My friends on the Rooftop will know I have an obsession with Petruchio and Kate, from the BBC production SHAKESPEARE RETOLD: TAMING OF THE SHREW, modern day adaptation by Sally Wainwright.

I have written several stories exploring their characters and life. In Chronological order this is the first. Some of the dialogue is lifted directly from Sally Wainwright's script but as my stories are based on her version of TOTS, I felt this was necessary and I hope she will forgive the liberty I have taken.

I have put in things for which there are no basis but which I hope may explain the damage to Kate and Petruchio. Otherwise they might just seem like monsters.

As I wrote these stories I was seeing the actors who brought the characters to glorious life:

RUFUS SEWELL and SHIRLEY HENDERSON

My thanks to them and to Sally but the ultimate credit goes, of course, to WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE.

With my stories I like to include a song which flows with it.

The song I feel that goes with this is" The Nearness of You" sung by Tom Jones.

To me it describes exactly Petruchio falling in love with Kate.

"It's not the pale moon that excites me,

That thrills and delights me.

Oh no, it's just the nearness of you.

It isn't your sweet conversation

That brings this sensation.

Oh no, it just the nearness of you .

When I'm in your arms

And I feel you so close to me,

All my wildest dreams come true.

I need no soft lights to enchant me,

if you'll only grant me

The right to hold you ever so tight

And to feel in the night

The nearness of you."

THE TAMING OF THE SHREW

MEETING HER

He had gone to Australia to try and clear his debts with the Inland Revenue, had saved some cash before the Immigration authorities had found him and deported him.

No work permit!

And they had claimed a large part of what he had saved to pay for his fare back.

Just before he left, his father's solicitors had contacted to let him know Dad had died. Well, he would cope with that later and shutting the door on it in his mind, thought at least he could clear his debts, he could sell the house if necessary .

Then the blow... Dad had left no cash and the Inland Revenue were demanding death duties on top of what he already owed, not only that, threatening to take him to court on bankruptcy charges.

He always thought he didn't care about the house, ancestors and all that rubbish but he found he did. Now, he was the last of his family, well... things appeared differently.

He cared very much!

Last of his family... Only child of an only child of an only child whose father and uncles had died in the Great War.

No father, no mother, no grandparents, no aunts, no uncles, no cousins,...poor bastard.

Well that was enough of that.

Don't let the buggers grind you down and never let them know you care.

He had had plenty of time on the long journey home to think about what he could do and a brilliant thought struck him, or so it seemed after a couple of drinks. He could marry money, at least it amused him for a while.

When he had learnt just how black things were, the revenue were about to possess the house to pay back taxes and death duties. The old man's solicitor had said in fun, " Well in cases like this, your forebears married money. " and he had smiled grimly.

"Your father had shut up the house. He said, it seemed sensible when there was only him. He took a flat near the hospital. The lease is almost up and you will have to clear it out. I have done as much I can but there is a lot of personal things which need to seen to. You will have to. And you will have to think seriously about what you are going to do. I'm sorry."

He left the offices and felt in need of a few stiff drinks and then later, through the bleariness of several whiskies, thought he would dump himself on Harry.

Harry, his best mate from sixth form through Uni, they had got drunk together, had cried on each other's shoulder. Wasn't Harry's tart a top model or something, didn't know quite what, always tried to steer clear of her, if he could. ...who knows, perhaps she might know someone.

When he eventually roused him, Harry had had a bad night ... hangover .

Harry's reaction to his idea was not encouraging.

"What for?"

"Money ! Anybody will do as long as she got money. "

No, he didn't know anybody rich who wanted to get married but there was sly smirk on his face.

"God! I've got to lie down and then I can think" he said.

They went out to eat, at least he did, Harry was not so enthusiastic.

Then Harry told him about his girlfriend's dumping of him.

"I'll get married when Katherine does." she had said.

"Who's Katherine?"

"Her sister. You know "

"No"

"Yes you do, her on the telly, the MP, she's always in the papers."

"She got money?"

"Yes s'pose so, they've all got money, that family, pots, loads of it. You must know her."

"How can I meet her ?"

"Any...no, wait a minute, no way, don't go there for a single minute... She's a Gorgon, face like a split boot, tongue like...God.. d'you know what she threatened to do to Paxman ?"

and told him graphically.

"But she's got money ... and she wants to get married?"

"I don't know...I suppose so. The Party wants her to, but God, who would have her?" and he whispered furtively,

"She a virgin,... at 38 , a virgin...that's got to tell you something."

"But she wants to get married?"

"NO, I don't know, I suppose so ...NO, don't go down that road. NO."

And so, after 24 hours of this repetitive conversation they were outside Bianca's flat.

"You don't know she's going to be there... the bitch from the black lagoon ...I'm not going to introduce you..."

He just smiled at Harry. It was still a bit of a joke with maybe a nut of truth in there somewhere. A joke, some fun to lighten up things; God knows , they were black enough.

The door was flung open and a miniature tornado swept through and followed by a somewhat larger one down the corridor, where they proceeded to scream at each other. He watched fascinated. He could hear Harry talking to a older woman in the doorway. The taller woman was coming back towards them, he recognised Harry 's woman Bianca, 'the world's most beautiful woman'.

Not in his opinion, too skinny.

Still watching the other one her face contorted with rage, telling them all to go to hell, he said to Harry, " That her ?"

" Mmm."

Then he realised she was going to get in the lift and shot down the corridor. The lift doors were almost closed when he forced his fingers through, opening them and flung himself in before they closed again.

"Kate" he said.

"Katherine" she corrected him disinterestedly, jabbing the lift keys .

"No! Kate. Kate, I like Kate, I prefer Kate. "

"And you are?" she said sweetly, which if he had known her better would have warned him.

She turned her face up to his, a little triangular face with enormous dark velvet eyes and black brows sweeping upwards.

"I am going to marry you" he said and as he did, realised that was what he was going to do, wanted to do.

It was though a great bell clanged in his head or as if he had fallen off a cliff. This was it, what he had been waiting for, and told her this.

"Did my mother put up to this?" she asked suspiciously.

"I don't know your mother."

"That wouldn't stop her."

"No, I mean it. I want marry you."

She was beginning to blow again and called him several choice names ending with a effing lunatic. Then she realised the lift had stopped but the doors hadn't opened.

"The doors have jammed."

"Oh!" he said, leaned across her squeezing her into the corner and poked at them hard, unnecessarily hard. She shoved him hard in a fury.

"Now you buggered it up."

She looked like a tiny furious spitting hissing kitten and he laughed, then said "They told me you were ugly, obnoxious, but you're not, you're fun, you're plucky... ...you're lovely." almost wonderingly to himself, looking down at her.

She was so small, Harry hadn't said, not even reaching his shoulder, alright he was tall, big, broad, hefty even ...she was dainty ... dark hair...and eyes ...beautiful creamy skin... fragile. She was talking to him but he wasn't really listening ...he was looking at her. Looking at her mouth ...God! her mouth was so inviting. A lovely M. She turned to press the alarm button and he saw the curve of her hips, her waist, a waist his hands could span, the swell of her breasts.

And the flicker of desire that had begun in the corridor, grew .

He wanted her.

"Some people might use this as an opportunity to get to know each other better. You know, sex, in a lift, the sort of thing they brag about afterwards. "

She narrowed her eyes.

"Are you threatening me?" she said, softly.

"No I was just talking."

"Well don't! Don't talk lewdly. "

"I wasn't talking lewdly ...I was thinking lewdly... very lewdly. You have no idea how alluring, arousing... enticing you are to a man like me. In fact I could shag you here, here and now! "

And she slapped his face. He caught her wrist and said, "if you do that again, I'll hit you back...harder!" He held her wrist for a moment longer.

She did look exactly like a angry kitten and the thought made him smile again.

"Kate," he said gently lovingly."Kate." and they stared into each other's eyes.

The lift jerked and the doors opened. He was aware of Harry and somebody standing but still didn't stop looking at her.

"This is Kate." he said.

"We've met." Harry said.

"We are going to be married."

"In your dreams, Buster." Kate said and stalked away.

"I'll book the registry office for Saturday ... whatever... I'll be in touch."

"You do that" she said sweetly. Harry watched them both, stupefied.

"Kiss me, Kate" he called after her.

"Drop Dead, Weirdo!" she muttered as she walked through the doors.

He rubbed his hands. Harry, stunned, waited for him to say something else; when nothing was forthcoming, said "You coming up to the party?"

"No. I don't think so, no point now ...not necessary .Think I'll go back, have something to eat and go to bed."

And they went their separate ways.

Back at Harry's flat, he made himself a bacon sarnie, thinking about the evening ...and Kate. He had gone along to this party, more to tease Harry than anything ... well maybe the thought was there that there could be someone, even this woman who so obviously intimidated Harry.

On the plane back he had thought and laughed about marrying for money.

Theoretically, he didn't object, coming from his family, you had to be pragmatic. After all, he was 38 and had been about a bit, had a few girls, quite a few girls but never been in love, no-one who lasted beyond the first couple of months of lust, no-one who interested him that much, never lived with a woman, never wanted to, never met anyone he particularly wanted to marry, so getting married for whatever reasons ( money in his case )did not seem unreasonable.

Until tonight!

He didn't know what he expected from what Harry had said.

A Gorgon, Medusa, "face like a split boot" he had said.

A 7ft, 20 stone, grotesque, foul mouthed monster, perhaps another Ann Widdicombe?

"She's not your type," Harry had said.

What was his type? He had never thought about it till now. He would have said big blondes with big boobs, the bigger the better, and he liked a biggish arse too. Yes, big.

And maybe not too bright.

He had called her Kate, to provoke her, to focus her attention on him, maybe have some fun with her.

What he didn't expect was that he would be drawn after this fireball like a magnet; that she would be this tiny fragile woman with the soft, little girl voice, the prettiest of faces with enormous dark eyes that he felt he could drown in, and her mouth, her mouth that he wanted to kiss, to kiss him .

When she turned and looked at him it was though he had been hit over the head, an almighty CLANG and then he fell off a cliff.

And he knew this was the one, the one he had been waiting for, the one he wanted to marry, spend the rest of his life with, wanted her, to hold, to kiss, to make love to, there and then, in that lift . Then she swore at him and slapped him and everything glittered and sparkled and shone around them, and he knew that fun and laughter, intelligence, and wit, battles of wit. Maybe even just battles, he laughed to himself, were going to be theirs as well .

Kate

He got the pillows and duvet and lay down on Harry's settee and thought about her.

Kate

What was his plan of action? Where would he get hold of her again?

Christ, he should have thought of that.

Relief! No problems. MP. House of Commons. Of course!

Her name!

God what was her name?

He couldn't just ask for Kate.

God, what was it?

The same as Bianca, they were sisters... of course.

Magazine, magazine would have it some where... or somewhere here in Harry's flat. That's it... Minola

He would ring tomorrow ... and gave himself up to thinking about her ... her ... her and him ... lovely lascivious thoughts... lewd, and remembering her reaction in the lift, he laughed to himself, and remembering, felt that surge... God, he had the most enormous hard-on just thinking...about her.

Harry was up and gone before him in the morning.

He had some toast and coffee (ugh! he hated coffee in the mornings but it was all Harry had.)

He thought and planned, worked out what he was going to say.

Meet me for lunch, no ... no money.

Oh, he would think of something when he spoke to her.

In the end, it was nothing like he had planned. He thought he would be passed from one to another till eventually he spoke to her...

Nothing like it.

Got the number from Harry's phone book, left the flat and made his way to Westminster. He rang the House of Commons, asked for Katherine Minola and he was put straight through to her office and some bloke said" Katherine Minola's office" and, deep breath, he asked to speak to her.

"She's on the other line, will you hold? "

"I'm in a phone box."

"Can I take a message?"

"Um ... um... yes... we're having lunch"... Thinking on his feet..."tell her I'll meet her in ... "where ...where

"St James's park by the bandstand ...in about 10 minutes. "

"Who shall I say?"

"She'll know. Tell her... ..the bloke she met last night at her sister's party."

And that was that. Then he ran all the way, got to the bandstand and saw her walking ahead of him. So busy watching and thinking about her, he bumped into and fell over a cyclist, picked himself up ... she was watching and then a bloody football hit him on the head, bloke was a bit aggressive but he could deal with that, if he wanted to make something of it.

And there she was, and no.

He hadn't dreamed it.

It was still the same, she was still the same, small, fragile, dark, prettiest little face, but he wasn't. Suddenly unsure, not so confident...

"Are you stalking me? "

"No, but I would like to."

"What do you want?" and he blurted out the first thing that came into his head.

"I want you to have all my babies."

She gasped, her mouth opened, forming a perfect M, that he wanted to... Uh ... that had the most ...amazing effect ... He wanted to keep looking ... at it...

"You don't know me" she said.

And he said "I've got eyes haven't I?"

"I don't know anything about you." she said, and he said, "What do you want to know?"

And they sat in that snow covered park on a bench, on that bitterly cold February day and he told her about his debts, and the Inland Revenue.

His dad, and death duties, and maybe losing the house.

And about Harry, and the joke about marrying for money that maybe wasn't really a joke.

And she looked at him all the while ... and looked at him when, faltering, told her he wasn't a fraudster just hopeless with money, and she looked at him with those great dark eyes.

Then not knowing how to prove it to her, again said the first thing that came into his head.

"What're you doing at the weekend?"

"I am supposed to be running an election campaign. Why?"

"You got a car?"

"Yes. Why?"

And that was how he took her to Hazlington.

They had burgers and chips from the stand in the park, at least he ate his and most of hers and then he walked her back to the House, to the gates where the policeman saluted her and she walked through. Holding on to the railings, he climbed onto the low wall and called after her "Kate " and when she turned, blew her a kiss.

"Now then sir, if you wouldn't mind getting down" the constable said. And he jumped down and said to him, "It's a glorious day, isn't it ?"

"If you say so, sir."

Then unbelievably, he said " Have you ever been in love, Constable ?"

"Now and then, sir."

"Wonderful, isn't it?