Hello! I do NOT own any YuYuHakusho character, I only wish, thisis adissclamer XD...
Thank you and please enjoy the story --!
Yu Yu Half
By: Dana Torrico and Mara Stuart
Missions have been too easy lately, the monsters are weak and the battles are dull...
"We need to spice up the show"Koenma agreed shamelessly to himself, watching the boys through his spirit world television. Botan smirked behind him, clearly just as evil.
"Koenma, sir, you sure you want to do this to them?"
"Yes, of course I do! That's why I sent them to get the item!"He and Botan laughed while Ogar sat off to the side, sweating bullets, as the plot began to unfold unbeknownst to the spirt detectives...
Chapter 1: While they slept
The sun was setting on a long day of-cough-"fighting for justice and world peace!"O.o;;...(j/k)
Really meaning the complection of a mission from Koenma...kicking demon ass usually. Yes, that was the life of Yusuke Urameshi, Kazuma Kuwabara, Kurama, and Hiei. They all usually got something out of doing these missions, but lately they have figured out that they could get a whole lot more for less. Why waist their time on something that doesn't concern them? They were busy enough with their own lives as it is! Koenma should get someone more expandable...
"Man, I can't believe Koenma...gezz-. It was hardly worth making that trip,"grumbled Kuwabara tossing something in his hand,"...Waist of a sunny day in human world."Yusuke sighed next to him.
..."At lease it could have been a school day, I wanted to see Keiko, oh well, I'll just ditch tomaro."He shrugged away the thought as Kuwabara tossed the item to him.
"You're going to break it,"Kurama foretold" that artifact cost us a lot of time. So please...don't drop it."Kuwabara snorted. To him it was just a statue of a person (Girl? Boy?) in a farm dress holding a basket of fruit (cherries to be exact). Big deal...it was weird!
Just then Yusuke tossed the statue back to him and Kuwabara juggled it around like a hot potato before it was sent crashing to the ground.! Bang ! O.o;;
Everyone froze, even Hiei who was until now ignoring them, as pink smoke rose up from the hollow pieces laying at Kuwabaras feet engulfing them for a few moments...
cough cough-"...Kuwabara, you didn't..!"
"Yea, he did..."Yusuke answered Kurama as he patted off the pink fibers on his face.-cough-"Frig'n Idiot-"
"Opps! Heh this really sucks, guess you shouldn't have jinxed it Kurama;;-"Kuwabara chuckled in his own defense stepping way from them waving one hand.
"Blaming me?"said Kurama asked horsily. Hiei unsheathed his katana and started to close in on him wearing one of his very unforgiving faces.
"H-Hiei? Wait! Don't kill me, uh, Kill Yusuke! He's the one who can't throw!"They both chased him around the park until they got to the separation point were they all went there separate ways. Kuwabara and Yusuke were still brawling.
"I can't wait to see the look on your face as Koenmas dad gives you spankings!"Yusuke jeered almost mockingly as Kuwabara dropped the shattered pieces into a town dumpster.-"You're so dumb, he's going to find out."
"Ah! Shut up will ya! I think if I get into trouble you will too since it was half your fault-" smack -("ow!")
"Don't count on it punk."glare
"Well see you later then!"Kurama interrupted,"Good night, I'm going to go home and try to sleep off that this mission ever happened..."He said hopeful and tiered... yawn"-"Night Hiei."
"Hmn..."sounded Hiei as he too disappeared to where ever he sleeps at night...(probably a tree;;). Kurama trudged on down the deserted neighborhood street to his home leaving the two boys at the cross roads.
"Bye dead man!"
"Shut up! Gezz!"/It can't possibly be that bad! He's just messing with your mind./"You'll see, everything will be fine-"
"Sure, whatever you say..."Yusuke smirked, as they headed down different streets to their beds.
...Sweet dreams...
Kurama's morning-
It was a beautiful, sunny, spring morning at the Minamino residence. The birds were chirping and there was the usual hum of students passing by the house on the way to Monday classes.
Sunlight crept through the curtains of the downstairs bedroom, making the white bed sheets glow and the sleeping silhouette inside them stir. Green eyes slid open as the alarm clock was tapped off. The room was warm as the girl slid from the mattress covers and walked over to the window, as she did almost every morning, pulling the curtains fully open. She smiled happily for the whole world to see. Oh, and they did see...the two teenage boys that were passing the house stopped dead in their tracks, struck by the beauty of a girl posing in her bedroom window. For, unknown to the girl, her boyish pajama top had come completely unbuttoned during the night, exposing her newly slender figure she never knew she had. They finally caught her attention-
/"What are they staring at?"/ Kurama wondered, not understanding a single expression on their faces (...looks of perversion.). After a minuet, He looked past them and admired the glorious day that didn't involve fighting demons or Spirit World. Or so he thought. Kurama shrugged twirling around to grab his school uniform that was in the closet. That's when he passed the mirror...
O.O...and his heart skipped a few beats-/"G-Girl"/;;;
There was a knock on the bedroom door, it was Kuramas mother. /"!"/
"Suichi!"came her voice,"Suichi? You're going to be late! Do you need me to pack a lunch for you?"she asked very motherly. Kurama was on the floor, huddled into a ball with a white sheet covering everything below his shoulders. Feeling very out of breath and hot, not to mention ill.
"N-No!"squeaked the feminine voice,"I'm... not feeling very well!"It was hard trying to sound like himself.
"I'm going to stay home today...oh! And I'm contagious, so don't come in."He already locked the door but he knew his mother better than that to thinka lock would stop her from seeing him. He could feel two soft lumps squish together as he pulled the sheets around him closer.
"You sure don't sound well...are you sure you don't want me to check up on you?"Kuramas mind was in such a fragile state that he had to stop himself from screaming at her to leave. He couldn't bare the thought of his mother walking in on him...like this. But after a while she bought the fib and walked down the hallway and into the kitchen to call his school...
/Why is this happening...what Im I going to do! TTTT;;.../
Now was his chance! He opened the door and crept upstairs, careful not to trip on the sheets, and into his mothers room for some clothing. Even though nothing in her closet was up to todays style, he hastily threw something together, not daring to borrow a bra or underwear.
Kurama then very ungracefully climbed out the window and down the Sakura tree, disappearing into his neighbors back yards. Feeling very clumsy and flusterd as he tripped on his skirt numerous times (running too was very odd). And on top of that, the two boys were still standing there, taking pictures of him! Kurama was on the verge of tears...
Yusuke's morning:
Bam-Bam-Bam!-"Yusuke! It's 9! Get up!" Yusuke groaned silently cursing at his mother from underneath his pillow.
Throwing the covers off he scratched his head and stood...stretching.Moving his hand to his ass, for another good scratch, he walked over to the bathroom. With sleep still in his eyes he stood before the toilet, pants down as he went to grab this...um-tool.-
...Standing there a moment holding nothing, he went to grab it again, again, and again. Looking down with one eye passing over two small breasts into to his empty hand. Again he just stood there a moment before throwing the seat down and relieving himself.
/Damn, I hate these realistic dreams. But why the hell am I a girl this time? Weird.../
He flushed the toilet, turning to leave the bathroom, slamming his toe into the lower sink cabinet giving him a jolt of pain.
"G-God damn-it!"He grabbed his foot and started to hop into the bedroom losing balance leading to a head on collision with the floor. Yusukes nose was now bleeding from impact.
Bam-Bam-Bam!-"Yusuke what the hell's going on in there!"
"Nothing!"-/"Ow!"/
"Fine, well I'm going out. I'll probably be back late so eat the leftovers...Bye!"
Yusuke herd her footsteps scurry down the stairs and the front door slam shut as he sat on the floor pinching his runny nose.
/"Can you feel pain in dreams? Hey, my voice...it's high-pitched, like a chicks.-Cricket-cricket ...Like....A chick!Wah-"/
Yusuke got up and ran to the bathroom frozen in-front of the mirror (both hands grabbing the sink). He blinked twice... and then started to turn every which way admiring his lean and feminine body.
Running his hands up his stomach, over his breasts, and then down the small of his back.Grin-
"Woah...COOL! HAHAHA! This means...now I can touch myself." He smiled evilly, giving one of his breasts a poke. Quite taking this whole transformation in a very Yusukeish way .
Kuwabaras morning:
"Hey little bro, it's time for school."Shizuru let herself into the dark room, getting a whiff of her brothers dirty laundry scattered on the floor,"You better not have fallen asleep on your math book again-"She walked over to the blinds, twisting them open, releasing the light.
"Hey, get off you lazy ass and..."-she yanks the covers off the bed, cigarette falling from her lips, as she gapes at the girl who has comfortably overtaken her brothers bed.
-"What the f-"she looks down at the cigarette burning a hole in the mattress and stomps on it furiously.
"Sis, what are you doing..?"The girl sat up rubbing the sleep-dust innocently from her eyelashes. Shizuru looked up chuckling in almost a sarcastic tone, knowing exactly what the situation is and how to handle it.
"Heh did you and Kuwabara get married last night, cause as far as I can tell, I am not your sister! To me, you're just a sick little girl looking to take advantage of a dumb kid like Kazuma. So what did you do? Ditch him in some alleyway? Rape him of all his money? You better start explaining fast cause I don't act too nice when it comes to my brother." The carrot-haired girl still sitting confused on the floor could see the veins pulse in the older girl's face and could hear steam spout from her ears explosively.
"Huh? Shizuru what are you talking about? I didn't do anyth-"Shizurus fist suddenly shot at her face missing by inches as she scrambled against the opposite wall.
"What the hell!-" Kuwabara tried to make a run for it but tripped on some old underwear and face planted the carpet, butt propped up on his knees. Shizuru pounced on him like a lion wrapping him up in the bed covers before you could say "Puu", leaving only the head visible.
"Who are you? And what have you done with Kuzuma!" Shizuru sat on Kuwabaras stomach looking down into the new face, arms and legs crossed as she puffed another cigaret.
"Sis, it's ME! Who else... have the drugs really gone to your head this time...? I thought it would be obvious that the person you're crushing is always me!" Shizuru frowned, grabbing a fist full of long curly hair as she dragged Kuwabara from the room. The captive yelled in pain as he hit the cement steps coming down the apartment stairs and to the front door.
"Have a nice flight!"Shizuru grinned tossing the human bundle into the street like an unwanted sofa, slamming the door shut behind her. Shocked Kuwabara wiggled back and forth on the pavement. When the blanket finally unraveled he jumped up and ran to the front door.
Bam-Bam-Bam!"Shizuru, you rotten bitch, let me in!"
Immediately the door flew open. A vase smacked Kuwabara square in the face; braking some teeth and leaving a huge pulsing red circle as proof of pain. Soon other house-hold goodies came flying out, but this time Kuwabara was ready and dodged, a little ungracefully.
"You just don't know when to quite do you!"Shizuru appeared, admiring the mess of broken objects sprawled around her pray. The girl wearing a loose wife-beater shirt and boxers stained with sweat from the workout stared in anger at the older sister.
"I'm not kidding around Shizuru, I need to get ready for school, can you just stop being a old hag for one second?"he added sass to the last word.
Then Shizuru rolled up her sleeves, reminding Kuwabara of The Running of the Bulls, as he ran for his life through the neighborhood (a wild animal on his trail).
"Shizuru STOP!"Kuwabara cried daring to scream over his shoulder.
Kuwabara would have made good time too if he hadn't picked up the sound of two boys, at a film development stand, talking loudly about "Some very hot babe at the Minamino residence striping in-front of he open window"! Too bad Kuwabara didn't hear that. Because then he tripped big-time, in mid air, slow-motion, as the loose boxers slipped down around his ankles as he hit the deck. The two boys whipped out their cameras and snapped pictures like the they were Austin Powers. Kuwabara hit the ground hard, feeling new pain on his chest and creating a huge cloud of dust covering him entirely. Shizuru screeched to a halt burning a holes into the pavement, then searched wildly for the perpetrator.
"Now you're going to see who's the old hag after I'm done with you!"Again she rolls up her sleeves, face an angry mess.
/Cough-cough-"Oh no my boxers...w-what the... HOLLY MOTHER! My-oh no-!"Kuwabara found his boxers and dove into the bushes.
"Huh? Where the hell did you go?"Shizuru looked around, not noticing her brother crouched within the bush, weeping silently.
-/"I'm a girl. A GIRL!sniffle/...TTTT
Suddenly some sirens sounded as cop cars pulled up beside Shizuru and three officers stepped out.
"Ma-m, we got a call about a disturbance, would you come with us please?"
Shizuru threw a bunch of curse words as the cops put her in the back-seat and drove away. Kuwabara poked his head from the bush feeling relieved that he was going to escape, it was short lived however, the fact that Shizuru would be even MEANER when she got home: sucked! Kuwabara started to cry for some reason, he just felt to vulnerable and frail that the tears could not be held back!
"Why?"Kuwabara yelled, wiping the tears away.
"I gotta find help, someone must know what happened!" And with a destination in site, he scurried off sciently (passing the two boys paying the developer for three rolls of film;;)...
Street Show:
Kurama decided to round up Yusuke, Hiei, and Kuwabara to go with him over to Genkai's Temple, she probably knows a lot more about weird stuff like this and more importantly knows how to cure it.
"Please Genkai, hopefully you can change this/
But even before he had a chance to look, an unusually big crowd in the city street caught his attention. Kurama noticed right away that the gender of the crowd was entirely male! Young men, some older, and Businessmen; and they all were watching what appeared to be a very exciting and arousing street show.
"Hey baby, how much for a night?" he heard one ask above the rest (Kurama stood on tip-toes trying to see over bobbing heads).
"Depends if I wanna give myself up so soon, this bod is brand new, I still need to wear it in." came a catty reply.
/Hmm... that voice sound familiar. Where have I heard it before?.../Kurama pondered through names before successfully penetrating the innermost crowd, where the name he was looking for suddenly screamed in his brain-
-/YUSUKE?! Kurama gasped! It was even worse then he could have ever imagined, it was even worse than finding the person! Because Yusuke was wearing:...a black, leather, glossy... strippers outfit cough! Kurama almost snapped a nerve-
/My, GOD/
"I know you want some boys," Yusuke winked, twirling into a pose (absolutely unaware of the disgust on his friends face), the boys went wild. And Kurama couldn't stop gaping. "Yes, I'm hot and you know it!"snap
"Yusuke!"stormed in Kurama, grabbing one of the strippers arms and tugging it down to where he could scold his crazed friend without anyone in hearing, "what are you doing!"
"Oh! Kurama! You got turned into a girl too?"eyes scan; bottom to top..."Why are you dressed like a blind school teacher?"