Letting The Cables Sleep...
By: Ruth Richter-Woytsek
"Whatever you say it's alright, whatever you do it's all good, whatever you say it's alright...silence is not the way, we need to talk about it..if Heaven is on the way..."--Bush, "Letting The Cables Sleep"
They stared at each other in silence. Her slowly sipping her soda; him barely touching his soup. Their minds elsewhere. She was looking into his eyes again, sometimes gathering a deep breath as if to finally say what was on her mind, but then exhaling and closing her eyes knowing that she wasn't quite ready. She had said too much before; had let him see into that tiny part of herself that she keeps hidden so others won't see her as vulnerable, but he knew better. For all her strength and composure, she was really just as scared as he was....
She shook her head and turned toward the window. How could she have been such a dunce?! After all she had told him, about loving someone else, about growing up--she didn't really mean it, did she? In the heat of what she had thought was battle (and was only Xavier toying with everyone's heads yet again), she had thought he was dying, and she had told him that she would never leave him again. She had let her guard down, had looked into those soft blue eyes, and had felt herself melt. He still had a way of making her weak-kneed and tongue-tied like a little school girl, after all these years. But look at him smiling to himself! Was he so sure of himself?! Did he really think that she was as helpless as a kitten....
He sighed, studying the clock on the wall. The restaurant wasn't quiet--far from it--but he found his heart pounding in rhythm to the constant "tick-tock" emoting from its inner workings. He cleared his throat, "So, shall we talk?"
Her eyes didn't leave her drink. "Talk?" Then suddenly remembering why she had forced herself to come there with him in the first place, she came to life, shaking the insecurities from herself that had just been there. Her long, chestnut locks danced back and forth along her shoulder blades. "Yes, I guess there is lots to say now...." her voice trailed off.
"Shall I go first?" She nodded, pursing her lips like something bitter had just passed through them. "You haven't told me the truth."
There it was, as plain and as simple as that. "No, probably not, but then I haven't told myself the entire truth either." Damn, why was her throat so dry? Why was it so hard to talk?? "I thought that I was over you, that you were a jerk for ever leaving me for another, and I was mad at myself for being a "plain Jane." I'm sorry that I don't have the assets that all the other X-Women are blessed with."
"Katya--"
"Don't you 'Katya' me, Piotr!" she snapped. "At last, I think that I have finally found happiness, and then you show up at my door! I didn't know what to say when you yelled at me, when you pointed fingers at me, when you tried to make me feel horrible for what you did to Pete--"
"I never did that!" he protested.
She studied her hands. Was she imagining all the wrinkles forming there? Was she really so stressed out? She was starting to age, just like her mother, the worrier! "I...I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sound so cruel. That's just how I perceived it." She took a deep breath and slowly let it escape from her lungs, feeling every inch leave her body like they were in some desperate plan to get out of her before they became corrupt. "When I talked to you while you were 'incapacitated'--"
He groaned. "You mean, held against my will."
"Whatever. As I was saying, I began to feel...the love...for you that I used to when we were together. Then I was ashamed of myself. I couldn't look at Pete the same way again." She lowered her head even more. "You don't know what you do to me." She could feel her heart pounding through her chest, growing stronger and stronger as her face flushed.
He smiled. Maybe the gentler side was buried under all the hurt that was there. And then he frowned, remembering how he had treated her so long ago. "Katya, it is so good to talk to you like this again." He took her hands in his, and her face grew redder. "I am truly sorry about old times. I...I lied to you, also."
She looked up, the blush fading. "What do you mean?"
"I never fell out of love with you. I was just...afraid." Now he was blushing!
"Afraid?" Her interest was piqued.
"Um, da...you see...uh...the day after I told you, you know...Logan, Kurt, and I went to the city. To a bar--"
"Oh, how cute!"
"Kitty!" She winced. The only time he called her Kitty was when he was upset with her. "We went to a bar, and I got into a fight with the Juggernaut--"
"Even better!" She clapped.
"Will you," he hissed, and then calmed down and laughed at himself. "I suppose it IS a bit funny, but Logan made me angry." He took one hand and tilted her face up, so to face him. "He knew what I was feeling."
"And that was?"
"I...I am a man, after all, and I had needs--"
"What?!"
He blushed again. "I wasn't looking at you as a little girl anymore." Then she blushed. "I wanted to do...more...adult things."
She smiled; she knew it made her glow and appear a little appealing. "Like...."
"Well, do you know how hard it is to daydream? When Godspodin Xavier is always at the back of your thoughts?" She giggled, and he admired how it made her eyes crinkle. "He shamed me for even thinking about you in such a way. I felt terrible for feeling about you the way that I did. I wanted to go out on dates, to have fun, to dance with you, to look into your eyes, and then...to...." He stopped.
She looked into his eyes. "To make love?"
"Da, that. But everyone reminded me that you were young, and that I should just continue to be the good friend and teammate, and that we could kiss, but nothing else."
She put a finger to his lips and stopped him. She felt him quiver beneath her touch, and she suddenly cursed everyone for ever stopping them from being themselves, for being human! She closed her eyes, and the heat inside her started in her head and then rushed to her toes and back up to just under her stomach. The urge to kiss him then could not be denied.
They kissed, and he found himself growing anxious to be out of there and alone with Kitty. The kiss was soon over, and she began to hum along with the song playing on the radio.
"'I want you to remember, a love so full it could send us all ways. I want you to surrender, all my feelings rose today....'"
She stopped humming and smiled. He gave her a boyish wink, and she barely could bring herself to say, "Check please!"
*********************
She drove while he placed little sweet kisses along her neck. All the attention was making her head spin, and she whispered, "Piotr, please! Wait!"
He straightened himself up in his seat. "Now do you understand why I did what I did? I thought it was for the best. I thought I would save you the embarrassment of Xavier and our friends confronting us about...us."
She nodded. "But I would have faced them and told them to get a life! It would save me years of torture," she whined, but she knew better. They would have told her what color the sky is in the "real" world, and then asked her to bring her silly head out of the clouds. And she, of course, would have yelled, sighed, and then obliged like a good girl.
"I was wrong, Katya. We should have confronted them, and let matters fall where they may. If anything, I could have taken you home to Russia." He slumped in his seat and glared at the floorboard. "Illyana told me to do so. But I was more loyal to being a good "team player" instead of being good to you." His voice strained, and when she glanced at him, he was wiping away tears.
They drove, for the most part, in silence, except for Piotr's choked sobs every now and then. She concentrated on finding a secluded spot for them to stop, and for Piotr to calm down.
She found a nice little off-the-road park surrounded by woods, where they were miles from Salem Center, yet miles from home. She pulled over, brought the car to a halt, and turned the key back to auxiliary. She looked up at him and offered him a grin. "Maybe music will cheer you up?"
Sniffling, he grinned back. "Da, for certain."
She giggled and brought a hand to her forehead, shaking her head in a mocking tone. "The phrase, I told you once, is 'fer sure.'" He reddened, and she moved closer to him, close enough to smell the musky scent that all men secrete. She inhaled it, reveled in his sexy odor, ran her fingers through his jet-black hair, and kissed him gently on his forehead. Her legs weakened when he kissed her back. The secret spot between her legs grew hot and moist, and she squirmed in delight. How long had she waited for the moment they were alone, like this?
The radio played softly in the background. "'You in the dark, you in the pain, you on the run, living your ghost, living your Hell, living your end, never seem to get in the place that I belong; don't wanna lose the time, lose the time to come. Whatever you say, it's alright, whatever you do, it's all good, whatever you say, it's alright. Silence is not the way; we need to talk about it, if Heaven is on the way....You in the sea on a decline breaking the waves, watching the lights go down, letting the cables sleep....'
He looked into her eyes and whispered, "There is no more time for words now." With that he opened his door, walked around the car to her door, opened it, and held out his hand. She didn't hesitate, instead, she grabbed it, almost leaping from her seat in excitement. They wandered down a little dirt path, and not once did she question him, which he was happy about, meaning she trusted him. They came upon a clearing that hadn't been disturbed in a long while. No houses or roads were held snug by the green stretch of hills. Only wildflowers and trees as far as the eye could see....
He could not remember a time that she smelled so fresh or looked so beautiful. It was as if he had wandered upon a live wood nymph there in the valley, and suddenly, he grimaced, wishing that he had his paints and canvas to capture the moment. She shot him a curious look, and then proceeded onward by herself. He followed her (not that watching her walk from that view was so terrible!) to a little pond where wood ducks were bathing and feeding. They didn't even seemed bothered by their presence.
"Wow," she mouthed, gripping his hand.
He stood close to her, and inhaled the aroma of rose and lilac shampoo that she always used on her hair. His fingers itched to run themselves through that glorious soft silk, but she bent next to the water and stared at her reflection. She sighed. "Compared to all this natural beauty, I'm an ugly pimple." She picked up a rock and tossed it at her doppelganger, disturbing the wildlife. Tears fell down her cheeks.
"Oh Katya," he whispered, taking her small hands into his big hands, "let me take away those feelings from you." He kissed her fingers. "You really are a work of art." He pushed her gently to the ground and knelt beside her. He helped her out of her clothes, and she did the same for him though she was too embarrassed to look. Then his hands traveled up and down her flesh, raising goosebumps as they moved. He explored places that no one else had ever been or bothered to go. It felt so good--so right--and she wanted to touch him, but all she could bring herself to do was moan.
And as he watched her moisten her lips with recaptured lust, he felt that everything had just come full circle, and he swooned, knowing that childhood dreams (hers and his) would finally be fulfilled. He marvelled at her naked body, as pink and as soft as rose petals and whispered in her ear, "Are you certain that this is what you want?"
She made herself overcome her girlish shyness and look at his body. How could a man as handsome as him be hers? But she smiled to herself, knowing this was no longer just an enticing daydream that would be intruded upon at any minute. "More than anything," she cooed, and as an afterthought, whispered, "I love you, Piotr."
"I love you also, my Katrina," he whispered back. And he took her gently, as the lights were going down, letting the cables sleep....
By: Ruth Richter-Woytsek
"Whatever you say it's alright, whatever you do it's all good, whatever you say it's alright...silence is not the way, we need to talk about it..if Heaven is on the way..."--Bush, "Letting The Cables Sleep"
They stared at each other in silence. Her slowly sipping her soda; him barely touching his soup. Their minds elsewhere. She was looking into his eyes again, sometimes gathering a deep breath as if to finally say what was on her mind, but then exhaling and closing her eyes knowing that she wasn't quite ready. She had said too much before; had let him see into that tiny part of herself that she keeps hidden so others won't see her as vulnerable, but he knew better. For all her strength and composure, she was really just as scared as he was....
She shook her head and turned toward the window. How could she have been such a dunce?! After all she had told him, about loving someone else, about growing up--she didn't really mean it, did she? In the heat of what she had thought was battle (and was only Xavier toying with everyone's heads yet again), she had thought he was dying, and she had told him that she would never leave him again. She had let her guard down, had looked into those soft blue eyes, and had felt herself melt. He still had a way of making her weak-kneed and tongue-tied like a little school girl, after all these years. But look at him smiling to himself! Was he so sure of himself?! Did he really think that she was as helpless as a kitten....
He sighed, studying the clock on the wall. The restaurant wasn't quiet--far from it--but he found his heart pounding in rhythm to the constant "tick-tock" emoting from its inner workings. He cleared his throat, "So, shall we talk?"
Her eyes didn't leave her drink. "Talk?" Then suddenly remembering why she had forced herself to come there with him in the first place, she came to life, shaking the insecurities from herself that had just been there. Her long, chestnut locks danced back and forth along her shoulder blades. "Yes, I guess there is lots to say now...." her voice trailed off.
"Shall I go first?" She nodded, pursing her lips like something bitter had just passed through them. "You haven't told me the truth."
There it was, as plain and as simple as that. "No, probably not, but then I haven't told myself the entire truth either." Damn, why was her throat so dry? Why was it so hard to talk?? "I thought that I was over you, that you were a jerk for ever leaving me for another, and I was mad at myself for being a "plain Jane." I'm sorry that I don't have the assets that all the other X-Women are blessed with."
"Katya--"
"Don't you 'Katya' me, Piotr!" she snapped. "At last, I think that I have finally found happiness, and then you show up at my door! I didn't know what to say when you yelled at me, when you pointed fingers at me, when you tried to make me feel horrible for what you did to Pete--"
"I never did that!" he protested.
She studied her hands. Was she imagining all the wrinkles forming there? Was she really so stressed out? She was starting to age, just like her mother, the worrier! "I...I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sound so cruel. That's just how I perceived it." She took a deep breath and slowly let it escape from her lungs, feeling every inch leave her body like they were in some desperate plan to get out of her before they became corrupt. "When I talked to you while you were 'incapacitated'--"
He groaned. "You mean, held against my will."
"Whatever. As I was saying, I began to feel...the love...for you that I used to when we were together. Then I was ashamed of myself. I couldn't look at Pete the same way again." She lowered her head even more. "You don't know what you do to me." She could feel her heart pounding through her chest, growing stronger and stronger as her face flushed.
He smiled. Maybe the gentler side was buried under all the hurt that was there. And then he frowned, remembering how he had treated her so long ago. "Katya, it is so good to talk to you like this again." He took her hands in his, and her face grew redder. "I am truly sorry about old times. I...I lied to you, also."
She looked up, the blush fading. "What do you mean?"
"I never fell out of love with you. I was just...afraid." Now he was blushing!
"Afraid?" Her interest was piqued.
"Um, da...you see...uh...the day after I told you, you know...Logan, Kurt, and I went to the city. To a bar--"
"Oh, how cute!"
"Kitty!" She winced. The only time he called her Kitty was when he was upset with her. "We went to a bar, and I got into a fight with the Juggernaut--"
"Even better!" She clapped.
"Will you," he hissed, and then calmed down and laughed at himself. "I suppose it IS a bit funny, but Logan made me angry." He took one hand and tilted her face up, so to face him. "He knew what I was feeling."
"And that was?"
"I...I am a man, after all, and I had needs--"
"What?!"
He blushed again. "I wasn't looking at you as a little girl anymore." Then she blushed. "I wanted to do...more...adult things."
She smiled; she knew it made her glow and appear a little appealing. "Like...."
"Well, do you know how hard it is to daydream? When Godspodin Xavier is always at the back of your thoughts?" She giggled, and he admired how it made her eyes crinkle. "He shamed me for even thinking about you in such a way. I felt terrible for feeling about you the way that I did. I wanted to go out on dates, to have fun, to dance with you, to look into your eyes, and then...to...." He stopped.
She looked into his eyes. "To make love?"
"Da, that. But everyone reminded me that you were young, and that I should just continue to be the good friend and teammate, and that we could kiss, but nothing else."
She put a finger to his lips and stopped him. She felt him quiver beneath her touch, and she suddenly cursed everyone for ever stopping them from being themselves, for being human! She closed her eyes, and the heat inside her started in her head and then rushed to her toes and back up to just under her stomach. The urge to kiss him then could not be denied.
They kissed, and he found himself growing anxious to be out of there and alone with Kitty. The kiss was soon over, and she began to hum along with the song playing on the radio.
"'I want you to remember, a love so full it could send us all ways. I want you to surrender, all my feelings rose today....'"
She stopped humming and smiled. He gave her a boyish wink, and she barely could bring herself to say, "Check please!"
*********************
She drove while he placed little sweet kisses along her neck. All the attention was making her head spin, and she whispered, "Piotr, please! Wait!"
He straightened himself up in his seat. "Now do you understand why I did what I did? I thought it was for the best. I thought I would save you the embarrassment of Xavier and our friends confronting us about...us."
She nodded. "But I would have faced them and told them to get a life! It would save me years of torture," she whined, but she knew better. They would have told her what color the sky is in the "real" world, and then asked her to bring her silly head out of the clouds. And she, of course, would have yelled, sighed, and then obliged like a good girl.
"I was wrong, Katya. We should have confronted them, and let matters fall where they may. If anything, I could have taken you home to Russia." He slumped in his seat and glared at the floorboard. "Illyana told me to do so. But I was more loyal to being a good "team player" instead of being good to you." His voice strained, and when she glanced at him, he was wiping away tears.
They drove, for the most part, in silence, except for Piotr's choked sobs every now and then. She concentrated on finding a secluded spot for them to stop, and for Piotr to calm down.
She found a nice little off-the-road park surrounded by woods, where they were miles from Salem Center, yet miles from home. She pulled over, brought the car to a halt, and turned the key back to auxiliary. She looked up at him and offered him a grin. "Maybe music will cheer you up?"
Sniffling, he grinned back. "Da, for certain."
She giggled and brought a hand to her forehead, shaking her head in a mocking tone. "The phrase, I told you once, is 'fer sure.'" He reddened, and she moved closer to him, close enough to smell the musky scent that all men secrete. She inhaled it, reveled in his sexy odor, ran her fingers through his jet-black hair, and kissed him gently on his forehead. Her legs weakened when he kissed her back. The secret spot between her legs grew hot and moist, and she squirmed in delight. How long had she waited for the moment they were alone, like this?
The radio played softly in the background. "'You in the dark, you in the pain, you on the run, living your ghost, living your Hell, living your end, never seem to get in the place that I belong; don't wanna lose the time, lose the time to come. Whatever you say, it's alright, whatever you do, it's all good, whatever you say, it's alright. Silence is not the way; we need to talk about it, if Heaven is on the way....You in the sea on a decline breaking the waves, watching the lights go down, letting the cables sleep....'
He looked into her eyes and whispered, "There is no more time for words now." With that he opened his door, walked around the car to her door, opened it, and held out his hand. She didn't hesitate, instead, she grabbed it, almost leaping from her seat in excitement. They wandered down a little dirt path, and not once did she question him, which he was happy about, meaning she trusted him. They came upon a clearing that hadn't been disturbed in a long while. No houses or roads were held snug by the green stretch of hills. Only wildflowers and trees as far as the eye could see....
He could not remember a time that she smelled so fresh or looked so beautiful. It was as if he had wandered upon a live wood nymph there in the valley, and suddenly, he grimaced, wishing that he had his paints and canvas to capture the moment. She shot him a curious look, and then proceeded onward by herself. He followed her (not that watching her walk from that view was so terrible!) to a little pond where wood ducks were bathing and feeding. They didn't even seemed bothered by their presence.
"Wow," she mouthed, gripping his hand.
He stood close to her, and inhaled the aroma of rose and lilac shampoo that she always used on her hair. His fingers itched to run themselves through that glorious soft silk, but she bent next to the water and stared at her reflection. She sighed. "Compared to all this natural beauty, I'm an ugly pimple." She picked up a rock and tossed it at her doppelganger, disturbing the wildlife. Tears fell down her cheeks.
"Oh Katya," he whispered, taking her small hands into his big hands, "let me take away those feelings from you." He kissed her fingers. "You really are a work of art." He pushed her gently to the ground and knelt beside her. He helped her out of her clothes, and she did the same for him though she was too embarrassed to look. Then his hands traveled up and down her flesh, raising goosebumps as they moved. He explored places that no one else had ever been or bothered to go. It felt so good--so right--and she wanted to touch him, but all she could bring herself to do was moan.
And as he watched her moisten her lips with recaptured lust, he felt that everything had just come full circle, and he swooned, knowing that childhood dreams (hers and his) would finally be fulfilled. He marvelled at her naked body, as pink and as soft as rose petals and whispered in her ear, "Are you certain that this is what you want?"
She made herself overcome her girlish shyness and look at his body. How could a man as handsome as him be hers? But she smiled to herself, knowing this was no longer just an enticing daydream that would be intruded upon at any minute. "More than anything," she cooed, and as an afterthought, whispered, "I love you, Piotr."
"I love you also, my Katrina," he whispered back. And he took her gently, as the lights were going down, letting the cables sleep....