Disclaimer: I don't own any rights to Torchwood
Summary:
Here I am. I've seen the turn of two centuries. Made it into the millennium. I've been places that you could never imagine; I've seen things you would never believe and I've met people who I could never forget. I mustn't forget anything. We forget because we have to and we remember because we need to. I remember every face throughout the years, every pair of lips that I've kissed, every pair of eyes that I've gazed into and every heart that I've broken. But I have a curse I live on whilst I watch you grow old and die. I've seen friends, lovers and family slip away into the darkness whilst I stay and mourn you for all these years. I am wrong and I can never be fixed and that is why I must stay and protect those who I love. I must stay strong and I must never forget, I will keep waiting for a doctor to come from out of the darkness, for a lover to take my heart and for a friend to share my soul. I will keep waiting and protecting for all time because that is what I am here for and that's the only way I can cope. I was lost in the darkness and then I found purpose but it comes with a cost. Every time I come back from the dead the pain rips through me but I must hang on. Being alive for so long you don't notice the things you used to all those centuries ago. The sun is never as warm, the breeze is never as fresh, the laughter isn't as pure, and the flowers are never as colourful. But do not mistake me for one wallowing in self pity because there are some things in the world that stay the same throughout the years. The pure soul of a human. Who needs the breeze or the sun when you have people who care about each other so much that they would risk life and limb for each other? That's human spirit for you and Torchwood has bags of it. Owen- the valiant doctor, arrogant and spiteful at times. I gave you purpose and you gave me hope. Toshiko-the genius locked away for so long. You work so hard and you taught me to care about another human being. I pulled you from the darkness but you pulled the darkness out of my soul. Gwen- the heart and the soul. You taught me to care about society not just save it. You keep us level and on track and then there's Ianto-You taught me to love again, you made the sun feel warm and the breeze feel fresh. You made an old heart beat faster again and make me feel breathless when you smile at me. I will never forget and it's my team that make a little flicker of light in the darkness grow bolder and bolder. Because as long as there's that glimmer of light isn't that always worth grabbing not with both hands? So you have to take it no matter what your head says because after a while you will forget and you have to keep remembering and piecing things together and make connections because then the world will seem a bit less dark because you see all your loved ones around you and you remember all the laughter and love you felt and feel. Throughout all my years I have met true friends, lover, enemies and a doctor but the light has never faded. We forget because we can but we remember because we must.