Symphonie
Authors note- The two songs mentioned in here are Marlene Dietrich's absolutely beautiful pieces: 'Quand l'amour meurt' and 'Symphonie'. I got the idea for this fanfic while listening to the two songs one night and I was planning on putting it somewhere in my giant Remus/Tonks fanfic but that story is already twenty chapters long. But it was short and kinda off the central plot so I wrote it as a oneshot.

I like to think that this little scene took place between two of the already written chapters. It takes place in May of 1996….a month before Sirius dies at the Department of Mysteries.


Nymphadora Tonks stared down at the dark haired man sitting lazily in his customary armchair. "Sirius, you are the world's biggest git. Every time I come here you're drunk or getting drunk…"

"-or recovering from a hangover." Her cousin added, taking another swig from his bottle of firewhiskey.

Tonks rolled her eyes. "That too. Why so grim these days, cuz?"

He gave her a look that a few months ago would have sent her stammering nervously from the room. But she was used to it now.

"Come'on! Why today?"

"Piss off." He said nastily.

Tonks flopped down on the sofa and lay stretched out on it. She remembered from months ago, seeing Remus sleeping in the very spot she was now on at present. She closed her eyes for a moment and breathed deeply as if hoping the couch would somehow have retained his scent. That wonderful smell of clean soap…tweed…and chocolate….

She inhaled deeply and gagged. The old velvet couch smelled remarkably like overgrown mold and Mundungus Fletcher's pipe weed.

She wrinkled her nose in disgust and sat up. Sirius was leaning over, using his wand to tap the nearby, half broken phonograph that was perched on a rickety side table.

Strong static filled the room and she sighed leaning against the arm of the couch, feeling very tired and very, very bored. Work evenings that weren't filled with Order work were usually like this.

A woman's smoky voice broke out over the static. Tonks raised an eyebrow.

"What is this?"

But Sirius wasn't listening it seemed. The way he was swaying to the music with his bottle Tonks guessed his mind was miles away and had a fast plan to becoming totally pissed in the next short hours with aid of his firewhiskey.

She listened to the singer's voice for a short while. The music sounded very old. Like French 1940's rubbish…the song wasn't even in English.

And yet, it was very pretty. Something perhaps about the simple tune and the woman's unique voice had Tonks thinking…thinking about something she had always wanted to do but had kept a secret. Something she had always wondered about-

"I always wished I could dance to this sort of stuff."

He snapped out of his daze to stare at her in surprise. "You could if you wanted."

She laughed outright and stretched out her feet. "Sirius, stop it. That's not even funny."

He frowned. "Why couldn't you?"

"I'm not one of those girls Sirius."

"Nonsense. Every woman can dance."

She laughed. "Not me."

He looked at her, an almost sad look on his gaunt face. "You don't give yourself enough credit sometimes young Tonks."

She shrugged. "I've accepted the truth. I'm clumsy as hell. "

He shook his head. "You've accepted what other people have had to say around you. I see something more, Remus defiantly sees something more, but you can't."

Tonks frowned. "What?"

"What are you afraid of, ridicule?"

"Who said I was afraid of anything?"

"You just said you don't dance."

She sighed. "I should clear that up. I meant proper, respectable dancing. I can dance at clubs and fit in fine at mosh bits and other places."

"Ah." Sirius said. "You mean that mad dancing your youthful generation is so fond of."

"Yup." She grinned. "I'm not half-bad at that stuff, but I can't dance proper."

"Have you ever tried?"

She laughed again. "Sirius!"

"Have you?"

"Of course not! When I was younger, my mother wouldn't even dream of tormenting some poor dance instructor with such a disaster."

"What if you were fortunate enough to find a patient instructor with too much time on their hands, would you be willing to at least try?"

She stared. "Huh?"

"I could teach you." He said, the smallest of smiles appearing on his gaunt face.

"YOU can dance?"

"Forgive me for my lack of modesty but, I dance remarkably well."

"Really? Is this one of those miraculous talents you seem to pick up while intoxicated?"

"I'm not completely sloshed yet."

"No, but your well on your way."

He shrugged. "Can't argue with that I suppose. But yes, I can still dance very well even when I'm sober."

She bit her lip. "Well…"

"Do you want to learn?"

He had to be pulling her leg. "No. I haven't had any broken bones this year or ended up in St. Mungo's and I'd prefer to keep it that way."

"Tonks," her cousin said seriously. "No one is around. No one else will ever know. And I won't make fun of you for botching it up or anything."

He knew her too well. They were very similar like that. They both had their dignity, even if it was rather tarnished and worn.

"Come'on." He said, standing up (if slightly unsteadily). "I'm depressed, I want to dance. Make me happy."

She hesitated, just for a moment before standing up as well. "I must be really mad."

"Or really desperate dear cuz. Perhaps one day this will come in handy for you and Remus."

"Can Remus dance?" she asked curiously.

"Well I taught all my mates a little bit at one time, but I'm sure he's forgotten how. And I was always much better than he was."

She laughed. "Sounds like you're a little threatened."

"Do you want to learn or not?" he growled.

"Oh shut it." Tonks said coming up to him and then stopped, having no idea what to do.

He straightened up and pushed his long black hair out of his face. "Right. Dancing…it's much simpler than some people make it out to be."

"Alright."

"For these particular songs- we're going to learn a certain type of dance."

"The French café dance?"

"Something like that."

"Old school, fancy hoity-toity ballroom stuff?"

"That's what you want to learn, isn't it?"

She nodded furiously. "Yup. Just making sure you knew."

He came up to her and stared right directly into her eyes.

She blinked and giggled when he didn't look away after a short time. "Er, Sirius-"

"Trust me on this. Step one; you have to look into my eyes."

She gulped. "Uhhhh…"

He laughed softly. "Tonks, this is a sensual dance. It involves not only physical but mental connection between the two dancers."

"We're connected through family." She said stiffly.

He chuckled. "I know. I'm saying that we as dancers we need to be connected in a more unique way."

She sighed and forced herself to stare into his fathomless, grey eyes.

"Good." He said. "Now stand up straight, arms relaxed at your sides and remember to breath deep and slow…you need to relax."

"We're very close." She pointed out.

"Yes. That's the general idea. Now relax and think about your breathing."

She did so and found herself more and more relaxed with each passing second.

"Now…" Sirius said slowly. "The key to this whole thing is balance."

She started to snicker at that but stopped at the look in his eyes.

"To do that…" he said. "We need to have the right stance."

"Okay. What do I do?" she asked cheerfully.

Sirius moved his hand around her torso and placed it on the middle of her back. "You need to put your left hand on my right shoulder. Right there, a little further up. Perfect."

Tonks felt like an idiot. She must have looked ridiculous in her torn, patched jeans and her bright pink hair trying to act like an elegant, experienced dancer. "What about my other hand?"

Sirius put up his free hand on his side, about shoulder level. "Our hands meet together like this. Gentle pressure." He said taking her hand in hers. "Now, flex your knees a bit, keep your chest open-"

"What do you mean 'your chest-?"

"Facing your partner. Keep your chest facing your partner. There, you're fine like that. Now look up at me. Don't look at your feet."

She bit her lip and forced herself to look up. "Okay."

"Now, you are going to step forward with your left foot at the same time as I go back on my right foot."

"Er, okay. Got it."

"Ready?"

She nodded.

"Alright…go."

Tonks managed to step forward with her left foot, but much too far, she collided into Sirius and her hand slipped from his shoulder.

"Oh no! No, I know I shouldn't have done this!" she said wretchedly, breaking away and throwing her arms up in the air.

"Don't be ridiculous." Sirius said coolly. "You just stepped a bit too far. Here watch, this is what it will look like-" he placed his arms out in front of him as he had an imaginary partner and started to dance across the room, his legs gracefully avoiding the furniture. He seemed to move almost fluidly, with catlike tread- so sure of every move and making it all look positively easy.

She gaped at him. "You CAN dance."

He stopped and lowered his arms, grinning. "You didn't believe me?"

"Where on earth did you learn how to do that?"

"Its one of the few things I retained from being a member of the noble Black family."

"Ah." She said uncomfortably.

But he was still smiling. "I'm actually a little rusty."

"A little rusty?!?! That was brilliant! How did you get so good?"

"I didn't practice with the dementors in Azkaban if that's what you mean."

"Seriously, how?"

"Its one of those things…one of those things you always remember" Sirius said slowly. "Some things you learn, you never forget. You can just always pick them back up even if you haven't done them in years."

"Teach me!" she demanded.

"That's what I'm trying to do. Don't worry." He added as her face fell in disappointment. "You can learn it. You have two legs, you know your right from your left and therefore there is nothing that can stop you from not learning it."

"Could Mad-Eye learn? He knows his right from his left, but he's only got one leg."

"He's got a wooden one, yes, but I know for a fact that he can dance even if it's slightly awkward."

"I would pay good money to see that."

He laughed at that. "Alright, come here. Let's teach you how to dance."

"What are we dancing by the way, what type of dance?"

"It's a sort of tango…"

"It looked like a very slow tango."

"They all don't have to be fast."

"Oh."

"Now, lets try it again."

For what seemed like hours, Sirius patiently taught her the simple moves of dancing the tango and by the end; Tonks was comfortable enough to practice the basics with her cousin and hold a small conversation at the same time.

"Sirius?"
"Hm?" he said, gently spinning her about. "Left pivot, Tonks-"

"Oh, right sorry-did you…I mean…was there any woman for you…before….everything?"

He said nothing for a moment. "Perhaps." He said slowly. "I never had any intention to settle down during the first war. Love was something special and to me if you weren't James or Lily Potter everything else just seemed phony."

"Do you wonder…" and she trailed off.

"If I hadn't gone to Azkaban I would have settled down with someone?" he finished for her. "I'm not sure. I think about it sometimes. There were quite a few extraordinary women I encountered in my time but I just kept searching around. I had the feeling there was something else out there for me."

A new song started up on the crackling phonograph. The woman's deep French voice began to croon another new song and Tonks noticed with a jolt of shock that Sirius was singing softly along to the words.

"Lorsque tout est fini…Quand se meurt votre beau rêve-"

"You speak French?" Tonks asked in shock.

He nodded carelessly.

"What does it mean?"

He frowned as he listened to the song for a little while before finally saying,

"When all is finished,

When your beautiful dream dies…

Why cry as the days flee? To regret the dreams left?

The kisses are faded…"

His paused for a moment and his frown deepened as he continued on,

"The novel is quickly completed.

And remains forever ravaged….

When all is finished."

"That's kind of depressing for such a cheerful tune." Tonks said.

"It is? Isn't it?"

"Now I know why you and Remus are such good friends. You speak depressing French, Remus listens to depressing opera- I feel so cheerful and uncultured around you two."

"He still listens to opera?" Sirius asked, looking exasperated.

"Sadly."

Sirius shook his head in disgust. "I'll have to talk to him. Right foot. Right- very good."

"Oh, thanks."

"You're doing very well."

"You're being such a gentleman. It's a little surprising." Tonks said.

He smiled, not unkindly and continued to spin her around the room as the music picked up pace.

Tonks spun about happily feeling elated. She was dancing. Actually dancing properly and gracefully like a real dancer. The song on the phonograph ended suddenly and another song, much slower and somber than the last filled the dark room.

"This one's lyrics are probably just as depressing as the previous one, aren't they?" Tonks asked, sneaking a glance down at her feet to make sure she wouldn't trip on Sirius's feet as she turned.

But Sirius seemed very deep in thought and didn't answer her question. A few seconds later however, he was singing softly again, barely above a whisper with his low, husky voice,

"Symphonie, Symphonie d'un jour,

Qui chante toujours

Dans mon coeur lourd… "

His grey eyes were still as fathomless as ever, but the soft look in them made Tonks think that his mind was thousands of miles away, and perhaps even in another time all together.

They were standing so close, and with Sirius's face right near hers it didn't take much effort for her to lean forward and ever so gently kiss him on the side of his pale, unshaven face. He didn't react to it though. He didn't even blink but instead continued to hold her close and kept slowly dancing, all the while singing the song in a half-whisper,

"Symphonie,

D'un soir de printemps

C'est toi que j'entends

Depuis longtemps… "

Unbeknownst to them both, the parlour door creaked open, just a crack and Remus Lupin peered in. Upon seeing them both, he smiled and continued to watch them from his concealed position as they slowly danced around the parlour.

Sirius had closed his eyes, yet his steps were as sure as ever as he lead his younger cousin gently about the room.

"Le bruit de votre voix que je trouve maintenant encore à l'intérieur de moi.

Elle a fini, il a fini,

Mon symphonie…"


Authors note II: My French is utter rubbish. As is my non-existent tango dancing. But here's Sirius's song translated the best I can make it:

"Symphony, Symphony of a day that will always

Sing in my heavy heart

Symphony of an evening in spring…

Its you that I hear.

The sound of your voice I now find again inside me

It's finished, it's finished.

My symphony…"