**
This story has been bouncing around in my head for awhile. I was a bit…disappointed with the 7th book (FRED! DOBBY!), so I dropped the idea for awhile. But, the release of the 6th movie reminded me of it again, so I re-read Harry Potter 1-3 and debating whether on reading 4. I plan on re-writing the Harry Potter 1-3 and maybe 4 with a father figure in Harry's life. Much of the events will be the same, but at the same time…different… possibly different pairings…not sure about that yet :)to find out R&R!
**
DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN HARRY, LILY, JAMES, RON, HERMIONE, JAMES, DUMBLEDORE, LUPIN, SIRIUS, PETTIGREW, SNAPE, FRED, GEORGE, MCGONAGALL, FLITWICK, ANY TYPE OF DRAGON, PERCY, BILL, CHARLIE, MR. AND MRS. WEASLEY, HAGRID, ANY GHOSTS/ POLTERGISTS, THREE HEADED DOGS, A HUGE DOG, DEVIL SNARE, MOVING CHEST PIECES, TROLLS, VOLDEMORT (thankfully) CRABBE, GOYLE, MALFOY, MR. AND MRS. MALFOY, QUIRREL, TOM, FUDGE, GINNY, NEVILLE, MAGICAL BROOMSTICKS, WIZARD GOLD, MAGICAL STONES, REALLY BIG BOOKS, OR ANY KIND OF HARRY POTTER RELATED THINGS OR MAGIC!! THIS IS JUST ME WRITING A FANFICTION IN AU TO GIVE HARRY A BIT OF A BREAK
**
Night-time came around, lighting the sky with a crescent moon which cradled the bright stars. It was seemingly a perfect night. But, as one discovers throughout their lifetime, looks can be deceiving.
The perfect night was observed by James Potter, as he kissed his wife, Lily, goodbye in the hallway by the front door.
"It's a beautiful night." He said softly, gazing into her startling green eyes as the comment left his lips. A blush tainted her delicate cheekbones and a smile twitched her lips.
"Maybe to the father who gets a break from baby duty." She quipped, but the good humour remained prominent on her face. James grinned and tweaked his young son, Harry's nose. The young boy giggled, blinking two large green eyes that were exact copies of his mother's.
"The Order calls." He said quietly. The humour faded from Lily's face immediately.
"I thought you were going to work! Why?"
"He's been sighted Lily. I want to help catch him, so that we can come out of hiding! I want Harry to have a normal life!" Lily's jaw steeled.
"And you think he would have a normal life without his father around? You can't always play the hero James!"
"I'm not trying to be heroic Lily! We knew the risks and the responsibilities that would fall to us when we volunteered to join the order!" James fought not to raise his voice. That would upset Harry.
"I know." A defeated note crept into her voice. "But that was before Harry." She turned the full force of her expression onto James. "I don't want my son to grow up without knowing who his father was." James kissed his wife and son on the cheek.
"I'm not going anywhere. I trust Sirius. We'll be okay." Lily nodded, glancing downwards, a guilty expression crossing her face before she whispered,
"Okay." James grinned again.
"Don't wait up for me. I'll be back late."
"Like I really have a choice whether I'll be up for you or not." She joked. "Harry hasn't slept a full night yet." James tousled his son's already jet black ruffled hair.
"You'll be a good boy tonight eh Harry? Your Mom has you all to herself tonight and I'm pretty sure she'd like two hours of sleep." As if on cue, Harry yawned widely, revealing two fully grown in teeth. James grinned and glanced out the window.
"Go on James. I'm going to get Harry to bed while he's tired." Lily said softly. James felt a smile tug at the corner of his mouth. She always knew what to say.
"Bye honey." He said, turning, opening the door and vanishing with a loud pop.
**
After her husband left, Lily acted on her word and brought her young son up to his bedroom. Putting him in his crib, she watched lovingly as he stretched out inside his crib. "I love you Harry. Sweet dreams." She whispered, running her hand through his downy, already erratic hair. His adorable face stretched in another huge yawn and his eyes fluttered closed. Lily took the opportunity to pull his quilted blanket up to his chest and tuck him in. Then, backing away slowly, she left his room; closing the door gently behind her.
Lily retreated to hers and James' room, as always, letting her eyes skim over their wedding picture as she entered the room. Sighing, she sank down onto their bed, burying her face in her hands. She had no doubt that James was the love of her life, but his thirst to catch Voldemort had been growing ever since they both joined the Order. She understood his reasoning, she wanted it too. But sometimes, she felt it had grown to be an unhealthy obsession for him. Hopefully, the members of the order would ensure the safety of her husband. Like Severes. A pang went through her as she thought of her childhood friend. Their friendship had suffered once they arrived at Hogwarts, mostly due to the enmity between their houses, Gryffindor and Slythrin. Peer pressure also played its part. She had Severes had not spoken since he had called her a mudblood. Rubbing her eyes, Lily realized just how tired she really was. Curling up on her bed, she took advantage of one of Harry's rare slumber to get some sleep of her own.
An explosion startled Lily out of her sleep. Jolting up, she fumbled for her wand, which was hidden underneath some books inside her night table to prevent Harry from accidently stumbling across it. She raced to the edge of the stairs in time to see a black cloaked figure glide into the doorway after busting down the door. Lily went cold and her grip tightened on her wand. They had been betrayed. The black cloaked figure glanced up, his face completely hidden by the hood of the cloak.
"Lily Potter." It hissed. He raised his wand. Lily evaded the first spell, still in shock. James, hurry! She begged. A flash of green light zipped past her ear, warning her to keep moving. She turned towards the intruder, trying to bury the look of fear and shock that was surely evident on her face.
"Voldemort," she said coldly. She couldn't see the sneer that surely accompanied his raspy laugh.
"How sweet, a mother protecting her child." Lily ground her teeth, knowing her chances of making it out alive were slim to none. Trembling, she thought of her infant son two rooms down, who was wisely being quiet for the moment.
"You will not touch my son!" She screamed, aiming a disarming spell at him. With a lazy flick of his wand, Voldemort blocked the spell. A panic set in and Lily felt a new wave of fear wash over her. Not for herself, but for Harry. Oh God please protect Harry! She prayed, trying to formulate a plan that would outcome in her son's safety.
"You have no chance." Voldemort said silkily. "You know why I'm here. Give me the boy and you can pick if you want to die first or second." Lily's gripped her wand in her clammy hand pretending to consider, before whipping her wand back to scream,
"Expelliarmus!" She caught him by surprise. Voldemort was thrown back again the wall by the force of her spell. Not stopping there, she drew her wand back up and yelled, "Incendio!" causing a burst of flames to explode out of her wand. Voldemort blocked them again, casting them to the side. Their wooden railing caught the flames, nourishing it until it spread on the carpet and various other objects. Lily steeled her position. She had to end this now, before the fire reached Harry's room. Her eyes never left Voldemort's figure as he stood. She lifted her wand once more, but was too late.
"Avada Kedarva!" Voldemort spat. She dodged it, her heart pounding to the point it felt like it would jump out of her chest.
"Waddiwasi!" Lily yelled, causing the hallway mirror to shoot toward Voldemort at a deadly speed.
"Confrigo!" Voldemort shouted, shattering the mirror when it was a metre away from him. Broken glass flew everywhere. Lily covered her head with her arms as she felt multiple pieces slice through her clothes and skin.
"Breaking a mirror," Lily panted as she stood up on shaky legs, "Seven years bad luck." Voldemort let out a cold, harsh laugh.
"I don't need good luck to kill you," he flicked his wand lazily again, "Crucio!" Lily dodged by jumping off to the side and slamming into the wall. She gritted her teeth in pain and stole a quick glance to the window, hoping, praying, that James would show up with the Order. Voldemort noticed her desperate expression. His face twisted into a sneer and Lily noticed for the first time that his hood no longer covered his face. She fought back a wave of nausea.
"Where is your husband Lily?" He gloated. "Did he leave you alone? With the impression that you were safe?" His face was still frozen in a sneer.
"You don't know anything!" Lily snapped, "Expulso!" The spell hit Voldemort in the chest and sent him flying back against the wall again. He struggled back up, his face no longer holding an expression of gloating but a mask of fury.
"You'll regret that mudblood." He hissed. Lily's blood boiled.
"AVEDA KEDARVA!" She shrieked. Voldemort was only able to semi block it, the force of the spell slammed him against the wall, creating a hole of dust and drywall. Lily adjusted her weight on her legs. She had injured the right on after hitting the wall dodging the Cruciatus Curse he had aimed at her.
"CRUCIO!" Voldemort shrieked again. But this time, Lily could not dodge it in time. The spell hit her, causing her to drop her wand and fall to the ground in torturing pain. While she lay on the floor writhing in pain, Voldemort strolled casually over to her and picked up her wand. He snapped it in half and threw it into the growing fire. For one second, Lily wished the fire would come and finish her off. Burning to death was a more welcome fate then the pain she was suffering now. She tried to stay quiet as to not give him the satisfaction but the pain intensified. She screamed.
"That's better." Voldemort whispered, grabbing her face in his hands and twisting it so he could see the agony in her eyes. Lily smelled his rank breath and gazed right into his blood red irises. "You've been abandoned Lily. No one really wanted to fight me. No one was as," his lip curled, "brave as you. Not one wizard wanted to risk his life for an insignificant little boy."
"Dumbledore will come. He'll finish you." Lily managed. She felt satisfaction at the look of fear that quickly flickered over his face before melting back into a furious expression. He slapped her across the face. She barely noticed the sting under the pain that seemed to grow with his anger.
"How DARE you bring HIM into this conversation!" He hissed.
"I'll bring him in the conversation as I please!" Lily gasped. Her nerves felt like they were on fire, causing her body to twitch violently as a result.
"You've been betrayed Lily. By everyone! By Dumbledore, by your supposed 'secret keeper' and your husband."
"James…would…never…betray…me…" She gasped again.
"He isn't here now, is he?" Lily said nothing. Voldemort smirked. "I'll kill your son now Lily Potter. There is nothing you can do about it. Actually…maybe I'll be mericful and kill you first. You must be in so much pain right now…" He lifted his wand to perform the killing curse. But during that second in between, he broke his hold over the Cruciatus Curse. Lily leapt up and dashed to Harry's room, closing the door behind her. Harry was standing up in his crib, silent tears rolling down his cheeks. Lily's heart broke at the sight of him. She ran to him and gathered him up in his arms, her back to the door. Her entire frame shook as the realization dawned on her. She had failed him.
"I'm so sorry Harry." She whispered into his ear. Harry let out a wail of something that sounded like despair. Lily shook, tears rolling down her cheek. Please God, spare Harry!" The door exploded from behind her. He was in the room.
"Give me the boy!" Voldemort hissed.
"No! Not Harry!" Lily shouted her eyes squeezed shut.
"I'm afraid you don't have much choice in the matter," Voldemort sneered. Lily then put Harry down and stood in front of him, her arms out.
"You're going to have to go through me to get to him." She hissed back.
"I don't mind that." Voldemort said, pulling his hood up again.
"Are you so much of a coward that you can't even have your face shown to the person you're about to kill? Are you that ashamed? Or is it because you're being merciful? Is it because you want your victims to die remembering something besides that ugly, mutilated face of yours?" Black fury appeared in Voldemort's face.
"You'll regret that. Expulso!" Lily was thrown back. She raised her head to see her nightmare. Voldemort was standing over her son, wand raised and a prominent sneer on his face.
"Say goodbye to your son! Aveda Kedavra!" Lily closed her eyes.
"I love you Harry. So much." Were her last words whispered as she ran in front of Harry, her body twisting as the green light enveloped her instead of her son, whom she loved more then anything else in the world. Her last thought was that she wished she could have told him that more then 347 times. Blackness overcame her as she plunged into the peacefulness and nothingness of death.
**
James Potter appeared suddenly in front of his house feeling frustrated. The tip had been wrong. Voldemort was no where to be seen among the countless Death Eaters that had made their appearance instead. He looked up towards his house, expecting to see a light in Harry's room. He saw much more then that. Flames engulfed his house.
"LILY!" He screamed, bursting into the door, a sick feeling enveloping him. "Aguamenti" He yelled. Jets of water exploded from his wand, putting out fires all around the house. In five minutes, he had the entire fire out, but he barely noted the damage. If he did, he would have seen the charred and disturbed furniture that lay strewn across the living room, kitchen and hallway. He would have noticed the human shaped hole in the hallway up the stairs and felt the crunch of glass under his shoes. What he did see was the door to Harry's room off its hinges, burned by an unforgivable curse. Grief welled up in James.
"Harry!" He yelled. A whimper resounded from his room. James could have fainted from relief. He quickly entered the doorway. What he saw stopped him in his tracks and brought him to his knees. Lily was lying across the floor in an odd angle. Her eyes were glassy and unblinking. She was dead. Murdered by the killing curse. It was all clear to where Voldemort had come now. They had been betrayed.
"LILY!" James yelled, crawling to his wife's body. Hands shaking, he felt for a pulse. There was none. A sob wrenched from his body and tears poured down his cheeks.
"Lily! Oh my God Lily!" He stroked her cheek with a shaking hand, moving a strand of red hair from her face. Tears poured down in torrents down his face. "Lily wake up, please!" He begged as if he believed words alone would call his wife back from the dead. Harry started to cry. "Harry?" He whispered, reaching over Lily's body to pick up his infant son. "How did you survive?" He ran a hand over Harry's fuzzy black hair only to freeze at what he saw. Across Harry's forehead was a lighting bolt shaped wound.
"Harry? What happened to you?" James sobbed, as if his ten month old son could explain to him everything that had happened after he left the house. Harry stared up at him with his tear streaked face. James held Harry tight to him, his body racking with sobs.
"Harry, Harry, I screwed up. I should have been home to protect you and your Mother. I should have never left the house. I should have stayed…DAMN IT!" James cried out, causing Harry to erupt in tears again. He rocked his son, cursing inwardly. Harry hated when people yelled. "God why did you take Lily? Why didn't you take me instead?" James whispered fiercely.
**
James didn't know how long he stayed like that, rocking Harry back and forth. When his subconscious awoke, he realized he should send an owl. But with the awakening of his subconscious, unbearable pain ripped through him. So he sat numbly, kissing his son's curious shaped wound letting his pain and grief course through him numbly. He had since arranged Lily into a more humane position and he held her ice cold hand, stroking it with his thumb. He whispered to her that he loved her and that he was so sorry for being a horrible husband. For abandoning her when she had needed him most. Suddenly, the voice of one of his best friends, Remus Lupin jolted him back into reality.
"JAMES? LILY? WHERE ARE YOU?" He bellowed. James tried to yell that he was upstairs. But he had lost his voice from lack of use. Harry started to wail again at the sudden break in silence. "HARRY?" Lupin shouted. James heard Lupin thumping upstairs. "JAMES? LILY?" He yelled as he ran down the hallway, turning into Harry's room. A look of shock appeared instantly on his face. If the circumstances weren't so dire, it would have been slightly amusing. He fell to his knees.
"James…what happened?" James finally found his voice.
"Voldemort."
**
Soon, members of the Order had flocked to the Potter house like crows. They took Lily Potter's body, wrapped it up in sheets and brought it downstairs to lie on a couch that they had picked up from its side. James stood outside; holding Harry, wishing the sky wasn't so beautiful. The stars shouldn't even exist anymore. The one who inspired them was gone. Remus stood beside him, rubbing his shoulder, but not saying anything at all. There was nothing to say. Footsteps on the cobblestone driveway caused the three men to look up and see Albus Dumbledore walking towards them, an expression of great sorrow on his face. When he reached them, he spoke,
"James, no words can express how sorry I am." He said softly. The fire that James thought he had finished half an hour ago flared up again.
"This is entirely my fault. I shouldn't have gone! She told me to stay! Instead I had to go and kill the fucking bastard! THE BASTARD KNEW! HE KNEW I WOULD COME! HE KNEW I WOULD JUMP AT THE CHANCE TO DESTORY HIM!" James roared causing Harry to whimper.
"Quiet James. I understand the reason for your anger. But, realize that if you had been there, Voldemort would have killed you too. That would leave Harry with no parents at all. Right now, I'm going to have to ask you to put your grief aside. Harry needs you to be calm." The mention of Harry caused James to sag down and clutch him on closer.
"I'm a lousy father too." He muttered. Remus opened his mouth to protest, but Dumbledore silenced him with a look telling them he could argue with him later.
"Is Harry harmed James?" Dumbledore asked softly.
"Not badly. But he has this funny shaped cut on his head…" Dumbledore's expression turned grave.
"May I see it?" Wordlessly, but reluctantly, James handed Harry to Dumbledore. Dumbledore gently exposed the fringe of his hair, inspecting the wound. His expression turned troubled. James' heart started to pound.
"Is it serious? Can you do something about it? Oh God not Harry too!"
"It will be okay James. The wound isn't serious. But he will have a scar." James took a deep breath, trying to steady himself.
"What caused it?"
"The Aveda Kedarva curse." Dumbledore said. James weakened at the knees. Remus held him up.
"But…he's alive!"
"Something protected him."
"He didn't get the full blast?"
"I'm not sure." Dumbledore said, giving Harry back to James, looking around. The expression on his face reminded James of another question.
"Where's Voldemort?" Dumbledore looked around.
"That, I'm not sure of either." His grave blue eyes switched between Harry's wound to the ruined house. "I think he's gone…for now."
"Gone? As in dead?" Dumbledore's expression was still troubled.
"I'm not sure."
"What killed him?" Dumbledore's eyes moved from the house to Harry again.
"Your son."
"Harry? But he only has two teeth! How can he kill the powerful dark wizard that killed my wife?!" James demanded.
"I don't know James." Dumbledore answered quietly. "But I will study this matter. Right now, it's best that you take Harry somewhere. Anywhere. For the moment, it's safe."
"Come on James." Remus said quietly, pulling his friend away from the house. He looked back.
"Where's Sirius? And Pete?" James mumbled. Lupin suddenly looked uncomfortable. "How could this happen? How did Voldemort break past the charm?"
"James…Sirius told." A cold dead weight settled in James' stomach. He felt a wash of hurt and betrayal course through him. He fought to keep himself calm.
"And Pete?" He asked his voice flat.
"I don't know." Lupin answered softly. After some persistent tugging, Lupin pulled James along.
As Lupin led him away, James kept on glancing back. The memory of his wife's cold face filled his mind, causing his hazel eyes to fill with tears. He looked down at Harry.
"I don't care what saved you, or how you survived," He told his son. "But I'm glad you did. Looks like we're on our own now Harry." His voice trembled on the last sentence. He kissed the top of his son's head, only to realize Harry had fallen asleep. Even though his breaths were still sobs, James smiled, his love for his son filling him. But there was an enormous part of his heart that remained empty. That part of the heart was where Lily had been. And now she was gone. He gritted his teeth. And he knew who to blame.
**
The next few days had been torture for James. He crashed at Remus' place, spending all his time with Harry. He received countless owls, from readers of the Daily Prophet, and his old teachers and acquaintances from Hogwarts, some sympathy; some writing to research's Harry's miraculous defeat of the most powerful dark wizard ever in existence. James shook his head. The Dark Lord Voldemort had struck fear into everyone's hearts for the past 30 years, yet he was defeated by a ten month old who wasn't even out of diapers yet. Usually, James would have found this extremely amusing and ironic. But the price of his defeat was too much to bear. He had sent a letter to Lily's sister. He didn't expect a reply. Turning back to the letters, he inspected a rather memorable one (a letter smeared with blotched ink and parchment) from Hagrid, the game keeper that had given Remus, Peter and- he ground his teeth in hate- Sirius so much fun in Hogwarts. He would always chase them away from the grounds with a crossbow yelling profanities at them when they tried to go near the Forbidden Forest. Placing the unreadable letter aside, James looked down at Harry, who was happily tearing up the letters James had left on the floor. Shaking his head, James managed a smile. The expression felt wrong and foreign on his face. A curse and a slamming door jolted James out of his reverie.
"DAMMIT!" James jumped up, and poked his head around the arch that led to the front doorway.
"Remus? Is everything alright?" Lupin slammed the Daily Prophet on the nearby kitchen table, jabbing his finger at the front page.
"I've found Sirius and Pete," He growled. James craned his neck so he could see the title.
SIRIUS BLACK MURDERS TWELVE MUGGLES AND ONE WIZARD IN MUGGLE SQUARE
"No…" James whispered, going weak at the knees. Lupin nodded.
"It gets worse from there. Guess who was the wizard he killed."
"Oh God…not Pete!" James moaned, his entire body shaking in loss for his friend, Wormtail. He had no more tears to spare. "What happened?"
"Read on." Lupin said grimly.
It has been confirmed. The mass murders that were committed hours after the tragic death of Lily Potter, miraculous survival of the famed Harry Potter and the disappearance of Who- Must- Not- Be- Named were committed by Sirius Black. The daily prophet has also received information that Black was the Potter's secret keeper.
How? One might ask. What caused such a tragedy? It started with a brave wizard named Peter Pettigrew. News reached him of his friend's wife's murder. Along with the knowledge that Black had been the Potters' secret keeper, Pettigrew went after Black. Mad with grief, Pettigrew cornered Black, apparently, his last words being 'Lily Sirius! Your best friend's wife! Your friend! How could you?' Black's reply was pulling out his wand and blowing up everyone on the street. The biggest remains of Pettigrew found was his finger.
James set down the paper, swallowing his disgust and tears. He didn't want to read anymore. Only his finger. He shuddered.
"Remus…Sirius would never… I mean…" his sentence came out half strangled. Lupin put a hand on his shoulder.
"I'm sorry James." He said, his voice cracking. "He played us all along. He had us all fooled."
"I can't believe it…Wormtail…" Lupin nodded, an expression of grief present on his face.
"He was awarded Order of Merlin, first class." A sudden rage flared up in James.
"DAMN IT!" He screamed standing up so fast his chair fell over. He started pacing the kitchen like a wild animal, grabbing at his hair in agitation. "Everything's falling apart! First Lily, then Peter and twelve muggles! I swear when if I EVER see Sirius roaming these streets free, I'll kill him! I swear I'm going to kill him! He's lucky the ministry and dementors got to him first! I thought he was my best friend!" Harry cried from the living room softly, putting an end to James' rage. He quickly walked to the living room and picked Harry up and held him close. Harry's whimpering subsided. Lupin appeared beside him.
"Are you okay James?" James barely nodded.
"I'm so sorry Harry. I promise, I'll do whatever it takes to keep you safe." He whispered to his son. Harry yanked his glasses off, causing James and Lupin to smile.
"You're lucky you have Harry James. He seems to be the only thing that's holding you together." Lupin commented quietly. James nodded.
"I'm extremely lucky Remus."
AN: I know the entire Sirius situation is confusing. It will be cleared up later Well, here you go I hope you enjoyed it. Some feedback would be much appreciated R&R :D.
~amkh