Shaky hands found each other under the table while glassy eyes laid on a paper plate. Upon it, burnt toast-lightly buttered. The air was painfully thick with unsaid words, silence falling upon the trio like a heavy blanket. Comfortable, and yet utterly suffocating. Cold and quiet, he wished for more. The unspoken expectation to keep his tired eyes trained upon that familiar and nonjudgmental paper plate was clear as day. Except to Jon, of course.
He looked up.
Mark was seated directly in front of him.
Jon's friend was bored. Painfully so, if he had to guess. Jon had to wonder if his friend even wanted to be here. Maybe he wasn't, not really. His gaze was unfocused and unknowing, seemingly not even noticing the man looking at him. Studying him. He recognized that Mark and him were never close, but he could have sworn they'd never been this far either. His inherent disinterest stirred something inside of Jon. Something cold and wrong. Resentment he'd never meant to foster wormed its way into his heart. Mark fit in better than he ever did, and yet always seemed bored.
Cold realization hit Jon like ice. Maybe he only looked at Jon that way.
He turns away.
Eduardo. His best friend, who'd apparently become fascinated with his bowl of cereal- he wasn't even bothering to glance upward between spoonfuls. He was frowning, angry and on edge. And Jon understood why. He wasn't stupid. Well, maybe he was... Okay, fine, he knew he was. But not so stupid he couldn't understand something so simple. Eduardo didn't like him. Not much, anyway. It was a simple truth. A painful and bitter one. However, it was one he didn't accept laying down. He was an important part of the group, even if he couldn't quite keep up. Even if they didn't quite like him. They were friends, they were a trio. That's enough. Isn't it?
Jon lowers his head.
Nails dig into clasped hands as he returns his eyes to their rightful place. He keeps his mouth shut. He has nothing worth saying. The blanket envelops him.
Bloody fingers itch for a bottle- it's 5:00 somewhere.