That Christmas And Now

Disclaimer: I dont own Fringe or the well known Christmas media mentioned in this story

Spoilers: Nothing major just some references to episodes 3-6.

"That's an unusual request, Peter," Olivia told him sliding the old photograph back in his direction. "Unless, you intend on using it for an experiment to help with our cases, I don't think I can help you."

"Well knowing, Walter. He probably just might. But please help me out, Olivia. Astrid's already left town for Christmas and I never had to shop around for one of these...things myself. I thought your little FBI expertise can help me here."

Both Peter and Olivia seemed to share the same disgust and hatred toward Christmas shopping and pretty much every sense of commercialism that represented the holiday season. When she thought about the thing that Peter wanted Olivia to help him shop for, the thought finally occurred to her…

"Didn't Walter say he used to have a…"

"Exactly," said Peter.

"Interesting, this is actually very thoughtful of you. I never knew you had it in you…especially when it comes to Walter."

"Yeah…well, I only go for doing 'nice' for the relatives a few times a year. Though I haven't contacted any family in about 10 years, so this should be nice enough to make up for all of the years."

"And where's Walter at now?"

"I filled him up with plenty of eggnog, carried him to his favorite spot in the closet, and pushed the couch to block the door. We should be good without him for a few hours."

Having reluctantly agreed to the search, Olivia still found the thought of Peter giving Walter something so meaningful very…odd, given the difficult animosity she's been witness to between them. But suppose Peter was feeling bad about the difficulties he was having with his father. Suppose Peter was actually starting to feel sorry for him. Stranger things have already happened.

"So, Olivia," Peter asked. She became familiar with that tone in his voice before. It was one that always came when Peter wanted to get under her skin for the sake of knowing a little more about her that she would rather keep hidden. She was feeling a bit stiff as the two were walking through a strip mall.

"What do you normally do for Christmas?"

That was a surprising question, Olivia thought. But one that made sense.

"It's different every year," she said finally relaxing. "There's hasn't been any family or tradition in it in years."

"Okay well…what did you do last year?"

Olivia feared that was what he would ask. For a second, her mind told her that this was going to be really bad for her to bring it up. But another part of her wondered knew she no longer felt anything anymore whenever she thought of it. Peter would probably pry her for the answer much like her attitude on her birthday. She finally decided to let the answer come and whatever terrible feelings she would get from recalling it.

"Last year…I spent it with John and his family." She glanced at Peter to see how he would respond. He only responded by looking back at her, which a bit of shy awkwardness, perhaps regret for asking her. Olivia didn't want him to feel that way…not at all. So she was determined to show Peter it was nothing to feel bad or sorry about.

"He has a very big family, you know," she said confidently. "Nothing I've never experienced in my life. From the very moment I walked into the door of his parents' house with him, I felt completely out of place. It was terrible…or at least I was feeling very nervous and uncomfortable. John did everything to make me feel comfortable and would tell everyone what a great agent I was at work…but everyone was just staring at me…"

To this day, Olivia still felt the unusual glares she got from John Scott's relatives. It was considered abnormal for them to have someone spend Christmas at the house who was just a co-worker, and the fact that they were obviously partners in a field where being too close with your partners was looked down upon made Olivia's presence all the more uncomfortable. Every hand she shook at that house seemed to be sending her a message that she didn't belong there.

It became obvious after a few hours at the Scott residence that the uncomfortable feelings weren't going to go away no matter what John did for her. She lied to him, knowing it was far from her best abilities at lying, and told him that there were some files that were coming into the Bureau tonight that she didn't want to delay looking over. John tried to talk her into staying. But in a pathetic plea, Olivia begged for him to just let her go. She knew that not showing up at the dinner would made her seem even more pathetic in the eyes of John's family, but Olivia didn't think she could've handled having the same glares poking at her and John while they were eating.

As she walked out the door, she saw the eyes of John's mother staring back at her. Hers had been the coldest of all. John warned Olivia that his mother was hard to please. There was more to that glare that not only said that Olivia wasn't welcome in the house, it also wielded the sense of accusation that she was a 'threat'…a possible danger to her son.

Many months passed and Olivia came face to face with that cold glare again…with John's casket lying in between them. The return of that cold glare she saw at Christmas only solidified the woman's suspicions as if to say to Olivia that she knew she would 'hurt' John all along…

She shook the thoughts away hoping she hadn't kept Peter in suspense too long but he was attentively understanding of it.

"Anyway," she said. "What did you do last year?"

"You know, I really can't remember but I think that must have been because of my big hangover," he said. "I remember I was staying at this hotel that was really close to this church because those bells were killing me. I swear my head was going to explode. So I did the one thing I could think of…I opened the window to my room and scream 'shut the hell up' at the top of my lungs to nobody. I nearly fell out, which could've been worse given I was only wearing someone else's boxers at the time."

"Like father, like son, huh?" Olivia said smirking.

"Oh yeah, well I see you're still saving your smiles for those rare opportune times whenever I bring up the thought of Walter."

She hated herself for being that predictable but when it came to Peter, hiding any emotion or thought from him was near impossible. For once, she decided to let herself go.

"Well…" she said, her smile still intact. "It can't be helped I suppose."

"No, no," Peter protested. "Please don't say you think my dysfunctional relationship with my father is…cute".

"I'm not going to say anything then." Olivia walked past Peter into the store with her proud smirk growing bigger.

The search for the special present for Walter was going to be hectic. Everything had to look exactly as the photograph Peter had entailed, and Olivia understood the significance as to why.

Olivia had a list of possible stores and other places in Metropolitan Boston that might have one. They searched all of them with no matches. They agreed that they would have to work their way outside of Boston to try the smaller towns.

Five hours after beginning their search, with the darkness of Christmas Eve night close at hand, they finally found a match.

Walter was stirring awake from his long unusual nap. He heard some unusual scuffling outside of the closet and then Peter opened the door to reveal himself.

"Oh dear. Have I been asleep that long?" Walter asked.

"If only it were longer, Walter," Peter replied. "Now shut up for a minute while I get you your Christmas present."

"Oh yes, it is Christmas Eve isn't it? Oh, I did get something for you."

"You did?" Peter asked him suspiciously.

"Yes, of course, don't you remember? I got you the Beetle Farm. Many parents terrify at the thought of their children handling ant farms but I knew you would appreciate Beetle Farms for their variety of species and their fascinating ability to decompose the corpses of small animals."

"Walter…you got me that when I was 10 years old. Get with this century."

Peter helped Walter out of the closet. "Anyway, here's what I got you. Merry Christmas and such."

He showed Walter what was lying on the couch and Walter's eyes widened with amazement. There on the couch, was a small hairy Border Collie, sitting happily and staring back at Walter with his drooling tongue.

"What's that Peter?"

Peter was frustrated by his first response. "Walter…don't you remember? It's good old Rufus. He ran away from home after you left and now, he came back…on Christmas Eve of all days."

Walter examined the dog very closely. Peter had a hunch that Walter would forget about learning of Rufus's true fate a few months ago. Sugarcoating the possibility of Rufus's return seemed to amuse Peter more than he thought it would. Or perhaps he was hoping deep down for Walter to act like himself and truly believe that this was the same Rufus from two decades ago.

"Peter, do you take me for a fool?"

"Do you want my honest opinion?"

"I know this isn't Rufus," Walter said grumbling. "I mean…I know that this dog in particular isn't Rufus, granted it looks just like him."

Peter was shocked. He never heard Walter say anything that almost sounded so close to sanity before. Acknowledging that the dead-on similar looking dog wasn't Rufus was not something Peter expected from a man who lived more in his memories (and in his past) than in the current present times.

"But it's the thought…" Walter mumbled. "It's the thought that counts, yes."

He walked away, leaving Peter very confused. He wasn't expecting Walter to be this mellow about a Christmas present…especially one from his son. Was he expecting too much…and if so why? Perhaps, he thought Walter and Christmas seemed like something in Peter's mind the perfect match from hell. Cheeriness and child-like innocence…on a day where the most of both worlds was expected, from a man he could barely stand.

Peter grabbed himself a beer and sat down on the couch. He sighed knowing that this Christmas was his first with a family member in so long, yet it felt so…hollow.

Walter grabbed a tall glass of eggnog and took a place on the other side of the couch. Peter immediately went about putting a pillow wall between the two of them and then he turned the TV on to It's a Wonderful Life. The movie amused Walter enough to get him laughing and rambling about Jimmy Stewart.

Christmas still felt empty...hollow...pointless...and it was only 9:30 at night.

"Peter, do you remember what I got you for Christmas when you were five?"

"No," Peter replied.

"How about when you were seven?"

"Bad memory, Walter," Peter lied.

"Oh well I remember every present I ever got you…"

Oh no, Peter thought. Walter was going to go though nearly 10 years of past Christmases. This was not something he thought he could cope with given that Peter would rather just watch the movie.

Finally, things reached a breaking point when the Border Collie jumped onto the couch and started slobbering all over Peter.

"Down Rufus," said Walter.

NOW he was calling him Rufus?

"Okay I can't take this anymore," Peter said. "I mean, Walter…I'm going to go out for a little bit…to buy some food or eggnog or something edible that you haven't tainted."

Peter walked out the door leaving Walter and 'Rufus 2' as he dubbed him on the couch soaking in the Jimmy Stewart film.

"Could you get me some Gingerbread Men?" Walter called out. "I would love to experiment with the properties of sweets in creating gingerbread juices."

Peter, unfortunately, did hear his request.

Olivia checked the clock as she was near completion of her last file. Only 10:00? There was a part of her that wishing it was much later than that. It didn't really matter to her though. Being at work wasn't going to be any more pleasant than being at home given everything that she encountered in her own kitchen...and in her mail.

It was no surprise to herself that the office would be dark and empty on Christmas Eve except for her. She looked up from her work believing to have heard the elevator down the hallway, but this time around, she was against investigating the noise. If anything, the vision of dead John in her workplace again would annoy her more than terrify her.

When she finally got to her last page, her instincts told her to look up. Her eyes darted away from the papers and straight into the eyes of Peter…standing there at the entrance to her office.

"I had a feeling I'd find you here," smiled Peter.

Keeping a straight face, Olivia's eyes darted back to her work. "I'm just working on a few files."

"And they ask you to do it? Of all people? On Christmas?"

"Charlie, Broyles, and everyone else have their families to be with, and I'm not going to be the cause of prying them away from that. So I volunteered," she said. "Plus I'm almost done."

"That's good because I have another favor to ask of you."

She looked up at him. "Really? Did 'Rufus' failed to meet your father's expectations?"

"No, I think he and Rufus 2 are getting along great." Peter walked over to Olivia's desk. "Walter responded to it…the way Walter responds to anything."

"What do you need then?"

"Walter insists on going through the history of every family Christmas we had together, and I don't know if that's going to be before, after, or while he experiments with the liquid properties of Gingerbread Men. I think I gave him a little bit too much eggnog while we were out shopping for him. I don't think I'm going to survive the night. I was thinking maybe…"

Olivia looked at him confused, wondering what the hell they would be able to find on Christmas Eve that would help Peter with Walter's antics tonight. All the stores would be close by now.

"…if you came over for a while. Maybe Walter will talk about something else…or at least attempt to be a little more proper in conversation with another person present."

Looking down at her work again, Olivia didn't realize that her work was finally completed. A part of her wanted to stay and hoped for more pages behind it though.

"I don't know if it's really such a good idea, Peter."

"And I don't think you really want to spend Christmas Eve with her nose deep in work that I know you don't really need to work on," he said. "Is it really that bad to take the night off and spend a couple of hours with people you know?"

"That's exactly my point, Peter," Olivia responded quite coldly.

Peter just stood there silent and stunned.

Not bearing to look at him, Olivia sighed and said timidly, almost shaking, "I just don't think it's...appropriate for co-workers to be spending Christmas together…or do anything not related to work, together…especially at someone's home."

Peter nodded in understanding, knowing all to clear what it was that was pounding these negative beliefs inside her head.

Soon, an idea took shape in his own head, and he placed a hand on Olivia's desk to divert her attention away from the files.

"Suppose," Peter said optimistically. "…that Walter's gingerbread men experiment could explain a possible defect in humans that carried high amounts of sugar. He did say something about a past experiment he did that caused people with too much sugar in their system to…melt."

Olivia raised an eyebrow.

"They melted?"

"Well parts of their bodies did, like their limbs and noses, from what Walter recalls. I wouldn't be surprised if we get a case real soon of people having their noses or hands fall off. And I'm thinking whatever Walter's working on could get us a head start on curing the problem…don't you?"

She didn't know what to think. Was it so obvious that she wanted to avoid another Christmas where she was going to feel out of place? Or was it the fact that last Christmas brought about the grim reminder of the pain she brought for others that got close to her? Maybe she just hated any day worth celebrating. She already had birthdays on the hate list. Christmas was going to be too easy of an addition.

"This is something you can't do in the lab?" Olivia asked. A small pinch of curiosity inside of her wanted to know what excuse Peter would have for that.

"There would be no way I would be able to pry Walter out of the apartment on a holiday," said Peter. "Especially when they're going to show Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer on TV in a couple of hours. By then, he'll try to experiment with the idea of a glowing red nose on Rufus 2 with all the Christmas lights in the apartment building."

Olivia chuckled to herself at the idea of Walter shoving Christmas lights through poor Rufus 2's nostrils.

Peter looked at her and asked "Is that you thinking 'yes'?"

"Yes, Peter," Olivia said looking back at him. "It's me thinking I should come over and make sure Rufus doesn't end up like that papaya he blew up."

"Uh-uh-uh," said Peter correcting her. "It's Rufus 2, remember. Walter kind of knows that it's…not the original."

Arriving at the apartment, Peter and Olivia carried bags of Gingerbread cookies and other assortments of food from a gas station…the only place with anything edible that was still open on Christmas Eve.

The only thing that entered Peter's mind as the two of them approached the door was 'for the love of God, I hope Walter is wearing clothes'.

Peter carefully opened the door and was quite relieved to see nothing seemed askew.

"Um…Peter."

Olivia tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention. She pointed Peter towards the direction of the couch. The TV was blaring the final scene of It's A Wonderful Life with "Hark the Herald Angels Sing" being sung to everyone's ignorance. As Peter got closer he found Walter lying in an unusual position with bubbles of eggnog evolving from his mouth. Eggnog seemed to be all over his neck and face.

And on top of him, was Rufus 2, licking Walter's skin.

"Rufus 2! Down!" Peter said pulling the dog away before the dog's tongue reached Walter's mouth.

Walter was stirred awake by all the commotion. The taste of eggnog still fresh on his tongue.

"Oh…Peter…Olivia," he said looking at them smiling. He then looked down at his stained clothes. "Best I go change yes?"

"Yes, please," said Peter. "And I hope to God that's eggnog on your pants as well."

Walter returned having changed into an unusual pair of wool pajamas, which only made Olivia feel a bit awkward in his presence. It wasn't a bad awkwardness, however. It was quite the opposite kind, meant to be fun and light hearted…almost comfortable even.

He went to the kitchen to work on his little Gingerbread Experiment while Peter offered Olivia a warm drink of cider. She would peak into the kitchen every now and then with concern that Walter would blow up the entire apartment building but Peter kept telling her it would be fine. They both began to ignore Walter as he rambled on about how turkeys were formally killed and eaten by humans before modern technology took care of things. It was nothing pleasant to listen to.

Instead Olivia found herself sitting comfortably on the couch with Rufus 2 joining her side. Out of instinct, she let him lie on her lap as she stroked his long fur.

Peter watched her, satisfied that she was feeling so relaxed on the couch with Rufus 2. Her presence at the apartment ended up working in his favor at last, filling the awkward void of his first Christmas he was spending with Walter in nearly two decades.

"You see, Olivia. Keeping an eye on Walter is a two-person job during the holidays."

She smiled at him and said "how are we ever going to handle him during New Year's?"

"Closet," Peter immediately suggested. "And no more eggnog."

The apartment was smelly and dirty, and there was nothing to really eat except for Twinkies and holiday cookies. Nothing to drink except for hard liquor and the melted Gingerbread drink Walter concocted, which Olivia and Peter tasted. It was nasty. Yet Olivia didn't seem to mind it at all and she knew it. How was this possible? A year ago, she was in a large cold mansion surrounded by unwelcoming faces. But here, in this pigsty with Rufus 2 on her lap, and Walter in the other room wearing those odd wool pajamas, she finally felt it. She finally the warmth and comfort that she thought was lost to her on Christmas so many years ago.

She barely knew the Bishops but she would always envy them for not acknowledging the joys of the simple life they were having together since being reunited. She saw their bickering as pleasant family tradition and their junk and lab equipment scattered everywhere as a symbol of their content with their home life.

Most of all, what got to Olivia the most, was how much they made her feel welcomed in their living quarters everytime she was there. Truly, they did seem to go out of their way many times to make her to feel as though she could be part of their dysfunctional little family...that is if she ever needed one.

Olivia began to believe that someday...she just might need them.

"Oh no," said Peter. "Rudolph's on."

Her eyes turned to the freaky puppet animation on the tv screen. Sure enough, it was 'Rudolph'.

Peter quickly got up and said to Olivia, with great concern, "keep Rufus 2 away from Walter while I confiscate all the Christmas lights in the building."

Despite Peter's worry of the dangerous experiments with Gingerbread Men...and possibly Rufus 2, Olivia leaned back on the couch with her arms embracing the Border Collie, having the most relaxing, peaceful holiday in years.

~END~ hope you enjoyed your early holiday stocking stuffer!