Insanity

I stare out at her, in shock as she applies make up, staring straight at me with that secretive smile. That dangerous smirk that she gives me every time, all the time, constantly, trapped I stare back, shaking my head and praying she does nothing that could put my boys in danger.

My boys...

My poor boys.

They have no clue, no idea about the monster unleashed on them.

I slam my hand against the glass as she tilts her head to one side, smiling at me before she disappears. I know she is doing work for Linderman; what that work is I have no idea, but it can't be good. For us or whoever she's meeting.

"No!"

I begin to shake as she leaves, leaning against the cool, cold mirror before I turn around and take stock of where I am. Simply, I am still in my bedroom. But I am unable to step too far from the mirror, unable to even open the door. I trail beside it, gazing around; the whole room is backwards, strange and eerie. And here it's too quiet.

The door on the other side opens and I see him; D.L enters, glancing uneasily around the room.

"D.L!" I cry, but to no avail; he doesn't hear me, or see me...she has taken my place. He sits on the bed, head in his hands. I hear his words.

"What are you doing Nikki?"

For a brief second I thought he was talking to me, until I realised that to him, ishe/i was his Nikki, his girl. I slammed the window again, as I heard Micah calling up "Mom! Mom!"

"In here honey!" Crying, I pushed myself against the glass, watching as Micah bounded in.

"She's out Micah. Come on, I'll get you some lunch."
They disappeared and I cried after them, begging them to come back.

In here I can do nothing except sink to the floor and weep.

I am stuck; no where to go, and she has taken over my life.

Suddenly a thousand different thoughts are crowding into my head, fighting for space, a multitude of different voices, most prominent is hers...

My sister...

She had been so beautiful, so clever. I had changed her into something strange and evil and dangerous, I would be trapped here forever in this strange mirror room, without Micah and D.L...

Stop thinking about that. Think of something else...anything else...

A drink.

How much did I crave that sweet taste of alcohol as I lay there, staring blankly at the ceiling and trying to figure out a way I could escape this prison inside my own head. I was stuck, and I wanted a drink.

Everyone has their vices; drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, sex...

Mine was of the drink variety; an alcoholic; I had even been at an AA meeting when he found me and she...she...she...

NO!
Do not think about her...

I'm losing it...slowly and surely stuck here I am losing it I think of her with her lovely long hair and her sparkling eyes and the way she protected me and saved me and that's why I needed her back because it wasn't me that needed protecting anymore it was Micah it was all for Micah because I couldn't make money so I called myself Jessica to hide behind something whilst I did those dirty disgusting acts for men online and I made a monster I created a blonde monster that was hidden inside myself and...

The clip clop of shoes and suddenly I'm staring at her on a stairwell, chasing someone...

I'm losing my mind...she's taken it over...