"LILY! Please hurry we're already late the driver is waiting to leave! Lillian I mean now!" That ladies and gentlemen is the sound of my irritated mother and yes you heard correctly 'the driver' is in fact waiting at this very moment to take to me my "unveiling" as my dear old mum worded it. I call it -show off your daughter hour, stick her in a tight itchy dress, make her talk to tons and tons of older men -who my I add give her suggestive looks- while they're clueless wives try and set her up with they're spawn of Satan sons.
Yes quite a mouthful. Hey that's life, I Lillian Pilot Elizabeth Evans II, am in fact a member of one of the most prominent families around, we're recognized practically everywhere we go. This being because my parents are personal friends of The Queen, yes I said The Queen. This is why I am rushing around on this lovely evening getting ready to attend this dreadful 'unveiling' –yuck.
"Lillian Pilot Elizabeth!" Uh oh the full name. "I'm coming!" I yell helplessly as I stumble down the stairs and land on my behind- did I mention I have a tendency of falling a lot- "For Christ sakes Lillian I hope you don't plan on making that entrance tonight" Scolded my mother. Honestly what does this women think of me.
"Of course mum, I plan on tripping inside; you know making sure I hit everyone on my way in, while completely ripping off my dress and having the media take pictures of me in hot pink underpants then run out of the hall screaming bloody murder- ah yes the perfect evening" I add sarcastically.
"That is not funny young lady." That sure shut up the giggling maids, "This is a very important night, I expect you to be on your best behavior- plus there is someone very special I would like you to meet." Added my mother with an unusual glint in her eye- oh lord she's up to something, "oh goody another randy geezer gawking at me whoopee" I mutter under my breathe as I step into the awaiting limousine. "Pardon I didn't catch that"- "nothing" I say quickly.
"So where's father" I ask in a weak attempt to point the conversation in a different direction. "You didn't expect him to stick around all night waiting for you, honestly Lily he's already gone and to think he wanted to see you before he left…" Ops wrong direction. This is how most of the car ride is, me making irrelevant comments and my mother ranting about how incompetent I am.
"Lillian darling, we've arrived- oh my look at the media, smile love" she says as we get out of the limousine. I'm shocked, I mean I literally can not move from fear of falling- there are cameras everywhere and- oh no! Someone's attempting to talk to me. I think I'm going to be sick and it's going to be all over the news, I'll be the laughing stock of the whole upper class community. I'll never come out of my house let alone my room again. I'll become an outcast and turn into a crazy lady, who at forty still lives with her parents and retells old stories of her past to her millions and millions of cats.
Thankfully before I can hyperventilate completely I feel pressure on my side that brings my out of my trance, and sure enough my mother is jabbing me with the end of her purse, it seems the reporter has been asking me the same question for five minutes now.
"Excuse her, she's feeling ill" thank goodness for my mother- wait did I really just think that- "Lillian start walking" she hisses in my ear. I start walking looking down at my feet to make sure I don't fall, which in turn would be worse. "Look up and smile" she hisses again through her smile- hesitantly I look up and add a smile to my horrified face. Once we step into the entrance of the building I start being pushed toward the grand hall- where the party is taking place.
"Wait here" the concierge tells us. "Wait for what" I ask looking completely dumbfounded. "For the announcement of course" he answers my question looking irritated. "Announcement?" I say again, by now my mother is sending me dirty looks between her smiles, so I gladly return them. Within five minutes the concierge is leading us to the entrance of the great hall, he nods at a man standing just inside the doors- and then I hear it, this man says "Presenting Lady Emmline Evans" my mother steps out leaving me all alone in the entrance- oh no please no! "Lady Lillian Pilot Elizabeth Evans II." I think I just died.