i know i don't have to, but i want to because i am obsessive-compulsive other than being clinically insane.
Seed's acting a little OOC in this one, so i hope none of you mind... R&R please, but no flames. ^_^ this fanfic goes out to all Seed & Culgan fans, whether yaoi or not.


autumn skies


The Highland had always been a beautiful place, one of rugged beauty and free, wild spirits. Because of the harsh conditions and because it was the northernmost location in the world, not many people had chosen to make the Highland their home... thus, nature ran widespread and virtually untouched by the all-consuming fire of mankind.
L'Renouille was surrounded by rolling hills and virgin forests; it sat upon a plateau overlooking a vast stretch of prairie field and against the majestic peaks of the Highland mountains. Around the glorious capital were higher but no less gentle plateaus that offered perfect views of it and it's other surroundings.

Culgan sat alone upon the grass on one such plateau, watching L'Renouille and the flurry of activity around the pristine stronghold. It was a chilly morning, but he barely noticed the cold. Instead, he contemplated upon the brilliant flashes of red and gold mixed in with the scintillating green of the leaves in the trees. Summer was coming to pass, and still the bitter war the Highland fought against the former City States raged on. He had once been almost certain of the fact that the war would last well over a year; he had been right.
Luca Blight's very recent death at the hands of Syujinkou and the Kismet Army had brought about alot of changes in the Highland Army. Jillia Blight had been wedded to Jowy, thus making Jowy the King of Highland and general of the Highland forces. Jowy's tactics and motives were certainly different from both Agares and Luca, but they were just as effective as those of his predecessors; perhaps they were even more effecient in more ways then one.
After finally managing to complete his tasks for that week, Culgan had decided upon slowing things down and taking some time for himself before the tides of war swelled once again. Moments like those were a rarity at present, and Culgan's more cynical side was telling him that it would probably be his last if things got worse.
With such a dark outlook on life, one would think that Culgan would have liked to spend it with decent company instead of mulling over the world's woes in solitude. In truth, the white-haired general had been planning to invite a certain someone in particular to join him...
The sight of a situation Culgan considered himself lucky to behold made the man change his mind.

On his way through L'Renouille's gates, before the splendid fountain that marked the center of the castle's front gardens. Culgan had found Seed sitting at that fountain, surrounded by little children.
The red-haired young man's face was happy... truly happy. Seed always had a grin on his face to his colleagues, but Culgan could tell that that was but a mask. That moment had been the first time that Culgan had truly seen Seed happy. The children around Seed were the ones Culgan had recognized as the kids at L'Renouille's orphanage.
Seed had been an orphan of the first war. He had been raised in that same orphanage. Unknown to all but Culgan, Seed not only fought for the Highland but for those children, to glorify their land and build a new and better world for them to live and grow up in.
Culgan had caught this moment unnoticed, and he had slipped away unnoticed. The image of Seed horsing around with those little boys and listening to normally timid girls chattering away burned in his mind. Unlike Seed, Culgan had never had anything like that in his life.
That left Culgan with the question of why he was really fighting in the first place.

The familiarity of the presence that entered Culgan's awareness prevented the silver-haired man from drawing his sword. He did not bother to turn and greet Seed as the latter came into the little spot on light feet and seat himself on the ground with a wistful--yet somehow satisfied--sigh.
"I thought I'd join you. We've both finished our assignments for King Jowy after all." Seed lay back against the soft grass, folding his arms behind his head and staring up at the sky. "Damn, the weather's nice today..."
"No kidding." Culgan propped his arms over his knees and leaned forward, his restless eyes attempting to follow what little movement they could spot from within L'Renouille's pristine walls.
"I sometimes wonder why the sky seems so high to us," Seed mused. "There are times when it feels as though I can reach out and touch it, but there are other times when it seems so far away..."
Culgan blinked, glancing at Seed curiously. Seed barely noticed him; the red-haired general was too busy gazing up at the clouds. The youth had never been this quiet or solemn before.

"You saw me, didn't you, Culgan?" the question was very simple. It was one that no average man would want to lie to.
"Yes, I did. Those children looked overjoyed to see you."
Seed's eyes softened, his expression becoming wistful. "Did they?" he whispered, so softly that Culgan almost thought he imagined it. "There are times when I'm not sure how real emotion looks, much less feels like anymore."
Culgan didn't respond. He didn't like having to hear something like this coming from Seed, of all people. Luca and Solon Jhee he'd expect, but... not Seed.
Bitterly, Seed gave a laugh. "Sorry, Culgan. It isn't like me to be this depressed, huh?" the younger general's grin was weak-hearted.

Instead of verbally responding, Culgan sat up, leaning his arms upon his knees and staring off towards L'Renouille. "What does this war mean to you, Seed?" he asked in his typically quiet tone. He turned his head to meet with Seed's gaze, pale blue against crimson. "Why do you fight?"
Seed's brow furrowed as he sat up also. "What do you mean? You know damned well why I fight, Culgan. I want to give those kids a home. They don't deserve to be out on the streets."
"That isn't what I mean. What does this fight mean to you?"
Seed opened his mouth to respond, but no words came out. Culgan continued to watch him, virtually expressionless. The autumn breeze whispered in their direction, stirring through the fiery canopies of the trees and coaxing leaves to dance into the air.
The silence came, summoned to the moment subconsciously by the two speakers.

"I... I don't know." Seed turned away, the look in his eyes haunted. "I just don't know anymore." he gazed down at his outstretched gloved hand, flexing it thoughtfully. "For as far back as I can remember, I've always told myself that I'm doing it for them... I'm killing, I'm sacrificing, I'm crying these tears, I'm shedding this blood on my hands... for them."
"Somewhere along the line, you forgot about yourself."
"Yeah, somewhere along the line I must've," Seed mumbled, his expression growing sad. He chuckled out of the blue, smiling resignedly. "But it doesn't matter anymore. If I keep this up," he said solemnly, "they won't have to do the same thing I did. That's all that matters to me."
For a long time, Culgan did not speak. He turned back to L'Renouille in the distance.

The silver-haired man rose to his feet, catching Seed's attention.
The expression upon his face did not change. "Never forget, Seed," he said, at long last. "Don't make the same mistake I did. Fight this war, not just for those children, but for your own soul."
With that, he turned and left Seed to his own thoughts.


e n d .