AN: I'm new to FanFiction, so I thought what better way is there to enter the FanFiction world than by commentating the worst story ever written? I've never read it before, so enjoy reading me explode at the horribleness. The bold lines are my commentary and the normal ones are the original text in case you couldn't figure out that much. Enjoy!

AN: Special fangz

Alright...I'm two words into the author's note, and I already can tell this story is going to blow.

(get it, coz Im goffik)

Goffik? Oh yeah, this will definately blow.

2 my gf (ew not in that way)

My mind is not that dirty. Pretty dirty, but not quite there.

raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling.

This Raven chick must be the worst beta reader on the planet.

U rok! Justin ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! MCR ROX!

Does this bitch have tourettes? My Chemical Romance has NOTHING to do with this.

Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way

Okay, one, why is there a an apostrophe in Darkness? It is completely unnessecary. Two, the name Ebony Darkness Raven Way is hideous enough alone, why did she have to put Dementia in there? Ew. Just ew.

and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name)

Damn...I would have never thought of that. Thank God Tara thought of us simple folk and took the effort to break down that info.

with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears

How do you describe something using the phrases "icy blue" and "limpid tears" and not make it sound corny and uncreative? That's right, you can't.

and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!).

You DO NOT, under any circumstances, model an OC after a celebrity and then have the character say "People tell me I look like_" It's fucking lazy. And also corny. And stupid. And Mary-Sueish.

Also, telling your readers to "get da hell out of here" if they don't know the singer your Mary Sue is supposed to look like does not earn you fans. Besides, we're here to read about your take on characters from various TV shows and movies and what not, not fucking Amy Lee from Evanescence.

I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie.

Wait, what? She did not just say...she couldn't have...let me re-read that...(re-reads) Oh, Jesus...

I'm a vampire

And here I thought it couldn't get any more stupid.

but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England

Scotland. Ass.

where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen).I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots.

That's hideous.

I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow.

What kind of asshole wears red eye shadow? I don't even own any red eyeshadow.

I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining

You mean sleet?

so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

That's what I do when someone is looking at me.

"Hey Ebony!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy!

"What's up Draco?" I asked.

"Nothing." he said shyly.

Ha ha. Draco...shy...

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.