Author Note: This originally started out as something I wrote for another story but it just wouldn't fit. Instead it's the start of its own story.
Disclaimer: The story is mine but the characters aren't. Though occasionally they may do things you might not consider Canon.
Warnings before you begin:
I write wall to wall angst, so if you don't like angst, you probably want to walk away from this story now.
This story has Jane and Maura in it in some form or another, but that does not mean it will be Rizzles. If you're not prepared to read about Jane hooking up with someone else, you probably want to walk away now.
Jane fell back onto the mattress, her heartbeat thumping in her ears and her breathing laboured. She closed her eyes and listened to her partner's equally harried breath.
"Wanna go again?" she asked, sliding a hand along Jane's pale white abdomen and up across her bare breasts. She inhaled, a shiver travelled down through her body as the hand slid back down between her legs.
"Wait," Jane said, her rasping voice worse than usual. She held the woman's hand against her thigh. As much as she wanted to recover that quickly, she couldn't. When her heartbeat slowed a little, she rolled onto her side, forcing the woman's hand away, and ran her own fingers along her ankle and on up to the top of her thigh.
"Oh God," the woman said, purring softly as Jane moved her hand across her upper thigh. She replaced her fingers with her tongue and pressed chaste kissed along her skin, up across her abdomen, briefly against the mound of her breast before her lips met the woman's. She slid her fingers back down between her thighs.
Jane closed her eyes and thrust her whole body forwards with each careful action, Maura's face danced across the back of her eyelids. She moaned against her partner's ear. It took every ounce of restraint not to whisper Maura's name. Eventually, she collapsed on top of the woman, their bodies held together, Jane's hand still resting between her soft, brown legs. Exhaustion held her there, gasping for breath. When she opened her eyes, the usual wave of disappointment settled on her chest.
"You tell anyone about this and I'll shoot you," she said, rolling onto her back again.
"You say that every time," Nina said, turning onto her side and placing an arm across Jane's chest.
"Yeah, well, I mean it every time."
Nina stared up at her, her dark brown eyes were full of questions, of curiosity. She ignored her and closed her eyes.
"We've been doing this for months," Nina said, resting her chin against Jane's shoulder.
"So?"
"Eventually you're going to have to decide if this is just a bit of fun, or if there's something more to it."
"There's not." Jane stared at the ceiling, pursing her lips.
"I'm not stupid, Jane. My IQ is borderline genius." She traced circles on Jane's shoulderblade with her fingertip. "You're in love with Maura."
"No," Jane said, her voice absent of tone.
"You're devastated that she's gone. That drunken night out a few month ago, you were trying to forget that she left you."
"Shut up," Jane said, turning over, away from Nina. A lump settled in the back of her throat. She fought against the urge to cry.
"I'm right," she said. "You're doing this because you can't be with her."
"You don't know what you're talking about."
"I watch you. When I look at you, you close your eyes."
Jane slipped away from Nina's touch and out of the bed. "People close their eyes."
"People don't moan someone else's name when they're sleeping," Nina sat up as she spoke.
"I don't."
Standing by the window, Jane separated the drapes wide enough to glance out at the night. She brushed tears from her cheek and gripped the fabric in front of her.
"You do."
Nina placed a hand on Jane's shoulder, making her jump. She turned. Eyes fixed on her. Her small brown fingers cupped Jane's face, holding her steady. Forcing her to look into her eyes. Jane lowered her gaze.
"I'm not saying we can't hang out," Nina said. "I've not felt ready for a relationship since my fiancé died. I'm not looking for commitment, Jane. I just want you to be honest with me."
"You're wrong," she said, tugging at her wrists until Nina lowered her hands and stepped away.
"I guess this was the last time we're going to hang out." She picked up her bra and clasped it back into place.
"Okay." Jane didn't want that. She wanted Maura, but that was impossible. "I think about her. I want to be there in the moment, but I'm not."
"Good," Nina said, pulling her underwear on and walking back towards the bed. "I'm not there either."
"You're not?" Jane sat down. She swallowed down the desire to cry.
"I've had my eye on Debbie, she works beat. I just can't face a relationship right now." Nina laughed and slumped down beside her, stealing a kiss. She ran a finger along Jane's bottom lip. "When you kissed me, I figured what the hell. Might as well have some fun while I get over it."
"Can we stop talking now?" Jane asked, pushing Nina back against the bed. She slipped her hand into the side of Nina underwear and pulled it down.
"Again?"
"You made me think about Maura," she said, pushing her tongue into Nina's mouth.
In the morning, Jane's cell phone pulled her out of her dreams. She fumbled in the darkness, her hand colliding with naked breast before she stretched across Nina's body to her phone.
"Hello?" she said, then opened her eyes wider and sat up straight. "Rizzoli."
The body was across town in a dumpster. Jane watched from the sideline whilst a couple of uniformed officers carried the young woman to the ground. Doctor Pike walked around the body.
"Like I said when she was in the trash, I don't think this was a deliberate act."
"Are you serious?" Jane asked, rolling her eyes. "She has fresh needle marks between her toes. She has a crushed skull. We found two empty syringes with one set of prints on them that do not match the victims."
"On the other side of the alley," Doctor Pike said.
Jane folded her arms. "Are you always this stupid?"
"Detective Korsak," Pike said, holding a hand up as Korsak turned his attention away from the crime scene. "Are you going to let your subordinate speak to me like that or am I going to have to report her?"
"Take a break, Jane," he said, placing a hand on her arm and turning her away.
"Are you serious? Korsak!" Jane said, walking on ahead of him. "He's useless. He doesn't know what the hell he's doing."
"That may be so," said Korsak, stopping in front of her. "But he is the Chief Medical Examiner, whether you agree with him or not, you know how this works. Show him some respect."
"Why should I? He doesn't respect us. He certainly doesn't respect the people he's supposed to look out for." Jane kicked a garbage bag on her way out of the alley. "If he doesn't do his job, we have nothing to go off."
"You've been erratic since Maura left. I'm not going to pretend I know how you feel, but if you don't get yourself together soon you're going to be up in front of the sergeant."
"Can we request another medical examiner come and examine the body?"
"I'll ask that Susie ensure all bases are covered before Doctor Pike reaches his final conclusion," Korsak said. "Now go back to HQ and help Nina look through the CCTV."
"Why can't Frankie do it?"
Korsak shook his head. "I asked you, and as Doctor Pike pointed out, I'm still your superior, now go."
"Yes, Sir," she said, raising two fingers to her forehead and saluting him. Korsak smiled before returning to the alley.
Back at the headquarters, Jane entered the room where Nina was going through the CCTV footage. She glanced at the other desks, through the window at the half empty office, then closed the blinds and turned the lock on the back of the door.
"What are you doing?" Nina asked, standing up.
"Don't talk," Jane said, closing the gap. She slipped a hand into the back of Nina's trousers and smashed her lips against Nina's. She rested her other hand on Nina's covered breast, pressing it beneath her fingers as their tongues danced between their mouths.
"Hold it," Nina said, pushing her backwards. "Whilst I like the idea of doing this here, nobody at work knows I'm bisexual and from all of your threats, I assume you don't want them to know you're...whatever you are. So how about we put the fingers and tongues away and just do some work?"
Jane shook her head and kissed her again. She unbuttoned Nina's pants. She waited for her resistance, she waited for her to tell her not to. Instead, Nina gripped her hand and slid it under the band of her underwear.
As Nina let out a soft moan, Jane covered her mouth with her hand, provoking Nina to thrust her hips harder against Jane's fingers. When the moment was over, Jane pulled her hand away.
"This is never going to happen again," she said, buttoning Nina's pants back up and placing a brief kiss on her lips.
"Don't you want me to return the favour?" Nina shrugged.
"Not here," Jane said, unlocking the door.
Nina grinned. "So it can happen again?"
Jane opened the blinds and reached for the door handle. "Not like this."
"Can it happen like his at home?"
"Look forward to it," Jane said, smirking before walking out of the room.
Author Note: Yes. Jane and Nina.