Honor Bound

            By Sithari aka Damocles32

            A short Female Reven/Juhani romance. I wrote in between working on my "What If" fiction. Takes place post KOTOR.

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            I walked alone through the lavish corridor, my footsteps falling silently on the carpeted floor. The Sheldon Hotel was one of the most exquisite and expensive locals Courisant had to offer. Nobles, Diplomats, Businessmen, even Senators would take up residence within it's glamorous halls during their long ventures away from home. The upper tiers were restricted to distinguished guests and royalty, leaving them blissfully free of the usual crowds that plagued the rest of the city.

            I approached the suite at the end of the hall. Two battle-droid sentinels stationed on either side of the door served both as protection and deterrent, should anyone think of trying to harm the most famous person in the galaxy. As I grew near, the droid on the right scanned me for any weapons I might be hiding on or in my person. Finding none, it spoke.

            "No offensive weaponry detected. As a member of the Ebon Hawks crew, you are free to enter with permission from her honor. One moment."

            The droid tipped its head back, scanning through a list of persons with Reven's personal permission to enter. After a few seconds, the droid lowered his head and looked at me.

            "Reven has decreed you may come and go as you please."

            With that, the door behind it slid open, bidding my entry. The room beyond was dark. Darker than I would have expected. It was worrisome, perhaps, but not unexpected. She'd been through a lot. As I stepped inside the door slid shut behind me. Standard security precaution, but it chilled me, nonetheless. It was like I was walking into a tomb. Despite the darkness, I could see her clearly, illuminated by the moonlight. She sat in the corner, looking down at something in her hands. She twirled it slowly, it's silver lining flashing every so often. A light saber hilt.

            It was not her own.

            I stood, immobile, watching her. To this day, try as I might, I cannot describe what she looked like in that moment. The look on her face, the glint of the hilt as she turned it gently in her hands, the way the fading moonlight glistened off her hair. It was at that moment that I believe I truly fell in love with her.

            She looked up at me, and, for the first time since I watched her enter the Star Forge, she smiled.

            "Hey Juhani."

Her voice cracked, and, for the first time, I noticed the clear streaks that ran under eyes.

            She had been crying.

            Reven stood, tossing the hilt dejectedly onto the bed. Another act of practiced bravado. I saw through it and, deep down, I think she knew I would. She had been my rock. My shield. She had protected me when I needed it most, she supported me when no one else would, saved me more times and in more ways then I could count… but now, it was she who needed me.

            "It's still troubling you, isn't it?"

            Reven turned to look out the window, placing one of her gloved hands on the glass. Her voice was soft, maybe a bit wounded.

            "Yes."

            I moved to her side, trying to think of something, anything, that would make her feel better, maybe ease the pain a little.

            "There was nothing you could do, Reven. You tried everything you could to save her. More than most would have, I think."

Reven looked up, watching the stars shine over the city.

            "It's just… I… I could have saved her… I know I could have."

"Do you really believe that?"

            Reven paused, thinking it over in her head.

            "I don't think it matters what I really believe. I'll always tell myself I could've saved her… if I had just done something different."

            Reven let her hand slide down the glass, making a dejected squeak as it did so.

            "She saved me, Juhani. I just wish I could have returned the favor."

            "You did, Reven."

            Reven turned to me, her face echoing wordless confusion.

            "You saved me."

            Her eyes… those deep, beautiful brown eyes… softened, as she looked into my own.

            "Juhani…"

            "I never did say it… when we were on the temple summit, I mean."

            Reven drew closer, almost touching me. My heart quickened as she did.

            "You didn't have to, Juhani… I think we've gone beyond that."

            "No… It needs to be said… even if only so I can prove to myself that it is true."

            I wrapped my arms around her waist, my heart almost bursting as she did the same. I knew then that this is what I wanted. Regardless of what the others might think. Regardless of the Council and their views. Deep in my heart, I knew this is what I wanted since the day she rescued me on Taris. Even a Jedi, it seems, cannot control the feelings of the heart.

            "I love you, Reven."