I.
And she got better, and started all over again …
And when the nurse fell asleep that night, she went to the window to talk to the Owl.
She reached out her hand, as if to touch the filthy creature, and it hopped nearer. But
she smiled because she had tricked it so, and with her other hand, brought up the knife
and threw it towards the Owl. It was a bad throw and she missed, only grazing a wing.
She cried into the curtains, and didn't notice when the Owl weakly flew off. It never
came back after that.
The doctors said she wasn't recovering as fast as they had expected. So she couldn't go
to school anymore. The Owl stared through the window, sometimes she went into fits.
Cold hard stare. She wasn't alone, not ever ... so they put a curtain over the window,
and it took away the sun. But when the wind blew, the Owl was still watching. So she
waited. She waited until everyone was gone away, and the nurse went to answer the
phone ... she took one of the shiny knives from the kitchen and slipped it under her
shirt. Rushing up the stairs, she cut herself by accident, but it was only a hairline,
inflicted by a nail during a tumultuous sleep, really.
An Owl - she remembered it from her window. It was there always when she arrived
home from school. But she knew the doctors were right, so she told it to go away. It
never did - no matter how hard she screamed. until her throat was dry and she
collapsed coughing. but it wouldn't leave.
The nurse stayed with her at all times, to make sure she didn't think without supervision.
There was a machine in her bedroom, the nurse could give her shots to make her fall
asleep, if something bad came to mind ... But they couldn't control her dreams, and she
reveled in them ... everybody was there, and they were laughing, until the nurse woke
her up again. They were afraid she would hurt herself … they were afraid she might slip
into a sleep and never wake up again …
So they took away her Book. And they reminded her that there was no Labyrinth. And
there was no king or any goblins. And they reminded her again and again - until she
started to see that she had made a mistake.
But the doctor helped her to forget. It was hormones, yes, they created for her a
character with whom to share her deepest thoughts ... a secret fantasy world for her to
fall into when she was upset ... happens all the time, that's right - mostly girls ... totally
normal, except when the character takes over ... yes, sometimes they forget their friends,
want to spend more time alone, with their imaginations ... but you can fix that. With time.
Just give her time ...
One day her mind started to scream, and it didn't stop. Something ... from the past. It
haunted her, and no matter how hard she tried, these thoughts kept coming back, night
and day ... until she could think of nothing else ...
She was happy after it happened. She had learned a lot. Her parents were pleased. But she
became dependent, and they didn't like that. At first it wasn't bad. But then she couldn't
leave the house without the Book, and then she couldn't eat without the Book at the table,
and then she couldn't go to sleep without the Book under her pillow. She didn't want to go
outside anymore. She didn't want anything except the Book. Her teachers were worried.
She wasn't keeping up with her studies. She might have to repeat the course. Her parents
were concerned. She was losing weight. She slept all the time. She didn't care.
The darkness of night seemed futile; the lights of the city were too bright for the natural shroud.
An anxious girl lay dreaming, alone in her bed. She was always alone, though she didn't mean to
be. She thought no one wanted her; she wouldn't allow anyone near her – that way she would
never get hurt. She cried out in her sleep; her hand twitched; in her mind, she was reaching out
for something …
"Sarah …" a voice from the past; it whispered to her gently. "Open your eyes …"
* * *