A Day To Remember.
Knowing it was never the best idea for him to drag his lover into this whole tragic world, he's been surviving – or trying to survive at least, Kaito stared blankly at the blank wall before him, as he wiggled in his waiting chair, hoping that somebody would come along, and pinch him, so he would discover that it was all a dream- a nightmare- that nothing happened, that his lover is still here, beside him, safe and sound.
Kaito hated how a wrong choice, can cause a life, and how a life isn't just easily taken. Sometimes, he wondered if his lover was aware of the whole path he was taking, other time, he wishes that they had been normal. It was pathetic how you can love somebody quite much, and how a human was able to make deadly promises with himself but still manage to break them apart, it was a normal thing for us, right? To make mistakes while living, it's just some of them are like a match, once it's lit, it will never get back to its normal site again.
He ran a hand through his messy hair, as he took a look of the place around him. He sighed when he studied the miserable condition Mouri-san was holding, it was good enough for him to hold his tears back, because, he knows-hopes, wishes that it's not over yet, that he's somewhere there, fighting and just wishing for somebody to be waiting for him across the final line, once he finishes his race.
Kaito shook his head, at his stubborn lover, as he hooked his arm around his shoulders.
"I don't agree with the whole idea, you're holding." He'd argued, as he studied the expression the detective was trying to hide, it was one of the most hateful expressions, he had prayed all his life not to see, he had wished that he would be enough to hold it. "I think you should really see a doctor." Katio has pointed for what felt like the millionth times, and it was pointless really. Knowing how stubborn his lover can be, was unbearable, but he still hoped he would listen.
"Kaito, I'm fine, I assure you., it's just…" He continued, searching for the best word to describe his condition. "Some side-effects." He added as an after-thought " Which is pretty normal."
"Side-effects?" The other raised his eyebrow in disbelief, as he let this weird excuse travel out of his mind. "Shinichi, I don't know if you're aware of it, but you have actually collapsed nearly four times this week, and we're still on Monday!" He hissed.
Folding his arms, before him, the detective huffed, he did appreciate Kaito's concern and everything, but sometimes, it does get too much. In his defense, he isn't a kid anymore (Which was officially true, now) and he was able to at least take care of his health (Since, his lover has always accused him of having that amazing ability to throw himself in trouble or attract criminals –after all he did managed into attracting the great Kaitou Kid to be his partner, so he guess that it's kinda true, however he would never admit it.) "Haibara has made her check up, and as long as, she didn't find anything with that matter, I find it pretty normal."
"And is your little consultant aware of the five incident?" Katio shoot him a glare, that proves that he still thinks it's a hell of silly excuse and he isn't convinced yet, and at that point, the detective was aware that once he was edged on, there was no chance to drop the whole subject anytime soon, therefore, he rolled his eyes, and decided to ignore him, making his way toward his desk –he still had a lot of cases to look through, which means more lives depending on him, and wasting them because of Kaito is the last thing he wanted.
Kaito stood there, rolling his eyes, at the detective's rude ways, he could have easily let his ego this time, and discuss in a more civilized way, however, knowing how big the kid-ego was, he didn't. he just rolled his eyes, cursing intentionally, as he watched his detective making his way to his desk.
Maybe, it was his fault this time, Kaito shut his eyes harshly as the memories that were sweeping around his mind, messing with his brain, he was given the chance to prevent it, he was given the chance to hold him back, but he failed, he was given the chance to save him, but he ruined it, he broke the tiny promise he made secretly with himself, to never let the detective slip through his hand –and this time, there was no going back.
'You've messed up.' His mind kept on chanting, as his eyes burnt, trying to hold himself, he didn't want to cry, he promised himself he would never, he was strong when he lost his father, when he nearly lost his best-friend, he has always been strong, and always thought he would never drop his poker face, that he would never let his emotions slip away –but he was wrong.
He felt his eyes burn as the warm liquid rolled down his cheeks, he bit his as he stared at his empty hands –it looks like it wasn't a nightmare after all.
Honestly, when Kaito thought of the whole issue with himself, a part of him was insisting that it isn't a big deal –Well, it's normally for people to get sick anyways, right? And for his lover, his body's immune system with ruined, because of the whole shrinking story, so it's not much of a deal, right ?
Well, he tried to believe himself, and left the issue at itself; However, the detective was getting a little better, when Ai-chan or whatever her name was, gave him some medicine, saying it would limit his side effects, and he started taking it regularly, because Kaito was the one who officially reminded him of it even if he was in the middle of conforming some criminal.
But one night, he was awaken at a sudden burst of cold emptiness next to himself.
"Shinichi?" Eyes half lidded, he called after his lover. "Are you here?" Reaching to pat the space next to him, he noticed how empty it was.
Kaito yawned, as he slipped out of the bed, shoving himself tiredly to where the light was coming, as he pushed the bedroom-door open, causing it to crack, he took the few steps toward the bathroom, as he entered it.
Being welcomed by a site, he probably will never forget, he kneeled closer next to his detective who has his head hooked before the toilet bowl with his hands clutched around its body, as he emptied his stomach.
Kaito ran his hands up and down his detective's back, inviting himself to have a seat on the cold floor next to him, he started rubbing his back, as he tried with all his effort to think more cheerful about this situation. Since well, he knew Shinichi was sick, because of whatever side effects he would always mentioning, but well, sick people do throw up, right? It's pretty normal, he tried for the second time to convince himself.
Once, the detective finished emptying his stomach, he started taking deep breaths, while Kaito found it as the best opportunity to flip him around, so he would be facing him, he did it.
And, well, it looks like the lady luck wasn't on his side for the first time of his life, as the sight he was met with this time, was probably worse than the one he'd encountered earlier.
He noticed how pale his detective was, how weak he was, but that wasn't the point. Shinichi had always been pale or awfully thin, especially when he regained his body again, he became quite smaller than he actually is. He found that there was blood staining his detective's shirt.
Not wanting his mind to be filled with whatever bad idea it is, he checked his lover's body, pulling his shirt up, he noticed that he doesn't have any physical injuries, just as Kaito was about to return his gaze back to his body. The detective coughed, and that's when the magician knew he'd messed up.
It's normal for sick people to cough, sometimes, it's a wet one, others is usually followed by another throwing up session, but what wasn't normally for sick people was a bloody one.. –he knew it was for…dying people.
" Kaito ? " The detective whispered, with his eyes closed, as he rested his head in his lover's embrace. "It hurts." He let his hand to flow down, holding the bottom of his stomach, as he whined a little, biting on his bottom lip.
It was said that once a human is facing a difficult situation or an emergency, the body would provide him with adrenalin to fulfill his needs, and that's what probably happened to the magician.
He didn't feel himself, until he was at the entrance of the hospital with the detective's body limb in his arms, as a nurse headed to where he was standing and announced that a patient was in a dying situation.
Kaito tried to wipe his tears away, as he looked up at the little scientist , who was sitting on the same chair, across him. He was told –and noticed, that this girl might have her eyes on his detective, he knew that a lot of girls do, especially, the other elementary student, he was hanging with as Conan, but once he managed into connecting all the right points and found out that she actually was encountered to the same circumstances his lover did, little did he know, how serious her feelings for him were, and to be honest, it was a serious one.
Once, Shinichi was sent to the ER room, Kaito heard some footsteps to his right then. "Kuroba-kun, is everything alright ?" was whispered through the thin lines of the night-air.
He titled his head to the right, to be met with a overly worried professor Agasa still in his sleeping attire, standing beside him the young scientist, that he grew to hate by now, even if he noticed the dark shades of worry making their way across her face.
"No, everything isn't alright, nothing is." He replied, probably too sad to notice his voice cracking, but his visitors did. "H-How did you know I'm here?"
"We heard you yelling while going outside of Shinichi's house." The professor explained –so, that's what happened, he wouldn't be surprised if he managed to wake the whole neighbor up there, not that he cared, "Shinichi, is he fine? Where is he ?"
Kaito looked at him back, and opened his mouth, but no words came out, he didn't want to say it, he didn't want to believe it, these words had a sour taste on his tongue. However, when his eyes flickered to the professor's side, and remembered that the little scientist is still there, he found a rage of anger floating through his spines, as he stood up, before her, then began, trying to stay as calmly as he can. "You!" He pointed an accusing finger at her, his poker face's been torn up into pieces by now, "You knew that something like that would happen, you knew that he was sick." He inhaled, closing his eyes for a moment then opened them again, "Why haven't you ever mentioned it? Why didn't you do anything to prevent it –or at least, to warn me?"
Shiho –or known as Haibara raised her head up, as she was met by angry indigo eyes, that were glowing nothing but hatred toward her –she had seen this look before. God, she has succeeded into mastering it. It was the same look she took from Ran when she knew the whole story about her making the medicine, the same feelings she sensed when she first met Yukiko when she was worried about the whole black organization story, it was the look that she feared, the one she had promised herself to do anything to slap it away.
Finding her tongue, she started. "It's one of the side effects." She began, explaining, as she avoids Kaito's murderous gaze. "When, Kudo-san was first turned to his younger body, some of his organs were fragile that they couldn't handle the changing, however it wasn't obvious, until we came up with the new antidote, that's when it really got serious, but.." by now, tears were floating down her face, as she continued. "but, I thought that I had everything under control, there was a medicine –I made, that was supposed to limit the liquefaction of his organs, or even stop them, so we would only lose one or two replaceable ones, which shouldn't have been much of an issue."
Kaito sat back to his chair, as he gave his mind sometimes, for this new information to kick in, and it didn't bring anything back, but more hatred toward the young brat. So, his lover's body was liquefied, the thing that happens to our organs when we're sent to graves, or the thing that happens to a cancer patient on his last days, and these ideas never rang a good door in his mind, indeed, it broke all the tiny pieces of hope who was still clutching on.
"It's turned out, that Kudo-kun's body is weaker than I actually thought it is." She added on an afterthought, as she met the magician's gaze this time, with wet teary eyes, however, Kaito completely ignored her, he didn't want to hear anything more, it was useless to hear it, since it will never bring his detective back.
Soooooooooo, that was my attempt to write something angsty, since yesterday I watched Sunflower of Inferno, and somehow I got this idea, haha I know pretty weird _ But yeaaaaaah, soo did I make you cry ? D: If I did, I'm sorry! Tell me your opinion! ~See You 3