Elsa walked towards the door, concentrating on keeping her royal poise.
"What did I ever do to you?" cried Anna.
"Enough, Anna" launched Elsa over her shoulder. That was a mistake, it gave her a glimpse of her sister, gesticulating with her glove in her hand.
"No, why? Why do you shut me out?" shouted Anna.
Elsa hurried to the door, trying not to hear her sister, not to her words touch her, not to feel the hurt in her voice. Conceal, don't feel.
"Why do you shut the world out?"
She felt sorrow and anger fight inside her. It was unfair. She should not be called out on doing her best to protect people, to protect Anna, at the price of her loneliness. The door was close. Only a few steps, now. Conceal, don't feel.
"What are you so afraid of?"
This was too much. She felt the wave of anger sweep over her. I'm afraid of hurting you! Can't you understand that? She opened her mouth to shout, turning around to silence her sister with a gesture.
"I said…"
She felt it just in time. That familiar tingle, not displeasing in itself, but which she had come to dread because of what it meant, of what its consequences would be, especially here. She felt the ice push under her exposed fingers, the cold rising inside her, ready to engulf her as in that vision the old troll had conjured in the sky many years ago and that she had never managed to push out of her mind.
Elsa clasped her hand against her, trying desperately to contain the burst of ice that she felt ready to escape. She knew the fight was hopeless, that there was no way she would be able to prevent the frost to form around her, here, in front of everyone. She desperately clenched her exposed left fist, wrapping it with her still gloved right hand, huddling inside her royal cloak, attempting to delay the inevitable. She was at an arm's reach from the door now, but it may as well have been miles away. Even a simple step would probably unleash her dreaded powers and freeze half the room.
Conceal, don't feel. Not now, please, not here. Conceal don't feel, conceal don't feel.
Looking down, Elsa saw with horror a patch of ice appearing under her feet, growing, spreading. She heard a creaking sound above her, and suspected that some ice was now forming on the ceiling as well. At least, it was not on the ground, but this was only a small respite. The ice had found a way, like it always did, it would keep pushing out of her now, it was only a matter of seconds before someone noticed...
"Elsa, are you all right?"
Anna's compassionate voice cut through the storm in her head like boiling water poured over fresh snow. It was uncomfortably close, right behind her, in harm's way… but it was also devoid of the anger and hurt that she had been carrying only a moment ago. Elsa could not help feeling a pang of relief upon hearing it.
Go away, Anna, don't stay here, I'll hurt you, I can't control it, please, Anna, go away…
"Listen, uh, I'm sorry if I upset you. I should not have shouted at you. Um, sorry. Here, you can take your glove, I did not want to shout, I'm sorry…"
Whirling around, Elsa snatched the glove from Anna's hand, surprising her sister who leapt backward in shock. Good, stay away from me. She had been far too close indeed. Elsa struggled to put on her glove, trying to regain her composure as she felt the familiar fabric encase her hand again, containing her, protecting those around her. She glimpsed Anna shivering and noticed that the breaths of the guests had all turned into little steamy clouds.
I have to get out of here, they will notice, they will know....
"I'm sorry, Elsa, I should not have shouted, I did not want to upset you. Just… please, Elsa. Ok, I, I got it, you don't want to see me any more, but please just let me be happy this one time, I won't bother you ever again after that, I promise, please, Elsa, I beg you…"
Elsa could still feel her heart pounding in her chest, and the dread she had felt when she thought her powers would be unleashed here, in front of everyone, was still there, assaulting her mind. She looked into her sister's pleading eyes and realised she felt too drained to fight now. She knew she should flee, go back to her room, take the time to find her confidence back, but her sister was here, still asking, pleading, with tears in her eyes, and now she felt unable to leave her so quickly.
"Elsa, are you all right?" There had been only concern in Anna's voice, as if she was the one fearing to harm her…
Elsa bowed her head down, hating her weakness. Don't do it! Leave now!
"Fine", she whispered.
"Just this time, please, I won't ask you any… wait, what?"
"I consent. Marry him, be happy."
"Oh thank you, thank you Elsa! I'm sorry I shouted, thank you!"
Anna looked as if she was about to hug her. Elsa took a step backward, defensively raising her hands, conjuring a small smile.
"Thank you, your Majesty", said Hans, appearing at Anna's side, smiling. She noted how close his expression was to her sister's. As if they really were kindred spirits.
Or as if he was… following a cue.
Elsa nodded, then quickly turned around and crossed the door, feeling relief as she heard it slam behind her. As she hurried along the empty corridors to the safety of her room, she wondered if she had not just put Anna in a greater danger as if she had let her hug her.
Author's Notes: This story has been kicking around in my head since I've watched Frozen. Since it's my first fic, I have refrained from writing something too ambitious so the story will span over more or less the same timeframe as the movie. And I will not try to aim at something 100% realistic.
Hope you enjoy it!