Drowning

by ChimeraDragon

McKay's worst fears come true and he's in a Jumper that has crashed into the ocean again. This time Sheppard is with him but history seems bent on repeating itself. What will he do to ensure John survives?

Warning: AU, slash

Pairings: McKay/Sheppard

It started in the water.

Yet again.

Why does this keep happening to me?

I blinked blurry eyes and looked around the cockpit of the crashed Jumper, not sure why I was still alive.

The crash should have crushed the windshield...

I looked up and noticed that the glass was indeed broken, but ... I was alive? How was that even possible?

Moving my hand I noticed there really was water all around me. Surrounding me.

You know the weird part about it?

I actually felt safe and fine.

Until my brain kicked in and told me I should be drowning.

Drowning!

That was one of the nightmares I'd had since I was a kid and got trapped by a root in the river.

I couldn't be drowning!

I went to hold my breath and realized that I had been breathing in the water just fine. And that didn't make sense either. I shook my head and tried to remember what happened.

The Jumper shook and trembled with the effort of staying in the air. The engines whined and complained and we lurched through the sky, barely staying over the surface of the ocean.

"McKay! Get the engines back to full power or we're not gonna make it back to Atlantis!"

"I'm working on it. I can only do so much if I'm being shaken so hard I can't hold any of my tools!"

"Just try, Rodney!"

The Jumper made a sickening noise and the engines shut down completely.

The ocean rose up and we fell into the water.

We were sinking rapidly.

The engines were dead.

We sent out a distress call with our coordinates.

Now we would have to wait.

But, the windshield cracked and my body went numb. We dove into the back and the bulkhead door wouldn't close.

And I felt numb again.

I couldn't stand to loose him.

No way.

"What are you doing?"

I knew he could tell by the look in my eyes I was about to do something crazy.

"The only thing that will save your life."

I shoved him as hard as I could and leaped into the cockpit and pushed the override for the bulkhead door.

"Rodney! No!" John screamed as the doors slammed shut in his face and the window shattered.

"Don't die..." I begged in a whisper as the water came crashing in around me. I hit my head against the door as I was thrown from the pilot's seat and passed out. Sure that I was dead.

There was a thumping noise coming from the back of the Jumper, but I couldn't make it out. It almost sounded like someone hitting their head against the ... John.

I pulled myself along the bottom of the Jumper and leaned against the door. I quickly tapped back and heard a crash.

There was the muffled sound of words, but I couldn't quite make them out through the water. I pressed my ear against the door and tapped again.

"'Rodney?" came John's muffled voice. I tapped back once. "Is is one for yes and two for no?" I tapped once, and waited. "Isn't the cockpit flooded?" I hesitated before tapping again.

Looking around the cockpit I found my tablet, thank everything it was nearly indestructible and completely waterproof. I grabbed it and dragged it closer. Typing on the keyboard and knowing it's twin in the back would chirp at John.

'I'm alive. I'm not sure how. It's very dark in here, but I seem to be breathing just fine.' I sent the message and waited.

A few moments later there was a reply on my screen.

'How in the hell did you manage that? Did you find an oxygen tank or something?'

I felt my face and mouth.

'No. I seem to be breathing the water as though it were air. This is the first time this has ever happened. Though, admittedly I've never come so close to drowning before.'

I waited patiently waiting for his reply.

'Can you use your tablet for light and found out how much damage we took? It seems like we stopped sinking.'

I tapped once on the wall and turned the tablet around. The light was dim, but enough to see by. I could tell that the entire forward windshield was shattered, only jagged and broken pieces remained around the edges. Looking further I noted that most of the instrument panels seemed to be glowing faintly.

'The windshield is completely shattered, but it seems the rest of the systems have at least some power.' I wrote back.

There was a pause.

'Are you hurt?'

I turned the tablet around again and examined myself as best as I could. My chest seemed fine, my TAC vest was in once piece, but my shirt hung oddly. I move the light lower and nearly dropped the tablet.

...I had a tail.

A living tail, like in 'The Little Mermaid'. I reached down with a shaking hand and felt it. The skin was smooth like that of a dolphin and I could feel my own hand. I poked it hard with my fingers and felt the pain of digging in so hard. So, that ruled out a dream on my part.

'I ... have a tail. Like a merfolk.' I refused to call myself a mermaid.

'You're pulling my chain.'

I typed a few commands on the tablet and brought up the camera feature. Luckily it was equipped with a web-cam so it would be lighting and taking the picture at the same time. I moved it away from myself as far as I could manage and still get myself and my new additions in the picture. I quickly sent it.

'No way. Dude, that's cool. How long as this been around?'

'How am I supposed to know that? It's the first time I've ever heard of it happening.'

I rolled my eyes, noting how much John thought this was cool.

'Can you swim with it? Maybe you can fix the damage from the outside and work your way in, then we can get to Atlantis and figure this out.'

'I don't know, I haven't tried yet. Working on that now.' I sent the message and set down my tablet. I flexed the tail and it moved gracefully. Pushing myself away from the door and the floor I felt the instinctual movements that would drive me forward and out of the broken window. It seemed that moving gave me more air to think with. Laying still must not have been circulating enough oxygen to my system. I made my way out of the broken windshield and noted that we had luckily landed on an underwater mountain that was keeping us closer to the surface than I had been the last time I was in a Jumper that crashed into the ocean. I could faintly tell where the sun was so that gave me hope that Atlantis would be able to mount a rescue. I swiftly made my way around the outside of the Jumper, absentmindedly noting that the depth didn't seem to affect me too much. After quickly examining the drive pods it was obvious I wouldn't be able to get it to limp to the surface and get us both out of here.

I quickly made my way back into the Jumper and went back to my tablet, sitting in the chair by the door and letting my tail stretch.

It still felt weird to think about it what way. As a part of myself.

A part I never even knew I possessed.

'Rodney, are you okay? I haven't heard anything in a while.'

I smiled at the fact that John couldn't wait to hear back from me. I just hoped this wouldn't put too big a kink in the relationship we had just started to develop. I sighed to myself and wrote back.

'I'm okay. The pods are shot. Do you have air back there? I can swim just fine and we're not too far down. No further than Atlantis was when we found it.'

'Let me check for air. Are you sure you're okay? You seem to be handling this well.;

'Well enough, I'm sure the freak out will come later on.'

I could feel him smile at that comment and moved to the consoles. Making sure the internal dampeners were off and the engines to give John all the time he could with the air and the heading in the back. I felt a shill run up my spine.

'Apparently I'm not immune to the cold.'

'Damn, do you think if we got water in the back you could stay back here with me?'

'How am I going to get in without flooding you out?'

'Use the shield for a few moments?'

'I'll see what I can do. I don't want to get hypothermia. I'll check back in a few minutes.' I set the tablet down and looked around me. I just had to remember what systems controlled the the cloak and shields.

Working quickly I removed panel covers, fully expecting to be shocked or have the system run dead on me at any moment. But it never happened so I focused on what I was doing rather that how I was able to do it. That would have to be a thought for another day. Or at least later on.

I found the right panels and went back to my tablet. 'I'm going to turn the cloak into the shield, run it in the front and open the door. I have it programmed to shut after 6 seconds. Hold your breath when the water starts. If it's too high we can open the back but only for up to the next 15 seconds after the door closes.'

'Okay, got it.'

'Good. Starting now.' I looped the handle of my tablet onto my wrist and enter the commands into the pilot's console with a two second delay. I swam back over to the door and waited. The shield came on just over the windshield, the door opened halfway allowing me to flood into the back compartment with half of the water. I looked at John who was treading close to me and noted we would need to drop the water level for him to be able to help me. The bulkhead door closed and I moved to the back, holding onto the cargo netting and nodding to John for him to do the same. He did without question and held on as I pulled the lever to open the back hatch. As I had hoped the shield formed a bubble around the back of the Jumper and I dropped the water level down to just above the seats before closing the door again, afraid the shield would collapse too soon and drown Sheppard.

"Good thinking, Rodney!" John said with an enthusiastic smile as he patted me on the back.

I smiled at him and took a deep breath, finding that I could breath as easily on this side of the water as on the other. "Thanks."

"Your plan worked perfectly. So, now what do we do? Do you think we've got enough power to do anything else fancy?" He cocked his head and took a long look at me. "I do kinda dig the new look."

"I don't know!" I huffed, sitting on the bench and taking a look at myself in real light for the first time. I noticed that my tail; still a hard concept to wrap my mind around, was the same blue color at my eyes and started just below my bellybutton.

"Relax Rodney, I'm sure we'll think of something," John tried to soothe me.

"Yeah? You're not the one that'll be the science experiment when we get back! This is way beyond normal!" I felt some of the panic I should have been having a while ago creep up on me quickly.

"Hey! Relax, I doubt that. Seriously? They're our friends, why would they do that to you?" he asked in a soothing tone as he sat next to me. He gently reached out with his foot and nudged my tail the same way he would my feet when we were in a meeting.

"It's not them I'm worried about. It's Stargate Command and the IOA. I just know they'll think I was hiding this and they'll want to run tests on me. I ... I don't think I can handle that. Not at all. I'm the scientist, not the experiment. I ... I..." I felt myself starting to hyperventilate.

"Rodney, calm down!" John demanded. He looked at me but I couldn't meet his gaze as thoughts of being poked and prodded and cut open ran through my head. The world became a wash of horrible images, each worse than the last.

I came back to myself a few moments later with my head cradled against John's chest and my tail draped over his lap. I looked up slowly, having him be this cuddly outside of our rooms was new.

"I'm sorry," I murmured quietly. I put my arms around him and nuzzled his chest.

"It's okay. I won't let them do anything bad to you. You just worry about us both getting out of here and I'll worry about keeping you safe. Is that a deal?" He asked, not letting go of me. I felt his voice rumble in his chest a bit and smiled, knowing he would have a fiercely protective look in his eyes and on his face.

"Yeah, I'm sure we can manage this time. I needed that." I leaned back slowly, not wanting to move away from him, but at the same time, knowing I needed to work on our power consumption as well as make sure we were broadcasting our signal.

"Good. Now, what can I do to help you?" He looked at me with that look that said, 'I believe in you.' And I felt my knees(did I even have knees anymore?) get weak.

"Okay, well first of all we need to turn off any system we don't need on. Start broadcasting a distress beacon, and turn up the heat. We also need to make sure the CO2 scrubbers are at full. Hypoxia sucks." I smiled as I moved off of his lap carefully and snatched up my tablet and he grabbed the one he had been using.

"I'll work on the distress beacon, you work on the temp," he said as he watched me hook up his tablet to the control crystals.

"Good, we'll worry about the rest of it in a minute," I replied with a nod. I quickly shut down all the systems we didn't need and dialed up the temperature to just above freezing. That would save us a lot of power in the long run.

"Got it!" he called triumphantly as he looked up from his tablet. "I also tried turning on our subspace transmitter, it looks like it's working so hopefully they'll get the call soon."

"Good job, let's get the scrubbers online and dialed up then we'll figure out where to go from there."

"That's ... here, right?" he asked as he stood up and point to the exact panel in the seats where it was located. I nodded and he pulled the panel open, looking at the crystals and dials for a moment he pointed to the center dial. "This here, all the way to the ... right?"

"That would be it," I said, feeling a smile spread across my face at the fact that he had been listening to me when I was going over the systems with him in-case something should happen. He turned the dial and sat back, watching me as I unconsciously flicked my tail in the water. "I'm glad to see you were actually paying attention some of the times I was talking to you about these systems."

"So, now we wait?"

"Unfortunately, yes," I sighed. "I hate the idea of it, but that's the best idea. The last time I was in a Jumper that crashed into the ocean I wasted a lot of power trying to get it to surface after the forward compartment had flooded, and this one doesn't even have that much going for it. At least we were able to transmit our co-ordinates before we crashed and we got lucky by landing on a mountain. We're not as far down as I was last time. I'm sure that if Sam or his friends are around they'll help the others find us. We just need to concentrate on staying alive. I don't think there are any fractures to the hull so we don't have to worry about it flooding too much in here."

John gave a half-hearted laugh and shook his head.

"What?"

"You're really amazing, you know that?" he asked after staring at my face for a moment.

"What do you mean by that?" I demanded.

"You're a mer..." he paused searching for the right word. "Merman. And found that out by nearly drowning in the same ocean as the last time, yet you seem almost unfazed by it. Except for your short lived outburst earlier." He gave me another winning smile and watched me for a few moments.

"What's the point of freaking out? We're in a galaxy where we've both seen weirder. We've been at the mercy of strange alien scientist more times than we can count and had Ancient machines hit us will all kinds of rays and viruses. Why should this be so different from that? I was almost forced into Ascension for crying out loud!" My tail splashed the water agitatedly, and I noticed that it seemed to almost have a mind of it's own. "Seriously, how is this," I pointed down at my changed anatomy, "Really a negative? Assuming that I can control the change it would actually be an advantage. And who knows... maybe it's just a one time thing." I gave a half-hearted shrug.

"So, what are we going to do to ... pass the time?" John asked me with a lecherous grin.

"I can not believe you're honestly thinking about that at a time like this," I rolled my eyes at him.

We looked at each other for a moment before a short fit of laughter broke the silence.

"You are such a dork," I said.

"Yeah, but isn't that why you love me?"

"Nah, it's your dashing good looks. When I find someone hotter I'll let you know," I teased.

He pouted cutely, the expression not quite reaching his eyes. "Really?"

"No, not really," I relented finally. "But it's adorable to see you pout like that, even if your eyes are still laughing.

He shivered a bit and tried to laugh to cover it up, but I noticed and my brows furrowed in worry.

"Are you cold already?"

"No," he tried to lie to me, but couldn't look me in the eyes. He knew if I looked him in the eyes when he was lying I'd be able to tell. Not many people could, but I had been around him long enough to be able to tell the signs of a Sheppard lie.

"Liar," I said a little harshly and set my tablet aside, pulling him up on top of me for warmth. "I am a little insulated from the water like this, so I'm not getting cold as quickly. We could just cuddle up for warmth and wait. It'll probably be about a couple of hours or so before they get here."

"Okay," he relented, snuggling against me for all the warmth I could offer. Thankfully we both don't usually get cold very easily, and I can usually take his mind off of it by whining about something of my own. Despite what people seem to think, it's more of a habit to whine about my complaints to keep myself from being able to truly register them. Only so much the brain can deal with, so if you're trying to ignore the pain and concentrate on saying something about it... you don't really feel it as fully.

I tucked his head under my chin, unzipping our coats and TAC vests to allow more warmth to be shared between us. He started to drift off a little, and I didn't stop him.

"Don't worry, I have the tablet set to alert us if anything changes. A little sleep probably won't hurt."

"Okay," he replied and burrowed deeper. I finally took a moment to look him over and note how he looked. He seemed to be fine aside from a bump to the head and a minor laceration near his hair line. I sighed and allowed myself to drift off, not worried about looking for my own injuries at this particular moment in time.

"Ack!"

I awoke with a start to the sound of sputtering and noticed the water level had risen while we were asleep. I looked down at my tablet which was flashing a warning about it, but it looked like the water was muffling the sound. Something I should have thought of sooner. I looked around and saw John standing up in the water and noted that it was coming up to his armpits at this point.

"Are you okay?" I asked, noticing that I was treading just fine.

"Fine, I just inhaled a little water. Nothing to worry about yet, aside from the fact that when I looked at your tablet it seems there hasn't been any contact yet from Atlantis. And I think I might drown after all." He tried to smile carelessly, but failed. I could see the fear in his eyes and knew it must be reflected in my own.

"You will not drown." I stated firmly, and believed it. A sudden stroke of inspiration hit me and I looked at John with wide eyes.

"What?" he demanded, looking a little taken aback by my expression.

"I can smell you, and ... I don't think you CAN drown," I moved closer and sniffed him. Now that he wasn't choking on water the smell seemed to go down a bit, but it was still there. Something in the instinctual part of my brain told me that John would not be able to drown the same way I couldn't.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked, looking at me skeptically. "I just choked on water. It kinda felt like I was drowning for a second there."

"But that's the thing, I've done that before too and this never happened. Not until I was surrounded by water and was in danger. I think that's the trigger, or at least it was for me. You could, I dunno, trying concentrating on it like you to with the Ancient systems. See if you do, otherwise, I can try breathing for you since I doubt you could hold your breath long enough to get to the surface."

"I ... that's..." he hesitated. "Fine, I've contemplated crazier." He shrugged and brought his leg up to undo his lacings on his boots and quickly slid them off. "Not that I can actually believe I'm thinking about doing this." He sighed and quickly removed the other one. "Do you think I should get rid of my pants or...?"

I looked at him for a long moment and nodded. "It would probably be painful if you didn't. I wouldn't know since I took a pretty sizable hit to the head when I slammed against the bulkhead door."

He nodded and quickly stripped his pants off, just standing in front of me in a pair of dark blue briefs. He shighed and closed his eyes, concentrating and I moved closer.

Nothing happened for several minutes and I touched his shoulder and his opened his eyes with a start.

"Let me try something," I murmured quietly.

"Okay..." he replied, voice soft and full of trust.

I leaned in and wrapped my arms around his neck. "Concentrate on what it would feel like."

He closed his eyes again, knitting his brows together.

I leaned in and pressed my lips gently against his, and he opened his eyes for a second before letting them slide shut again. His arms twitched before circling around me and I could tell he was still trying but not as hard. I leaned backwards, letting us start to sink into the water and he remained calm. I could feel little spasms in his legs and they consciously moved together.

John ran his hands down my chest and then up my shirt, rubbing his fingers over my nipples and making me want to gasp, but I held on. I could feel a subtle ripple in his legs and let us sink further, the water closing in over his head. He didn't seem to mind, instead letting me breathe for him. It was awkward at first but seemed to come naturally.

After a few minutes he pulled back and we were both completely under the water, he seemed calm and at peace, his tail twined with mine. He gave me a knowing smile and I heard his voice in my head as though he was talking to me.

/You really are a genius./

/Yeah, but you're really a merman too./ I countered.

He looked startled for a moment and looked down, his tail was a greenish-blue color with hints of gold.

/That's cool./ he said, mental voice laced with excitement.

/Very cool. But now we need to get back to Atlantis before we freeze. How much of this do you think we can salvage?/ I asked looking around.

He shrugged and moved in for another kiss. This one went deeper and I knew through the unspoken bond we now shared that he wanted forever.

/Who cares right now?/

/I do, since I usually have to do the paperwork for it./ I grouched.

/Don't be like that. I figure we can see how...mating goes then worry about getting home./

/I hate it when you're logical./ I moaned as he managed to divest me of my remaining clothing.

/I know, but you love me for it./

I gasped as we fell into a swirl of motion and made love.

An hour later we were ready to leave the Jumper. What few supplies that could be salvaged had been packed up into a net we could drag between the two of us. I looked over a John who was practically glowing with happiness. Or maybe he was glowing. I looked closer and noted there were faint marking on his face, back and tail that were indeed glowing faintly with a blue tinge.

/You're glowing.../ I murmured quietly.

/So are you./ he replied offhandedly as he secured the last of our clothing into the net. We had both donned our TAC vests again, though we weren't really sure about changing back. The entire back of the Jumper had filled with water and the 'air' was starting to get thin. I had scavenged the Jumpers sensors and navigation into something we could use to find our way back to Atlantis that was waterproof. Now all we had to do was open the hatch and swim back.

Should be no big deal.

Right...

I sighed and John looked over at me. Feeling my apprehension at what was coming.

/What's wrong?/ he asked quietly.

/I just have a bad feeling about this, that's all. But luckily it's the normal bad feeling not the really bad 'we're all going to die horribly' bad feeling. I'm sure it's just my nerves. Like always. I'm probably over thinking it. But I haven't eaten since this morning and we have a really long way to go. With no idea about the currents in the ocean and.../

John interrupted me by kissing me again.

/Relax. We'll be fine. Let's just get home and worry later. Sound good?/

I nodded and tried to drink in his confidence. /Okay, let's do this./

I had my tablet in hand, intending to strap it onto my back once we were free of the Jumper and typed in the commands to opened the back. There was no rush, just a feeling of colder water. I sighed gratefully and attached my tablet to the Velcro on the back of my TAC. I took one side of the netting and John took the other. It seemed that we actually kept pace very well next to each other even though it was a little taller(longer?) than me. I checked our course every few minutes at first, but it seemed we had an instinctual knowledge of where we were headed.

Several hours later we arrived back on the pier of Atlantis. I had managed to get a message off when we were about twenty minutes away using my Tablet since our radios were fried. I let them know to look for us in the water and to send a med team and towels.

We reached the pier where Carson was waiting for us, expecting some horrible injury with two gureneys and a team with each one behind him. Teyla, Ronon and Weir were all waiting for us as well.

I felt my stomach knot up and John sent a glance my way that said, 'Don't worry. I'll handle it.'

"Thank god, I thought we'd lost ye," Carson exclaimed as soon as we were close enough. "How long have ya been in that freezin' water?"

"I dunno, probably a few hours, it's really not all that cold near the surface," John replied looking thoughtful. We both looked at the pier; this one was made for water bound ships and actually came very close to the water.

"But we do have some shocking news," I added. "We should have drowned in the Jumper but we didn' We made an ... unusual discovery."

"Can it wait?" Elizabeth asked, looking for all the world like a worried mother hen.

"Not really, no," John replied as he handed his side of the netting up to Ronon who was able to get a look at both of us as he grabbed it. For is part Ronon's only response was a widening of his eyes.

"What do you mean?" Teyla asked as she took my side of the net. She and Ronon moved it onto the pier but out of the way. As soon as she set the net down she crouched back down to offer a hand to help me out.

"Um, it's gonna take more than one of you to help us out," John said. He leaned against the pier and flicked his tail out of the water. Everyone took a half-step back except for Teyla and Ronon. They both just widened their eyes and watched up.

"Trust me, if I had known I would have informed you sooner, Elizabeth," I said as I saw her mouth open in question. I could not hear her thoughts, but you didn't usually need to with her. It was usually written on her face. I sighed and flicked my own tail for them to see.

Carson sputtered for a moment. "Be that as it may, you both still need out of that water. You're lips are turning blue," he shook himself. "Now out with ye both. And do I need to find a pool or to ya think ya can both change back?"

"Honestly, we don't know. We just hope that by getting out of the water and dry we should be able to be..." John failed and looked to me for help.

"Bipeadal again," I finished.

"Alrighty then, out with you," Carson said. Ronon moved towards me and with his help and Teyla's I was sitting on the dock with the medical team rubbing me down with towels.

"Woah!" John exclaimed as Ronon got the hang of it and pulled him out easily. As soon as his butt hit the pier the medics were rubbing him down.

Ronon turned back to me and carried me bridal style to the gurney where the medics continued their work. He then turned back to John who was drier now as well and gave him the same treatment.

"So, you're saying this happened when your Jumper crashed?" Elizabeth asked, voice still disbelieving.

"Yes, if you take my tablet I've already written a mission report on it. Everything but the swim here," I said as I reached for it and pulled it off of my soaking vest to hand it to her. It was still functioning and she took it with a smile.

"Thank you Rodney, now off with you to the Infirmary," Elizabeth said as she headed back for inside.

"Okay, but first I'd like to try to ... be human again," I said as I took a towel from one of the medics and held it over my lap and closed my eyes. I could feel John doing the same thing and the process seemed to take forever but I heard the gasps that told me it was working. Within a few moments I was laying naked on the gurney with only a towel and a TAC vest for cover.

"Nice work, Rodney," Carson commented. "But I want to look you both over, your lips are still blue and I don't want either of you getting sick from bein' in the water too long..."

"Yes, Carson," I groused, and he gave me a winning smile for it.

"Okay, well, I guess that means we get the rest of the day off, right?" John asked as he leaned back on the gurney and crossed his ankles; having already tucked the towel around his middle.

"Yes, you both are off duty until Carson clears you," Elizabeth said and walked off. "I want a full report when you're ready."

I smiled as we were wheeled away.

/John, can you still hear me?/ I tried, not sure if it would still work.

/Yeah, I can./

/Good. You know, I don't think I've ever been happier about nearly drowning in my life./

/I know what you mean./ He sent a wave of love and warmth at me. /And I don't think we'll have to worry about you ever drowning again./

/You too. I love you./ My eyes widened as I realized what I had just admitted to.

/I love you too. And I'm really happy to hear you say it./ I looked over and he was giving me the biggest, goofiest smile ever. I knew that despite everything, we'd be okay. Nothing could come between the bond we shared. And as a bonus, if we wanted to escape from everyone all we had to do now, was go for a swim.

Despite the wave of emotions that were crashing over the both of us.

We weren't drowning.