Forgive the Lie
By: Lady Saffir
Rating: G
DISCLAIMER: I am not Cassandra Clare. I am just playing with her characters for a little bit.
I'm stuck on another story, and after reading the excerpt from CoG this little piece popped into my mind. Hope you enjoy!
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No.
The single word echoed through his head as he listened to Clary's excited words. He didn't care that the chance to finally wake her (their!) mother was offered. He didn't care that she was excited at the prospect of going to Idris and finally seeing the Nephilim home land. The only thing that mattered was that she couldn't go. The Clave was sure to find out what she could do with runes and then they would take her and use her up until she was a dry shell of herself. Why couldn't she see this?
He could practically feel the blood draining from his face. When he had first met her in the entryway, her face alight with joy and hope, he had allowed himself for a brief moment to hope that she was coming to tell him she didn't care what the world thought of their relationship.
His heart had fractured as he listened to the words pour from her lips even as he mocked himself for daring to hope. What right did he have to her affections?
The only affections he could publicly claim were those of family.
It was futile, he knew, to try and persuade Clary from her chosen path. She was stubborn and hard headed and more than lived up to the cliché that redheads were temperamental, but he had to make her understand. He couldn't lose her to the Clave. They wouldn't allow him to stay in Alicante and he couldn't bear to be parted from her. It had been sheer torture to not speak to her or see her for two days. How could he tolerate the vast miles between them?
Hear what I can't say out loud! Jace thought, ignoring the shock that jolted through his fingertips when he accidently touched Clary's skin.
"Let me do it," he pleaded.
Clary's arguments only fueled his anger and his despair. Why couldn't she hear him? She was the one person that always saw through him. Why couldn't she do that now?
"I'll do whatever," he swore. Was his voice shaking? He cursed himself a weakling for being so obvious. Why was Clary always able to so easily pull forth his emotions? What was so special about her, anyway?
Jace laughed at himself. He knew why Clary was so special to him, and it had nothing to do with familial affection. He wanted her, and he couldn't have her. And if he couldn't have her, then neither could the Clave. He had to make her see reason, make her see the only thing that would allow him to go to Idris and endure the endless scrutiny and murmurs would be knowing that she was safe.
His anger overcame his attempt to remain calm and logical. She wouldn't listen to him, just as he'd known, but he had to at least try. And as he watched the elevator descend he acknowledged the only way to keep her safe was to lie. She would hate him when she found out what he had done, but at least she would be safe. Luke would keep her safe.
He only hoped he would be able to return and spend however long it took to gain her forgiveness.