[[Author's notes:

So I've got, like, three different fics in progress and none of them are cooperating. Also, I have to fend off the Henriet (haha, I just made that up, although for a moment I was thinking Julery. Hahaha. I crack myself up when it's almost two in the morning. ANYWAY.) plotbunnies. Heh. But! This one I got done, and it's another giftfic, for the lovely JerseyBelle, for the prompt: Spencer quietly opened the bedroom door...'

Enjoy. :D H&Ks, Elske.]]

Spencer quietly opened the bedroom door…very, very quietly.

It had come to the point where there was only one possible route left in his (so-far unsuccessful) Seduce The Pants off of Lassipants Plan. And that seemed to be "crawl naked in bed with the man and prove to him that you're interested in sexytimes".

That night he'd had just enough to drink to make it seem like a Good Idea. Jules had had just enough to drink to giggle when he'd outlined his Plan and hand over her copy of Lassy's spare key. And – he'd hoped – Lassy himself had had enough to drink to be properly sleeping and not ready to shoot the Intruder.

He's glad he left his shoes (and pants and shirt, for that matter) near the front door of Lassy's condo, because that way he can move more stealthily. His eyes have just adjusted to the dark, and yes, there's Lassy: curled up in the fetal position, clutching a pillow to his chest, breathing so deeply that he's almost – but not quite – snoring.

Perfect.

Shawn Spencer makes his way slowly towards Lassy's enormous bed – just what did anyone need with a bed that size, he wonders, before remembering yeah, Lassiter was married and from what he knew of the former Mrs Lassiter, she seemed the type to enjoy luxury. And ew, thinking of Lassiter's ex is NOT conducive to the Seduce The Pants off of Lassipants Plan.

He peels back the duvet, then – in one quick motion – slides into bed next to Lassy, pulls the blanket up to cover both of them. He inches closer to the other man's body warmth, and then is shocked to notice that apparently the pants are already off of Lassipants, because it seems the other man's sleeping in the altogether. And that's so erotic that the lack of Pants to Seduce Off has suddenly distracted him from the other components of the Plan.

"Mmm?" Lassy murmurs. "Oh, am I having that dream again?" His voice is sleep-blurred, but happy.

Shawn dares to edge closer, close enough to fling an arm across Lassy's chest. "What dream is that?"

"The one where Shawn Spencer appears in my bed to screw me senseless."

This is NOT at all what Shawn was expecting. "I didn't think you cared, Lassydear."

"You're such a tease, been flirting with me for years, how do you expect me not to dream about you? Specially since no one else wants me." Lassy's sleepy voice has grown heartbreakingly sad, and Shawn's torn between pity and the promise of this Plan actually working.

"What if it wasn't a dream, Lassy?"

"Probably have to shoot you for breaking and entering, if you were really here."

"Mmm." Shawn cuddles closer. "You couldn't do that, I've got a key."

"How did you?"

"Jules gave it to me." He tilts his head, kisses the back of Lassy's neck, is gratified to hear the other man make a small happy noise.

"Maybe I won't have to shoot you."

"Maybe we should discuss the matter of my being shot in the morning?" Shawn shifts even closer, flush with Lassy's back, kisses him just behind his ear.

"Maybe if you keep on like that I won't have to shoot you."

"I'm afraid I haven't the accoutrements" – and he pronounces that with an exaggeratedly poor French accent – "to screw you senseless, Lassy. Maybe next time. But…" and he trails his fingers through Lassy's lovely chest-hair, down his stomach, all the way to his cock. "Would this be a fitting substitute?"

"Sweet Justice, yes."

(Shawn Spencer loves it when – among other things - a plan comes together.)