Sea of Love - Cat Power

I grabbed his hand and pulled him along behind me. This was the least I could do before I left. I paused at the edge of the water, my boots abandoned before the sand, which now coated my feet. I took one step into the water, then another, until we were both waist deep in the water. "Matt." My voice cracked on his name, and I could already feel the tears forming in my eyes.

Shit.

I took both of his hands in mine, and just stared at them until my mouth could catch up with my heart. When it did, I just felt like I wanted to cry. "Matt. I love you. I really, really do. No matter what I say, will say, do or will do. Don't forget that." I began to choke on the words, so left it at that.

Matt softly pulled me into an embrace, stroking my hair until I calmed down a bit. "I love you too. You know that by now though." He pressed a kiss into my forehead. "You should also know I'll forgive you for anything you do. I'll follow you anywhere." He cupped his hand in the water, and poured it over both our heads. The water felt cold, as it trickled down my face. "Doesn't this prove it to you?" He kissed me again, gently, and the guilt tore at my stomached.

Yes, he would follow me anywhere. Which was the reason why I would not allow myself to bring him along.

Get Loose – The Salads

The bass shook my core, and I could feel the floor vibrate when I feet where on the ground. My arms were in the air, gliding down my leather clad torso, in my hair, around his waist, pulling him closer. His soft lips were pressed against my jaw, then my cheek, his teeth nipped at my ear. His red hair tickled, and mixed in with my blonde strands. I didn't care, I wanted him closer.

I walked him backwards to the bar to get some shots. I could feel the stares on us as I still ground my hips into his against the bar. So I did it a bit harder and felt him moan against me. The stares were drowned out in the alcohol, and we went back to the dance floor.

It had been a while since I felt so...free. Loose. Like everything in the world except for Matt mattered. I almost didn't want to leave, and at the thought of doing so, I just downed another glass.

Swinging – Headstones

The rope felt rough under the soft pads of my fingers, it had already torn a hole in my lace glove. I no longer cared though. Appearances were only kept for him- and now...My nails dug into my palm. I could feel the blood drip down, but I paid it no mind. He was gone. I still needed to say it out loud, to finalize it. Because even as I thought about the different ways to commit suicide, it still didn't seem like he was dead. Maybe the fact I drowned out the information in vodka and pink sugary drinks the moment I heard about it. I looked down at the ugly rope once again.

The thought of my body swinging from this rope crossed my mind. Then I put the rope down. Although appearances were for him, I was used to keeping them, even until my death. The rope would leave unsightly marks along my skin.

I needed to think of something better.

I sat in the tub; the water had long since lost its warmth. I sunk lower until my mouth was below the water line. The lower, until the black bow atop my head was submersed as well. I waited, and then gasped the air as I pushed myself up from the water.

If I died this way, I would be blue. I might even expand from the water. I refused to look like that. Ever.

As peered down over my platform boots at the ground below I realized that maybe hanging may have left me more beautiful in death than jumping. The thought of a bloody corpse spattered across the pavement disturbed me, more so than the fact that I would be the corpse. The radio came from the room below my feet. Soft piano played gently in the air. I felt myself lean forward, as if to hear the music better. Then I let myself go. I couldn't continue to stop what would happen soon anyways. I wouldn't care what I looked like when I hit the ground anyways.

Sick Muse – Metic

I moved my arm. Just to hear the sound of the chain that attached the beautiful man and myself. He frowned, and scowled at me again. "L, how many times must I tell you to not move the chain? You know how hard it is to concentrate with it constantly making noise." He looked really cute when he was mad, his lips sticking out a bit more then normal. "I apologise Light. I never knew I had a twitchy hand before this." He rolled his eyes at me and when back to work.

He had no idea how hard it was to work with his presence distracting me, so close, but unattainable. After all he refused to acknowledge the fire between us, opting for the blonde instead. He chose the male fantasy over his own, even if he wasn't happy with it.

Hook Me Up – The Veronicas

I panted against the stranger as he pushed his leg between mine, "Ahh-right there." I moaned, closing my eyes from who it was, and just focused on the touch. This is what I craved, feeling, of being felt. I could feel him turned on by everything I did, or gasped. "Yeah, that's right ginger, moan for me." I pulled him down into another desperate kiss to shut him up. After all, the only think I needed from him was the sex. It didn't matter who it was, where, how, or who was watching. It didn't matter, because after all, no one could ever compare to the blonde of my fantasy.

Notion – Kings of Leon

I stared up uneasily into his dark eyes. I skilfully covered the anxiety I carried with anger. After all, L had me pinned to the floor in a fight. Unfortunately my mind had wander from other ways we could get into this position. A passionate relationship was the top of my list, followed by a violent relationship and a one night stand. I couldn't deny the fact I was attracted to him, as I pushed him off me, I tried to not focus on how his body felt too much. I still needed to keep up the mask of the fact I was straight after all. Maybe I can become the unfaithful bi boyfriend to Misa. I had always had an idea that I was more attracted to men more than women, but when I meet L, it just cemented that idea into who I was.

The chain pulled me towards him as he swung back to punch me, and I accidently fell into a kiss.

Windowsill – Arcade Fire

The TV was playing something from the other room, and I didn't try to make out the words. I didn't want to hear the noise, or see the light flash and change on the hallway wall. I didn't want to know the fact that when the clock chimed midnight, my father would come into my room. I didn't want to know that I would have to choose to be beaten or taken. I would always choose the latter; it was easier to hide from others. I would refuse to let them know what he does to me.

I would escape from here before they even knew.

At the police station they asked for my name and address. I gave them my new name and told them that I no longer had a place to go back to. It had burnt down to the ground, along with my only relative. I could still feel the flames on me, heat tickling my skin, smoke smothering me. But it was worth it. I could never forgive that man. He should have realized it himself, he knew how smart I was, and how much havoc I could create.

I began to fiddle with the rosary around my neck. I guess I would always have a war with that I could, and would to, compared to what I should do to go to heaven. At least if I went to hell, the rest of the world would keep me company.

Ella Elle L'A – Kate Ryan

I don't know what makes him special. He just is; from his twisted smile, his dark eyes that have seen too much, his competiveness or rage when he realises that I can better than him. Maybe how he is so loud, when I am quite, and forgotten in the background. He radiates this power from him, one that just makes him everything. Maybe that is why he wears black; it is all the colors combined. Because that is what he is, what he knows. Maybe it is because I wear white, and then the two of us are opposites. Opposites attract after all.

Maybe that is why I get a satisfaction out of beating him, just barely. To let him know he is not the best at everything, he is not everything.

Even if he is my everything.

Romantic Rights (The Phones Lovers Remix) – Death From Above 1979

I was used to Mello wearing his leather, and even though it was sexy as hell, and clung to his ass like skin, it apparently wasn't cutting it. My mouth dried and then watered at the sight of Mello as he stepped out of the bedroom into the main area of the apartment in a new outfit. The thigh high three inch heels seemed to be tighter than any of his pants. I don't know how he managed to zip them up without it cutting into the pale flesh of his leg. The boots skimmed the bottom of one of my baggy old striped shirts, too large at the neck exposing a bare shoulder and the most delicate should bone. "Fuck." I stated as the unlit fag fell from my mouth. He strutted over, in the sexiest way possible for a 5'7'' man in heels, and slowly sat down on my lap, straddling me. The hem of the shirt rose up slightly to revel more of his perfect thigh and I felt the heat going down to my groin. His hands travelled along my chest as he breathed into my ear before biting it "That is what I intend on doing."

Infinity [Klaas Vocal Mix] – Guru Josh Project

I rolled over on the mattress so that I was facing him. Although half his face was covered by the pillow it was resting on, he still held every inch of chaotic perfection that I loved him for. His dark eyes bore into my as I gave a sleepy smile. "Still awake?" I knew that he always would be, even after being chained together for so long, I had never seen him sleep. The bags under his eyes confirmed what I thought. He brought a hang up to my cheek before his cool fingers traced over my face softly, moving their way into my hair. "I will be until you sleep." He curled into my, and pressed an innocent kiss onto my temple. "So sweet dreams Light-kun." As his fingers helped me drift off to sleep, I kept thinking that it almost seemed like L would be awake for eternity.