something sports-related. This finally cured Junior's brief boredom.
"When can I read, dad?" Junior asked him.
"When I'm done, son." Dwayne replied. "Relax and take in the scenery."
After looking around the plane for a few seconds, Junior looked to his dad again.
"Okay, now what?" He shrugged.
"I don't know," Dwayne shrugged as well. "Let's just enjoy each other's company."
"All right." Junior nodded.
The only thing Junior could do was just stare at the window and look at the skies in hope to find fun in all of this. However, like the long-ass plane ride he took, Junior felt bored. Seeing his dad with the magazine again, Junior spoke up.
"Okay, now what?" Junior shrugged.
"Oh, come on, son." Dwayne groaned. "This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to get to know each other as more than father and son."
"What else are we, dad?" Junior shrugged again.
"We're just two men on the open skies, feeling free and unencumbered!" His father declared.
"Oh..." Junior nodded. "What's unencumbered?"
"No restraints. We can do whatever we want, son." Dwayne said with a smile. "I mean, your mother ain't around."
"Okay." His son nodded again. "Can I read your magazine?"
"Right after I'm done, son. Pick something else." Dwayne replied.
Once again, Junior felt defeated. What could he do in a plane ride like this? Staring at the window was out of the question, and so was taking a nap. So what was Junior gonna do in a time like this.
It was very simple, Junior decided to stretch out his seat, take in a squeeze and...
...
...
...
*PBBBBBBT!*
Junior farted loudly.
"Ohhhh, son!" Dwayne groaned as he laughed a bit.
Junior couldn't help but start laughing as well. At least by farting next to him, it finally broke the concentration Dwayne had from reading Sports Illustrated.
"Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho, well, very funny!" Dwayne scoffed. "You want to go toot for toot, then? Well, check this out, son! You ain't seen nothing yet!"
In retaliation, Dwayne let out a minor fart blast.
"Ohhhh, man!" Junior chuckled, holding his nose a little bit.
"Mm-hmm, that is a bran muffin and a full glass of mochaccino, my son!" Dwayne smirked.
"Oh, yeah?" said Junior, who raised his eyebrow. "Well, this is two chili dogs, tater tots and a chocolate ice cream bar!"
Suddenly, Junior let out this fart:
*PBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBT!*
That kind of fart made Dwayne laugh so hard, he was this close to having his pants wet on occasion.
"How about that?" Junior smirked at his dad's face.
"Impressive, but you ain't seen the last of what I'm gonna give to you." Dwayne smirked. "This is an antidepressant and stewed prunes!"
With a big huge squeeze coming from Dwayne, he clinched in this sound:
*PBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBT! PBBBBB-BBBBBBBBBB-BBBBBBBBBT!*
He farted so loud, it sent Junior to cover his nose and mouth altogether in safety. But as Dwayne wanted to celebrate...
...
...
...he had a horrified look on his face, as if something was wrong.
He farted so loud inside the plane, it took him only several seconds to realize something wet and sour inside his underwear. It was clear that Dwayne had accidentally crapped himself, only to make Junior not just clench his nose in fear, but embarrass him in public. He didn't want to look down there and as much as he resisted, he had no choice but to look.
But that wasn't the problem. As Dwayne looked up, he saw someone standing beside him feeling horrified and disgusted at what he/she just saw. Dwayne had a very surprised look when he looked at the person he was staring:
And that was Kelly.
"Oh, um... it's not what you exactly think!" Dwayne lied to her. "We were... just doing imitations of a helicopter sputtering out of control, that's all!"
"Um, yeah." Kelly said, somehow 'believing' his story. "Listen, could you do me a favor and stay away from me? I'd like that."
With Dwayne sinking into his chair in total shame, the gorgeous trophy mom shouted over to her daughter.
"Come with me, Taylor! We're going over to sit with the Rockers instead!"
"It's about time too!" Taylor shouted back off-screen.
So after the mother and daughter team left, Dwayne (who was still in his newly-crapped pants) stared down to Junior, who was still clenching his nose because of the stink. With a nervous gulp, he spoke out.
"Hey Son... um, how long do we get to Dubai?" Dwayne gulped.
"Only ten minutes." Junior replied.
"Would you mind getting your old dad some new underwear...?" He shivered.
"No problem, dad..." Junior groaned, turning the other cheek away from Dwayne.
So much for bonding time. It really stunk.
Literally.
Poor Dwayne. That's why you should never have fart contests at all. It's a bit unattractive and it stinks. (Obviously because there's a good choice someone's gonna crap themselves.)
Anyway, feedbacks are welcome! Until next time, this is UltimateWarriorFan4Ever signing off for now. And just remember:
#PrayForParis