Let Go By Moonlight Eternal
I don't think we ever thought of one another as best friends. Or maybe we did...it was long ago, I can't remember much anymore. But whatever we were then, it doesn't matter now. We were close, that was for sure. And yet, I always knew she was different. For some reason, no matter how tight nit I thought we were all those years ago, there was always some nagging thought at the back of my mind.
Usagi and I were friends since grade school. We met hap-hazardously. Usagi, even as a first grade student, was the same, bubbly, happy, innocent, and continuously tardy. Even on her first day of school, with her mother driving here there, she managed to be late. Perhaps it was partially because she'd just moved. Upon our first meeting, she walked straight into me as my own mother and I made out way to my new classroom. And somehow, we bonded, to at least some extent.
All through elementary years, we remained friends. I guess we were even best friends...and although I'd been warned that some friendships just didn't last once you get to middle school, it never crossed my mind once that Usagi Tsukino wouldn't always be there for me. She didn't strike me as the type. But I guess not everything is what it seems.
Towards the end of our 8th grade year, that's when that feeling, that constant dread which had always been there but never really threatened my happiness, that's when it became so vibrant that I could almost see her departing figure walking away from my life forever. Strangely enough, that was when first Sailor Moon appeared. And after some time, I came to accept that Usagi Tsukino, my imperfect friends, and Sailor Moon, a heroine of legend, were the same. After all, I was saved so many times physically by Sailor Moon and Usagi saved me emotionally just as frequently if not more, so how could I not recognize the strange resemblance between the two characters... And that was when we began to drift. At first, I tried to fight it. How can one easily let go of someone they hold dear? But after a while, the eminent withdrawal of her in my own existence became clear, so what else could I do but let her go? However, I tried not to forget her. And I did try to prevent it.
At first, I attempted to distance myself from her a bit, to see if she'd notice. Unfortunately, before I could get far enough away for her to observe, I met him. But I don't think of it as an unfortunate thing, really. Perhaps, had he not come into my life, I would have been able to persuade Usagi to tell me everything, and to remain my loyal friend. Once I fell in love with him, though, everything changed. And as I held his dying body in my arms, with whom I knew to be Usagi looking on, I learned the hard way that sometimes you just have to let go.
I can say I am now happy, all these years later. I am happy to have found a new love, perhaps not as passionate as the first I had at such a young age of 14, and I have new friends to not necessarily replace but to fill the gap that older ones do not. And, I am happy to watch her from afar. My lady Neo-Queen Serenity...I am sure she was once my dear friend Usagi Tsukino. And knowing that she found those to love, knowing that she lived a destiny I can only imagine, that is fulfillment enough in my life. Have I really let go? I believe in a way I have. Some things are best left as only memories.
But have I really let go...
Naru Osaka, 3rd Year of Crystal Tokyo
AN: I thought this story up only today (November 26 03) and decided it was worth writing down on paper. I was inspired by a friendship of my own which...dwindled after we went our separate ways in middle school. That person meant a lot to me, she was like a sister, and even though in the end it only meant a lot of internal pain on my part, I finally accepted that she had chosen to take her life a different way, and that was when I was finally able to make new beginnings.
But I will never really let go.
Moonlight Eternal