DISCLAIMER: I do not own Castle or any of the characters contained therein. They are the property of Andrew Marlowe and ABC. I am just borrowing them for a little while. I make no profit from this in any way; it is just for my reader's enjoyment. Swordwriter.
Author's note: This story is totally AU Set in a universe where Johanna is alive and well and Kate is an assistant district attorney. She is still a strong woman but without the terrible trauma of her mother's death. Rick is still an author but much more than that. Alexis is not in this story. I know that I've got three other stories out there unfinished but I started this several months ago and couldn't figure out where I wanted to go with it. I intend for it to be short six to ten chapters or so. I can also abort the story. Let me know.
Angst/comfort/romance/commitment. Swordwriter
A TIME FOR US
PROLOUGE
Kate Beckett met Richard Rogers when she was ten years old and he was twelve. Her parents were friends with the actress Martha Rogers who had recently moved back to New York permanently after years on the road. Martha had purchased a small house across the street from the Beckett's. Martha was having a small homecoming party and had invited the Beckett's.
It wasn't a large party but it was wonderfully warm and joyous for everyone except for the tall twelve-year old with the beautiful blue eyes. Kate and the boy were the only children present. Kate's sister Natalie was only two and spending the evening with their grandparents. He was leaning in a corner, not talking to anyone, a book held casually in his hand. Kate walked over to him and smiled a shy, beautiful smile. He barely looked at her. "Hi, I'm Kate." She said.
"Richard." He said, still not looking at her. Even at ten, Kate could reach people.
"Why are you mad at me Richard?" She asked.
"I'm not mad at you; I just don't talk to people. People don't want me around. I'm a bastard."
Johanna Beckett always kept a close eye on Kate. She was close enough to hear the last statement. "You shouldn't say that word, it's a bad word." Kate said.
"It's not a bad word; Richard said it's just a word. But it means I'm not like other kids I don't know who my father is I've never seen him. He didn't want me. So it means I'm a bad person your parent's won't want you around a bastard."
The tears started in Johanna's eyes. How could people be so cruel to a boy, such a handsome, sensitive boy? She thought.
Kate stepped a little closer and reached out a hand to touch him. "I don't think that you're a bad person, Richard."
Johanna stepped up to the two of them. "I'm Johanna, Kate's mom and I don't think you're a bad person either. I'm a friend of your mom. I don't think she raised a bad person."
From that day on, Kate and Rick were almost inseparable. Kate was at that stage where she was all long skinny arms and legs and was often teased by older boys and viciously teased by older girls. Rick never teased her and was always there to comfort her. He was there all through junior high and her first two years of high school. In those years Kate grew into one of the school's beauties. Rick grew into a tall and powerfully built young man. His love of books and words made him too much of an intellectual to fit in with the Jocks and too strong and handsome to fit in with the nerds. One group that he did fit in very well indeed was the cadets. He took four years of ROTC and was Cadet Major by graduation.
By her sophomore year, Kate was thoroughly in love with Rick. Most people called it puppy love but both Kate and Johanna knew better. Then, disaster struck for Kate. Disaster was a girl named Kyra Blaine. Rich, pretty, sexy and a senior she set her cap for Rick. She used the oldest weapon in the book and Rick, thinking with his lower body fell into her trap. He thought that he was in love with Kyra. To her credit, at first she thought that she was in love with him. It wasn't just her body either. She was Rick's intellectual equal. Rick invited her to the senior prom.
Kate was devastated. How could Rick do this to her? Didn't he know that she loved him?
Rick never intended to hurt Kate. He did love her but at that point he didn't realize how he loved her. After all she was two years younger and he still thought of her more as a sister. After all, they'd never even kissed other than playfully or when he'd comforted her when she was hurt.
It would be a year, after Kyra dumped him before he realized how he felt about Kate and then he felt that it was too late.
A week after the prom, Rick realized that he hadn't seen Kate all that week. He walked across the street and knocked at the door. A furious Jim Beckett opened the door.
"How dare you come over here after what you did to Kate? Get off my property, Kate doesn't want to see you, now or ever!"
Surprised at the anger, Rick said, "I don't know what you're talking about. I'd never hurt Kate. I'd never lay a hand on her."
"Physically isn't the only way to hurt someone, YOU STUPID, SELFISH BASTARD!"
Shocked at the insult Rick stepped back, but not knowing what he'd done wrong Rick's own temper flared. "As far as I know, I never did anything to Kate. As for being a bastard that wasn't my fault but since you want to throw it at me as an insult, you can stick your opinion up your ass and GO TO HELL!
Inside the house, Kate was shattered. As mad at Rick as she was and as hurt, she still loved him but she loved her father too. I f they got into a fight her father could be injured or Rick. Most likely her father, he was normally a quiet gentle man. As young as he was, Rick was a big man, quick and strong.
"Mom, do something!" Kate begged. Johanna ran to the door and grabbed Jim's arm.
"Jim, please calm down don't do something stupid." As soon as Rick saw Johanna, he spun on his heel and strode across the street. Johanna pushed Jim back in the house. She made him sit down and fixed him a cup of Irish coffee.
"Sit there and calm down and calm your daughter down. You know in your heart that Rick wouldn't intentionally hurt Kate. I don't think he realized how much she loves him. What you just said to him was hateful. You know how sensitive he is about that word you used. Jim flared.
"You heard what he said to me!"
"Yes I heard, Johanna said. He never should have said it but you had it coming. You're the adult."
Kate crept into the room, sobbing. "Mom, please talk to Rick, Yes I'm mad and I'm hurt but I don't want Rick to hate me, even if he loves Kyra. I love him." Kate was wise beyond her years.
Johanna smiled at her daughter. "Let's give Rick a chance to cool down then we'll both go talk to him." They waited for half an hour then Johanna picked up a plate of sugar cookies that she'd baked that morning. She would use them as a peace offering. She knew how much Rick liked them. They walked out the front door, seconds too late.
They watched as Rick, dressed in jeans and boots, a black t-shirt and an old leather bomber jacket roared out of his driveway on his black Indian motorcycle, hitting fifty miles an hour before he reached the stop sign at the corner, which he ran. There was the blare of a horn and the screech of brakes as a pick-up truck missed his rear wheel by inches.
Rick avoided her at school for the final three weeks of the term and whenever she saw him at the local teen hang outs Kyra Blaine was firmly attached to his arm.
One week after the school year ended the Beckett's left for their annual, month long vacation When they returned, the Rogers' house was closed up with a for sale sign on the lawn.
Kate spent that entire summer mourning the loss of her friend. Meanwhile, Martha and Rick had moved to an apartment near the theatre district. Rick had started his freshman year at Columbia University. He'd applied for and received grants and scholarships associated with the senior ROTC program in which he excelled.
Kate started her junior year and began her rebellious wild child phase losing her virginity just after her 17th birthday to a boy she didn't even like that much, due to too much tequila at a party.
She did, however keep her grades up and went on to Stanford University, receiving her degree in three years.
Rick
Rick sold his first novel in his sophomore year and dedicated it to Kyra. A month after it was published she dumped him. It was that same year that Martha's mother died and left her a considerable fortune and the ownership of a house in the Hamptons.
After Kyra dumped him, Rick withdrew for a time and concentrated on his studies, especially ROTC. Martha's new wealth allowed her to give Rick enough money to enjoy a much better life style including better clothes and a new Corvette. Surprisingly it didn't cause him to neglect his studies. On the social side, his bitterness at Kyra's betrayal led to a cavalier attitude towards young women. He'd take them on one or two dates bed them and drop them. He was breaking hearts right and left.
It was one shy, pretty freshman whose heart he broke that had the courage to tear into him, not only causing him to realize how badly he'd been behaving but what he'd done to Kate. He straightened up after that. Just as he'd done in high school he graduated at the top of his class in ROTC and was offered a Regular Army commission which he accepted.
Rick enjoyed the army. He liked the structure and discipline. Especially the camaraderie, the brotherhood of fighting men. He gave it everything he had, opting for Infantry, Rangers and finally Special Forces. On his tenth combat mission he was badly wounded, spending six weeks in the hospital before being sent on recuperative leave. Following his leave, he was assigned to West Point as an assistant tactics instructor. He began writing again and soon published the first of what was to be his wildly popular Hawk series about the fictional Captain Robert Hawkins and his Green Beret A team. He'd written it under the pen name Richard Castle.
It was shortly after Hawk's Nest hit the best seller list that he met a beautiful red-haired actress named Meredith Lee. They had a passionate affair and he married her after she became pregnant
Meredith had no interest in being a mother. Her only real interests were her career and money.
Rick came home one evening and caught her in bed with her director. They had a nasty fight and divorce followed immediately. Since she had no chance of getting a lot of money from Rick, she aborted the fetus. Rick requested to return to Special Forces.
Kate
Kate returned to New York and received her law degree, was admitted to the bar and joined her parent's law firm. The savage murder of her cousin, an investigative reporter, caused Kate to join the district attorney's office as an assistant district attorney working closely with three detectives from NYPD, Tom Demming, Javier Esposito and Kevin Ryan. It had taken more than a year to solve the murder but it was finally traced to a hit man hired by a New York City councilman involved in drugs and prostitution. The resulting trial put the hit man on death row and the councilman in prison for life without parole.
Even through all through all the years and her experiences, she never forgot Richard Rogers or, deep down stopped loving him. The closest she came to getting over Richard was when she met FBI agent Will Sorenson. She believed that she loved him. They moved in together and intended to get married. Six months after she moved in with him, Will got an offer for a promotion at the FBI office in Boston. He asked Kate to move with him, not considering that her career and family were all in New York. She wanted stability and realized that Will could easily move from office to office throughout his career. She begged him to stay with her in New York.
She got home one night, to find all his things were gone, not even leaving a note. She was devastated that he'd put his job above her. A month after he left Kate found out that she was pregnant. She called Sorenson and told him. He flew into a rage and accused her of cheating on him. She hung up on him and swore that he'd never have any contact again with her or her child. Kate's morals wouldn't allow her to abort the fetus. She now has a beautiful two year old daughter. Her next affair was with Detective Tom Demming.
That was a short one, as Tom was a womanizer and Kate realized that she was just another conquest.
Her latest was Cardiac surgeon Josh Davidson. Davidson was a tall, dark haired, handsome man whose home base was Mt. Sinai hospital in New York City. Unfortunately for their relationship, he spent more time outside the country than he did with her and was often absent when she needed him most. She finally ended it with him. And that brings us to the start of our story.
Chapter One: Homecoming
It was a warm spring Saturday afternoon in New York City. Johanna Beckett was enjoying a nice lunch with her daughter Kate before heading out to buy a dress for an evening at the theater. Jim was taking her to dinner and to see the stage version of Steel Magnolias with Martha Rogers in the role of Clairee Belcher and attend a party after the play. It was a charity event for the theater league.
Johanna had not seen her friend since the debacle with their respective children and hoped to reconnect after the play. Kate was clearly sad. "What's wrong with me Mom, why can't I find aman who truly loves me? A man who'll put me first?Kate's beautiful hazel eyes were wet with unshed tears.
Johanna's eyes clouded with worry for her daughter. "What brought this on Katie?"
"I broke up with Josh two weeks ago, I just couldn't tell you right away. I finally realized that he was always put his work ahead of me and whenever I really needed him he wasn't around. I also realized that while I liked him a lot I really didn't love him and I couldn't see the future I want with him. I want the whole thing, the white picket fence, the kids, the lazy Saturday afternoons relaxing with my husband.
Kate paused and shook her head. "You know who I picture with me when I dream of that, Mom?
Rick! It has been ten years and I still love him. I never stopped. Do you remember Danny Benson, the kid who had a crush on me in my senior year? He was two years younger than me, just like I was with Rick. When I started going out with Walt Crandall it broke his heart. But he had the courage to tell me, which I never did with Rick. It made me realize that Rick never meant to hurt me. He didn't know how I felt. Oh Mom, I wish I had the chance to see him again to see if he could fall in love with me, if he could give me that future."
Was it coincidence or fate? The two women were so caught up in their conversation that they didn't notice the tall army officer enter the restaurant accompanied by a flamboyantly dressed older woman. They sat in a booth directly behind them, separated by a screen.
The waiter approached the couple. "What can I get you Captain? It's nice to see a veteran in here."
"I'd like a double bacon cheeseburger, onion rings and a beer. San Miguel, if you've got it."
"I'm a veteran myself, Captain. 1st. MAG. I was a just a green grunt. Just back from the sandbox Sir?
"Yeah marine, about a month. I'm First Group."
"Yes Sir, I saw the beret. Glad you made it back, welcome home Sir."
"Thanks Marine. Same goes for you."
Johanna knew that voice. It was familiar but she couldn't place quite place it.
"And for you Ma'am? The waiter asked.
"I'll have the chef's salad and a glass of white wine please." The woman replied.
That voice she definitely recognized. Martha Rogers. That brought the other voice into context.
Richard Rogers! Richard, a Captain in the army? She could see by the shocked expression on Kate's face that she recognized both voices as well.
Martha started speaking. "Richard, don't be ridiculous you've given your country six years, your tour of duty is over in two months, you've got four best- selling books and the movie based on Hawk's Nest will be out in a week. You're wealthy, come home and settle down."
"Mother, I'm a soldier. I believe that I'm a good one, a leader. I'm defending my country, protecting my people, saving lives. That I'm able to tell a good story is a nice bonus and I'll admit the money is good but my writing is nothing profound. It's just adventure fiction. The one really good thing about the Hawk books is that they've created an upsurge in interest in enlisting. The army appreciates that so they've cut me a little slack for appearances and such. But the bottom line is that I'm a team commander, my men need me."
"Do they need you so much that you sacrifice your own life Richard? On your first deployment you were nearly killed! Six weeks in the hospital and nearly a year to fully recover. You were wounded on your second tour and less than a month ago you were wounded again on your third tour and you want to go back? My God isn't three chances to get yourself killed enough?"
"I guess not Mother, it hasn't worked yet. Everybody dies Mother. At least when I buy the farm I'll buy it for the right reasons and I won't have to worry about lying in a bed with Alzheimer's or dementia or a rich old man dying alone. Aside from you, mother there is no one in the world loves me. The fan girls love Richard Castle not Richard Rogers."
Rick shrugged. Let it go Mother, being a soldier is not just what I do. It's who I am. I'm on the five percent list for promotion to major. If I go for another four, it's a sure thing."
Martha was almost ready to cry, something very unusual for her. "I wouldn't even mind the Army so much but why Special Forces? You had a nice secure place at West Point. You could have a normal life, find a good woman and raise a family."
Both women could hear the pain and bitterness in Rick's voice. "Raise a family, Mother? Are you blind? When it comes to that, look at my track record. Kyra dumped me because I wasn't good enough for her family. I'm a bastard don't you know. Meredith got pregnant, which is why I married her. Then she cheats on me in our bed. After the divorce she aborts her own baby. Then there was Gina. She lasted three months. Haven't you heard Mother? Three strikes you're out. When I think back on it, I was probably mostly to blame. I thought that I loved Kyra but as I reflect I think I was fascinated by her and was too young to know the difference. I know now that I didn't really love Meredith or Gina. I loved someone else long before any of them came along and she made really loving anyone else impossible."
Johanna and Kate were both stunned at his next words.
"I loved Kate Beckett. The worst mistake I ever made in my life was from being young, stupid and blind. Kate was the most extraordinary, Girl I ever knew. She was beautiful inside and out. She loved me, loved me like no one ever did, before or since. Gave me love from the first day we met. She may have only sixteen when I screwed up yet she understood love; real love more than Kyra, Meredith and Gina combined. Damn fool that I am I didn't recognize it at the time and I hurt that lovely girl terribly.
If I had only understood, stayed by her we could have had the most amazing life together. Mother I love her, I always will but it's too late for me. I know she must have found a great guy by now, a guy who loves her as she deserves to be loved, who cherishes her as I should have so long ago and still would if I could. Staying in action as much as possible keeps me from dwelling on what I lost, what I could have had and that's something I can't forgive myself for."
End of discussion, Mother. I'm on leave for the next month. Then I'm going back to Fort Lewis. I'll meet you at Giovani's at eighteen hundred."
Kate's face was in her hands as she sobbed quietly for a few moments, appalled at Rick's statement that it hadn't worked yet. She wasn't about to let that attitude remain. Knowing that he still loved her she wasn't about to lose him again. He was NOT going to get killed in action if she had anything to say about it.
When she raised her face the look of despair that had been there earlier was gone, replaced by a fierce determination. Quietly she said, "Mom he loves me, he still loves me. Knowing that, I don't care what I have to do. The Army can't have him anymore. He's mine. I am going to achieve my dream mom, Rick may not know it yet but he's my one and done. I'm going to have my husband, Lisa's going to have a daddy and she's going to have siblings!"
Johanna signaled the waiter for a refill of her coffee. She couldn't believe that this was a chance encounter it had to be fate. Martha may not have any miracles in her purse but there just might be a miracle in the form of a long legged beautiful young attorney, sitting right across from her. She sipped her second coffee and helped Kate formulated her plan.
Kate peeked around the screen as she heard Rick and Martha stand up. Her heart fluttered as she saw him again for the first time in ten years. He was tall and erect, even broader in the shoulder than he had been in high school, his face leaner and deeply tanned. She sucked in her breath at the sight of a thin white scar that went from his cheekbone, along his jaw and into his neck. She knew that it was a knife scar and that it came entirely too close to his carotid artery.
Her mouth set in a thin line. That is the last damn scar you're going to get, my love.
Kate touched her mother's arm. "You said that you're going to the theater tonight to see Martha's play is there is an after party isn't there?" Johanna smiled. Kate's first step was obvious. "Yes there is Katie, it's a charity event and yes I have a ticket for you. I was just going to invite you when Rick walked in."
Kate got a very determined look on her face. "Waiting for the party isn't good enough Mom; some other woman might snag him before I get the chance. Let's get moving Mom, I need a new dress too, one that will knock Rick off his feet. Then we need to hit the salon. I'll call Marisol and see if she can fit us in."
It was obvious to anyone seeing them together that Johanna and Kate were mother and daughter. Johanna had kept herself in shape over the years. She had the same slim yet shapely figure she had when she married, long legged and tall. Her hair was dark brunette her eyes were brown.
Kate was built exactly like her mother. Her eyes were hazel and her hair a lighter chestnut color. Both women were nothing less than beautiful. Neither Johanna nor Kate were much into shopping, knowing their own tastes and going straight for the styles they liked.
Kate picked a form fitting deep burgundy ankle-length dress with a slit on the side that displayed her long legs. It had a deep v neckline and showed off her slender figure to perfection. Kate was something of a shoe freak so she knew that she'd have a pair of killer heels that matched the dress.
Johanna chose a very similar dress in a gunmetal gray with a metallic sheen.
Leaving the salon after having their hair and nails done Johanna said, "Go on to your apartment and get ready, meet us at the house at 5:30."
Kate smiled at her mother, the smile a little nervous but a happy one nonetheless. "Okay Mom, see you soon."
When Johanna got home she called to her husband. "Jim please come here I need to talk with you."
Jim came into the room. "What is it Honey, you look gorgeous by the way."
Johanna smiled and thanked him then her face took on a very serious mien. "Jim I need you to really listen to me because I'm very serious about this. Kate told me this morning that she still loves Richard Rogers and would give anything to see him again to reconnect with him. You know very well that she doesn't hold what happened against him she told you so."
"When we were eating lunch today, we saw Martha and Richard and overheard their conversation. They didn't see us. Richard is here on leave. He's a captain in the army. He's going to be at the play tonight. Before that he's going to Giovani's with Martha. So are we, you, me and Kate. Get us reservations."
Jim protested. I wanted to go to The John Bull. Johanna rolled her eyes.
"We can go there tomorrow. Tonight you're going to put your daughter's happiness ahead of your stomach and your pride. Kate's going all out tonight to reconnect with Rick. But I know him. He's a proud man. He has to be. He's a Green Beret. You are going to apologize to him.
Jim glared at his wife. "Why should I apologize to him? He did hurt Katie and besides you heard how he answered me, no respect for his elders."
Johanna scowled, "At that point Jim, you didn't deserve any. You were an adult who couldn't control his temper. What did you expect an eighteen year old boy to do? I can't believe that the man I married would hold a grudge for ten years. From what I heard today, that young man has been through hell. I heard him tell Martha that he loves Kate and has for years but has given up because he's certain that she's married by now. Jim, he's at the end of his service commitment but is planning to reenlist, going back to combat. Jim, he's been deployed three times, wounded three times.
If he goes back it would be his fourth tour. You were in the army, what are his odds of surviving?"
Jim looked thoughtful. "Not high Jo, not high at all. Not in Special Forces."
Johanna said, "Look at me Jim. Give our daughter her chance. Maybe she can change his mind. Knowing how she feels, what do you think it would do to her if she found out he was killed in action and we could have prevented it?"
Jim sighed. "I guess you're right Johanna, I never met Demming, I didn't like Davidson, he was selfish and arrogant. I liked Sorenson until he walked out on Kate. That was deliberate, the selfish bastard. If you and Kate are right, at least Rogers never meant to hurt Kate. I'll go along with you and see what happens."
Kate opened the door to her apartment and a tiny whirlwind enveloped her. A smiling cherubic face looked up at her. "Pick me up Mommy." The child said. At a little over two years old Lisa Dawn Beckett was already showing signs of being a miniature copy of her mother. It seemed like Mother Nature had used the same mold on all the Beckett females. Lisa's big hazel eyes had more green in them than Kate's but her curly locks were the same chestnut color. She was a pretty child who would probably grow into the same kind of beauty that her mother and grandmother were. Lisa was also precocious far in advance of other two year olds.
Kate picked her up, hugged and kissed her. "Did you have a good day Sweetie?"
The little girl smiled and said, "Yes Mommy I had fun."
Kate turned to her baby sitter and paid her. "Thanks Sarah."
"You're welcome Kate. Lisa's so easy to care for it's a pleasure."
Kate sat Lisa on the couch and said, "Mommy has to go with Nana and Papa tonight do you want to stay with Aunty Nat? If you're a good girl you can have ice cream after dinner."
Lisa clapped her hands. "Oh yes mommy, Aunty Nat is fun."
Chapter Two: Reunion
As they walked into Giovani's Jim Beckett was in awe of the two women in his life. Almost every male in the room turned his head to admire the pair of beautiful women. Giovani himself came to greet them. "Ah Signor Beckett it is good to see you. Signora, Signorina, Venus herself would be jealous of the two of you!"
Johanna laughed. "Giovani, you flatterer, we love the compliments but you know that I'm thoroughly in love with my husband and your wife would put you in the next meat sauce if you flirt with Kate."
Giovani put a hand over his heart. "Oh you wound me, but alas too true, too true." At that all three laughed at the banter. They'd been coming here for years and Giovani never changed.
Jim put a hand on Giovani's arm. "Giovani, do you know the actress Martha Rodgers?" Giovani smiled widely and said; "Si Signor Beckett I know her very well, she comes here often. She came in not five minutes ago with her son. He is a captain. I was in the army long ago. I know the medals. Captain Rodgers is a hero."
Jim sighed in relief. Giovani, will you do me a very big favor? Give us a table for six and then tell Signora Rodgers that you made a mistake and must move them. Then bring to our table. Katie must see him tonight, it is very important."
Giovani smiled. "Ah, I understand. Amore it is a beautiful thing. I will do it."
"Okay it's all set. Let's get to our table."
Kate was suddenly nervous. "Mom, this is so important, I've lost ten years, and I can't lose anymore.
Johanna tried to calm her. "Kate, you don't need to stress out about this. I have good reason to believe that it will work out. I don't mean that it will be easy, it won't you both have a lot of ground to cover a lot of pain to soothe but you can do it Katie, he can do it."
Kate's eyes were wide as she looked at her mother. "It's been ten years Mom; it will hurt like hell if he rejects me. I'm not a glass figurine, I will survive and go on but oh God it will hurt." Suddenly her case of nerves disappeared as the determination returned. "No it won't hurt because I won't let him reject me. I want him and I'm going to get him!"
Giovani approached Rick and Martha's table. He had decided that he would move them but not lie about it. "Pardon me Signora Rodgers, Captain but will you please come with me? Another party has asked that you join them. They are old friends I would like to please them."
Martha smiled delightedly at Giovani. "Of course we accept Giovani. You have taken such good care of me over the years it will be a pleasure." Rick wasn't quite so ready to be accommodating. Trust didn't come so easily after years of suspicion and danger. He loved his mother deeply but didn't trust even her completely. "But Mother we don't know who this is."
"Oh hush Darling. If Giovani says that they are old friends, that's good enough for me."
Reluctantly, he stood and helped his mother from the booth, his whole posture radiating uneasiness. They followed Giovani to the table. A middle aged couple had their backs to them and a young woman across from them held a menu in front of her face. Giovani spoke;
"Signor Beckett your guests are here." Both Martha and Rick froze at his words. All three Beckett's rose and Kate placed the menu on the table. "Hello Martha, Hello Rick. It's so good to see you after all these years." Jim echoed the greeting. Kate's attention was solely on Rick.
"Rick." She all but breathed his name, her eyes dark with so many emotions. Sadness, pain, longing, desire but most of all, love. Rick stood, motionless. Deeply shocked yet too disciplined to let it show. Kate was mesmerized by the sight of the man she hadn't seen in ten years but never stopped loving no matter who had been in her life or how hard she tried.
Rick wore the blue service uniform the left breast ablaze with decorations and badges. He seldom wore civilian clothes. He was a serving officer and saw no reason to appear otherwise and he felt comfortable in uniform. Kate didn't recognize most the ribbons or badges. She did recognize the parachutist wings and the purple heart ribbon and hated the sight of both of them.
She didn't hate the ribbon, the wings or even what they stood for. She just hated what they meant on someone she loved. Rick snapped out of his daze. His voice was cold when he spoke.
"Good Evening Mr. Beckett, Mrs. Beckett but it warmed and softened when his eyes met Kates. Hello Kate." A hesitant smile touched his lips as he said her name. Kate had planned to go easy tonight just say enough to get him to spend the evening with her and open things tomorrow but the dam of pent up emotions burst. She stepped forward and grabbed his hand.
"Come with me, now!" Was all she said. Too surprised to react quickly all he could do was go along. The restaurant had a small garden in the back with a few tables in it that was used for special occasions. It was not in use right now. Kate led him there, never letting go of his hand.
She turned to face him, tears in her eyes. "Ten years! Ten years and never a call a letter, an e-mail nothing at all. I had no idea where you were or what you were doing or even if you were alive. Ten years and all you have to say to me is hello Kate? It hurts like hell to be ignored."
Rick was shocked at Kate's words. "Kate I wasn't ignoring you, after what your dad said I thought you hated me and I know I hurt you…Kate placed one finger in front of Rick's mouth. Her eyes still teary but soft. "Hush Rick. I was just venting. I have to be honest with you. Mom and I were right behind you in the restaurant. We heard everything you said. Every single word. You don't know how much my heart wants to believe it. Did you really mean all of it? I have to know."
While she was talking she had grasped Rick's other hand and was squeezing both of them hard enough to hurt. Looking down into those beautiful hazel eyes Rick could hardly credit what he saw there, something he thought he'd never see in any woman's eyes.
"Yes Kate, I meant every word I said. It took me way too long to realize it but it's true but I don't know what to do about it you can't possibly feel the same way after all I've done."
She put all the feeling she could into her words. "Can't I Rick, how do you know that? Yes I was hurt and very angry with you and I did some wild and stupid things because of it but once I got over my anger I realized one thing. I've never stopped loving you. I've loved you since I was ten years old. I loved you then, I love you now. Yes I've had relationships. I even thought I loved another man enough to marry him. When he left me, I was devastated that he chose his job over me but it should have been worse. But deep down I never loved him completely. Six weeks after he left I found out I was pregnant. He didn't want anything to do with his child. I now have a beautiful daughter, just a little over two years old."
She paused to take a deep breath then continued. "Rick I do love you. I want a life with you if you want me and my daughter. If you do, I know that we have a lot of issues, a lot to work out but we can if you want to. I'm not a foolish girl. I'm an attorney, an ADA so I know what I want and I'm strong enough to do it. Any man strong enough to become a Green Beret can do it too.
Rick was silent long enough for Kate to feel her fears rising again. What if she'd said too much too soon? This man wasn't the boy she'd known in high school. There were scars physical and mental, walls he'd built to protect his sensitive heart from the realities of the life of a professional soldier, a special operator and the damage three selfish women had inflicted. He might love her as he said he does but would he trust her, or any other woman for that matter?
Finally he spoke. "Kate what I told my mother is true, all of it. I want you and a life with you. But I don't know if I can give you what you need. I'm pretty messed up. I'm an adrenaline junky. I break things, blow things up and kill people. That's my job. I'm not a pretty sight with my shirt off. I've got more scars than Frankenstein."
Kate touched his lips. "Hush Babe, All I want to know is if you want to do it. If you want to have a life with me, with Lisa as much as I want our life with you, we'll do it. Because I will tell you what I need and together we'll satisfy both our needs. Do you really think your scars would bother me when I know how you got them? Her smile turned quite salacious As for your adrenaline addiction, I can give you all the rushes you can handle!"
He locked eyes with her. "Are you sure you want this Kate? You're beautiful, extraordinary; successful you can have so much better than a scarred messed up soldier.
"I've never been surer of anything in my life. In a few minutes we're going back inside and I'm going to feed my man the first of our many dinners together. Then you're going to take me to the play and the party. But before we do anything else I'm going to kiss you." Her arms went around his neck and she eagerly sought his mouth, hers opening to him, hot and sweet and ever so demanding. She finally pulled away, panting. She laughed, softly then said;
"We'd better go inside or I just might get carried away and jump your bones right here."
Johanna watched as the couple approached the table. For the first time since Sorenson left she could see hope and the possibility of happiness shining in her daughter's eyes. Kate looked at her mom who was exchanging smiles with Martha.
"You haven't ordered yet?" Kate asked. Johanna shook her head and gave her husband a pointed look. "No we haven't we've just been drinking wine and pointing out to your father that he has no choice but accept the inevitable."
Kate raised an eyebrow. "Inevitable Mom?" Johanna laughed.
"Of course inevitable. The restaurant today, what are the odds? It had to be fate. Hence; inevitable."
Martha spoke up. "I agree with Johanna. The odds against something like this happening by chance are so high that no gambler in the world would give you odds. She looked directly at Rick. For once in your life listen to your mother, my son. Give up your cynicism and accept the inevitable."
Kate sat down and pulled Rick down beside her. Kates eyes were sparkling and Johanna could hear the joy in her voice as Kate said; " Mom, Dad Rick and I are going to start dating and see if we can build a future. We start tonight. Rick's taking me to the play and the after party."
Johanna and Martha both beamed and expressed their happiness with the situation. Jim said; "Rick may I speak with you in private for a minute?" The two men stood and walked to the bar. Jim looked Rick in the eye and said; "I have an apology to make. I should have found a way to make it long ago. I was wrong to say what I did to you. I never should have said it. I blamed you for something I thought was intentional. I should have known that you would never hurt Katie deliberately. You never had in the six years we'd known you. Please forgive me."
Rick put out his hand. "It's forgiven Mr. Beckett. I wasn't in the right either. I acted rashly and I should have come back and talked to Kate." Jim smiled. Then I guess we're good. And I think you're old enough to call me Jim. Will you have a drink with me to seal the deal?"
They each ordered a shot of whiskey and tossed it down. When the two men returned to the table, talking amicably the tension eased out of all three women.
When they finally ordered they had to rush their dinner a little as Martha had to get to the theater in time to dress. The two couples walked into the theater and found their seats. Martha had pulled a few strings and arranged for seats together in the loge seats. The play wasn't the kind that Rick liked but he sat through it proud of his mother's top notch portrayal of her character.
Kate hadn't let go of his hand since they left the restaurant, not willing to relinquish even the smallest connection with him. She held on to his hand all through the play sometimes rubbing the back of his hand with her thumb or caressing his palm with her fingertips. For the first time in a long time she felt that happiness was within reach. She just had to convince Rick that they could achieve it but only if they were together. She knew that time was short. She only had a month to convince him that marriage was the right path for them and to also convince him that he'd done enough, risked enough that he could pass the torch on and leave the army.
Chapter Three: The Party
The party was a whirl of color and sound. A mixture of music and laughter and people chatting. Introductions, handshakes the hugs and air kisses of theater people. Martha was in her element although not the star of the show she'd had greater impact in her role than the star had. There were a number of influential people in the room who were supporters of the theater. Kate was holding very tightly to Rick's arm. She could easily feel the tension in him. All his training and experience of the past few years made him uncomfortable in crowds.
It didn't help that many of the people especially the women both single and otherwise wanted to meet the tall, handsome officer. Several of the younger ones glared at Kate when she wouldn't stand aside. Kate didn't care if it seemed much too soon after so long apart but she was staking her claim here, tonight. She had failed to stake her claim ten years ago. Even if most people thought sixteen was too young to know a lasting love she knew they were wrong.*
After mingling for a little while Kate said; Rick let's go find my parents I want to talk with my mom for a few minutes." Rick agreed and they walked over to where the Becketts were.
"Rick, can you talk to my dad for a few minutes I want to talk to Mom." Rick walked off to talk with Jim Beckett.
Kate took Johanna aside. "Mom, can you watch Lisa tomorrow? I want to spend the day with Rick. There are so many things we have to talk about, so many things we've missed. We only have a month before he returns to active duty. I have to move faster than I really would like but I can't take the chance to lose him again. And I'm going to ask him out, tomorrow night, on a real date."
Johanna raised an eyebrow and quirked a smile at her daughter. "You're going to ask him out?"
Kate laughed. "Yes I am. Haven't you heard that it's the age of equality?"
Johanna shook her head, grinned and said, "L'audace, l'audace, tojours l'audace!" They talked about details for a few minutes then Kate walked back to Rick and found him in conversation with her dad.
"Hey Dad, she said, I want Rick back you can talk football some other time."
"We weren't talking football Katie we were talking about the army." She rolled her eyes.
"That's worse than football Dad. Rick please come with me I want to ask you a question. Do you have any plans for tomorrow?"
Rick grinned and said; "Actually I do I plan to watch football and drink beer." Her face fell. He put a finger under her chin. "Hey Kate I was just teasing you. I used to do it all the time."
She lifted her face, a spark of anger in her eyes. "Well it wasn't funny. Tomorrow is Sunday I want you to spend all day with me. We have a lot to talk about. I'll make a picnic lunch and we'll go out to Battery Park. Then tomorrow night I want a date. A full date and since I'm asking it's my treat, dinner and dancing. Please say yes."
Rick looked into her beautiful hazel eyes and then to her hesitant smile and said, "Kate, I haven't had an offer like that in years. Yes, I'll spend the day with you and I would love to take you on a date. But we'll have to spend part of the day shopping. The only civilian clothes I brought with me are casual, Jeans, boots and tees."
Kate's eyes lit up at that. "Rick I'd love to go, especially if I can pick out what I'd like you to wear. Suddenly Kate released him and said "I'll pick you up at 9 O'clock, where are you staying?"
"I've got a loft at 425 Broome Street. Rick replied. It's on the sixth floor."
Kate smirked. "Pretty fancy digs for an army officer, especially when you only use them occasionally. Rick shrugged. "What can I say? My mother owns the building. I get a reduced rate."
The group split apart and they all rejoined the party, Martha again gathering a circle of admirers.
The Beckett's being prominent lawyers were well known and were acquainted with quite a few of the theater crowd. Kate and Rick just wandered around sipping on their drinks talking quietly and occasionally chatting with other attendees. Kate wondered when one of the younger people commented: I swear I've seen that soldier somewhere before. Her friend replied: You're right. Have you seen the trailers for that new movie Hawk? He's a dead ringer to Hawk. Right down to the scar!
Kate looked at Rick strangely when she saw him stiffen. He'd heard the comment too.
Damn it! Rick thought. Why did they have to do that! I don't want to be recognized!
In the book series Rick had described the fictional Captain Hawkins as having black hair and green eyes but other than that had sub-consciously used himself as a model for the character. The casting director had used Rick's picture on the book jacket as a basis for choosing the actor portraying Hawk. (The scar was covered by makeup in the photograph.)
Kate was no fool. As soon as she saw him stiffen she knew that something was wrong. She pulled him aside and gently placed a hand on his face. "What's wrong Rick? I know that something is."
Rick sighed. "Kate, I was going to tell you tomorrow, there hasn't been time yet. Besides my career in the army, I've written four books, military fiction. They've sold very well. They've made a movie out of the first book. It will be released next Friday. They want me to appear at the premier. So far I've refused. My pen name is Richard Castle."
Kate smiled. "I know about the books and the movie. I heard Martha remember? So you're a celebrity, a wealthy one. Why does that bother you?"
Rick surprised her with his answer. "Because it's not really me, Richard Castle the author is a celebrity. Richard Rogers is not. When they did the jacket shot, I was in uniform, but wearing mirror sun glasses and it only showed down to my shoulders. My name tag was not visible."
"As I said, the army is happy with the publicity aspect and has sometimes put me on temporary duty with the public relations department to do book signings and launch parties. I even have a "Castle" name plate."
Kate put her head on one side and said, "Why don't you want to go to the premier?"
"Besides the points I already mentioned, I'd blow the image." Rick said.
"What do you mean? Kate queried.
Rick sighed. "Whenever I do one of the publicity stunts Paula, my agent sets me up with some starlet or model to enhance the Richard Castle image. You know, famous author, dashing soldier, ladies' man. I am sick of having some brainless bimbo on my arm. I'd like someone to talk to between the photographs. I refuse to be on television with one of them and I won't go solo."
Kate licked her lips and said, "I've never been to a movie premier, Rick. Take me. You'll maintain the image and it will be a once in a lifetime experience for me."
Rick was stunned. "But Kate, back in high school you always were so private, you hated the spotlight."
"I still do but I want to do this for you. Not only will it be fun but it will keep your agent off your back." And it will help me stake my claim and I won't have to watch some bimbo with my man. My man, is he man? Damn right he is. And before this weekend is over I'm going to make sure that he is. I'm not blowing this chance. Rick smiled down at her, that full, rich smile that made her heart flutter. Nobody else had a smile like that. A smile that she hadn't seen in ten years, a loss she had mourned. As she looked up she saw the last of the ice melt out of those beautiful blue eyes, the warmth she remembered slowly returning. Kate couldn't help but feel a little giddy at his response.
"Okay Kate you're my date for the premier but on one condition. You let me buy you a gown suitable for the red carpet. Before you get your back up, let me remind you just how expensive one off evening gowns are. I know you like to pay your own way but I want to do something special for you. After four very successful books and the payment for the movie rights and being the military advisor on the movie I have more money than I can reasonably spend."
Kate thought about it, biting her lip but she finally smiled and said; "Okay I accept your condition but I am still paying for our date and you have to let me buy your clothes for tomorrow. That's my condition."
Rick smiled at her and said; "Okay we have a deal. You'll need to take half a day on Monday so we can go to Liz Ravenscroft's studio so she can start her design and fit you."
Kate's eyes widened in surprise. "Liz Ravenscroft? She's one of the top designers in New York we'll never get in there!"
Rick smiled again, his blue eyes dancing in merriment. "Yes we will. Liz is one of the youngest designers in New York. I've known her since college. She owes me a few favors. We'll get in."
Kate and Rick moved back into the main part of the party. Rick snagged a couple of flutes of champagne of a tray and handed one to Kate. She smiled shyly as she touched her glass to his.
"To us Rick and to our future." Rick was a little nonplussed at her certainty but returned the smile. "To us." He replied.
Kate couldn't help but feel the warmth flash through her whole body at those two words. He was accepting that there was something between them and she wasn't about to let it be a little something. Not on her life. It was going to be a great big something. A life- long something.
To hell with something it was going to be THE thing a life defining love.
Johanna and Martha were both watching the young couple as they walked around the party, Kate's eyes on his face and smiles playing over both their faces except when any pretty woman without an escort came anywhere near Rick, then Kate fixed her with a withering "stay away he's mine" glare. Rick didn't seem to notice those incidents.
Johanna chuckled, her eyes dancing with mirth. "Kate's reminding me of how she was as a child. She never willingly shared her toys with anybody and it doesn't look like she wants to share Rick either. As I said earlier this was inevitable and when they make it official she's not going to be willing to share him with the army either." Martha sighed and looked at Rick and Kate.
"I really hope that she can convince him to leave the army. He's been wounded three times and you know the old saw, three strikes and you're out. The army has plenty of officers, I only have one child. But try as I might he won't leave the army."
Johanna put a comforting hand on Martha's shoulder. "I know but I think we both heard why today. I know my daughter, especially her strength and determination. I know how deeply she loves. All you have to do is see her with her daughter Lisa. I never knew though until today how much she loves and needs Rick. I know that she will make him see that and see that she needs him far more than the army does."
The two young women and a male friend intercepted Kate and Rick. One woman said;
"Excuse me sir but aren't you Hawk?" Rick huffed in annoyance.
"Young lady, Captain Hawkins is a fictional character and as you can see my name tag reads Rodgers. I am a captain in the army but I'm not Hawk."
"But you look just like him." the young woman persisted.
"I was the military advisor on the movie maybe they modeled the character on me, a little."
As the disappointed trio walked away, Kate punched Rick on the shoulder and grinned.
"Rick you are such a liar but I'm glad you are, at least in this context. I don't want to share."
Rick raised his eyebrows. "What? I wasn't lying I'm not Hawk."
Kate grinned again. "I know that you're not Hawk, he's your alter-ego. Rick will you please take me home? I've had about as much party as I can take and I'd like a little alone time with you."
They bid their goodnights to Kate's parents and Martha and caught a cab to Kate's apartment. She asks him to come up and he does. Opening the door to her apartment she ushers Rick in and calls out, softly, "Nat I'm home." Natalie Beckett walks into the room, looking at something on her smart phone. She senses a third person in the room and looks up from her phone, her eyes widening in surprise.
Natalie is cut from the same mold as her mother and sister, tall, slender and beautiful. Her eyes are a dark gray and her hair a mahogany color. "What's going on Kate? You're home early and you never bring a guy here. Who the hell are you soldier boy?"
Kate snapped at her sister. "Natalie Beckett watch your manners and your mouth. I'll bring anyone I want into my home. Besides this is Rick Rodgers."
Natalie stood rooted in place. "Ricky? My God it's been ten years. Then her eyes narrowed. Do you know how much you hurt Kate? She stepped forward but Kate got between them.
"He knows Nat and I don't care. We're working it out. Now go on home." Natalie glared at Rick as she stalked out. Kate slipped her wrap off and said; "I'm going to check on Lisa and then I'll make some coffee. Why don't you take your coat off and relax." I don't want all those medals poking me in the teats when we make out.
*Author's note: The author's sister met her future husband when she was thirteen years old and he was fifteen. They were married when she graduated high school and were happily married for fifty-six years until he died.
Reviews please. Continue or not?
Flashback.
The hydraulics whined as the rear ramp of the C-130 lowered and the frigid blast of the air at 40,000 feet filled the aircraft. At minus 70 degrees the insulated suits and oxygen masks were an absolute necessity. The green light over the hatch turned on and the 12 man Special Forces A team jumped into the night. They were executing a High Altitude Low opening (HALO) jump.
They would open their parachutes at 1500 feet some thirty miles down range. Neither Captain Ron Delanie nor his executive officer Lieutenant Richard Rogers liked this mission at all.
This was their tenth mission on this deployment, (Lieutenant Rogers' first combat deployment.) The information came from a CIA source, which they trusted not at all but orders were orders.
Their first nine missions had been successful and the Afghans called them the Demons. This mission was meant to infiltrate the perimeter of a bomb factory and ammo supply located near the Pakistani border. They were told that it was lightly defended by untrained tribesmen.
It was a trap. The CIA source was a double agent. The A-team landed two miles from their target and buried their parachutes and high altitude gear. They ghosted through the night until they were within a quarter of a mile from their target. They hunkered down and studied it with night glasses. The complex looked exactly like the photos they had of it. But something felt wrong. There was a tension in the air that shouldn't be there. They couldn't see or hear any reason for the feeling so they began their advance.
Only the scout's sense of smell saved them from a complete disaster. A light breeze carried the scent of tobacco and stale unwashed bodies. He turned and called out a warning then automatic fire broke out. The captain was hit and killed instantly and two other men wounded. Rick bounded forward and picked up the heavy M-60E4 that one of the wounded men dropped, slinging his own SCAR-17 combat assault rifle across his back. He dropped to the prone position and began targeting enemy muzzle flashes with the machine gun. At the same time he assumed command of the team. One of the wounded men, only lightly wounded, picked up the other and ran to the rear. Meanwhile four men, carrying modified Javelin missile systems set up and fired the missiles. The team sergeant retrieved the captain's body. The remainder of the team engaged the enemy. One of the two missiles scored a direct hit on the ammo supply which created a tremendous explosion, setting off not only small arms ammunitions but grenades, mortar rounds and explosive charges. The second only partially damaged the bomb factory but blast effects from the ammo dump destroyed more than half of the building. Rick surged to his feet, walking backwards as he continued to fire the M-60. "Fall back and rally, he commanded. The radio operator called for the extraction. Two Blackhawk helicopters and an AH-64 attack helicopter were sitting on the ground about two miles out waiting for the call.
Rick felt a burning pain in his side as he was hit by an enemy round. He staggered but kept firing and moving. A rocket propelled grenade exploded a short distance away and everything went black.