Pull Me Through
Summary: A short about what Dom and Letty go through when Dom sleeps at night.
"Dom, you're hurting me." She gasped out, the hands around her neck nearly crushing her windpipe. The night before, they'd made passionate love, and fell asleep a mess of tangled limbs, naked skin upon skin.
The passion he had afforded her then was the complete opposite of the wrath she felt in his hands now.
She knew he was asleep, knew that he was having a nightmare about his time in Lompoc and had no doubt that when he recovered from this, he would be an emotional wreck.
He had been out for years and these days, the nightmares didn't come often, but they still came.
"Baby, please, wake up." She pled, her hands going to his, which were wrapped around her throat in a punishing vice.
At her strangled gasp, his eyes flew open, still not seeing her. She looked at him, scared more for him, than herself and waited for the savage gleam in his eyes to recede.
It was like counting back from 100 as the different shades of emotion flipped through his orbs, until he was finally awake.
Her body felt weak, her air supply exhausted as her face began changing colors.
Her naked body, once pliable and warm, was now stiff and rigid beneath him. His arms, flexed grotesquely against her frame, looked inhumane in stature.
She looked like an abused woman, and he the abuser, her body a mere rag doll as she plead with her eyes for him to wake up.
As his eyes settled on hers, realization hit and his hands released her instantaneously. Her body fell back onto the sheets with mangled coughs and gasps. He scurried off the bed and away from her as far as he could get, breathing deeply in the corner of the room.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Letty." He broke, his chest heaving with heavy breaths as though he'd been choked.
She finally caught her wind, her hands going to her neck as she massaged the bruises forming on her flesh.
She sat up weakly, taking in his horrified face and softened.
She needed to reassure him that this was not his fault. She needed to tell him that she knew he'd never hurt her and that she loved him, flaws and all.
His body language took on that of a scared child as he looked down into the palms of his hands before squeezing them into tight fist, turning and throwing them through the wall.
She didn't flinch at the action; she merely turned and grabbed his beater, throwing it over her head as she stood.
With a large sigh, she walked up behind him, purposefully and gently putting her hands on his back.
"Baby, I'm ok." She affirmed, needing him to stop the thoughts she already knew had formed in his mind.
His head dropped and she knew if he'd turned in that moment, she would find his face full of tears.
"I couldn't take it, Letty. I couldn't take it if something happened to you one of these times." He whimpered, the raw emotion in his voice breaking her heart.
"You'd never hurt me Dom. I trust you."
"Every time I put you through this it kills a part of me. I don't want that world touching you."
He stood with his back to her for a while longer before turning to face her. She went into his arms immediately, wrapping the large objects around her before squeezing him tightly.
"I never feel safer than when you're holding me. I never feel more loved than when your arms are around me." She professed, waiting for him to squeeze her back.
It took him a few minutes to respond and when he did, she finally exhaled.
She led him back to the bed, pulling the covers back and allowing him to lay down first. She reached down, grabbing the hem of the shirt and pulled it over her head, tossing it back to the floor where it belonged.
Instead of lying next to him, she crawled on top of him, allowing his arms to hold her to him like a child. Her legs lay on either side of his large frame as she lay her head on his chest, planting a firm kiss as she burrowed down into him.
"You gonna talk about it?" she asked, waiting for him to begin. He sighed, pulling her tighter into him as his eyes closed in memory.
"It was the about that time the guards beat that kid to death in front of me. In my dream, no matter how many I went through, they just kept beating on him. I remember…" he trailed off, and she raised her head to look into his eyes.
"Go on." She encouraged, placing a chaste kiss to his lips in support.
"I remember the way his skull sounded when it caved. I remember the way his brain matter splattered on my shirt. I remember the smell when the kid messed his pants. I can't ever go back, Let. I'll die first." He swore, and she nodded in understanding.
Before she could lay her head back onto his chest, he turned her head, recoiling at the bruises forming with his hands prints.
"Jesus, I could kill myself for this." He groaned, his fingers tracing lightly over the flaws. "I'm so sorry baby. Please forgive me."
"You know I don't hold nights like this against you Dom. I know you would never put your hands on me. I'm just sorry that you have to go through this." She sighed, allowing him to inspect his damage.
"Any other woman would have left me a long time ago. I'm damaged goods, Letty."
"Any other woman ain't your woman. I love you just the way you are; in all your millions of pieces. I'll always be here to help put you back together again." She promised, looking into his eyes and praising the difference she saw in them.
Before they had been cold, devoid of human response and now they were filled with love and gratitude.
He was grateful for her; the only blessing besides Mia he'd managed to preserve in his chaotic life. With them on the run, he needed her more than he wanted to admit.
"I love you." He professed, staring back at her just as equally.
"I know. I'll always know." He nodded at her, before kissing her softly, his heart exploding that through everything, she loved him unconditionally.
It was times like these, when he was forced to be weak with her, when he was not tough and macho that he knew she was real.
She always held him up, always treated him like a man, and when he was battered and broken, she still had faith in him, seeing not his mistakes, but his intentions.
He knew she would always see a man he did not. He assumed that was part of loving someone.
This unattainable pedestal that she put him on, that he would forever try to aspire to.
She saw through all of his bullshit, all of his talk, and all of his imperfections and saw him.
This was the reason why all the other women could never take her place, why he would never dream of anyone else sharing his bed.
She was everything to him.
As their kissed turned into something more than comfort, he made sure to handle her gently, like precious glass.
Letty could always tell where his head was by the way he made love to her, and she sighed with longing at the thought that tonight, she'd have to allow him to treat her delicately.
As he flipped them so she was beneath him, he peppered soft kisses along her face until he got to her neck, where he took special care to kiss the purple marks tenderly.
When their bodies joined again that night, she let him take complete charge, allowed him the time he needed to make amends with her body.
He took great care in holding her close, whispering his love over and over and pleasuring her almost unbearably.
She was almost weeping when her orgasm forced through her, the raw emotion of his love and promise consuming her.
As they lay in each other's arms, Dom tried his best not to pull himself away from her when he knew sleep would again come.
"I don't measure how much you love me during the good times, Letty. I measure how much you love me when I'm lower than low. With you, it never changes. You only give me all of you."
"You're the same way Dom. You let me have all of your faults and all of your success. My love is a direct reflection of the real you. Never forget that. I'll love you until there's no breath left in me."
"Sleep. I'll watch you." He propositioned, pulling her close.
"I'd much rather you slept and let me hold you. You're safe with me." She countered, settling down wrapping her arms around him. He knew it wouldn't do him any good to argue, so he turned so she could spoon his back.
As he drifted off to sleep he murmured, "You always pull me through."
"You bet your ass I do." She whispered back, kissing the top of his head as his breath evened.
Fin