A/N: Words in Italics are the song lyrics.
I reached for you this morning,
woke up with empty arms.
Once again it's sinking in,
how far away you are
Celia slowly opened her eyes. She rolled to face the other side of her bed with a smile on her face. But she saw nothing but empty bed. Her smile vanished in a heartbeat. Even though he got up early to work on the farm he was usually there to greet her when she woke up. But he was truly gone. He wasn't going to be back… Ever.
Celia slowly got up and looked over at the sleeping little girl in her own bed. Her chocolate hair fanned out and a bit messy. She slept so soundly, even through the many nights Celia had woken up sobbing.
I still pour two cups of coffee
and tell you all about my dreams.
This kitchen's way to quiet,
you should still be here with me.
"It was really incredible. I felt like I was at the ocean. It was so realistic I could almost smell it." Celia took a sip of coffee and held back the tears as she looked at the empty seat across from her. A cup of coffee sat there, untouched. She was so use to pouring two cups, it would take her years to get out of the habit. She looked around the rest of the kitchen. It was quiet except for the birds outside chirping. Celia sighed and finished her cup of coffee. She set hers aside and grabbed his. There was no point in wasting it.
And even though I cry like crazy,
even though it hurts so bad.
I'm thankful for the time god gave me
even though we couldn't make it last.
I'm learning how to live without you,
even though I don't want to
and even with you gone love lives on.
"Mom! Mom! Look what I found." Julie came running up to Celia with four eggs in her arms.
"Slow down sweetie. You don't want to drop those eggs." Celia gave a soft smile to her beaming daughter. She put three of the eggs in the shipping bin and put the fourth one in an egg carton that would later go in their fridge. Celia checked to make sure everything was in the shipping bin, five bottles of milk, three eggs, six potatoes, and eight tomatoes. Life hadn't been the easiest since Jack died, but Celia was making it through.
No one had expected him to be gone so quickly. He was usually such a fit and healthy person. He was strong from taking care of the farm and he took a jog with Wally a couple times a week. But when a simple cold turned for the worst being healthy wasn't going to help.
Sometimes Celia just wanted to break down and cry. But seeing her daughter's bright face and remembering the good times she had with Jack were good enough to keep her from breaking down.
I still call your mom on Sunday,
it's good to hear her voice.
She always tells me that same story
about her stubborn little boy.
Vesta always helped Celia through rough patches. Sometimes Celia would bring Julie to visit Vesta and she would tell them some story. Usually it was the fight over Celia between Marlin and Jack. Julie always seemed to long the fact that her dad was so sweet to her mom, and that he never gave up trying to win her.
And I kept your favorite t-shirt
you know the one I used to hate.
Ain't it funny how it's the one thing I
I just can't throw away.
"Good night Julie." Celia kissed her daughter's forehead as Julie drifted off into sleep. Celia walked over and sat down on her bed. She was tired but not ready to go to sleep. She got up and walked over to the dresser. She started to pull out her nightgown when she noticed a plaid shirt folded, though a bit crumpled, in the draw. She set her nightgown and picked the shirt up instead. Celia held it up to her nose; it still smelled a bit like him. She grabbed a pair of sweats and put them those and the shirt on instead of her nightgown. Celia curled up under the cover and held the sleeve up to her nose. She fell asleep almost instantly.
She comes with me on your birthday
little flowers in her hands.
She's always known there's something missing
but to young to understand.
"Mommy, these flowers are so pretty." Celia smiled. Julie had on a yellow summer dress and the two of them had made a crown of flowers that was sitting on Julie's head. Julie also held a tiny bouquet of wildflowers the two of them had found.
"Come on Julie. It's time to go." The two of them walked over to the little graveyard the sat on the hill across from Celia's old home. There were only three graves there, but Romana's gravestone was ready for the day. Celia and Julie stood in front of the newest gravestone. The ground around it already looked normal, the grass was the same color as the rest of the hill.
"Mommy that's today date!" Julie pointed to Jack's birthday. Celia couldn't help but smile. She knelt down and gave her daughter a big hug.
"Yes it is sweetie. That's Daddy birthday." Celia took Julie's hand and placed the flowers down in front of the grave. Celia tried to hold back her tears. It was too painful. Poor Julie didn't realize that her dad was gone.
And even though I cry like crazy,
even though it hurts so bad.
I'm thankful for the time god gave me
even though we couldn't make it last.
I'm learning how to live without you,
even though I don't want to
and even with you gone love lives on.
Celia tucked in her sleeping daughter. She went over, sat down on her bed, and picked up the photo of the three of them only three months before… She smiled but didn't cry. She knew he had been there. And he would have never left if he wanted to. Her loved the both of them two much. She set the photo down and lay down on the bed. Maybe tonight would be okay for once. He was with her no matter what.
I reached for you this morning,
woke up with empty arms.
A/N: Sad right? Beautiful song. Be warned, it is country for all those people who don't like country. Hope you like it! :)