A fic interpretation of a bit of a roleplay I did with Kaikiki. It's rather sad, but I think it screamed to be written as a fic.
Enjoy!
You asked me why I knew so many languages, I remember. We were walking down a near-deserted street in some small village in France, and I told you that I was not only fluent in French, but also in German, Italian, and Portuguese. You asked where I learned them and why, as if I would ever need to be fluent in five languages. You were amazed that I had the time.
It's because my father scheduled away my summers, I told you, not wanting your sympathy but getting it anyway. I had summer language lessons, as well as tutors. I didn't have a summer vacation, not really.
So did you get to do anything you wanted to do, you ask, amazed.
Yes, I reply, I was allotted a half-hour every day to do an activity of my choosing. The obvious question is next, the one question that I don't want to answer.
But you ask anyway. What did you do with your time?
I drop my gaze and shrug. It's embarrassing, I say, and unimportant.
Are you trying to say, you reply, that what you chose to do with your own time, not having to do what someone else tells you, isn't important?
I nod. Yes. It was. It was stupid, too. It only ended up hurting...more things. I hesitate, then add softly, I've never told anyone this before.
You tell me that I don't have to talk about it if I don't want to, but I want to. I want someone to know. I want you to know more about me.
When I was younger, I start, avoiding your gaze, probably from the time I was seven to just before Hogwarts, I would use my thirty minutes to explore around my house. There was a little meadow behind my house, and it was there that I found a family of wild rabbits. After that I would go and play with them for as long as I dared hoping my father would never follow me. I was scared about what he would think of me.
You made a soft, inaudible noise but I pressed on. This went on for a couple of years. It was so neat to see the rabbits that were babies when I found them grow up and have children of their own. I felt like I had been invited into some secret world that only I knew about. I named them all, could tell them apart, everything. They were my pets, since I was never allowed any. Sometimes, when I was feeling particularly daring, I would sneak them food from the house.
You had to know where this was going. You had to. You know what my father is capable of.
One day, my father did, indeed, decide to follow me. He killed every last rabbit, after each one telling me not to cry, that Malfoys didn't cry, didn't care, and didn't love. I tried my very hardest not to cry, but I couldn't help it, I did. After that I was forbidden from going into the meadow and banished to my room for the thirty minutes I had to myself. After that I just read, or sometimes I would draw pictures of my pet rabbits. After I was finished I would burn them, frightened of my father's reaction.
You were silent for a long while. I know you didn't know what to say. Finally, you tell me that it wasn't silly or unimportant and that you think my caring is adorable.
All I can do is try to hold back tears and whisper a soft 'thank you'.