{{A/N: *Originally Titled "A Nice Man"*until the muse decided to run all the way through a serial with it, making "A Nice Man" Part 1/5 As such, this story has been renamed}}

~~**S**~~

The Ace Princess and the SuperPirate
By Bren Ren

~*S*~

Summary: Just a little bit of fluff inspired by my favorite Star Wars couple of all time. You know, the one with Han and Leia in Empire Strikes Back & Return of the Jedi. Parody. Definitely Parody.

~*S*~
Part One:
A Nice Man
~*S*~

Summary: Just a little bit of fluff inspired by my favorite Star Wars scene of all time. You know, the one with Han and Leia on the Falcon inside the belly of the asteroid worm in Empire Strikes Back. Oh yeah, you know it! I'm talkin' 'bout the KISSY scene! :P

Rating: All Audiences Approved

Disclaimer: Well, since this could be considered parody here, and since I'm not makin' a dime, let's just call it even.

~*S*~

Clark was trying to juggle a few too many office supplies in the dimly lit storage closet, and his precarious pile of binders, note pads, staplers, and post-its nearly came crashing down as Lois barreled in through the door at dam-the-torpedoes full-speed-ahead. So intent on preventing the spill, he didn't even realize she was in the room until she practically jerked half his load out of his hands.

"Hey! Easy! I had these first," Clark snapped defensively while continuing his comical juggling act. "There are plenty more supplies!" He finally stopped fighting over a stapler when he finally looked at who the hand holding the other end belonged to. "Lois?!"

"Easy there, Smallville! I'm only trying to help," she snapped back. Lois released her end of the office tool and Clark stumbled back a step.

Clark shook his head with a wry, defeated grin. "Do really have to keep calling me that?"

"Well, no, Clark," she replied with due exaggeration in her emphasis. "I guess I don't." She shook her head with her own wry, self-deprecating smirk. "I really do make things difficult, sometimes, don't I?"

"You do," Clark agreed. "You really do. You could be nicer sometimes. Come one, admit it, sometimes you think I'm all right."

"Sometimes," she agreed, but there was still a healthy dose of teasing in her tone. "Maybe. When you're not acting like such a nice guy."

"'A nice guy?'" Clark repeated. "A nice guy," he said again, his tone growing softer and yet strangely menacing somehow. Clark had been slowly advancing on her and by now had Lois backed into a corner with her back against the wall. "Do you want to know what I think?" She tried to skirt around him, but he brought both arms up to either side of her head, and as the forgotten supplies they'd just nearly come to blows over clattered to the floor around them, Lois was quite effectively pinned in place.

"No." Her eyes flared, and combined with her flushed cheeks, she could have been the portrait of outraged indignation. But she wasn't.

"I think you like me because I'm a nice man." She laughed, and not kindly. Clark brought his head in very close to hers, and as his breath tickled her ear, so too did the flutter of his lips against the soft shell of her earlobe. "There haven't been enough nice men in your life."

A shiver rippled through her and she fought for all she was worth against the tingle-pricking-goose-pimples that sprang out all across her skin, but it was a futile battle. "I happen to like liking bad boys."

Clark tipped his head back a few scant degrees with a quirky arch of his right brow. "I can be a bad boy."

Lois snorted, but it was somehow actually pretty sexy. "On what planet?"

"On any planet you'd like me to take you to." Clark's eyes and jaw set with steely determined confidence.

"You need to lay off the Kool-aid, nice guy." Her breath was coming in short almost-panting little gasps now, and the blush was spreading to warm her whole face.

He leaned back in ever so slightly. "You might like the Kool-aid if you tried it." Their noses rubbed together as her tipped his face to the other side.

She sucked in a heady snout-full of musky, alluring Clark-scent, and her eyes flared with her last remaining shards of defiance. "I don't think so—

Her last reply was cut off short when his lips came down on hers and didn't even leave enough room for oxygen particles to escape, never mind words. For a very long time, only the soft, sweet sounds of kissy noises could be heard in the dark storage room deep in the Daily Planet basement.

"Clark, we're going to need more file folders too—Oh. I see you've got your hands busy."

Clark and Lois jumped out of their lip-locked embrace with decidedly guilty expressions darkening both of their features in the dim light to find Chloe standing in the doorway. The shadowing cast on her from the much brighter exterior room may have left her in silhouette, but they could still clearly make out the smug smile gracing her face. She crossed her arms in front of her chest as if physically holding back her chuckles.

"Umm… Chloe was just, uh…" Clark sputtered. "She was helping me organize some research," he finally managed after a deep breath. "Since you were out chasing leads of your own."

Lois eyed him critically for a moment, just long enough to make him almost start to squirm before letting him off the hook with an easy smile. "Well, my leads dead-ended, so why don't I give you a hand?" At the slight snort from her cousin, Lois added, "Professionally speaking."

A doubting "Uh huh," was all the response she got from Chloe.

Clark shook his head in defeat. "With friends like you..."

"You'd be lost without me," Chloe answered as the trio gathered the mess of supplies Clark had dropped in that little tryst. "And you know it," she added for good measure as they all exited to supply closet.

~*S*~