A/N: First Primeval fanfic, so please let me know what you think :)
Set in 3x03, this is a response to an 'alternative ending' challenge.
Disclaimer: don't own anything...
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Black smoke was filling the air and the stinging smell gave Jenny a good excuse for the tears she felt welling up in her eyes – not that anyone even cared for her excuses at the moment. All eyes were set on the burning building, everyone was watching the flames dancing in the sky, each member of the team making up different scenarios about what was happening to Cutter at the moment. It was a sure guess that they were all thinking about Cutter. Over the years he had become a father figure for some of them and everyone, including the newcomers, looked up to him. He had been their anchor, a quiet source of strength and security for the whole team and Jenny had been the one to let him run into the fire. She could almost feel the angry eyes on her back, but who could blame them? Maybe if she had tried harder to hold Cutter back he would have stayed... Words just hadn't been enough.
She had been leaning against one of the cars, staring into blank space, trying to make sense of Cutter's actions. Why save Helen? It had hurt her, the fact that he was putting his own life in danger just to save his ex-wife – the woman who had tried to sabotage their whole project time and time again. Jenny knew that he probably would have done it for anybody, but didn't Helen deserve to die? She was the one who got them into the whole mess in the first place. It had been her people who had placed the bomb. It served her right if she got killed by it now.
The jealousy she felt had paralyzed her for a second, but that had been all it took for Cutter to run out of her reach and into the building. It would have been so easy to grab his arm, to hold him back... to make him stay with her, but instead, she had just watched him go, unable to move or even blink.
Sounds had become almost blanketed after he had escaped her sight, but the loud crash woke her from the trance. Even before she looked up to see a giant fire blaze escape one of the upper floors, her heart had started to beat faster, pounding against her chest.
"He's been gone too long." Jenny was the first one to break the silence that had settled over the team. Desperation and determination fought for dominance in her eyes, as she placed her hands on her hips and focused on the building's entrance. From the corner of her eye she noticed Abby speaking softly to Connor and that was all it took for her to make a decision. If somebody went in after Cutter, it would be her. Risking another member of the team was not a chance she would take. Connor was too valuable for research. She could be spared, should anything happen.
"Connor, I'll go," she told the young man sternly, leaving the rest of the team wide eyed in surprise. Nobody had expected something like this from her, she supposed. Not after she had let Cutter go... or maybe they just didn't think she had it in her. It wasn't something she would have seen herself doing a few months, or maybe even some weeks ago, but in this situation, she knew she had to act.
Blocking out the sounds of her surroundings once again, Jenny set her eyes on the burning entrance. She could already feel the heat, wavering around her body and she could only imagine how much worse the situation must have been inside. Stopping mere steps away from the building, she closed her eyes briefly and took a deep breath of smoke filled air. Now or never, she thought before bravely covering the last remaining distance and entering the building.
Suddenly, she was almost hyper aware of everything that was happening around her. Cables ripping, sending off sparks, fire flaring up from every direction, ceilings collapsing... Dark brown eyes shimmering with tears of shock and horror yet again, Jenny made her way through the debris, softly calling Cutter's name. The picture that had laid out in front of her had shrunken her hope to find him alive, but her mind was set on not leaving until she at least found his body, no matter how gruesome that was going to be for her. Her mind was reeling with thoughts, but at the same time every single one seemed to be blurred. At some point, it seemed to her, she had simply stopped listening to her thoughts and started following her instincts. She was moving deeper and deeper into the building, struggling to find a somewhat easy path through the remains of her work place.
It had probably only been a matter of time, but when her heel got stuck in the debris, she still felt her body tense up. Bending down to free her shoe, she caught sight of limp fingers not far away from where she was standing. For a second, her heart seemed to stop, but then she frantically started to stumble towards the hand, praying to God that she would find the rest of the body fully attached.
She had never believed in God, but reaching Cutter and feeling a faint pulse under her fingertips, she didn't know who else to thank. Faint relief washed over her for a moment, but was soon overpowered by the tingling sensation of panic. How was she supposed to get the unconscious man out of the burning building? Could he even be moved?
"Nick," she whispered pleadingly, placing a hand on his cheek, while the other began to check his body for wounds. It didn't take long before her fingers met with warm, sticky liquid and she didn't have to see the daunting red color of it to know it was blood. In a matter of seconds she had torn off the jacket she was wearing and pressed it against the wound in order to stop the blood flow.
"Wake up, Nick!" Her voice was breaking with desperation and the tears she had kept under control for so long were finally spilling, leaving trails on her ash covered cheeks. She wasn't expecting any sign of life from Cutter, but then his head moved slightly. It would have been easy for Jenny to write it off as a trick of her mind, but suddenly, she found herself looking into quiet blue eyes.
"What are you doing here, Jenny?," he asked hoarsely, trying to sit up, but jerking back down at the pain in his abdomen.
"I... I had to see you," she answered, looking away. Now that she thought about it, it didn't make a lot of sense that she had gone in after Cutter. One of the boys should have... at least they would have been able to carry their boss out. There was no logical explanation. She had acted in the spur of the moment, following her heart for once and now Cutter could easily have to pay for that mistake with his life. Slapping herself mentally for writing the man off while he was still breathing, she watched with horror as his eye lids started fluttering.
"Take good care of the team," he told her quietly. "And find out what this means."
Following the weak point of his finger, Jenny noticed an ancient looking artifact, but refused to acknowledge any of his words concerning his own future. "Don't say things like that! You'll take care of the team, just like you always have!" It was a weak try, but a try nonetheless. If Cutter was already talking as if he was dying, then there probably wasn't much left for her to do.
As if he could read her thoughts, Cutter lifted his arm in an invitation for Jenny, who had kept staring at him in desperation. Looking down at Nick's arm, she heard her reason telling her to go find help, but this time she didn't feel complied to answer to her mind at all. How could she leave him there anyway?
It seemed like the only real option for her when she accepted Cutter's invitation and curled up on the dirty floor at his side, carefully placing her head on his chest while her hand was still pressing the fabric of her jacket against his injury. Nick's arm wrapped around her body and for that moment, the only thing Jenny wanted was for this to happen in a different place at a different time. This couldn't possibly be the end, could it?
Lifting her head, she met Cutter's eyes and desperately searched for the well known glow in them, but all she could find was a dull version of what had been a vibrant blue not long ago.
"Don't leave me," she begged, but his expression stayed unmoving. "Nick, please!"
Cutter had brought a finger to her lips, silencing her almost instantly. It lingered there for a while, before fluttering over her face and tucking away one of the many stray strands of hair that had fallen into her eyes. A completely unexpected move followed, when all of the sudden he leaned in, meeting her lips with his own. It was a brief connection and one that had cost Cutter the last bit of his strength. Slumping back into his previous position, his chest heaved with one last breath, while his eyes held on to Jenny's.
Still confused by the kiss, it took her a little while until realization set in and it seemed that exactly that tiny delay of her reaction had let him go.
Jenny looked at his lifeless features in silence, paralyzed by the sight before her. When she finally felt herself able to move again, she numbly resumed her position next to Cutter's body. Helpers would come and find her eventually, she thought, burying her face in the black cotton of his shirt. They would come too late.
The End