Notes: beware of OOC; I owe this to great shows like Animaniacs and The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy
Disclaimer: Still don't own Teen Titans or anything else in the story
That's Not Normal
Robin's birthday was coming soon and the other Titans rushed to prepare. The gifts were bought, but Cyborg and Beast Boy felt something was missing.
So the pair and Starfire went out to get the one thing you'd never think to see at a teenager's b-day party: a clown. The trio found the cheapest one they could get and met with him.
"See it's Rob's birthday, so we want you to surprise him," explained Cy.
"Oh, I just love making a surprise!" the clown enthusiastically replied.
The three Titans exchanged looks, but continued. They told the clown everything he needed to know like where to go, how to get there, and when to be there.
With that said and done, the Titans left.
"This will be a glorious surprise for Robin!" shouted Star.
"I don't know," said BB, "That clown kind of creeped me out."
"Who cares? It's for Robin. Of course we'll get a laugh out of it I'm sure," said Cy.
In a few minutes they were back at the tower where Raven was waiting.
"Robin's in his room," Rae said, "Are we ready?"
"Yep, so get him, Star," instructed Cyborg.
Star giggled as she flew through the halls towards Robin's room. She went in without knocking and grabbed Robin.
"Star, could you please tell me why you're dragging me to the living room?" asked Rob.
"You shall see."
She then pushed him through the door way.
"Surprise!" yelled BB and Cy.
"Yeah, surprise," muttered Raven.
Star gave Robin a bone crushing hug.
"Happy day of your birth, beloved friend who is a boy Robin!"
"Uh, thanks. I think," Rob said.
"Can we eat now?" asked BB.
Cy didn't reply since he already started eating ice cream and hot dogs.
"Hey, no fair!" protested BB.
"You don't have to eat like pigs you know," said Raven as she sat down.
"I brought the crown of meat," said Star.
Robin blew out the candles on his cake and everyone had their fill.
"Hey," said Cy, "Let's play hide and seek."
"This isn't Robin's fifth birthday. Can't we do something else?" Rae replied.
"I wish to play the seek and hide game, Robin. Please can we?" Star begged.
Robin of course always fell for Star's puppy dog pout.
"Alright, let play."
"Yay!"
"Robin's it!" BB yelled as he ran off grabbing Raven by the arm.
Cy and Star followed close behind as they looked for a place to hide.
"I always fall for the puppy dog pout," Robin said to himself, "Oh well, better start. One, three, five, seven, nine, ten, fifteen, twenty…"
The other four Titans hid themselves the one place Rob wouldn't look, outside next to a window, so they could see Robin, but Rob couldn't see them.
"I am so excited," Star said.
"Hey, Cy," BB said, "Isn't it almost time for you know what?"
"Oh, yeah. It is about time he gets here."
"Who?" asked Raven.
"The clown," stated Cy.
"Robin doesn't like clowns."
"How do you know?"
"I've been inside his head and he told me so. I myself hate clowns."
"Robin's afraid of clowns?" asked BB.
"Not so much fear as paranoia," replied Raven.
"Uh oh," BB and Cy replied.
"Ready or not, here I come," said Rob.
Just then there was a knock at the door.
"Who could that be?"
He opened the door to see staring him in the face a…
"Hello there, birthday boy!" the clown exclaimed.
"CLOWN!"
Robin quickly slammed the door in the clown's face, literally.
"That hurt," said the clown, and he knocked again.
"CLOWN!"
"Open up, masked boy."
"Go away!"
"I'm sorry, do I make with fright and scare? You shouldn't be afraid of me, masked boy. I'm just a clown."
The clown pulled out a microphone.
"When you want to scream put away that frown, and never be scared of a clown."
Robin opened the door to smack the clown with his staff and sent him flying several feet away. Rob then leapt back inside and shut the door.
The clown landed on a rock and slid to the ground in a heap.
"I wish the ground was mushy and soft."
Cy and BB were trying to suppress their laughter as they saw Robin darting around the room in a panic. Despite the setback, the clown continued to gain entrance.
He walked up to the door.
"Oh masked boy, I'll make balloon aminals."
He pulled out some balloons.
"Look, a kitty. Meow."
"Oh, how cute." Star quietly said aloud.
"Go away!" Rob shrieked.
"Look, a puppy. Bark woof bark."
"Can you make a little person out of balloons?" asked Robin.
"I think so," replied the clown.
He grabbed several balloons and shaped into a person.
"Ta da!"
"Can I see it?" asked Rob.
"Here you go."
The door barely opened to let Rob reach out and grab the balloon person, only for him to hand it back to the clown.
"Hey, you drew a mask on it. You also gave him a little, shiny disc to hold in his hand. What's it for?"
The clown was answered in that split second by having the disc explode in his face.
"It blowed up at me," he said as he collapsed.
Needless to say, it was getting harder for Cy and BB to stop from laughing. That is until the clown attempted to leave.
"I've gotta go home."
"Hey, clown," said Cy, "I paid for an hour show."
"But the masked boy hurts with the sticks and the booms."
"Get back to that tower."
"Please no, I'm not a well clown."
"Go!" Cy shouted with his sonic cannon armed.
"Yeah, bye," the clown said as he went back to the tower.
"Boy is that clown gonna get it," said BB.
"Should we not stop this?" asked Star.
Cy and BB looked at her for a minute. Then they broke down with laughter.
"Men," said Rae, "Well, whatever."
So after a short while, the clown was back.
"Oh, masked boy, I've got my little clown car. Wanna see it?"
The door opened.
"The nice boy opened the door," the clown said as he drove in.
He then saw a sign that was pointing towards the elevator, so the clown drove in. There was another sign inside saying which floor to go to.
When he arrived he zoomed out until he found a room labeled 'Robin' on the door. That door opened as well and the clown drove through, only to find himself in midair.
"I'm in the sky."
Indeed he was several dozen feet above the ground and he now plummeted to impact with it. The enormous fall destroyed the car and knocked the clown senseless.
"I don't wanna do this no more."
Yet, the clown was back again despite the fact his arm was in a sling and his foot in a cast. He softly tapped on the door.
"Masked boy, are you there?"
The door opened and the clown flinched.
"Don't with the booms!"
He looked up to see an empty room.
"Does this mean no booms?"
The clown walked in and the door suddenly shut. It was Robin and the room was actually a small ship that was ready to take off.
"So long, clown," Rob said with triumph as he pressed the button.
The ship blasted of far away into the distance. The others chose this moment to come out of hiding. Cy and BB were laughing their heads off, Raven was fighting to hide a smile, and Star looked worried.
"Are you well, Robin?" Star asked.
"I had to get rid of the clown," Rob replied.
"I can't believe you freak out around clowns," Cy chuckled.
They all went inside.
"Dude, I know Joker's a clown, but this one was completely harmless," BB said, "Aside from the fact that he was really weird."
"Laugh all you want, but I know what I'm doing," Robin replied.
"Acting like an idiot," said Raven.
"I'm telling you guys," Robin shot back, "Clowns are the ultimate evil! They wanna be the dominant species on the planet and they'll destroy us all to make it happen! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all!"
It went on like that for awhile. Robin kept screaming 'Destroy us all!' and the others walked away. Still Rob kept shouting the same thing and kept doing it for the longest time.
The other four Titans tried to ignore him, but it proved difficult. Cy and BB couldn't really play video games when Robin kept screaming, "Destroy us all!"
The time seemed to drag on as Robin still wouldn't shut up with his rant. It was only a matter of time before someone cracked. That someone was Raven.
She stood up, stomped over to Robin, grabbed him by the shirt and pushed him down onto the couch.
"Listen to me, you imbecile," she hissed, "I've had enough of this. Now repeat after me. A clown is my friend."
Robin didn't respond until he saw Raven's eyes start glowing.
"A clown is my friend," he said.
"A clown will not bite me and throw me in the basement."
"A clown will not bite me and throw me in the basement."
"A clown is not a big spider."
"A clown is not a big spider."
Just then a spider landed on Robin. Robin gave a shout. The spider crawled to the ground and morphed back to Beast Boy.
"That was too easy," BB laughed.
"You're not helping," Rae said.
"Sorry, dear," BB quickly replied.
Rae then turned back to Robin.
"Get over this stupid paranoia of clowns. You're annoying everyone and scaring Starfire. She's worried about you."
That seemed to hit Robin as hard as he hit the clown.
"Where is Star?" he asked.
"Come on in, Star," Rae said.
Star was on the other side of the door. She came in and Robin held out his arms. Star went in for a hug.
"Are you alright, Robin?"
"Yes, Star. I'm sorry I worried you. And thanks, Raven."
"Don't mention it."
"So where did you send the clown?" asked BB.
"Probably somewhere near Gotham so he'd be considered a criminal and locked away."
"Still," Cy said, "You've gotta admit that was hilarious."
Then Cyborg stared laughing. BB soon joined in. Raven couldn't keep a straight face and stared laughing as well. Star couldn't resist laughing either.
Robin looked around and then he started laughing too.
"Now this is a birthday party," Rob said.
"Indeed," said Star as she gave him a kiss.
"Hey, Rob," said Cy, "You wanna smack this clown piñata?"
The piñata was covered in black energy and exploded. Candy went flying everywhere.
"Let's just skip to the candy," Rae said.
"That's why I love her," BB replied scooping up candy.
Afterwards the Titans watched a movie and had some more fun. So all in all it was a pretty good day. And, aside from Beast Boy, not a clown was seen at the tower again.