A/N: Gods. Just a really stupid, pointless and plotless piece that didn't go away... I'm ashamed. I am. Yes.
Warnings: Rude language, implied male/male action
A Real Shock
"Honestly, James! I haven't taken your stupid broom!" Sirius said angrily.
"Yeah, right!" James snorted.
"I swear across my hard, thick, long, stinking and cheesy cock, I haven't taken it", Sirius said gravely. James bit his lip to prevent himself from laughing.
"Don't say that", Remus said quietly behind his book. James rolled his eyes: Remus The Prude was once again hurt by their rude language.
"Oo, does it hurt your poor ears, Moony?" Sirius cooed
"No. You are not supposed to swear across something that doesn't exist", Remus said calmly.
"What do you mean by that?" Sirius asked.
"Your cock isn't very long or thick", Remus answered smoothly. Sirius turned red.
"Wait! Moony, have you seen his cock?" James asked, his eyes wide and worried. Sirius turned redder.
"Of course not", Remus said, his eyes still on the book. James relaxed.
"I had my eyes closed", Remus continued. James frowned.
"It does stink, though", Remus went on and James spluttered.
"How do you know that?" he screamed.
"Can't you smell it?" Remus asked. He seemed to be honestly surprised.
"Oh, yeah. You're a werewolf. Good sense of smell, eh?" James asked and relaxed. He glanced at Sirius whose face seemed to be burning from the inside. Well, his would too if Remus went around sniffing his cock...
Sirius looked at James and left the room whimpering quietly, his face still as red and hot as the Sun.
"Hmm. And it really does taste like cheese", Remus muttered.
James realised a little too late that he should have gone to the bathroom earlier.
A/N2. Gods. No comments.