I don't own Naruto. If I did, Deidara wouldn't have been captured again in episode 280, and Sasuke wouldn't have been that big of an ass when he came up with how to destroy Danzo.

"No"

"Come on, Danna, wouldn't this be so much more efficient hmmm?"

"No."

"Dannaaaaa, but it is more efficient, and you know it. Come on, we have a profile of him and some of his clothes and stuff hmmm", whined Deidara.

Sasori just grunted in disapproval once again. The pair had just finished extracting a bijuu and were back on the move, heading towards Suna for the Ichibi. They were close enough to the desert that surrounded Suna to feel the hot winds already.

Sasori didn't like Deidara's idea at all. He had already known that something bad was going to happen the moment the blonde brat decided to suggest something to Pein. Pein, having not really cared, had allowed the decision to be made between the two; as long as they caught the Ichibi, it didn't matter to him, which led to his current predicament.

Ever since they had ended the extraction meeting, the brat had been pestering him non-stop about the idea.

"Danna, it'll be easy and you won't have to hang around all that long hmmm, and it's not like I'm slacking on helping out, hmmm", insisted Deidara, ducking to avoid a low hanging tree branch. Persistent brat.

"Deidara, you know I hate waiting. Your plan requires me to wait for you to finish up your part", grumbled Sasori from deep inside Hiroko.

"It won't take that long, don't worry Danna mmmm. And it's not like I could do your part hmmm", persuaded Deidara, sounding like the voice of reason.

Sasori slid to his right to avoid a deep looking trench. "Why don't we stick to the original plan: you get the ichibi, I'll get my spy and put up the traps."

Deidara sighed. "How about this, Danna. If my plan fails, we use yours hmmm?"

"Deidara..." The red head inside of Hiroko sighed; why did the blonde brat have to be so damn annoying? "If I do this, and something goes wrong or you make me wait too long, I'm going to make you into a puppet, even if your style doesn't suit mine", agreed Sasori reluctantly.

"Awesome! Here, everything's inside the scroll." Deidara reached into his akatsuki cloak and pulled out a sealing scroll. "Just keep going towards Suna hmmm. I'll go intercept the jinchuuriki mmm", inform Deidara, before jumping away into the slowly fading canopy of leaves towards Konoha.

Closing his eyes briefly, he brought the scroll inside Hiroko and unfurled it. Taking out another scroll, he opened it with his chakra. When out of the second scroll popped out a vial of blood, Sasori dipped his finger in the vial and smeared it on the seal from the scroll Deidra had given him. The contents sprang out and into Sasori's lap. After Sasori sealed the vial of blood back into the second scroll, he looked down at the contents on his lap.

There were a pile of clothes, another storing scroll, albeit smaller, and some papers with a picture of a red haired boy around sixteen.

Sighing, he picked up the papers and read them quickly, occasionally glancing at the smaller storing scroll and clothes on his lap and at Hiroko's surroundings.

The first few lines on the first sheet of paper said, "Gaara was once kind and had initially tried to be friendly to others, despite their fear and hatred of him, but Yashamaru's actions and words changed him. Realising that nobody loved him, Gaara used his sand..." (1)

'Okay, I don't need to read a report about him angsting. It's a waste of time.'

Skipping ahead to his personality, he continued to read. After getting the basics of how the jinchuuriki acted, he moved onto his personal history. Apparently, the jinchuuriki of Shukaku had a deep bond with the Kyuubi jinchuuriki. The bond made him become less of a homicidal sociopath, and more open to others. The jinchuuriki tries not to rely on the Ichibi ever since that incident with the Konoha jinchuuriki, and now strives to find happiness. He became Kazekage in order to finally be acknowledged. There was more: a section was entitled background and family, but the puppet master decided to read it later. Althought from the papers, he still sounded like a more quiet, and stoic person.

It's no wonder Deidara couldn't play this part; he was practically the opposite of the jinchuuriki.

Looking around and detecting no nearby chakras, Sasori carefully stepped out of his puppet and on to the grass under the shade of a particularly large tree.

'This is so stupid', he thought to himself before stripping of his Akatsuki cloak, and dressing in the other pile of clothes.

Sighing once he was dressed, he turned towards the smaller storing scroll, and opening it, saw a giant gourd and two jars of make-up pop out.

He sighed again (he seemed to be doing a lot of sighing today), he strapped on the gourd, applied on some black make-up around his eyes, wrote the kanji 'love' on the top left of his forehead, and sat down with a piece of wood he ripped off of a tree.

Settling down, he began to carve a pair of green eyes. Once he finished, he took out his own eyes and replaced them with the green ones. After quickly surveying himself on the reflective surface of a kunai, he deemed himself ready and got up.

Taking off the scrolls on the back of his wooden body, he sealed those and Hiroko all into Deidara's sealing scroll, leaving him with just one sealing scroll and some papers in his hand.

Sasori continued to walk towards Suna once he was sure he didn't leave anything and was ready. After a while of walking with the occasional sprinting, Sasori arrived at the edge of the forest. In front of him stretched the large, sandy desert. If he had a human body, he probably would have felt the lashing hot winds and burning sun.

Hiding the papers up in front of him, he began to read the rest of it. Once done, he sealed the papers up into the same large scroll as before, and dumped it all into the large gourd on his back.

'Oh right. I need to control sand.'

Opening his wooden left chest just slightly, a hundred chakra strings shot out and quickly attached themselves to the largest clumps of sand that he could find. When he tried moving the sand, Sasori knew he was screwed.

"Damn it Deidara, one hundred grains of sand is the size of your brain; puny!" growled Sasori angrily to no one. If someone were to attack him, he wouldn't be able to use the jinchuuriki's sand attacks.

'Whatever', Sasori sighed.

Giving up on the matter, he started to walk towards Sunagakure

(1) I got this from Narutopedia.

A/N: Well… I know, I should be working on my other story, but this idea was on my mind for soooo long! I know; excuses. Oh well, meh.