Title: Exhaustion
Summary: It started small. He became more and more withdrawn and his eyes grew duller over time. He no longer laughed or reacted to insults. Mustang finally decided to ask him what was wrong. He can't understand why it came to this or how it got this bad without him noticing. Parental!RoyEd. Warnings inside. Longish oneshot. NO SLASH. Rated T because I'm paranoid.
Trigger warnings: Anorexia, fainting, hospitals etc.
Author: xCmalhx
Word count: 3243
Hey guys! I'm really glad you are reading this. I this is the first story that I have actually published so I really hope you think it's good.
You'll have to thank FloofyFox for encouraging me to write my own angsty story because I read hers and they are really good :) I hope you enjoy reading. Sorry if the characters are a bit OOC. It tried my best
Don't like? Don't read. I will grill my hamburgers on any flames but keep them to a minimum. I don't want to burn my burgers :P
If you see a spelling mistake, don't hesitate to let me know. Feedback is also appreciated :)
Credit for cover image goes to uchikun on DevitantArt. Please check out their account :D
It started small, a forced smile here and there and a downcast gaze. Everyone slowly started to notice when Edward Elric became less and less like his usual state and more withdrawn and quiet. He no longer reacted when someone indirectly picked on his size or when someone called his brother 'Fullmetal.' Everyone began to notice when his words were pronounced more carefully and when he started to speak less and smile less. He no longer laughed his usual way, instead let loose a small, fake chuckle. He hunched in on himself, as though to protect himself. Everyone agreed with Mustang when he gave Edward a week off to see if he would cheer up.
When Ed stumbled into Mustang's office week later, Mustang knew immediately that Ed had not improved. Firstly, he didn't kick down the door in his usual way; He just quietly knocked then let himself in. Secondly, he was swaying on his feet slightly, looking pale and withdrawn. His eyes looked dull and his hair was not brushed and in a simple ponytail. As the colonel looked at him closely he could see the heavy bags under his eyes and the pain behind his eyes.
Mustang sighed, "What am I going to do with you?"
Ed did not reply and shrugged, the gesture barely there. He slapped down his report on Mustang's desk without his usual vigour. He slouched over to the couch and slumped down on it. Mustang looked at the report then back at Ed, who looked no better than he did a week ago, he looked much worse. His tiny frame seeming impossibly fragile and thin, as if he would shatter if anyone pushed too hard. Mustang looked away and picked up the report that had be unceremoniously dumped on his desk.
The report was shabby and looked like it had been hastily done in a short period of time. It had several stains on it and a patch of red in the corner. Mustang rubbed his eyes and placed the report back on his desk.
"Can I go?" Ed's quiet voice cracked slightly and was hoarse with disuse. Mustang glanced up in surprise at him. There was a short pause and Mustang studied him closely, taking in the tired face before Ed stood up carefully.
"Fullmetal… Are you okay?" Mustang asked him, an unusual tone of concern in his voice. Edward looked away from him and nodded, as he always did now when someone was worried about him.
"I'm fine." The lie seemed to slip off his tongue as smooth as honey. Mustang sighs and shuffles the papers on his desk in an attempt to look busy, his brow was creased with worry. He looks up at the rustling of clothes and watched as Ed sways slightly on his feet. Mustang stands up abruptly and crosses over to where Ed is standing. He reaches out his hands to steady him.
Ed flinches and takes a wobbly step backward, eyes open as fear flashes across his face, the motion so brief that Mustang barely catches the expression. His eyes merge slowly back into the dullness as the fear vanishes from them. Edward backs further way from the colonel and reaches up a hand to steady himself on the wall. Mustang frowns in frustration.
"Fullmetal, you haven't been yourself lately." He says carefully, "I know something happened and you can talk to me about it." The colonel's voice is uncharacteristically soft. Ed holds up a hand to stop Mustang from coming any closer.
"I'm fine." He repeats like a broken record. "I've just been a little tired, that's all." Ed takes a step sidewards and opens the door. He slips through before Mustang can stop him and stumbles down through the room with Mustang's teammates. Everyone turns and looks at him worriedly as he opens the door that leads to the hallway and runs through.
Ed looks behind him and slows to a walk when he sees that no one is following him. He shoves open the front doors and walks out into the street, heading for his house. He sighs as he feels the dull throb of his automail port aching. He looks up at the sky as a rumble of thunder fills the air and the first drop of rain hits his face. He hurries down to his house, opens the door and slips inside just as the sky opens and heavy rain is released. He takes off his boots and hangs his thick red coat on the hook by the door.
"Alphonse?" He calls as he troops through to the living room and sits down heavily on the couch. He hears a clanking from their bedroom and he turns around to see Al enter the room.
"Brother, I made dinner while you were gone. How did your meeting with the Colonel go?" Alphonse asks him. Ed looked at him and pulled a face, almost seeming like himself again. Then his face fell in an expression of disgust that he worked carefully to conceal behind a blank mask.
"I ate at the mess hall in headquarters." Ed lied, "The colonel was a pain as always." He schooled his expression into an annoyed frown before standing up and yawning.
"You look tired, Niisan, you should probably get some more sleep." Al says worriedly and sigh in relief as Ed nods. He stands up slouches over to their bedroom before settling himself, still full clothed, on his bed. Ed takes off his overcoat and pulls the blanket over himself, making sure that the thick blanket covers his thin frame. He falls instantly into a deep sleep, his malnourished body unable to take the strain of the day's events. Al enters the room quietly and frowns as he sees his brother already asleep. Shrugging, he grabs a book and begins to read from where he left off.
Alphonse is startled from his most recent read from noises coming from the bed opposite him. Al stands up and his armour clanks noisily. He freezes then takes a few cautious steps towards Ed, making sure he is quieter.
"Niisan?" He queries quietly then looks closer as he realises his brother is tossing in his sleep, face creased in pain as he has a nightmare. The blanket covering his brother slithers to the floor and Al bends down to pick it up. He covers his brother and sighs. Then starts in fright as his brother just tosses with renewed vigour. Ed moans and begins to claw at his head with his shaking hands.
"Niisan?" He says again softly then starts as his brother answers him, still asleep.
"Alphonse, I'm so sorry. It's my fault." He mutters incoherently. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Forgive me please."
Al gasps and looks, confused, at his brother.
"Niisan, you didn't do anything. What are you talking about?" He says hesitantly.
His brother twitches in his sleep and lets out a quiet whimper
The phone rings for what seems like forever before a groggy voice answers it.
"Hello?" Mustang mutters, yawning. Alphonse takes a moment to compose himself with no avail.
"Colonel? T-there's something wrong with my b-brother. I-I'm sorry I had no idea who to c-call but you pleasehelpIamsoscaredforhim." Alphonse blurts out, words blending together with the tears that would have fallen long beforehand if Alphonse had a body.
"Alphonse, slow down, I can't hear you properly." Alphonse finally lets out quiet sob and the colonel is immediately worried, the despair in Al's voice is painfully clear.
"I'm scared, Colonel. I c-couldn't help but look at Ed and h-he looks so-" Al breaks off.
Mustang is immediately alert and he look around the room for his clock.
"I'm coming over now, Alphonse. I'll be there in a few minutes." He slams down the phone and rushes to get dressed in plain clothes. He grabs his keys and climbs into his vehicle, turning on the engine. He pulls out onto the road and travels as fast as he can to Ed's house, taking a shortcut down an alleyway.
Al hangs up the phone when he hears the dial tone and rushes to check on his brother who was still sleeping.
"Alphonse!" Ed shouts as he bolts upright in bed, scrambling back to press his back against the wall, still muttering, "Please forgive me."
Al takes a step forward to comfort Ed, whose voice sounded so broken that Al couldn't help himself. Ed eyes are unfocused, staring at something Al can't see before they snap to meet Al's eyes. Ed throws himself back further to the wall and curls up.
"Please stop let me go." He mumbles quietly. Al stares in surprise at his brother. He reaches out a hand and places it on Ed's shoulder. The boy tenses up and then looks at Al, eyes finally focusing on him.
"Al…" He says, relief evident in his tone. Then his eyes widen and he stands up abruptly, pulling his shirt down to cover his stomach again, then throws a blanket over himself.
A knock echoes through the house before the audible click of a door opening startles Al from his frozen position.
"Al, who did you call?" Ed's voice is calm but a flash of anger hides behind his eyes, evident only for a second.
"I'm sorry, niisan. I didn't know what to do, I couldn't wake you up." Al's head tilts down .
"It's nothing," He spat, "I'm fine." Al backs away and looks around as the bedroom door opens.
"Alphonse?" The colonel's voice echoes through the stiff silence that envelops the room. He steps through into the dark room and the door swings closed once more. His eyes adjust to the darkness and he freezes at the scene that awaits him. Ed was standing next to his bed, eyes wild with fear. Al was a few paces away.
"Colonel." Al says in relief.
"What happened?" The colonel demands. He drags his eyes over Ed and takes in the states he's in. Ed's face is drenched with sweat and his hair is messed up and has fallen out of his braid. He considers Ed's golden eyes and sees the fear and pain hidden there. The eyes avoid his gaze.
"It's nothing." Ed says shortly and lies back down on his pillows. "If you don't mind I'm trying to sleep here, so get out." His harsh tone makes Mustang flinch. Mustang sighs in frustration and anger.
"Fine, if you don't want me to help you, you better report to me first thing in the morning to explain why Alphonse called me in the middle of the night." He storms out of the room in a huff and slams the door behind him. Ed sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He jumps and he hears a clanking from next to him and he turns to face Al. Ed casts his gaze downward when he feels Al's worried eyes rest on him.
"It was nothing, Al. I just a bad dream. That's all." He said quietly, "I'll be fine in the morning." Ed rolls over onto his side and faces away from Al. Al sighs stands up. He knows that he won't be able to get his brother to talk to him.
"I'll be in the living room, niisan. So you can sleep better." Al shuffles out the room, metal creaking. Ed rolls over in time to see the bedroom door close and he allows a moment of weakness where he wishes Al would come back. He shakes his head and closes his eyes.
Ed stalks into Mustang's office the next morning with a half-hearted huff. The colonel takes in his dull eyes with a blank mask covering his face and heaves a sigh. He wishes he hadn't lost his temper and stormed out last night.
"Ed, are you okay?" He asks, worried.
Ed's angry golden eyes meet the colonel's onyx eyes and the colonel flinches at the raw pain and brokenness in them. Ed takes a shaky step forward.
"Ed, please let me help you." The colonel's voice is full of concern and he reaches out a hand to touch Ed's head.
"Don't touch me!" Ed spits and slaps his hand away. The colonel is surprised at how weak the action is.
"I don't need anyone's help, I'm fine. There's nothing wrong with me. You're just like my father. He must have believed that there's something wrong with me because he left me and never came back. You can't fix me." Ed says bitterly and sways dangerously. He storms out of the room in a huff and Mustang is left staring at the closed door in surprise from his outburst.
Mustang opens the door but it's too late, Edward is gone. He sighs and walks back to his desk and tries to concentrate on his papers. After a while, he stands up and stretches, unable to focus on the massive amounts of deskwork that faces him. He looks at the clock and realises it's almost past lunchtime. He places a paperweight on the papers and grabs his coat, heading toward the mess hall to grab some lunch.
He is startled when he sees Lieutenant Hawkeye, who points her gun at him.
"Have you finished your paperwork yet, sir?" She asks. Mustang huffs.
"I'm getting some lunch. Then I'll finish." Mustang says tiredly. The Lieutenant hesitates before holstering her gun in one fluid movement. She salutes to the Flame Alchemist as he heads out the door.
The Colonel is joined by Hughes as he walks towards the mess hall. He isn't really listening until Hughes shoves a photo in his face of his daughter.
"Isn't she adorable. Look how big she's getting." Maes coos.
Mustang sighs. "Hughes, There's something wrong with Fullmetal." Maes snaps upright and shoves the photo back into his pocket. He scrutinises the Colonel for a moment before nodding in agreement.
"We have to do something about it." He declares.
Mustang spots Ed up ahead, leaning against the wall heavily. "Looks like he didn't get far." He perceives. He frowns and speeds his walking up. Something's wrong.
"Fullmetal!" He calls out and watches as the alchemist turns to face him.
Ed meets his eyes and smiles. The smile does not reach his eyes. Mustang grows even more worried. Ed isn't the type to smile at him. He tries not to let his worry show. Ed slumps a bit and looks down at the floor.
"Colonel… Everything's fuzzy, I can't think straight." He says, confused.
He shudders and his eyes once again meet the colonels. The golden orbs are hazy and unfocused. Ed takes a stumbling step backward, lips forming words that do not leave his mouth before he musters up the energy to speak again.
"C…nel?" He says, confused before his eyes roll into the back of his head and he collapses into Mustang's arms, who had darted forward to catch the exhausted boy. Mustang pauses as he feels the fragile form in his arms. He lifts Ed up and once again is surprised by how light the boy is. He shouldn't weigh so little, especially because of his automail.
The colonel glances at hughes in worry and nods down to the boy in his arms.
"We need to get him to the hospital and fast." He says. Maes frowns as he takes in the state of Ed.
"No time, we have to take him to the infirmary situated here." He speaks fast and lead the way down the corridor. They pass Mustang's office and the door is open, revealing the concerned faces of his crew. They pass without a word, intent on getting Ed to the infirmary. His team follows.
Mustang looks down and winces as he catches a glance of the distinct outline of Ed's body. The boy is tiny and his automail looks huge in contrast to his other pale arm. How could he not have noticed? He inwardly curses himself.
A large dorr ahead labelled infirmary greets them and they hurry though, calling for a medic. A woman dressed in white rushes over. She looks at the form in his arms and nods to a bed in the corner.
"Lay him down there." She instructs the Colonel. "Do you know what happened to him?"
The Colonel looks guilty. "I think this has been going on for a while. I haven't seen him eating and I had to go over to his house yesterday because his brother called. He looked really pale. I think he had a bad nightmare, maybe several have happened over the past few week or even months." He says in a rush. The nurse frowns at the news.
She walks over to the bed that Mustang had just lay Ed onto. She conducts a quick but through examination. She sighs and steps away from the bed. She turns to address Mustang and the rest of his team that had followed the Colonel through the door.
"I'm afraid he's extremely malnourished and he has been suffering from lack of sleep. I'll have to keep him for at least a few months for rehabilitation. Treatment for anorexia can include…" He voice fades away as Mustang steps back with thoughts running through his head.
How could he not have noticed? How did it get to this without him noticing? Ed should have come to him. Mustang can't help but feel a terrible sense of guilt. He should have noticed. All he could do was tease Ed.
The nurse moves away to attend to another patient as Mustang's team surround him. Hawkeye looks at him with sympathy. Hughes watches Ed whose tiny form is silhouetted against the crisp, white sheets. Breda looks consumed by guilt as well. Havoc looks at Ed and lights another cigarette, needing something to distract him. Fuery and Falman turn to each other an exchange glances.
"We'll wait outside, sir." Hawkeyes says and ushers everyone outside besides Mustang with her gun. They salute and walk out, closing the door behind them.
Mustangs spares them a brief glace and salutes in return. He turns back to Ed and picks up his hand. He clutches it like a lifeline as he takes in Ed's face. The dark circles under his eyes are even more visible as they contrast with his pale skin.
"I'll stay with you as long as you need me to. You will get better." He pledges. "I will wait until you get better."
He brushes a golden hair out of Ed's face and smiles sadly.
Two months later (Time skip)
Ed slams open the door to the Flame Alchemist's office for the first time in a long time. The Colonel looks up and smiles before covering it up with a smirk.
"That's a little more like the Fullmetal I know." He says. You could almost see the steam coming out of Ed's ears.
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A PIPSQUEAK MIDGET WHO CAN'T EVEN GO TO THE BEACH BECAUSE HE'S SO SMALL, HE'D SINK INTO THE SAND AND WHEN THE TIDE COMES IN HE DOSEN'T SINK OR HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT DROWNING BECAUSE HE'S SO MICROSCOPIC HE CAN BREATHE ALL THE OXYGEN ATOMS IN THE WATER!?" Ed fumes, trying to jump kick the Colonel in the face. Mustang steps aside and he goes flying into a wall.
"Dammit!" He yells, arms flailing. The Colonel just smirks at him.
That's the Edward Elric we know and love.
Whoo seven pages! I'm pretty proud of this. It took a while to write.
I hope you liked my story! Please review, favourite and follow. Constructive criticism is welcomed for the next oneshot I write. Just don't be too harsh and say its 'constructive criticism' please. Thanks :)
Until next time.
Cmalh out!