"Love for the Unloved" Contest Entry

Title: Begin Again

Your pen name(s): herinfiniteeyes

Featured "B-list" Character(s): Angela/Ben

If you would like to see all the stories that are a part of this contest visit the "Love for the Unloved" C2 Community:

http://www(DOT)fanfiction(DOT)net/community/Love_for_the_Unloved_Contest/72809/

Thank you to my beta, and I hope you guys like this. It's definitely a departure for me, so hopefully I didn't bungle it too horribly:)

Psst..thanks Adrena;) You're the best!

Angela POV

"Mommy! Mommy! Wake up!" Kiley squealed as she hopped on my bed, jarring me guiltily out of an entirely inappropriate dream about Bagel Ben.

"Uggggghh, baby, where's Nana?" I groaned, rolling over and peeking at the alarm clock. I'd have to get up soon to take her to school, anyway, but my mom was usually the one to take care of her in the mornings since I worked late shifts at the video store.

"Nana's on the phone ordering my birthday cake!" she exclaimed, excited as only an eight-year-old girl can be when discussing her impending birthday. She bounced a few times and crawled up to sit on the pillow next to my head. "Mommy, can we invite Bagel Ben to my party? Can we?"

I sighed and sat up next to her, considering her request. Ben Cheney, or "Bagel Ben" as he was known around town, was the owner of the neighborhood bakery. We stopped there every morning on our way to Kiley's school to get bagels for breakfast. Ben was always there, dependable, friendly...and hot.

Not that I would notice something like that, of course. I was a single twenty-six-year-old mother of a soon-to-be-nine-year-old girl; I had no time to notice the physical appeal of the opposite sex.

At least, that's what I'd been telling myself since my last failed attempt at dating four years ago. Kiley was the most important part of my life, and between keeping up with her and working full-time at the little indie video store, I just wasn't ever up for the effort required to have a relationship with a man.

Getting knocked up at seventeen by my high school sweetheart who ran away as soon as the second pink line showed up on the little white stick wasn't exactly the best way to give me much faith in men. Sadly, the guys I'd tried dating since then were more or less cut from the same cloth as Eric, and I'd never been able to just relax and trust someone enough to date them.

Kiley's big brown eyes shined up at me, begging me to invite Ben to the party. She considered him one of her friends, and I had to admit that he was always really wonderful with her. I smiled down at her and pulled her into my lap, attacking her smooth cheeks with kisses as she squealed in fake protest. "Okay, how about this? If you promise to pick up your room tonight and eat all your vegetables at dinner without complaining, I'll invite Bagel Ben to your party, okay?"

Kiley's delighted screech echoed through the small apartment and I laughed at the happy sound. She swore she'd clean her room right away and claimed she'd even eat vegetables for breakfast. I laughed and climbed out of bed, telling her to do that as I went to go get ready for the day.

Once in the bathroom, I threw off my nightgown and stared at myself in the mirror. I wasn't exactly a hot mom, but I hadn't let myself go over the years, either. My skin was pale from a life lived in Washington, but it was unblemished and I hadn't suffered a wrinkle yet. I had passed my brown eyes down to Kiley, and my slightly wavy dark brown hair was worn in a low-maintenance shoulder-length bob.

The only problem I had with my physical appearance was my post-baby body. Even nine years later, I still had faint stretchmarks and my breasts weren't as perky as they had been when I got pregnant at seventeen. I was lucky not to have the baby pooch that some of my friends bemoaned, but the stretchmarks were enough to make me self-conscious whenever I actually got naked with someone.

I pulled myself out of the impending grumpfest I could feel building whenever I dwelled on my lack of a sex life.

Twenty minutes later, I was showered and dressed. Kiley was sitting at the kitchen table with Nana, pouring over a Toys R Us catalog and pointing out the different toys she liked. My mom looked up at me when I entered and gave me a sly smile. "Good morning, dear. I just got off the phone with Ben. He said he'd be more than happy to make the birthday girl's cake."

I regarded her suspiciously as I gathered my things. I knew my mom wanted me to start dating again, but I wasn't sure how I felt about that. The last guy, Tyler, had really let me down and disappointed Kiley. She'd asked about him for a month after he broke up with me, and it broke my heart every time.

I couldn't risk her becoming attached to someone, only to have them walk out of our lives when things weren't working anymore.

I sighed. "Mom, Ben is just a friend. What are you trying to do, anyway?"

She gave me a completely innocent look. "I have no idea what you're talking about, honey. I'm just telling you that he's making the cake, simple as that."

I rolled my eyes in disbelief and slipped on my plain black canvas slip-ons. I was going to work later in the day, but I wanted to get some birthday shopping done after I dropped Kiley off at school, so I was wearing part of my work uniform of black jeans and black shoes with a black Sorry About Dresden t-shirt. "Okay, whatever you say, mom. Come on baby girl, we'd better get going," I told her.

She jumped up and went to grab her backpack. I turned back to my mom to say goodbye, but she was regarding me with a critical eye. "What?" I snapped impatiently, not liking the way she was looking at me.

She pulled back and shook her head. "You know, Angela, you're in your mid-twenties. You're someone's mother. Don't you think it's time to start dressing more like it?"

I grumbled and ran a hand through my hair. "Mom, I dress this way because I like it. I refuse to wear mom jeans. We've been over this!"

After my mother and Bill, my step-father, divorced while I was in high school (pretty much around the exact same time I'd announced my pregnancy). While my teachers had been stunned, and my friends completely shocked, my mom was utterly devastated. It made me feel horrible at times when I thought back on it, because she'd cried for days. Now that I had Kiley, I could understand, but at the time, it'd been really hard for me to endure the guilt of disappointing her.

Having my mom live with me had been a blessing in many ways: she helped with Kiley, kept the place clean while I was at work, and kept me company. Unfortunately, living with my mom also had plenty of drawbacks. She was nosy and she loved to meddle.

She gave me a resigned sigh. "Fine, fine. Just don't expect the eligible adult men around here to ask you out on dates. Nobody wants to date a grown woman who dresses like a twelve-year-old boy," she muttered under her breath.

I'd had enough, so I waved goodbye and ushered Kiley out the door, intent on ignoring her well-meaning advice.

The bakery was busy, as usual, but Ben smiled as soon as he spotted us walking through the door. I felt my stomach clench in the pleasant way it always did whenever I saw him, but I pushed that knowledge away and gave him a strictly friendly smile in return.

Ben Cheney was my idea of a sexy piece of man. He wasn't conventionally handsome or built like an underwear model, but he had floppy brown hair and big, honest eyes that never failed to draw me in. His little self-conscious smirk coupled with his long, lean body called to me on so many different levels, it wasn't even funny. He was smart and adorable, and he had this humble self-deprecating humor that never failed to entertain me.

He was my type in every sense of the word, but he'd never made a move, and I certainly wouldn't be the first one to make one. With that in mind, I stepped up to the counter and reminded myself that I wouldn't be licking frosting off his naked body anytime soon. (Well, at least not in real life. That's what dreams are for, right?)

I groaned inwardly when he met us at the counter and beamed down at my daughter. He was just so fucking...guh. "Hey, kiddo! Guess what? I'll be making your birthday cake. Transformers, right?" he teased her as he peeked up at me and winked.

My vagina hit the floor in shock. How could someone so adorable like a cupcake be so fucking sexy at the same time?

It really just wasn't fair at all.

I swallowed convulsively and felt my brain buzzing with sex deprivation as I stared at him dumbly. Luckily, he was talking to Kiley. "Eeewwwuh! No way!" she shrieked, wrinkling her pert little nose at him in disgust.

He laughed and I watched in fascination as the dark blue t-shirt he was wearing tightened across his lean chest. The muscles in his neck and shoulders flexed as he chuckled and I watched on, hopelessly and pathetically. "Well, I stand corrected. It was the Little Mermaid, right, Mom?" he asked as he smiled down at my girl and tweaked her nose lightly. She giggled and nodded her head excitedly.

Unfortunately, there were people in line behind us, so I was forced to snap out of my lust-induced haze and order our bagels. Ben grabbed them and poured a cup of coffee for me. We liked to eat at the bakery when we had time, because there was a nice seating area with cozy tables and comfortable chairs, so we wandered over and sat down after I paid.

Today, Ben followed us. He brought a cup of coffee and a bagel over for himself and sat down across from me. I tried to avoid looking at him, because my dirty dream about the frosting was once again in the forefront of my mind. I shifted nervously in my chair and tried to focus on my bagel, but Kiley was poking me in the side and casting me desperate looks.

"Did you need something, baby?" I asked her pointedly. She shook her head and peeked at Ben, biting her little lips and puffing out her cheeks in impatience. I recognized that look, because I got the same one whenever I was frustrated or impatient with someone.

I realized then what she wanted. I put my crumbled bagel back on my plate and looked up to see Ben sipping coffee and smiling curiously at us. "Um, Kiley wanted to know...I mean, that is, we wanted to know if you'd like to come to her birthday party on Saturday afternoon," I questioned.

I watched his face carefully, on the lookout for the slightest sign of discomfort. I didn't see any, however, as he smiled hugely and said, "I'd love to!"

Kiley bounded out of her chair and flung herself at him, a bundle of pure excitement and joy. Ben hugged her close and peeked over her head at me to make sure it was okay. I nodded briefly and he set her down so she could return to her seat. She began chattering about all the things we were going to do at the party, and he listened intently, commenting in all the right places.

Seeing Ben with my baby girl like this made it so difficult to maintain my distance from him; he was just so wonderful with her in every way, always so patient and warm. We'd known him since the bakery opened up three years ago, and he was probably the most reliable man in her life, which...sounded really unfortunate and pathetic, when I thought about it like that.

Ben kept casting me covert glances when he thought I wasn't looking, and I couldn't figure out why. It wouldn't be a stretch to say that I often caught myself staring at him, but I'd never really seen him looking back.

At least, not until today.

Feeling myself get flustered, I took a few sips of my cooling coffee and tried to finish my bagel. I wasn't hungry, but I needed something to do with myself until we had to leave. I heard him ask something, but I was lost in my thoughts. "Sorry?" I said, sounding wistful. I cringed and hoped he hadn't heard it.

Ben smiled adorably and sat back in his chair. "I was just asking if you needed any help setting up on Saturday. It's my day off, so..."

I felt my cheeks heat as I met his gorgeous hazel eyes. "Umm..." I faltered, struggling to come up with a coherent answer. I felt Kiley poking me again, and I looked down at her in confusion. She nodded her head at me desperately, her sweet little lips pursed in suspense. "Okay, yeah, I mean, if you want to. I'd hate to ruin your day off," I stuttered out awkwardly.

Ben ruffled Kiley's hair and winked at me again. I was no more prepared for it the second time than I was the first time. "I can't think of a better way to spend my day off than to hang out with two of the coolest ladies I know," he replied with natural charm.

The thing that always bowled me over about Ben was his honest sincerity. He could give the corniest compliment, but he was always so sincere that it was impossible not to believe him. I heard Kiley giggle and checked my watch as an excuse to let my heart rate calm down before looking at him again. I saw it was time to head out, so I was prepared when I made eye contact with him. "Well, I can't argue with that. We've got to go now, but we'll see you tomorrow, I guess..."

He nodded and stood up to give Kiley another hug. I grabbed my bag and stood there awkwardly, but he completely shocked me. He stood up from hugging her and reached out for me, pulling me close in a hug.

This was the first time he'd ever touched me like this, and it sent my hormones into a tailspin. Even though the hug was completely innocent, my overeager and underused loins quivered in excitement as his long arms wrapped around my back, engulfing me in his warm, comforting scent. He smelled fresh, like manly-smelly soap and Tide laundry detergent. His t-shirt was soft against my cheek and his chest was surprisingly solid and warm. Even without seeing it, I could feel the lean muscle definition he had going on beneath the unassuming blue shirt.

He held me tightly for a moment and I thought I might have heard him exhale heavily before he gave me a quick squeeze and released me with an overly bright, friendly smile on his face. "See you tomorrow, same time, same bat channel," he said with a little smile.

"Tomorrow," I repeated with a dazed expression. He chuckled and waved to us as Kiley dragged me out the door by my hand.

We walked down the street in silence, which was unusual for my little chatterbox daughter. She was wise beyond her years, and I hated to think that our situation led to that, but she was still a happy, well-adjusted child who was wonderful in every way.

I watched her out of the corner of my eye and wondered what she was pondering so intensely as we approached her school. Finally, she got a determined look on her face and turned to me. "Mommy?"

I stopped and looked over at her. "Yeah?"

She screwed her eyes up tight and got an embarrassed look on her face. "I was just wonderin'..."

"About what?" I asked curiously.

She stared down at her feet. "Do you like Bagel Ben?" she asked quietly.

I felt the air stick in my throat, causing me to hack for a panicked moment. "Um, why would you ask that?" I asked desperately.

She peeked up at me. "Well, I was just wonderin' cuz you look at him the way Auntie Bella and Uncle Eddie look at each other when they think Maggie and I aren't looking."

I choked again and cleared my aching throat. "I have no idea what you're talking about," I replied firmly. Parenting 101: When in doubt, deny, deny, DENY!!

Kiley wasn't about to be put off by me so easily, which became obvious when she pouted up at me as if I'd disappointed her. "Mommy, are you gonna kiss him and stuff?"

I sighed and shook my head. "No, baby. Ben is just our friend, okay?"

She pouted for another moment. "Well, that sucks, cuz Uncle Eddie said..."

I cut her off, not willing to have this conversation. I refused to. "Honey bee, we're going to be late for school if we don't hurry," I urged. "Didn't you say Miss Bennett has a new story to read today?"

In her typical eight-year-old fashion, the new topic easily distracted her and we hurried the rest of the way to her elementary school. I dropped her off and headed over to the small shopping center down the street to pick up the last few items on Kiley's birthday wish list.

I spent the rest of the day trying to avoid thinking about Ben and his frosted dream peen.

The next three days passed quickly, but every morning at the bakery, Ben hugged me goodbye. I didn't know why he'd suddenly started doing it, but I found that I desperately looked forward to the moment he'd wrap his warm, steady arms around me and pull me in close. If I thought about it later on, I could still conjure up his smell, which made me inexplicably happy.

Each night, my dreams became increasingly...hotter. On Wednesday night, I awoke sweaty with the sheets twisted around my arms and legs. I cursed at my overactive imagination and decided to take a cool shower to slow my mojo, but the only thing that helped me get back to sleep was to give in to the fantasies I'd been entertaining.

With Ben's adorably sexy wink crossing my mind, I used my trusty pink vibrator to get myself off three times before I was able to fall back asleep. I'd never masturbated to the thought of someone I knew before, and it kind of surprised me.

On Friday, we went to the bakery for our breakfast, but we were running late so we didn't have time to stay and eat. Ben greeted us the same as he did every other day, but today his eyes linger on me longer than usual. It was as if he couldn't stop looking at me, and it made me shift uncomfortably, recalling my activities from Wednesday night.

Just as we were walking out the door, he called my name. I turned back in surprise and told Kiley to wait by the condiment bar for me. I don't know why I did this, but I didn't have time to question it as I crossed back to where he stood behind the counter. He was leaning on it, looking charming and sweet. "Yeah?" I asked, and the confusion came through my voice.

He smiled, looking nervous. "I was wondering..." he began.

I shifted, feeling nervous now, myself. "Yeah?"

"Do you think Kiley would mind if I brought someone to her party tomorrow?" he asked.

My stomach dropped to my feet and I had to battle the instant rampage of jealousy roping through my veins. I cleared my throat of the shock and struggled to find my normal voice. "Umm...yeah, I mean, no, go for it," I said lamely.

He looked relieved. "Good, because I think they'll really get along. Cady loves parties."

My stomach twisted and I struggled not to show my crushing disappointment. His eyes widened and he smacked his forehead. "Duh. I guess you don't know about Cady. She's my-"

I cut him off, saying we really had to get going, and that I'd see him at the party the next day. He looked like he wanted to say more, but I wasn't in any mood to hear about his lady friend. It was just too disappointing.

The next day, I woke up early and started cooking the food for the party. My mom went to pick up the birthday cake, and I found myself eying the box as if it were an unfaithful lover I wanted to spear through the heart. He made the cake. He hugged me every day this week.

He was bringing some party-loving tart to my daughter's birthday party.

I chopped, I fried, I assembled, I fumed. I ripped open bags with savage intent and grumbled darkly as I put the little bags of party favors together. Kiley was busy dancing around the apartment, singing along with The Little Mermaid.

When my mom called me into her room, I dragged my feet down the hall. I wasn't in the mood for her to lecture me today.

Listen to me. Twenty-six years old and dreading a lecture from my mother. Pitiful.

She stood next to her bed with a shopping bag in her hand. "I got you something to wear for the party today," she said.

She held the bag out to me and I groaned. "Mom..." I took the bag and pulled out the little red summer dress. It was a vibrant blood red, my favorite color, and strapless. It was cotton eyelet with an empire waist. It was beautiful.

The thing that shocked me the most about it, however, was that it was actually my style and not what my mother thought should be my style. I held it up and stared at it before I lowered my arms and smiled at her gratefully. "It's awesome. Thanks, mom."

She waved her hand off and tossed a shoe box on the bed. Without saying anything, she walked to the bedroom door and turned to shoot me her "I'm-about-to-impart-motherly-advice" look. "Angie, baby, I know you think that you're doing the right thing by waiting to date until Kiley's older, but I just don't want you to miss out on something...someone who could make you happy."

I dropped down to sit on the bed. "It's my job to make myself happy, mom. I don't subscribe to the idea that I can't be whole and fulfilled without a man in my life. Yeah, I get lonely sometimes, but Kiley is young and I don't want her to experience a parade of men coming in and out of her life."

My mom crossed the carpet and sat on the bed next to me. "I'm glad that you aren't waiting on a man, pumpkin, but I still worry about you. I see the way you look at Ben-"

"Ben?" I exclaimed incredulously. Blood rushed to my cheeks and I shot off the bed, clenching the dress in a tight grip now. "Is that what all this is about?" I asked indignantly, holding the dress up.

She looked me in the eye and stood up, standing a few inches away. "Ben is a good man, Angie. He's not going to disappoint you and break your heart like Eric did. You need to let yourself be open, love. Trust Ben. I know that all it would take is a nudge in the right direction, and you two could be so happy together-"

I raised my hand to cut her off. "I don't need a matchmaker. I need a mom." I was beginning to get frustrated now, because I was tired of her trying to meddle in my love life. "I wish you'd just let me live the way I need to, for myself and for Kiley."

She looked sad now, and I was hard-pressed not to crumble now. "Kiley needs a father, Ang. She needs someone who will be a strong role model."

"I'm a strong role model, mother!" I snapped in response. "I support my family, and I have a great relationship with her. I'm not the type of woman to marry someone just so my kid can have a new daddy."

My words were harsh, especially because my mom had remarried after my father's death when I was eleven. I wondered now if she truly loved my step-father, or if she'd merely married him because she wanted my sister and I to have a strong role model.

I watched her flinch and pinch her lips together. She looked straight at me. "I did what I had to do for you and your sister," she stated coldly.

I stepped back from her and sighed sadly. Her shoulders drooped and tears formed in her eyes. "Baby, it's not that I want you to marry someone just because. I want you to be open to falling in love. You have a chance; I just want you to take advantage of it and not let it slip through your hands."

Her words were heartfelt, and they cut through my anger. I relaxed my defensive stance. "I get what you're saying. Just...please stop trying to meddle. I'll do what I need to do," I assured her tiredly.

She nodded and I turned to leave so I could get ready for the party. She held the shoe box out to me and I took it from her with a sad smile. Her eyes still shone with tears when I closed the door behind me.

As soon as I was done getting ready for the party, I stood in front of the floor-length mirror in my bedroom and admired the view. My mom had good taste in dresses, because this one was a complete knockout.

Or rather, I was a knockout. My usually demure ego was pleased to say as I noted the way the deep red complimented my white skin and made my eyes appear huge and dark. I wasn't sure this dress was entirely appropriate for a nine-year-old's birthday party, but I didn't really mind because I wasn't going to change out of it now that I saw how nice it looked.

Part of me admitted that I really just wanted to look this good when Ben showed up with this Cady lady. Heh, Cady Lady.

I heard a knock on the door and glanced at the clock. The guests wouldn't be arriving for another hour, so I was confused. I walked to the door and opened it up to see Ben standing there in a blue-and-white plaid button up over dark jeans. He wore a brown belt with a big gold buckle and black Cons. His hair was slightly curly and messy, and his hazel eyes were twinkling with mirth.

I drooled, and not just in my mouth. Hot.

A petite girl around Kiley's age stepped out from behind him and smiled up at me excitedly. "Are you Kiley's mom?" she asked.

I stared down at her, trying to figure out what was going on here. I shot a confused look at Ben, but he smiled and shrugged. I looked back down at the girl and produced my best mommy smile. "Yep, I sure am," I replied.

She bounced up and held out a gift-wrapped box. "Uncle Ben was right! You are really pretty! Here's a present for Kiley. I'm really excited to meet her. We're gonna be friends. I told Uncle Ben because he tells me stories about her and so I know we're gonna be friends. Where is she?"

The little girl sure could chatter. I shot another glance at Ben and he smirked. "Angela, this is my niece Cady. Cady, this is Angela, Kiley's mom."

Cady. I wanted to bang my daft head against the wall, or at the very least, smack myself a few times and force myself to sit in the corner with a Dunce cap on. What a freaking jealous idiot I was!

I cleared my throat and opened the door wide, allowing them to enter. "It's nice to meet you, Cady. I'm sure you and Kiley will get along great. I believe she's in her room getting ready for the party," I replied, feeling a huge wave of relief.

Cady asked Ben if she could go meet Kiley, and he waved her off with a good-natured laugh. He turned to me and I saw his eyes widen a bit, as if he'd only now really looked at me. "Um, wow."

I swallowed nervously and felt a sudden attack of shyness. He'd never complimented my appearance before, and I wasn't sure how to react. I mean, other than jumping his bones on the living room floor, which would probably make me seem like a brazen hussy. "Thanks..." I mumbled, feeling my entire body blush as his eyes lingered on me.

He stepped closer and I held my breath, waiting for whatever would happen next. My pulse was pounding, the blood roaring in my ears. He was close enough to reach out and touch me now, but I wasn't sure if he meant to or not.

My question was answered when his hand ran down my arm and gripped my hand in his. "Angela, I..."

"Mommy! Guess what! Cady has a horse and she gets to ride it whenever she wants!" Kiley yelled as she came running out of her bedroom holding onto Cady's hand.

I sighed in disappointment as Ben released my hand and stepped back until there was an appropriate distance between us once more. His eyes were burning into my skin as I bent down to suggest to Kiley that she show Cady the small back yard outside our apartment. She readily agreed and they went bounding out the back door.

Before I could say anything, Ben was in front of me and his arms were around my waist. I looked up at him in shock, but his eyes were dark and I was speechless. "Angela..." he sighed as his head bent low and his eyes slid closed. My own eyes shut as his lips brushed against mine. I could taste his toothpaste, cinnamon and sweet. I opened my mouth a bit, and he tugged me toward him before deepening the kiss a bit.

The moment our tongues said their "how do you do's?" the back door opened, a knock sounded on the door, and my mom walked out to see what everyone was up to. Ben jumped back and we both avoided looking at anyone.

Luckily, the girls didn't see anything, but I saw my mom smiling smugly in my peripheral vision.

The party was crazy, but Ben stuck by my side, helping with the games, presents, and messes. My friends loved him, and by the end of the day, I was already a little bit in love with him, myself.

After everyone departed, my mom informed me (with a very significant look) that she was going to take the girls to a movie and then out for a special birthday dinner. Ben agreed and they left in a sugar-induced euphoria. I told Ben I was going to change so I could start cleaning up.

I was halfway across the living room before I felt him grab my arm and spin me around. I was so surprised that I didn't see it coming when he bent down to seal my lips with the hottest kiss I'd ever experienced.

When you considered the fact that I'd only been with two other men, it didn't really come as a surprise to me.

His mouth was warm and wet, and he tasted like cake and vanilla ice cream. I moaned into his mouth and he slipped his tongue inside, teasing and tempting me. I reached my arms up around his shoulders and ran my fingers through his messy hair.

Ben's hands were warm and solid on my back, making me feel safe and desired at the same time. I'd never felt this sense of security and trust with someone, and it was an eye-opening experience.

I knew I was probably rushing things, and that I may come to regret it, but I just couldn't help myself. I pulled away from him and I saw such happiness and need reflected in his beautiful hazel eyes that I knew my mind was made up.

I took his hand and led him back towards my bedroom. When we reached the door, I reached out to flick the switch that turned on my bedside table lamp. Ben followed me, his hand tugging against mine. "Are you sure?" he asked earnestly as I turned to smile up at him.

Watching him stand there with that adorable sincerity covering his face, while his eyes burned for me and a rather impressive erection pressed against his close-fitting jeans was enough to cement my decision. Without a word, I reached back and unzipped my dress, allowing it to fall down my body.

I stepped from the dress and stood before him in my strapless black bra and silky black boyshorts. His eyes nearly bugged out of his head, and I gave him the sexiest smile I could muster.

My confidence surprised the hell out of me, quite frankly, but it just felt...right...standing here in front of Ben this way. I felt as if I was offering myself up, and I had complete faith that he would treat me well.

Everything I knew about this man reassured me as I stood there, waiting for him to make the next move. I watched him carefully, daring him to touch me, kiss me, take me to bed and free me from the celibacy I'd forced upon myself all these years.

Finally, finally, he came forward and brushed his fingertips across my collarbone and up my neck until his hand cupped my cheek. He bent his head forward and laid a soft kiss on my mouth. "Thank you," he whispered against my lips.

"For what?" I asked, confused.

He smiled down at me gently. "For trusting me. For giving me the chance to hold you and show you how I feel about you," he replied simply.

Ben's words were simple, yet so heartfelt that I felt my stomach clench with the knowledge that whatever happened between us tonight would change my life, for better or for worse. Now that I was here with him this way, it felt so easy and right that it was hard to imagine how we'd ever been any other way.

His mouth was on mine again, and he had a hand buried in my hair. His other hand was stroking up and down my side, causing shivers to race up my spine. I reached down to pull his shirt up over his head and he left some space between us so I could get it all the way off.

I was a little bit surprised to see how well-defined his arms and chest were now that he was shirtless. I'd felt his lean muscles beneath clothes, but I never imagined that he'd be this sexy underneath everything. I ran my hands up and down, savoring the feel of his skin beneath my fingertips. It was his turn to moan into my mouth, and I welcomed it with undeniable glee.

His hands dropped to my waist, only to wrap around and grip my ass. He pulled me up against him and ground himself against me, and his skin was hot against mine. I reached down to unbutton his pants, and he reached behind me to unclasp my bra.

He tossed my bra away and I pushed his pants down, exposing his black boxers. I licked my lips in anticipation when I saw his dick tenting the fabric. Now that we were here like this, I was impatient to feel him. I couldn't wait.

I walked backwards until my knees met the bed, and he bent low over me. His feet were still planted on the floor. He had one hand behind my back and the other wrapped firmly in my hair as his tongue massaged mine in an increasingly erotic way. I arched up against him, feeling breathless. My panties were already soaking wet, and he was rubbing himself against me.

My hands ran down his back, scratching ever so slightly, until they reached his boxers. I bent my knees and put my feet flat on the bed, caging his hips between my thighs as I pushed his boxers off. They caught on his cock, but I reached in to free it and gasped when I wrapped my hand around him.

He broke the kiss and looked down at me, looking worried. "You okay? Did I hurt you?" he asked.

I laughed. "Um, not yet, but I think I just freed Willy..."

Ben's laugh bounced off the walls. "That's a first," he chuckled.

Still gripping him, even though I couldn't get my hand all the way around his girth, I arched my hips up so I could press the head against my panty-clad wetness. "I'll probably walk funny for a week, but it'll be worth it," I quipped, suddenly feeling saucy.

His eyes slid shut as he pushed back against me. I needed to get these panties out of the way pronto. I arched my hips up and he got the memo, his fingers sliding beneath the silky fabric and tugging them down my legs before he dropped them.

We were both completely naked now, and I thanked my lucky stars that I was on the pill, because I didn't want anything to come between us right now. He pushed me back onto the bed and crawled up after me until we were in position. He hovered above me, looking in my eyes with such tenderness that I worried I'd weep like a crazy woman any moment now.

My legs fell open and he held his breath as he slipped inside of me. My eyes drifted shut and I wrapped my arms around him, bringing him as close as I could. "Oh, Ben...it's so good," I whisper-moaned.

"I know," he replied in a reverent tone as he began to move gently. He was really big, and it had been a long time for me, so it hurt a bit at first...but knowing that I was here with him made it an exciting, welcome pain that merely added to my overall pleasure.

The pain drifted away as we moved together, wrapped securely around each other. His lips smoothed a path down my neck and over my chest. He rolled us so I was on top and he was in a sitting position. His lips and tongue worked on my nipples, shooting darts of pleasure straight to my pussy and causing me to cry out. He had one hand in my hair and the other on my hip, rocking me back and forth at a furious pace now.

I opened my eyes to look down at him, and I moaned at what I saw. My Ben, my adorable, funny, dependable Ben looked as sexy as sin. His eyes were dark and intense, his face was a mask of concentration and pleasure, and his mouth was open slightly as he watched my breasts bounce inches away from his hot gaze.

The bed rocked and squeaked beneath us, and it made everything in me burn hotter. I wanted to rock this bed every night with him. His left hand came up and pinched my nipple as his right hand began rubbing my clit. He looked up at me and licked his lips. "I want to feel you come," he said deeply.

I felt myself clench around him, and he shot up so he was on top of me once more. One of my legs was up over his shoulder while the other wrapped around his waist, and he began a pounding rhythm that was relentless and delicious. I came hard and he shouted my name as he filled me up.

He collapsed on top of me, and I held him close, unwilling to let him go. I shifted my legs and we stayed like that for a while before I remembered that the girls and my mom would probably be home soon. I reminded him of this and we reluctantly got up to take a shower.

After we were both decent once more, Ben helped me clean the apartment. Just as we were finishing up, we heard the girls coming down the hall. He turned to me and cupped my face, bringing me in for a sweet kiss. "I want to see you," he informed me.

I felt my heart skip a beat. "I want to see you, too," I replied with a smile.

He kissed me again and his eyes were serious on mine. "Listen, Angela, I want to be completely honest with you."

"What do you mean?" I asked, my heart stuttering now.

He looked to the door and I felt the urgency climb for him to explain himself. "I'm all in on this. You and Kiley both mean a lot to me, and I want you to know that I'll always be here for you, no matter what happens between us. If, for some crazy reason, you and I don't work out, I'd never desert Kiley. I love her just as much as I love Cady, and I could never do that to her. I know her father ran away, but I'm not that guy. I'm here, for however long you'll have me."

I stood, completely stunned. "How'd you know about Eric?" I asked suspiciously. His other words meant a great deal to me, but I was just taken off guard that he knew about Kiley's father.

He looked away. I could hear the girls getting closer. "Your mom told me about a year ago. I know you guys were young, and I'm sure it was scary, but that doesn't excuse him from deserting you. I can't say I'm sorry you're single, though I'd like to change that."

His eyes met mine again and I didn't know what to say. He was saying all the right things, and I couldn't ignore the feeling swelling in my heart. It was hope.

"Look, I just thought you should know that you can trust me, that's all," he explained. His face was so sincere and nervous that it melted my brain freeze in an instant.

"I do trust you. You're a wonderful man, Ben. I'd be a fool not to realize that," I told him. He pulled me in for another kiss, bringing me a deep sense of belonging and safety.

As the door opened, Kiley squealed. "I knew it!!! Mommy's gonna marry Bagel Ben!"

And what do you know? She was totally right.

A/N: This was fun to write, so I hope y'all liked it. Kiley is named after the band Rilo Kiley, because Jenny Lewis is just as cute as a button and I love her. Pictures of my inspiration for Angela and Ben will be on my profile. :)