Chapter 1: Take off the dress
The only memory I have of my father is the day he left. He pressed a snow globe into my cold hands, closed my fingers around it, and turned his back.
I could see the first snowflakes fall onto the road ahead of us, settling and ultimately vanishing on the wet asphalt. It was not cold enough for them yet, but their time would come.
Every house we passed looked older than the last one, each of them surrounded by a foggy layer of emptiness and discomfort. I rest my head against the car window and let out a deep breath. The glass started to mist up, revealing my previous attempt at drawing a flower.
"I think we are here" someone said.
The car came to a hold, the engine turned off. Next to me, James leaned back in the driver´s seat and closed his eyes. He put on a brave face, but this was as hard for him as it would have been for anyone. I turned to see if Lilly was still asleep. Just when I was about to gently touch her leg, she
yawned and gave me slight smile.
"Sleep well?" I asked, trying to return the favor.
Lilly nodded sleepily and tried to stretch within the confines of the car.
"Ready?" James finally said and started to open his door.
He sounded like a soldier going to war, but I could not blame him. If nothing else, all three of us were headed for an uncertain future. I had tried to remain optimistic for the past three months, but when I set foot on the grounds of Violet Mansion, I shivered. It was so much colder than when we had left the hotel this morning. But there was no turning back now. This was it. We were standing in front of our new home- a gorgeous old villa overflowing with darkness.
Lilly and I were carrying two big bags, while James was still struggling with the rest of our luggage. In a way we were lucky for not having to bring any furniture or heavier items, since our uncle had assured us he would provide us with everything we needed. Looking at his house, I did not doubt his promise anymore. Uncle Richard had never been very close to us, nor had he been around much in the past. The only real thing I knew about him was how he looked, because of the photos I had seen. Photos that I had found when we had to clean out our house. Photos of childhood memories, sweetness and unbearable pain.
James rang the doorbell. Once. Twice. The sound of it seemed loud enough, and yet no answer came. After a few moments of silence, James began knocking, then banging, and then yelling at the door. Finally, someone opened it.
"Not good with first impressions, are we?" the man said sarcastically as he lead us into the hallway.
That was him, I thought. That was Richard Colton. He was wearing a three-piece suit, even though he was not expecting anyone outside of family, his hands were clean, his black hair neatly cut and trimmed. He looked nothing like my mother. A strange sensation swept through me as I saw her image pass me by. Unsure of what to say next, I held out my hand.
"I am Nathalie."
Richard raised a dark brow and smiled. At least he attempted to.
"I know. Nathalie, James… and Lilly" he said coldly, his eyes on our little sister.
Lilly was fascinated by the statue of a young woman in the hallway. So much so, that she seemed lost in her own little world.
"Let me show you to your rooms, someone will take care of the luggage" Richard explained and went ahead.
James rolled his eyes and took Lilly by the hand. I followed them upstairs, but could not shake the eerie feeling slowly taking over my body.
Violet Mansion was a family heirloom. It had been passed down from father to son ever since it's building. Our mother had sometimes told stories centering on the house, but even as a child I had been able to tell that she had been exaggerating. There could not have been ghosts there, I would always think while listening to her tales. No demons. No shadows lurking in the hallways.
But now I was not so sure anymore.
The Mansion was massive, with several wings and priceless interior design. Richard informed us the gardens and the east wing were open to visitors even in winter and therefore not our place to go. Neither were the servants' quarters or the cellar. Ironically, Violet Mansion had just become much smaller for us, than it looked from the outside.
"Dinner's at six" our uncle concluded his little speech about forbidden rooms and left for his office one floor above us.
I sat down on my bed next to Lilly, while James closed the door.
"I appreciate having my own room, but this is… let's say weird, right?" he seemed just as confused as I was.
"Which part?" Lilly inquired.
"Well, first of all, our uncle seems like he would have preferred a rat infestation to us staying here…" James paused to think of more examples, blowing a black lock out of his face.
Lilly stood up and shrugged, "I think Uncle Richard is nice!"
"You can be weird and nice at the same time" I tried to mediate.
"Or you can just be weird. Really, really weird", James answered, sounding quite railed up.
"Why don't you go and settle in and we go explore the house a little?" I tried to calm him down a bit.
My brother slowly nodded, leaving for his room, where he hopefully would not attempt to escape through the window right away. Lilly had already taken my hand, leading me trough the hallway in the speed of lighting. I loved having a little sister, but when it came to enthusiasm and excitement the ten year age gap was really showing. But I had long ago decided that I would give Lily whatever she needed, since the world had not been kind to her often. Our mother had adopted her just two years ago, her dark skin and curly hair often an open invitation for other people to assume and speculate. Then, mom had died, once again tearing away a parent from Lilly.
"Where are we going, if I may ask?"
Without slowing down, my sister answered, "To the attic!"
"Oh, okay… why?" I probably was missing an important clue.
"Uncle Richard said there are costumes up there for the spring ball! Didn't you listen to him?"
Apparently I had not been, since the notion of a spring ball had also escaped me. The mansion probably hosted several events like it in a year to keep money coming in.
As soon as we climbed the attic ladder, the scent of dust and old things dominated the air. Lilly headed straight for the carefully hung Victorian gowns in the left corner of the room. Her eyes lit up, a fierce determination taking over.
"I know you want to do it" I tried to hold back my amusement.
"Can I?" Lilly asked innocently.
I gave her a confirming nod, and in no time she had flung one of the reproduction dresses over her head. It was a beautifully made ball gown, dyed in a deep green with black lace all over. It might have been too big for her, but it complemented Lilly surprisingly well. Slowly, she wandered over to a mirror, which was in dire need of cleaning and scanned her reflection.
"You should try one" she said, almost commanding me.
Looking at the options I winced. Most of them seemed to be cut for a very slender figure.
"I don't think those come in a 16, sorry Lilly" I put on a sad face and shrugged.
"No, look! This one…" she grabbed another dress.
I took it and held it up in front of me, looking in the mirror. Light blue had always been my color, going well with my fair complexion and ebony hair. The gown seemed weirdly out of place to me, with its lightness; all soft tulle and fake flowers. Staring at the reflection, it felt like I was not looking at myself anymore. My skin seemed coated by a grey tint, glowing without any light source in sight and my eyes… my eyes looked so much darker, almost sunken in. As I slowly put a hand to me cheek, my lips began to form a smile, showing yellow teeth. Suddenly there was this ringing in my ears, the urge to look away and yet I stared on helplessly, as my face turned into a ghoulish mask.
Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress Take off the dress
"Nathalie?" Lilly asked with a faint voice.
I blinked, turning away from the mirror. The dress was gone, someone had thrown it across the room.
"Is something the matter?"
What was I supposed to say? Lie to her? It probably was a better option than telling the truth. I lowered myself to lock eyes with Lilly. Trying my best to sound calm, I smiled slightly.
"Maybe we play tomorrow? It is almost dinner time" I said, hoping that the clock downstairs would agree with me.
"O… Okay."
"Let's just-"
Whatever I was about to say got stuck in my throat, as I caught sight of a shadowy figure behind Lilly. A scream echoed through the attic and a mirror broke. Lilly winced, scared by sharp glass falling to the ground. She silently took of her dress, while I collected the blue gown. As soon as everything was back in order, I felt my hands getting warmer again, the smell of the attic slowly fading away.
Take off the dress, I thought, and followed my sister downstairs.
The dining hall was bathed in golden candle light, a classical music piece playing somewhere in the background. Everything felt much more like an old black and white movie than real life. No one dared to eat, as the two maids, who had brought the dinner, stood by the entrance to the hall.
"Please" was all Richard said.
He motioned towards the full plates and took a sip of his whine. I desperately wanted to break the tension.
"The dresses at the attic… who made them?" I said, my words incredibly loud against the silence.
Richard put his glass down, raising one brow. It seemed to be something he was not aware of doing.
"Most were made by the tailor from the town… some of them are original pieces from the Victorian era."
My heart skipped a beat.
"The green one…" I whispered to myself, but Uncle Richard picked it up.
"Yes, definitely one of the vintage ones" he confirmed.
I forced myself to look up from the wooden table and met his eyes. They were sparkling in the dim lights of the room, changing from grey to blue. My throat tightened. Our mother had had the kindest, most captivating eyes I had ever seen, and while she had not passed that specific feature down to any of us, she shared them with her younger brother. I quickly looked away, not wanting anyone to see the unshed tears in my eyes. I stood up abruptly, leaving the room. All of this- the dress, the mansion, his eyes- it was too much.
"I'm not feeling great" I managed to murmur on my way out.
My room was warm, the bed freshly made. A tear fell down my cheek as soon as my door was closed, contrasting the heat rising inside my body. I was going insane. When mom had died, I had cried. I thought that the feeling of despair had passed. I had made peace with this new life. I had made peace with it before we had even arrived here. But it did not matter. Not to my heart, not to my mind and not to my tears. I could burry her body, but I could not burry her memory. Maybe Richard could teach me how to not let emotions affect my actions anymore. I slowly exhaled, hoping for some kind of relief.
Somebody was knocking on the door. Lilly was probably bringing me a plate of leftovers. I composed myself and opened the door to greet the empty hallway. Looking around, I could not see anyone leaving or hiding. What a sad day it had been, that this was not even surprising to me anymore.
But answering the door had not done the trick. Another knock followed, clearly not from the door I had just closed. It could not have been the window. I wandered around my new room, trying to identify the source of the noise. Maybe it was a pipe in the wall. I moved my empty wardrobe to the side.
Instead of another beige wall, I was standing in front of a narrow door. It would lead into the abyss, if I opened it and a part of me wanted to try. I did not even realize, what I was doing, as my hand reached for the handle. I saw it being pushed down, about to open and then-
Another knock.