Title: Still Hurting
Rating: PG
Summary: Kurt Hummel's over and Kurt Hummel's gone. Kurt has decided it's time to move on. Kurt has new dreams he's building upon. And Blaine's still hurting. But Sebastian's arrived at the end of the line and Sebastian is here to change poor old Blaine's mind. Both of them look like they're feeling just fine. But they're still hurting. Seblaine friendship.
Characters: Blaine, Sebastian.
Warnings: Swearing
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters – they belong to RIB. The song "Still Hurting" from The Last Five Years belongs to Jason Robert Brown. The song "I Heard Your Voice in a Dream" from SMASH belongs to the SMASH writers.
A/N: I've wanted to write this for a few weeks and with Still Hurting stuck in my head all day I figured why not. Just a little oneshot with my two favourite Glee boys. Enjoy :)
…
STILL HURTING
Blaine breathed in and looked around the empty auditorium. Being back at McKinley felt wrong. He'd come so far only to end up back here? He was supposed to be getting married. He was supposed to be the top of his class at NYADA. But he was back in his high school auditorium. Alone.
Sitting at the piano, he smoothed his fingers over the cold keys and began to tap out notes. A song awakened in his mind and he swung his legs over the piano stool before he began to play. The chords flowed like liquid from his fingertips before he began to sing.
"Jamie is over and Jamie is gone.
Jamie's decided it's time to move on.
Jamie has new dreams he's building upon,
And I'm still hurting.
"Jamie arrived at the end of the line.
Jamie's convinced that the problems are mine.
Jamie is probably feeling just fine,
And I'm still hurting.
"What about lies, Jamie?
What about things that you swore to be true?
What about you, Jamie?
What about you?
"Jamie is sure something wonderful died.
Jamie decides it's his right to decide.
Jamie has secrets he doesn't confide,
And I'm still hurting.
"Go and hide and run away!
Run away,
Run and find something better!
Go and ride the sun away!
Run away, like it's simple,
Like it's right...
"Give me a day, Jamie!
Bring back the lies,
Hang them back on the wall!
Maybe I'd see
How you could be
So certain that we
Had no chance at all.
"Jamie is over and where can I turn?
Covered with scars I did nothing to earn?
Maybe there's somewhere a lesson to learn,
But that wouldn't change the fact,
That wouldn't speed the time,
Once the foundation's cracked
And I'm
Still Hurting."
"Jeeze Anderson, when did you get so sappy?"
Blaine frowned and looked out into the empty theatre. Standing behind the first bank of seats was Sebastian Smythe. His hair was longer and he looked strange in jeans and a t-shirt instead of his Dalton uniform. Hands in pockets, he strode up onto the stage. Blaine got to his feet and crossed over to him.
"What are you doing here?" Blaine asked.
"I could ask you the same thing." Sebastian reached out and straightened Blaine's collar. "No bow tie?"
"Didn't feel like it today. How did you know I'd be here?"
"Took a chance. But seriously, that song was the most depressing thing I've ever heard and I managed to get my hands on a recording of your rendition of 'Cough Syrup' by Young the Giant."
Blaine frowned. "How?"
"Not important. Heard you broke up with Kurt. What happened?"
"I was late to dinner."
"Seriously?"
"Or something like that." Blaine shook his head and started to walk away. "I can't talk to you right now, Sebastian. I need to – be somewhere else."
"I'm not here to get into your pants, Blaine," he said with a sigh. "I'm here to help."
Blaine stopped at the top of the stairs that led down from the stage. "You can't help. No one can."
"Anderson, I'm not screwing around here. I don't want to win you over and I don't want to sleep with you. I just want to know that you're gonna be okay. You've helped me now let me help you."
Frowning, Blaine turned back to Sebastian. "How did I help you?"
Sebastian forced a laugh. "I nearly blinded you and you forgave me. If that's not helping someone, I don't know what is." He skated his foot over the stage and shrugged. "I did love you. In my own fucked up way."
A small smile graced Blaine's lips. "I know. I saw it when you apologised to me."
"Do you wanna get dinner?"
"Sure."
Blaine drove them to Breadstix where they got a booth and Blaine ordered spaghetti and meatballs. Sebastian tried to order a scotch on the rocks but being the middle of the day, he was turned down. He settled for a coffee and a blueberry muffin.
"This is way too much like a date for me," Sebastian muttered as he shifted in his seat. "Isn't this where Hummel asked you to prom?"
"Deal with it, Sebastian. I haven't eaten since I got in."
"So you only got back today?"
"Yeah. This morning."
"And the first place you went was your poor excuse for a high school? There's something wrong with that, dude."
"Where would you have gone? I don't think Scandals is open this early in the day."
"It is. Totally dead but it's open. I woke up in the bathroom there at eleven in the morning once."
Blaine shook his head. "What are you doing these days, Seb? I would've thought you'd be at some Ivy League school spreading diseases like they were test answers."
"I got into Harvard and Dartmouth thanks to my dad. But I didn't wanna go. I've been helping out at Dalton. After that drug scandal with Hunter, the Dean decided the Warblers needed a director so I've been standing in while they look for someone."
"They trust you with that?"
Sebastian shrugged. "They trust that my parents will continue donating exponential amounts of money to the school so long as I'm employed. I haven't made anyone cry. This week." He took a sip of his coffee before he nodded to Blaine. "You should apply. They still sing your praises. I'm pretty sure they asked for a "Blaine Anderson-esque showmanship in the application criteria."
Blaine blushed and shook his head. "No, I can't run away to Dalton again. I'll be fine on my own."
"It's not running if there's no one chasing you. Come with me to practice this afternoon. See how you like it."
Sighing, Blaine gave in. "Fine. But if I don't want to apply after today, you drop it."
Sebastian smirked and nodded. "Deal."
Blaine had been staring at the couch for ten minutes. Warblers had filed into the room and taken their perches around him but he couldn't move his eyes from the couch. The couch where he'd sat and listened to Kurt sing and realised that he was in love with him.
"You okay, Blaine?" Sebastian asked when he came back, a stack of sheet music under his arm.
"Yeah, I'm fine."
Sebastian handed him a page. "You know that song?"
"Yeah."
"Sing lead. Show 'em how it's done."
"Seb, I'm not here to sing."
"You're always here to sing. Give it a go."
Blaine sighed and looked over the page, familiarising himself with the harmonies, while Sebastian organised the Warblers.
Sebastian introduced Blaine when he got to his feet to join them. "And I want you all to give a warm welcome to potential new director of the Warblers and alumnus of Dalton Academy, Blaine Warbler."
The Warblers applauded and Blaine nodded. "Thank you for having me."
"Blaine's gonna sing lead for us today and show you all how we used to do it back in the day. And I'll warn you ahead of time – he has a bad habit of climbing on furniture while he sings so, y'know, mind your fingers." Sebastian gestured to Blaine. "When you're ready."
Blaine nodded and looked down at the lyrics. Sebastian counted him in before he began to sing.
"I thought I was hopeless, I thought I was broken
I struggled to laugh when the whole room was joking
I'd wait in the cold, but the door wouldn't open 'til I
'Til I heard your voice in a dream.
"And nothing comes easy when everyone's rushing
The signal's got speed but there's no real connection
I tried reaching out, it was just my reflection 'til I
'Til I heard your voice in a dream."
Blaine climbed up onto one of the tables, ignoring the confused expressions on the Warblers' faces as he continued. He didn't meet Sebastian's eyes but he could feel the man's gaze following his every move.
"So sing to me and I will forgive you
For taking my heart in the suitcase you packed
Sing to me like the lights didn't blind you
Like you blinded me when I heard your voice in a dream.
"And I could have loved you but you had the hunger
For life in the lights, so when they called your number
I couldn't compete with the spell you were under
Still I, I hear your voice in my dreams."
Blaine looked to Sebastian and his chest started to ache. He needed to be held and to be told it was going to be okay. He needed to know it was okay to feel this way.
"So sing to me and I will forgive you
For taking my heart in the suitcase you packed
Sing to me like the lights didn't blind you
Like you blinded me when I heard your voice in a dream."
Blaine climbed down from the table and strode over to Sebastian. The Warblers ooh-ed around them as Blaine circled Sebastian, the boy's smirk trying to hide the uncertainty in his eyes. Blaine opened his mouth to sing the next line but Sebastian sang instead, tears brimming in his eyes.
"I thought I could love you but you had the hunger."
Blaine jumped in before Sebastian could keep going.
"Oh, and nothing comes easy when everyone's rushing
I thought I could love you."
Sebastian finished the song. "I thought I could love you."
Blaine leaned up to kiss Sebastian but the boy pushed him back.
"We're done for the day, Warblers. Get out."
One student went to ask why but was pulled away by his friend. The senior commons were soon empty and went Sebastian's hand fell away Blaine tried to kiss him again. Sebastian ducked out of the way and shook his head.
"No, Blaine. You belong to Kurt."
"I don't belong to anyone."
"And you certainly don't belong to me." Sebastian grasped Blaine's shoulder and looked into his eyes. "Don't screw this up, Blaine. Don't screw it up like I screwed it up with you. Find Kurt and tell him that you're sorry and that you'll do whatever it takes to make you both happy. Because that's what you deserve. And I can't give that to you."
"You don't know that."
Sebastian brushed a finger under Blaine's left eye. "Yes I do. I would have crossed the seas for you but instead I threw it in your face. Kurt will never hurt you the way I would."
"I want to help you."
Sebastian forced a smile. "I know you do. And you will. But not by trying to be my boyfriend. Just be my friend, Blaine. That's all I need. That's what we both need."
Blaine hugged Sebastian, his head resting over the boy's beating heart. "You're a smart one, Sebastian Smythe."
He laughed and hugged Blaine back. "And you're the sweetest person I've ever met, Blaine Anderson."
Blaine wasn't sure how long they stayed like that but when they pulled away, he felt better. He was still hurting but he was going to be okay. And so was Sebastian.
…
A/N: That changed direction like three times. But I like it. I hope you do too. And if you still have hope for Klaine, go check out my current WIP "Echoes and Illusions". Blaine is a blind prince trying to find a way to heal his sight when he meets Kurt in an enchanted forest. Kurt sees so much he can't tell what's real anymore and he wants nothing more than to be rid of the delusions that are making his life fall apart. Love and adventure ensue. Be sure to have a look at it and to let me know what you think of this. Thanks for reading – Em xo