Shattering Icicles
Keep going… keep going…
With her breath caught in her throat, Narcissa quickened her pace slightly. She wore her heavy fur cloak, yet it couldn't shield her from the icy breeze that had swept through the manor hallways ever since their guests had arrived months ago. The last rays of day light filtering through the lead-light windows barely touched the marble floor, making the shadows lurking about appear all the more sinister. It did nothing to disguise the steady tapping of her shoes; the rhythm almost perfectly matched by the hushed footsteps of her pursuer.
More than once already she had had to suppress a shiver, knowing what could come. She saw the way their visitors looked at her; saw the relentless hunger in their eyes. Thieves, torturers, murderers– she knew what they were capable of, and knew that few in the manor, if any, would stop them should they be unable to resist any longer.
At this thought, Narcissa allowed her hand to drop by her side and slipped it into her pocket. Casually, as though she was simply searching for a key, she grasped her wand. A few more doors and she would reach the safe confines of her room. A few more steps and she could heave a small sigh of relief.
Almost there…
Narcissa leapt out of her skin as a hand reached forward and touched her shoulder. Whipping around with a yelp, she tried to struggle out of the stranger's grasp. The stranger instantly covered her mouth with a hand, and sensing what she was about to do, held tightly onto her wrist to stop her from withdrawing her wand.
"Shhh…"
Her heart was thumping wildly now as Narcissa continued to wiggle around. She could feel the man's – for Narcissa could only associate such strength with a man – hot breath on her neck, raising the fine, blonde hairs on it. She had underestimated how far behind he was. What was he going to do to her? Where was everyone else? As she beat her shoulders back and stomped her heeled feet, trying to find his feet, she could feel the man's hold tighten, urging to comply.
"Narcissa. Stop. Struggling," he whispered impatiently.
Anchoring her neck around, Narcissa's pale blue eyes widened as she met familiar, grey eyes. They darting back and forth, searching her eyes for understanding. Narcissa relaxed her body slightly, trying to ease her racing heartbeat. Slowly, the hand was released from her mouth, as was the hand clenching her wrist.
When she had recovered, Narcissa backed away. Snapping her eyes upwards, she gave her captor the fiercest glare she could manage.
"What in Merlin's name do you think you're doing, Lucius?" she hissed.
Lucius hastily put a bony finger to his lips as he looked around the empty corridor. Then, jerking his head towards the door of the nearest guest bedroom, he indicated for her to follow him.
Narcissa huffed and folded her arms tightly over her chest. What was he playing at? However, as something creaked in the darkness meters away, she hurriedly trailed into the room after her husband.
Lucius was standing at the doorway, tapping his foot nervously. Before she could even reach the arm chair nestled by the bed, Lucius was locking the door behind her and muttering an array of protective charms around it. Then, turning around, he furrowed his eyebrows as he tried to choose his words.
"What do you want?" Narcissa asked coldly, cutting to the chase.
"Have you mastered Occlumency yet?"
Taking a seat, Narcissa glared at Lucius again, this time annoyed that he had seemed to not have heard her question. He was staring back at her, eyes full of fear.
Sighing, she slowly bobbed her head. "Of course I have."
"Good." Lucius nodded thoughtfully, allowing his shoulders to sag slightly with relief. Then, as though he had been struck with a Confundus spell, he strode to Narcissa and reached for her hand.
Narcissa flinched, trying to ignore the hope lying within his watery eyes. Lucius swallowed but grasped it anyway.
"Narcissa, please… we need to talk," Lucius began, licking his lips nervously.
Sighing warily, Narcissa shook her head. It was too late for him to try now. She didn't want to hear the same repeated excuses, be told the same lies. He had screwed up and now there was nothing more to say.
Holding her icy glower, she cut him off. "I'm done talking."
"Please, Narcissa. I know this is my fault… My fault that you have to sneak around like a frightened mouse in your own home, my fault that they are here. I understand how you are feeling, and I know that it seems bad now, but I promise it will get better-"
She tried to block out his words, which was easy considering the low buzzing that was beginning to fill her ears. Her cheeks felt hot and she clenched her jaw. She couldn't believe it; it was all the same.
Scoffing, Narcissa stood up, wrenching her hand away from him. Barely controlling the way her fists trembled by her sides, she sneered at him. "Oh you understand, do you? You understand the way I jump every time I see a shadow? How I am constantly forced to hold my tongue? How I cannot sit and read a book in the library because He is there. How I cannot have dinner without having food sprayed on me from our raucous guests?" Lucius was wincing, but she allowed her voice to rise, for once not caring about any lady-like behaviour instilled in her upbringing. "You understand, do you, that I toss and turn each night as the screams below echo around the manor? You understand that I wonder if I will wake up to find that my husband has been arrested again and my son has been killed? No, I don't think so."
Narcissa paced across the room, wearing a deep trail into the soft carpet. Her eyes were flashing and her nostrils were flaring. Lucius was shaking his head, his own chest heaving.
"Narcissa, it would be different if Potter hadn't escaped last night-" Lucius began.
Spinning around, Narcissa marched back to Lucius. Though she was several inches smaller than him, she could see him baulk. Poking him in the chest with each word, she began to force him back towards the door.
"I do not give two damns about Potter anymore! Do you hear me? I don't care! We could've been killed! See this? Look at me, see this?" Tilting her neck, Narcissa pointed to a small but deep, crimson cut. "No, look! This is from last night when He lost it. If I hadn't managed to duck in time, I doubt I'd still be here. Not to mention Draco, who barely missed losing his leg in the cross-fire! It's a miracle I was able to calm him down enough to send him back to Hogwarts, where I still don't think he's safe."
It felt like a volcano was erupting in her chest; words she had been aching to say flowing through her lips, until she could yell no more. Hot tears were now stinging the corners of her eyes and she squeezed them shut. As she did so, Lucius grabbed her wrists, pulling them down by her side. She struggled a little but soon found her energy suddenly drained.
"Narcissa, stop."
"We could've been killed, Lucius, we could've been killed. I can't do this anymore," she finally whispered, her voice caught in her throat.
She allowed Lucius to guide her over to the seat once more. Kneeling down, he placed his finger underneath her chin and tried to make her look at him. Narcissa squeezed her eyes shut.
"Cissa, please. I will make this better – I promise."
Placing her face in her palms, Narcissa shook her head. "How? How could you possibly make this alright again?"
She could hear Lucius shifting uncomfortably. Dropping his hand back to hers, he gently rubbed his thumb over her knuckles soothingly. Usually this worked when they would fight but now, now was different. Sensing this and feeling desperate, Lucius fell to his knees in front of her.
"I have a plan. No, please, let me finish," Lucius hurried, seeing Narcissa shake her head again. "We- we will leave here. Go somewhere far, far away where no one will even know us – the Order won't find us and neither will He. I don't know, we could change our names or something, and fetch Draco along the way. Start a-fresh. Anywhere you'd like. Please, Narcissa, I promise I can make this work. We'll be safe again."
Slowly peaking up at him, Narcissa smiled softly, though the smile knew no true happiness. Everything seemed to be funny, as though her life was just one big comedy the heavens above were acting out.
"No more empty promises, Lucius. No more. You know that will never happen. They will never let us go – you will never let us go. What's the point in hoping anymore?" Slowly, Narcissa took back her hands and stood up. Motioning for Lucius to remain where he was, she quickly walked to the door and unlocked it.
"Narcissa, wait. Please, just think about it. I will meet you outside in half an hour; it's not much time, but I hope I will see you there. Please, I promise I'll make everything alright." Lucius called after her as she slipped through the door. His voice was strange, hollow – no longer the commanding, smooth tones they had once been.
Narcissa clicked the door shut behind her and walked up to the master bedroom. She was no longer in a hurry to race there, no longer fussed about who could be watching. As soon as she entered the room, she walked to the centre of the room and looked around. Lucius had completely lost the plot now; this was their home, and had been for over 20 years. Even if they could escape, could she really leave? Her eyes trailed from object to object… there, over in the corner by a small bookshelf, was her rocking chair that Lucius had ordered as a surprise engagement present. There, over on the wall, in a polished silver frame, hung Draco's first drawing of a small dragon. There, hidden behind the wardrobe doors that even Lucius didn't know about, was where she had been marking Draco's height over the years, when he would come scuttling in and cuddle up to her on the bed when Lucius was away on business.
Walking closer to her bed, Narcissa touched the intricately carved wooden post, lost in the past decade's memories. Her eyes continued wandering the room, before landing on the polished silver picture frames on the tall dresser. Slowly, she moved on towards them and picked one up. It showed Lucius, Draco and herself, standing regally in front of the manor one spring morning. Though none of them were exactly smiling, she could see the happiness shining though their eyes. No sadness, no fear, no hopelessness. What had happened? Would she ever get that back?
"Damn you Lucius, damn you to hell," Narcissa breathed.
Withdrawing her wand from her pocket, she waved it around, producing several suitcases, popping their lids open, and sending several objects flying neatly into them. Photos, clothing, jewellery, a few treasured items; small things, whose presence would go unnoticed should anyone happen to wander into the room. With a final wave of her wand, she closed the cases on her life and minimised the cases so that they could fit into her pocket. Then, ensuring that the room was left neat and tidy, as she would remember it, Narcissa swept from the room.
The gravel crunched beneath her feet as Narcissa walked briskly down the front path. Every so often, she would swivel her head back, just to be sure that no one was following her this time. The tall pine trees lining the path cast tall shadows as the last rays of orange sunlight touched their tips, but for once, Narcissa didn't avoid them. She kept her head held high, focussing on the man up ahead who was pacing nervously back and forth.
She had to suppress a small giggle as she saw Lucius start at the sound of her approaching footsteps. Quickly, he ducked over a small garden bed and pretended to examine it carefully, his white-blonde hair glinting in the setting light. Though he was as cunning as a fox when necessary, Lucius could never fool Narcissa.
Giving a polite cough, Narcissa strolled casually up to him. She quickly schooled her features into a blank expression, hiding her amusement.
Lucius' face lit up with relief as he peaked up at her. Smiling, he walked forward, intent on giving her a kiss in greeting. Narcissa however, turned her cheek, settling instead for walking by his side as she continued on towards their gate.
"You came," Lucius said as he kept up with her march.
Narcissa simply nodded her head once. They continued up the path in silence, looking anywhere but at each other. Narcissa focussed her gaze upon the birds flying high above, watching as they soared majestically home to their nests for the evening. Beside her, Lucius would occasionally look back at the manor, pausing each time he heard something disturb the path behind them.
As they finally reached the large, iron gates, Lucius cleared his throat. "I have contacted Severus, just in case you changed your mind. He has informed Draco we will be there soon to see him, but doesn't know any of the details. I don't think he'd guess at what we're really doing… probably assumes it's something to do with another mission."
Narcissa raised her eyebrows but didn't comment. Just as she'd thought, Lucius was going to have trouble pulling this off. Part of her wanted to turn on her heel and run back, yet still she pushed onwards when Lucius stopped.
"Cissa-"
"Cissy! There you are, I've been looking for you."
Ice ran through Narcissa's veins as she slowly turned around. Would she never be able to walk anywhere without being followed? Absentmindedly, as she plastered a false smile upon her face, Narcissa patted her pockets ensuring that her suitcases were tucked away out of sight. Walking back to Lucius' side, she held her breath as her sister came trudging towards them.
"Bit cold for a midnight stroll, isn't it, Malfoy?" Bellatrix narrowed her eyes at Lucius.
Narcissa shifted uncomfortably on the spot. Her palms were sweaty and her heart thudded painfully against her ribs. Bellatrix knew what they were planning; Narcissa didn't know how she had found out, but she had.
"If you must know, I like to appreciate my yard from time to time, Black," Lucius retorted, lifting his chin.
Bellatrix raised a delicate eyebrow at his haughtiness before turning to Narcissa and smirking. " I hope you weren't planning on going anywhere for too long."
Narcissa mimicked Lucius' actions, holding her head higher and standing taller. However, instead of arguing back, she smiled endearingly at Bellatrix.
"Of course not, Bella. We were going to head back soon. Was there something you needed?"
A gleam of delight sparkled in Bellatrix's dark eyes and her smirk turned into a wide smile. Forgetting her annoyance at Lucius, the witch began to bounce on her feet happily.
"How could I forget? Yes, yes, something wonderful has happened! I have come to fetch you… both of you," Bellatrix sneered in Lucius' direction again before the excitement shone on her face again. "You're needed back at the manor and to prepare yourselves. This is it! It's what we've been waiting for!"
A lump rose to Narcissa's throat as she struggled to keep her smile. Her voice cracking, she asked, "What do you mean?"
Bellatrix blinked at her, dumfounded. Then, with a wicked cackle emanating from her thin lips, she clapped her hands together. "The final battle of course! We must depart, quickly; the Dark Lord has called for a final stand! This is it; we're going to win this thing!"
Not waiting for a response, Bellatrix turned on her heel and bounded off back towards the manor.
Narcissa's stomach swirled uncomfortably, tumbling and turning. Bile rose to her throat and she swallowed thickly. Her world was spinning around; any hope that they could ever be safe had shattered. Reaching out, she clasped Lucius' hand to steady herself.
"Hurry up! The Dark Lord is waiting!" Bellatrix called over her shoulder.
Lucius turned to her, meeting her frightened gaze. Squeezing her hand, he reassured her, "I will get us out of this mess, no matter what. I promise."
Narcissa squeezed his hand back.
A/N: I do not own anything you recognise from the mystical and amazing world of Harry Potter.
This unbeta'd piece (uploading now as it is due very, very soon and don't want to risk not submitting at all) was written for the Big/L'il Sis competition run on the HPFC forum. As you probably have realised, apart from the SPaG and possibly grammar/ flow issues, this fic is riddled with cheesy lines. My apologies for that - will fix it ASAP, as well as the unoriginal bluh quality to the story.
Nevertheless, I tried because I love Lucissa and didn't want to completely screw it up. More importantly, I didn't want to let my big sis down, who's fic is connected to mine (and vise versa) with the angsty feel. I'll link you to it when it is uploaded, and judging by her fic ideas alone, I'd definitely recommend you read it :) My prompts for this first round were: 1) (pairing) Lucius/ Narcissa, 2) (plot device) a promise, 3) (time) dusk. Word count: 2793
Thank you for reading, and as always, if anyone is interested in beta'ing this piece or pointing out any SPaG etc., you are more than welcome to let me know :) -Tigger x
