A/N- This is my first fic, please leave reviews. Note: I don't own either glee or the characters involved.
Enjoy :)
Hypothetically
She was sitting curled up in a ball in the corner of the empty choir room when Quinn walked in. "Rach?" Quinn whispered looking at the small girl.
The sweet nasally voice sent a flutter through Rachel's chest. "Mmmmm" she hummed back, trying to stifle a sob.
"Are you okay?" Quinn asked, walking closer and hovering over the cowering mess of Rachel Berry.
All Rachel could do was look up at Quinn and send her a sarcastic look. "What do you think?"
The question didn't really require an answer, but Quinn answered anyway. "What do I think?" she mused "I think you're upset about nationals"
"No shit" Rachel choked out rolling her eyes at the blonde stating the obvious.
Quinn sat down next to the girl and wrapped her arm around Rachel's shoulders pulling her into a hug. "But it's more than that, isn't it?"
Rachel rested her head on Quinn's shoulder "I ruined it Quinn. I wrecked it for everyone."
"Because you kissed Finn?"
"Because I kissed Finn"
"I highly doubt that you kissing Finn had anything to do with our loss Rach. We all knew we had no chance at winning Nationals, we hadn't even prepared a song before we arrived in New York" Quinn replied rubbing her thumb along the soft fabric of Rachel's cardigan.
"Why are you being so understanding Quinn?" Rachel sat up and turned to face the blonde "You only just broke up with Finn, you should hate me"
Quinn reached up and wiped a tear away from Rachel's eye. "Do you love him Rach?"
Rachel drew in a breath sharply "No..." She sighed in response.
"Then why did you kiss him?"
"Because he kissed me"
"You kissed him back though"
"He likes me"
"A lot of people like you Rachel"
"Not like that though. I mean Finn really likes me."
"A lot of people will like you like that Rach. You're beautiful"
"What, my sparkling personality?" Rachel huffed "My compulsive need to be a star drives people away Quinn. It drives everybody away."
"Looking for compliments are we now?" Quinn laughed searching Rachel's eyes. "You're ambition doesn't drive people away. Everyone is just scared of your talent, scared of how amazing you are. Nobody can compare to you Rachel, your personality is beautiful. But being the shallow person that I am, I was referring to your physical beauty. If you had some confidence everyone would see it"
Rachel rolled her eyes again "You're not shallow Quinn, you are one of the most giving people I know. It's just masked by your need to be popular"
"We're quite a pair then" Quinn laughed "Our need to be known ends up being our biggest downfall"
Rachel gave a sad smile "It won't always be this way though, once we get out of small town Ohio and into the big world that awaits us, maybe we can be ourselves"
"When did you get so inspirational" Quinn smiled
"There's a lot you don't know about me Quinn Fabray"
A forlorn look passed across Quinn's hazel eyes
"Quinn?" Rachel inquired catching the fleeting look
"Rach?" Quinn replied trying to sound nonchalant
"Do you still like Finn?" Rachel asked, assuming the look in Quinn's eyes was due to her recent breakup.
"I never did." Quinn replied looking away
"Then why did you go out with him? Why did you put up with all of his shit?"
"The same reason as you. He liked me. It was easy, convenient. I was the head cheerleader; he was the quarterback so it was expected of us"
"It was easy and convenient? Quinn you could have any guy you wanted. They all drool when you walk past them in the hallway, you are the girl of every single one of their dreams"
Quinn turned her head back facing Rachel looking her in the eyes "But that's the problem isn't it? I'm the girl of their dreams but they're not the person of mine"
"Then who is this person then? Who is it that doesn't want you back? I can't think of anyone in this entire school."
Rachel obviously didn't quite understand what Quinn was trying to get at. There was no guy at this school that was the person of her dreams, so how could she possibly answer her question.
Mistaking the lack of an answer and the pained look that had appeared on Quinn's face of an admission of not wanting to name anyone, Rachel added "Hypothetically of course"
Quinn sighed and closed her eyes. What was she scared of? It wasn't as though she was friends with Berry. She won't even have to see her for another couple of weeks over summer.
To hell with it Quinn decided as a surge of confidence came over her. It's not as though this was ever going to have a positive outcome
"Hypothetically?" She half questioned, half reminded Rachel. She did after all want to leave this room with some sort of dignity intact.
"Hypothetically" Rachel assured her.
"Well then what if I said- hypothetically of course- that it's you? That I love you Rach, that I have since sophomore year. Then what would you say?" Quinn replied, yet again averting her eyes to avoid Rachel's.
A shiver ran down Rachel's spine for a reason the girl could not pinpoint. This was going in completely the opposite direction to which Rachel had initially thought it would. Although now that she thinks about it why had she even asked in the first place who Quinn liked? She wasn't the girl's friend; hell the girl had made fun of her relentlessly since sophomore year. Sophomore Year.
Things were starting to make sense in Rachel's head. Not only Quinn's actions and hurtful words towards her since last year but also the way she felt about Quinn. She had always assumed her feelings were normal for girls in high school. That it was normal for her to kind of hero-worship Quinn, she was after all the top of the social hierarchy. But none of the other girls seemed to look at Quinn the way Rachel did when the girl walked by in the locker room after gym, or mutter admiring comments as the head cheerio strutted by down the school corridor. Rachel had just come to the conclusion that she just wasn't as good as keeping these words and feelings inside as the other girls around her were. But on reflection now, she realised it had nothing to do with her loud personality or need to share what she was thinking or feeling with everyone around her, and everything to do with the fact that she was in love with Quinn Fabray.
This realisation shook her to the core. Everything was crystal clear now. She loved Quinn Fabray. The same Quinn Fabray that was sitting in front of her right now supposedly telling Rachel that she loved her. That she had loved her since Sophomore Year. Then why wasn't she saying anything? Why hadn't she replied to Quinn? It would be so easy.
I love you too Quinn.
I'm in love with you as well Quinn Fabray
I love you, I love you, I love you
But what if Quinn was just joking? That this wasn't just a joke to trick poor, gullible Rachel- the Unholy Trinity's play thing. How did Rachel know that Santana and Brittany weren't hiding around the corner filming this whole exchange, only to post this on every social networking site and mock her relentlessly?
"It's okay Rach..." Quinn said regretfully, standing up. "Have a good summer"
Quinn turned and walked out of the room leaving a paranoid Rachel in her wake.
"No stop..." Rachel whispered after her as the blonde exited the room, too quiet for the girl to hear.
Rachel couldn't sleep that night. She lay in her bed and thought about Quinn Fabray, Finn being a long lost though of the past. Quinn Fabray loves her! Maybe, if this wasn't a prank. But if it wasn't a prank then Quinn Fabray loves her. Quinn. Fucking. Fabray. Loves. Her. Rachel rolled over and grinned into her pillow. And Rachel loved Quinn, which was finally-after so long, clear to her. Gay for Fabray! Rachel giggled at her own cheesiness.
Quinn couldn't sleep either. Why had she told Rachel? It was a stupid, stupid idea. Quinn rolled over and thumped her fist into her pillow. Rachel hadn't even known how to respond, she just sat there probably disgusted by Quinn. A tear rolled down Quinn's cheek and she choked back a sob. She had ruined everything, now she wouldn't even be able to stare at Rachel in the same way again without the girl noticing. No more admiring her ass, or her legs or hips or sexy collar bones. That was all ruined now. Quinn's phone vibrated beside her and her heart lifted. Was it Rachel? Could it possibly be her? Did she even have her number?
Santana.
Quinn's heart dropped and a fresh wave of sobs rocked her.
"San?" Quinn answered the phone, needing to speak with her best friend. Possibly one of the only people who would understand in this town.
"Q?" Santana queried, hearing Quinn's voice break over the phone. "What's wrong love?"
Quinn just lay in her bed trying to hold back the sobs.
"I'll be right over." Santana said into the phone and hung up.
A few minutes later Santana's car pulled up in the Fabray's driveway and she let herself in, making her way up to her best friend's bedroom. Quinn was hiding under the duvet still crying and hiccupping. Santana sat down next to the lump under the covers and tried to pry it back. "Q?" She asked the mass of short blonde hair that was now poking out.
Quinn crawled out from under the duvet and sat crossed legged facing Santana. She looked and absolute mess. "I told her San." She stated, staring down at her hands.
"Berry?" Santana replied knowingly, trying to get Quinn to look at her.
Quinn lifted her head and gave Santana a confused look.
"You love her don't you?" Santana asked
Quinn looked away again. "How do you know?" She asked.
"It's obvious love. You look at her as though you want to tear her clothes off and take her right then and there."
Quinn's cheeks flushed red and she looked up. "I told her"
"You said"
Silence.
Santana shuffled forward and wrapped the blonde in a tight embrace. Quinn relaxed into her arms and started sobbing again. "I shouldn't have said anything San. I shouldn't have said anything."
"You had to Q. It's been going on for too long" Santana replied stroking Quinn's hair.
They stayed this way until Quinn fell asleep in Santana's arms.
The next morning Rachel jumped out of bed with a mission. She no longer cared whether or not Quinn's admission was just another cruel joke, she was going to tell the girl she had idolised since freshman year that she loved her.
Quinn's house was only a mile or two away from Rachel's so she set out on foot and set a brisk pace. As she rounded the corner that brought Quinn's house into sight she saw Santana walking out the Fabray's front door. This was almost enough to make Rachel turn back, but dammit Rachel was nothing if not determined when she had a mission to complete. Santana saw her and smiled as she pulled into her car. "Good luck Berry" she winked out of the open window as she reversed out of the driveway.
Rachel took a deep breath and knocked on the big wooden door. What seemed like an eternity had passed before Judy Fabray opened the door. Rachel swallowed and asked "I was just looking for... Quinn".
Mrs. Fabray smiled warmly and opened the door wider "She's just up in her room. Second door on the right up the stairs".
Rachel thanked her and walked past her up to Quinn's room with her head held high. If only Mrs. Fabray knew why Rachel was really here.
It took Rachel a few moments to compose herself before she knocked on Quinn's closed bedroom door. After a few seconds a confident "Come in" sounded from behind the door. Rachel walked into the room closing the door behind her. Quinn was curled up on a window seat reading a leather-bound book. She looked absolutely stunning with the sun hitting her golden hair at exactly the right angle, wearing a pair of running shorts and a loose fitting cheerio's t-shirt. The casual look about her made her appear even more amazing than usual. Rachel was lost for words as what she could only describe as the angelic form in front of her looked up.
"Rachel!" Quinn gasped shooting out of her seat, dropping the book on the floor losing her page. A look of panic crossed her face as she looked at Rachel.
"I..." Rachel started, forgetting what she came here to do as she got lost in Quinn Fabray. She wrung her hands together and tried again. "I just wanted to say, were you being serious yesterday in the choir room. I mean it wasn't another joke was it?" Rachel's arms wrapped themselves protectively around her stomach.
Quinn looked at the ground and then moved slightly closer to Rachel. "Bible." Her voice shook as she answered in a whisper.
"Well then in that case. I just wanted to say..." Rachel trailed off unsure of what she was going to say despite the fact that she had played this exact scene over and over in her head since formulating the plan sometime last night.
"Hypothetically. I love you too."
Quinn stood dead still unsure if she had heard the girl correctly. "Bible?" She asked, seeking reassurance that this girl wasn't lying.
"Tanakh" Rachel replied.
The corner of Quinn's mouth quirked up into a smile as she heard the girl swear on her own holy text. "And if I said that this situation wasn't hypothetical?" she asked.
"Then my answer wouldn't change" Rachel confirmed
Quinn stepped forward closing the distance between the two of them until they were impossibly close. "I love you" Quinn whispered in Rachel's ear, winding her arms around the smaller girls waist.
"I love you too." Rachel replied as her lips were captured by Quinn's.
