I Call Her Babe

I call her Babe, most days. It's easier than calling her by name, well, easier on me. Babe lets me slot her neatly into the compartment in my mind for "generic female I want to sleep with". Well, try to slot her in there. I try to just focus on that pert ass, deliciously soft and round because of all those Tastykakes she eats. Calling her Stephanie makes me see all of her. The way she seems to laugh at the day to day insanity of life. The devotion she shows to her family and friends. Her fierce courage. The crooked smile she gets when she sees me…

I don't even think she knows she does it, that smile. Morelli, he knows. It's why he hates me so much. If it weren't for that smile he would be sure he wouldn't lose her to me. But she lights up when she sees me – and Morelli and I both know it.

I never meant to love her. It's a pain in my ass being in love with her. She's distracting. She's constantly in danger and, let's face it, she's a lousy bounty hunter. She's trashed more cars than three demolition derbies.

I wasn't happy when Vinnie asked me to look out for her. The little weasel had said, "She's family. My Grandma Plum would kill me if I let her get hurt." Since he'd been my primary source of income back then I'd agreed. I thought she'd quit within a week. Not her. Babe has a stubborn streak like a bulldog. Even when that bastard Ramirez went after her she didn't back off. I could respect that.

Then I got to know her and, yeah, want her. She's an armful of soft, molten woman, when I can get her in my arms. I know I should let her go, let her be with Morelli. No matter what she thinks, she's the sort to settle down and have a family. She deserves that dream and I can't give it to her even though I've settled down as much as I can for her. Who ever thought I'd be a reputable business owner, in the security business no less? But it'll never be a 9 – 5 job and I'll never be able to stay in Trenton with her. Can you see me in some duplex in the 'Burg, mowing the lawn and taking out the trash?

Still, I can't give her up. She's the one weakness I allow myself and why shouldn't I? She makes me smile. A man like me, he doesn't have a lot of reasons to smile.