Just fishing

I'm lost in her there holding that pick rod and reel. She's doing almost everything but sitting still. She's talking about her ballet shoes, training wheels and her kittens. She thinks we're just fishing. I say daddy loves you baby one more time. She says I know I think I've got a bite. All this laughing, crying, dying here inside is what I call living. She thinks we are just fishing.

Christopher sat on the river bank with his daughter Rory. He smiled at the sight of her holding her pale pink fishing pole he had picked out for her for her fifth birthday. He put his hands over top of her small ones, "Ok Rory I'm going to put the worm on the hook for you."

The five year old started to pout when he took the rod away from her, "I want to do it daddy."

Chris laughed softly he could tell that she had Lorelai's stubborn streak. He kissed his daughter's forehead and smiled, "How about as soon as I put the worm on I'll let you throw your line out by yourself k?"

Rory nodded satisfied. Christopher put the worm on both his and Rory's hooks quickly. He then handed his daughter back her rod, "Alright Jelly bean you ready to learn how to cast?"

Rory giggled and nodded her head. Chris helped his daughter get her line in the water and then cast his own line in. Five minutes later Rory asked, "What's next daddy?"

Chris ruffled his daughter's hair, "Now we wait. When you feel a tug on your line let me know and I'll help you reel it in. So why don't you sit down next to me and tell me what you've been up to. It's been a long time since I saw you last. Last time I saw you… you were just three."

Rory nodded and started talking excitedly, "Daddy I know how to read now. I can write my name! Grandma wants me to take ballet lessons. I don't like the shoes though daddy they hurt my feet. Mommy is teaching me how to ride a bike without training wheels. Miss Patty's cat had kittens. They are pretty orange and white."

After about an hour Rory finally sat down beside her dad. The sun and fresh air was beginning to tire her out. Christopher rubbed her back as she rested her head against his shoulder, "Daddy loves you sweetie."

Rory sleepily answered, "I know."

Suddenly Rory felt a slight tug on her line, "Daddy I think a got a bite. Can you help me?"

Chris nodded and helped her bring in the line. Sure enough on the line was a large fish. Chris gave her a high five, "Let's throw this big guy back k kiddo."

After awhile Christopher sighed as he realized that Rory had fallen asleep against his shoulder. He kissed her hair and reeled in his line. He hadn't realized he had missed so much of his daughter's life. Rory was growing into an amazing kid and he regretted that he had missed her first steps, her first word, hell he hadn't even been there the day that she was born.

She thinks we are just fishing by the riverside throwing back what we could fry. Drowning worms and killing time nothing too ambitious. She isn't even thinking about what is really going on right now. I grantee this memory is a big one. She thinks we are just fishing. She's already pretty like her momma is. Going to drive the boys all crazy give her daddy fits. I better do this every chance I get. Time is ticking. She thinks we are just fishing. We aren't only fishing.

Once Rory woke up from her nap Chris gave her shoulder a squeeze, "Hey kiddo I think we should start driving back. It's getting late. Rory looked at her dad with sad eyes, "Daddy I want to stay here with you."

Christopher sighed and put his arms around his daughter wiping away a tear that had escaped her eyes, "Listen Rory I love you so much. You mom loves you too though and it wouldn't be right for me to keep you away from her. I promise we can go fishing as often as you want sweetheart. You have my cell phone number right kiddo?"

Rory nodded and hugged her dad. The whole drive back to Stars Hollow Rory snuggled into her dad's chest. The two of them didn't talk Chris just kept a comforting hand on her arm while driving. When they reached Lorelai's house Chris helped his daughter out of the car and gave her a long hug, "Goodnight kiddo. I love you."

Lorelai was standing on the front porch watching the two of them. She made her way over and spoke quietly, "Rory go upstairs and get ready for bed. I'll be up to tuck you in shortly."

Once Rory was out of bed Lorelai spoke to Chris, "So what did she think of fishing?"

Christopher smiled, "I think she liked it. It got me thinking though. I've missed so much of her life Lore. She's growing up so fast. Every part of her shows that she's your daughter. I don't want to wake up one day and hear she's getting married and find out I haven't been there her whole life. I was wondering if I could see her maybe every weekend rather than just once a week."

Lorelai frowned, "This isn't just about the fishing trip is it? Chris you know I want you to be a part of Rory's life too but you've got to get yourself together. She needs her dad I know she does. I just want you to be a constant in her life. For right now I think just once in a while is best until I know that you can be the stable figure in her life that she needs. You don't have to be a stranger though. I kind of like having you around more often."

Christopher smiled sadly and Lorelai could tell it was forced. She gave him a warm hug, "You know if you want you can come and say goodnight to her. I think she'd like that."