*Warning character death*
A/N I do not nor have I ever owned Twilight.
*This story is a touchy subject for myself and anyone who has ever been bullied passed the breaking point.*
Hey you with your head held high, well
You got em' real good, I hope it feels good
Hey you trying so hard not to cry, well
I know you're fed up, but keep your head up
Gay, dyke, fat, geek, and ugly...just words to bullies but knives and daggers to victims. My scars aren't just skin deep. Being the fat girl in school was never the easiest. I had thoughts of suicide too many times to count. I only had my best friend Alice Brandon who was with me through it all. She helped me wash paint out of my hair, clean my car of all the hateful words written on it. Little did I know that inside her cheery exterior was a scared and battered little girl. She kept her biggest secret from me...she cut herself daily to get rid of the pain. Alice was a lesbian and apparently she was being taunted and ridiculed for it. I guess she was pushed too far on October 14th 2003. Alice and Rosalie were going to meet at the mall after school to go shopping while I was working. Only Alice never showed up, she supposedly needed to stop by her house to grab some money. Rosalie waited at the mall for 2 hours before she got worried. She pulled up to Alice's house to find Alice's brother Emmett waiting for her. Emmett told Rosalie that Alice was dead. Alice was found in her bathtub with a bottle antidepressants and a bloody razor blade on the floor beside the tub. Alice was in the water which was a deep red holding a letter written to her. Emmett called the ambulance, but they were too late. Alice was gone. Rosalie, Emmett and myself leaned on each other after Alice's suicide. We started going to a support and grief group for bullied teens. There we met a gay couple Paul and Jasper, who have been together since 8th grade. We met so many individuals who were so different yet had one thing in common...they are bullied or lost a loved one to bullying. We met life long friends in that group who knew our pain. It was there that I revealed my deepest secret...I burned myself. Being fat was never easy. I went on diets, exercised, measured food, you name it I did it. I just couldn't lose the weight. By going to that support group I learned to accept that, that was who I am.
~~~~~~~~IGB~~~~~~~~ IGB~~~~~~~~ IGB~~~~~~~
Cause people only see what they wanna
People goin' believe what they're gunna
They don't understand the life that you choose
They've never walked a mile in you shoes
No, no, no, no
So whatcha goin' do with the haters
Just gotta excuse they're behavior
Just don't give up hope, I just want you to know that
15 years can change people: Rosalie and Alice were planning on getting married right after graduation and living out their dreams of being fashion designers. Now, Rosalie is living out that dream for the both of them. She is now living a happy life with her partner Leah, who is pregnant with their second child, their first is in preschool. I was Isabella Swan, now I am Bella Cullen I am a psychiatrist who now is the head of the support group that helped me accept my best friend death. It also helped me accept who I am. My husband is the principal of my former high school. Despite my weight problems Edward has always been by my side...he helped me gain confidence. We have 2 children and are happy. I never will be the ideal weight but I am okay with that. I will always be MY ideal weight. Rosalie will never be 'straight' but she will always be Rosalie, biggest name in fashion history. We will always be US and no one can take that away from us.
~~~~~~~~IGB~~~~~~~~ IGB~~~~~~~~ IGB~~~~~~~
Maybe today seems cloudy and grey,
So full of sarrow and tomorrow seems so far away
But it gets better, yeah it gets better
I know the orld keeps throwing you strife,
But keep on struting down this yellow brick road called life
Cause it gets better, yeah it gets better
If we can take a stand against bullying we could save the lives of the children and teens who are being bullied. They have too much to offer the world. For every life we lose we could be losing the next president, school teacher, pop star, etc... the list goes on and on. If we save even one life we will have made a difference in someone's life.
I am kind of back but will only be posting short stories our one shoots from now on. I have found out that I have grown up and don't have as much time to write a long story if I do end up posting and writing a long story it would be during summer. But hopefully you will be satisfied with what I do post.
Happy readings,
Ashes