A/N: I don't know. Sometimes I write random things.
Summary: This is Edward Elric's view on this whole "I-hate-Roy-beyond-what-you-can-imagine-yet-I-have-wet-hot-and-steamy-dreams-about-him". [RoyEd]
Word count: 508
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His steamy dreams
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Ed hates Roy.
Ed hates Roy.
Roy must hate Ed, because otherwise Ed thinks he's more of a jerk if he acts like that to people he doesn't hate.
Ed hates Roy for many reasons. For insulting him, mainly making jokes about his height, jokes about being a dog of the military though he is one himself and the list goes on. Those are, according to Ed, reasonable, legitimate reasons for not liking someone, and especially those with a smug attitude. Those are even more hateable.
There is, however, another reason Ed hates Roy. That reason is a simple fact; Edward Elric is sexually attracted to Roy Mustang. This royally pisses him off, as he does not want to be attracted to Roy Mustang at all. Ed doesn't even find him handsome and also finds his personality to be quite nasty and repelling. See? Ed does not find Roy Mustang to be attractive. His body betrays him in this matter however so that makes him rather mad.
Very mad. So mad in fact that he in this very moment has locked himself up in his and his brother's shared hotel room. Al is somewhere else as he claims: "Ed's tiny cloud of impenetrable gloom" scares him a bit and that he's scared that Ed will eat him. Ed grew even more angry with that statement as he wasn't really paying attention and only heard the word 'tiny' being spoken towards him.
Ed doesn't know where Al went. If he did, he would be glad he wasn't there with him. Hawkeye and Winry have proven to match each other like Yin and Yang, and, in Alphonse Elric's presence, are currently discussing bras.
Ed slung himself over the bead and buries his face in the pillow. It's so soft and inviting. But he doesn't want to sleep. He has promised himself never to sleep again after the wet dream about a taller, military dog jerk last night. Ed never wants to see those things again.
Of course that is a lie, but he will never ever never admit such. Ed will recognize and punish his unconsciousness for its high treason against him.
It had scared Ed a little, seeing his own cock in a familiar man's mouth.
Ed had told himself that such dreams scarred him because a) he was an unsoiled virgin and such dirty acts were yet scary and foreign to him, b) it was Roy Mustang, c) it was another man, d) it was Roy Mustang, e) it was Roy Mustang and finally f) it was Roy Mustang. Roy Mustang! Yes, it definitely scared and scarred him gravely. What the fuck would Ed do if Roy were ever to acquire knowledge of the dreams (yes, dreams, plural, as in, many of those dreams). Even though it was highly unlikely, Ed would still worry.
This was Edward Elric's view on this whole "I-hate-Roy-yet-I-have-wet-hot-and-steamy-dreams-about-him".
One would wonder, what was Roy Mustang's own opinion on this? He was, after all, also having wet dreams about his object of dislike, Ed.
A/N: Short, without meaning, but yeah, let's just say my head is on a flying trip right now. Review! :D