Quinn sighed as she admired the sparkly pink snowflakes on the journal her father had so carelessly mailed to her for Christmas. She hadn't seen or spoken to him since he kicked her out of the house upon finding out she was pregnant. Quinn wasn't sure why he even bothered. His gifts were always so impersonal. They never came from the heart. He was never one to show emotion. She'd never seen him cry or be sad. She'd seen him mad though. Several times. Quinn didn't want to think about the time he was the angriest she'd ever seen him. The day he found out his baby girl was going to have a baby of her own.

Of her own. The words had an annoying ring in Quinn's head. Her baby girl wasn't her own anymore. Her angel now belonged to Shelby Corcoran, and she was never going to get her back. Until now, Quinn had learned to ignore the dull ache that still remained in her heart from saying goodbye to Beth. Her Beth. She didn't even try to shake that thought out of her head. In her heart, she knew that Beth was still hers. She was a mother, like it or not. She may not be the one raising her daughter, but the pain that lingered in her heart was that of mother missing her child. Quinn couldn't take it anymore. She needed a way to express her feelings, her thoughts, and her love for her daughter.

Suddenly the gift made sense. Quinn opened the journal, grabbed her favorite purple pen from the Tinker Bell mug she got from Brittany, and started writing.

Dear Beth,

It's been seven months since you were born. Wow. Has it really been that long? It feels like it's been an eternity. Every day since I came home from the hospital has been a matter of survival. For the longest time, all I thought about was the fact that I didn't have you with me. When Mr. Schuester and Puck (he's your dad) sang "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" I imagined him singing to you as you fell asleep. Just thinking about it now makes me cry. We could've been the perfect family. The three of us. Anyway...

I spent most of the summer in the nursery my mom made for you. I sat in the rocking chair, crying and praying, day and night. That room held and still holds every piece of evidence I have that ever belonged to me. The ultrasound pictures. Pictures of me as I stomach kept getting bigger and bigger. The clothes my mother bought for you are still in the dresser waiting to be used. But they won't be. That's also where I keep the monthly update packages I get from Shelby. She sends me pictures every month to show me how you're doing. I look at them every free second I get. As I said before, you're seven months now which means I should be getting another one soon. I can't wait.

I don't have the heart to tell Mom to get rid of the nursery. As much as a painful reminder it is that you're not here, it's also a reminder that you still exist. Normally I hate those stupid text emoticons, but I 3 you Beth. I really do. If you've ever thought even for a second (which, knowing the situation, you probably have) that I gave you up because I didn't love you or want you, you were absolutely wrong. To this day, I want nothing more than to hold you and tell you exactly how much I love you. Such feelings probably can't be described in words. I love you more than you can imagine, even if it doesn't seem like it. But enough about me.

You probably have a great life with Shelby. I'm sure she got you involved with the Glee club at school, but if she didn't that's OK too. Just a little word of advice. If you became a cheerleader like me, do NOT, under any circumstances, get involved with the star football player. It's such a cliché, and it just messed everything up for me. Not that I didn't love Finn. It just made things a lot more complicated. Also, stay away from wine coolers. That's why you're here in the first place. However, that's another story for another time.

I'm going to end this letter here, but I want you to know that I plan on writing many more in the future. So for now I'll just say that I hope you're happy with your life because that's the whole reason I did what I did. Shelby could give you a much better life than I could. That's just the truth. The reality. I hope you love Shelby as much as I know she loves you. She deserves your love. Everyone deserves a second chance. She didn't get the chance to be Rachel's mom until much later on. As much as I hate to admit it, Rachel Berry's proving to be a pretty great big sister. Half the pictures I get of you are with her smiling a huge obnoxious smile. She's proud of you, you know. And so am I. I love you.

From,

Quinn (or Mom, whatever)