DAY 1
Pokemon Go has just been released in a few countries. The final version has been released on iPhone and Android devices in Australia and New Zealand. The Professor has already helped hundreds of trainers begin their Pokemon Journeys. All the details we have discussed prior has been implemented and everything is going well. Release in North America is planned for a couple of days, with releases elsewhere in the world scheduled for the upcoming weeks. I believe this is our greatest idea yet. I look forward to see how this game unites all the people of the world.
DAY 7
It's been a week since the release of Pokemon Go. North America is currently the only other country to have the game released to them following the release in Australia and New Zealand. Many people have grown impatient about the lack of release in their countries and have altered settings on their Android devices to obtain a foreign version of the game. It's a good thing that the maps have already been decided for each country, otherwise these people will have just wasted their time. Just wait a bit longer please. The game will be out for you all eventually.
A lot of news regarding Pokemon Go has already circled the media. Despite the warnings provided, many people have injured themselves in their attempt to catch Pokemon. A few have died from what I've heard, but let's hope this will act as a warning to others.
DAY 21
Three weeks since release and Pokemon Go is available in most countries now. Many people are enjoying the game as it is meant to be played, however concerns have been brought up by the Professor. He introduces his assistants to Players when they reach Level 5. Spark of Team Instinct focuses research on Pokemon intuition and breeding, and are represented by the Legendary PoKemon Zapdos. Blanche of Team Mystic focuses research on Pokemon evolution and calm analysis, and are represented by the Legendary Pokemon Articuno. Candela of Team Valor focuses research on Pokemon training and true strength, and are represented by the Legendary Pokemon Moltres. The purpose of the players being introduced to these is so that they can join a team and begin training to fight gyms. All of the Team Leaders are really friendly with each other, even assisting each other with their research. The players, however...
Many players have begun arguments and fights over which team is superior. They claim their team is the best, while the other two are trash and... other inappropriate comments of which I shall not list have been made. Not every player is like this, however a huge majority is. I hope that peace will return to these teams soon.
DAY 36
The fights have become worse. Some players from each team got into a huge fight about which is better. The fight resulted in a large scale brawl between about thirty players. Five have been reported dead, with everyone else seriously injured. Reports claim the brawl began between two members of Team Mystic and Team Valor, with members of Team Instinct trying to calm them. When things became violent between the blue and red teams, the yellow team became furious and brawled too. Many players unaffiliated with the game, and many who played but cared little about the team battles tried to intervene, but this resulted in more injured. I'm beginning to think most players are misunderstanding the purpose of the teams. You're meant to be rivals, not enemies. So begin acting like them.
DAY 42
Many people have quit their jobs and dropped out of school to become full time Pokemon Trainers. I shouldn't be saying this, but they're a disgrace to all players and Pokemon fans. This is just an AR mobile game, not real life.
DAY 59
Almost two months since initial release and the game is release worldwide everywhere. Many people are taking this game too seriously. I've received angry letters from many complaining about the lack of features and certain Pokemon. Give us time. This game is not easy to program. We're having trouble keeping the servers up without causing riots.
DAY 64
Pokemon Go has become banned by many businesses. Initially, business owners thought this would be a great way to attract customers, and it was. Until the Team Wars became too violent. Innocent bystanders and people who genuinely want to enjoy the game are being assaulted just for trying to calm other players down. It's actually reached the point where many families and friends have become divided purely because of their choice in teams. I wonder how the leaders are holding up...
DAY 72
Blanche spoke to me earlier. He told me that he's leaving Team Mystic and going back home to continue his research. Candela and Spark are doing the same. He mentioned that the pressure of all of the players who refuse to listen is building up. With too many players who have lost sight of their team's original purpose, he feels like the teams cannot stand much longer.
DAY 76
The Teams option has been removed from the game and many players are extremely agitated. While many were happy that it is now gone, others are... not taking the news well. The Gyms have all been closed so that we can work a new way to handle these with the lack of teams now, and many are annoyed over that. Thousands of players blame the other teams about the option being removed. Idiots. You're all to blame. This wouldn't have had to happen if you would have just acted nice to each other. Who cares about teams? You should have joined the one that best suits you and left it to that.
DAY 97
The total death toll has amounted to little over 4 million. Riots are occurring. Many people have been trampled by those trying to catch rare Pokemon. Other have been killed purely because of what Team they had previously joined. The servers were down for a few hours the other day, and many turned violent. All we tried to do was provide an update. To be honest, I shudder to think of what may happen if we add Legendaries in.
DAY 124
I've been receiving death threats. People are angry that no new Pokemon have been added. People area still angry about the teams being disbanded. Some are angry about the lack of updates. What the hell, people? When we close the servers to incorporate each update, you all riot about the servers being down. WE EVEN PROVIDE ANNOUNCEMENTS! WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?
The following messages are a recorded conversation between Professor Willow and a Nintendo creator called 'M'.
DAY 132
WILLOW: "It's been four and a half months since we released Pokemon Go and things are not looking good.
M: "I know. I thought it would be a good idea to give the world what it wanted, but I now know that was a mistake."
*footsteps*
M: "Riots. Injuries. Deaths. Murders. The world was not ready for this game."
WILLOW: "I received word from Blanche the other day. He said everything is better where he and the others are."
M: "Understandable. Things are better over there."
WILLOW: "We can only hope things get better."
DAY 146
M: "Professor Willow. I'm glad you could make it."
WILLOW: "I'm glad we can speak. No doubt this is about what happened yesterday."
M: "Indeed. Former members of Team Valor broke into the Niantic Headquarters and injured many employees. To make matters worse former Team Mystic members broke into the headquarters, intending to the the same thing."
WILLOW: "I received word that former Team Instinct members are hiding in the shadows. This may be a cause for concern."
M: "Many people are enjoying the game as it is meant to be enjoyed, but these extremists are taking things too far. I'm worried that we may have to discontinue the project."
WILLOW: "Same here. Perhaps we should offer one final warning to the players before hand though."
DAY 178
WILLOW: "Miyamoto-san. The economy is beginning to collapse. Millions are homeless. Thousands more are dead. I fear it is time."
M: "Yes, I agree. We gave them one final warning. It took one more month to make things go from bad to worse."
WILLOW: "Does that mean...?"
M: "Yes. We will cancel the project. The world will never be ready."
*silence follows for about ten seconds.*
WILLOW: "I'll prepare the announcement then.
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DAY 180
A message was displayed on all electronic devices at roughly 12PM GMT. Displayed on the screen was Professor Willow.
"Greetings, Pokemon Trainers. As you may know already, I am Professor Willow, and I am the Professor who helps out players in their Pokemon Go journey.
"Over the past six months, I have been watching you all closely as you partake in your Pokemon Go experience. But I now have some bad news for you all.
"My job here was to act as an observer. I was assigned to observe how the people of this world reacted when faced with Pokemon. This was because of a Project known as Project Go.
"Project Go was simple. We'd release an AR mobile Pokemon game titled 'Pokemon Go'. This would be used to detect how people of this world would react to Pokemon. The project started as a success. The end goal would be that in a few years, should the project go well, Pokemon would be introduced to this planet. You see, I am actually a representative from the Pokemon World.
"When we saw the success of Pokemon in this world, we considered bringing some over here to allow you all the same experience we had, although a test was in order. This test... you have failed.
"Honestly, I am disgusted by everyone's reactions. You all have disgusted us so much, that my assistants quit only a couple of months into the test. They felt responsible for how you all reacted.
"Let me explain. The purpose of the Teams was for you all to choose how you'd prefer to raise your Pokemon. That's it. Yes, you'd battle each other at gyms and eventually other places and events, however this would be done as rivals. You could even be rivals with those on your own team. Whether these would be friendly rivalries or not was your choice. Many of you, however, decided it would be better if you became enemies. You turned things violent purely because you thought your team was superior. You all had the same goals, but took different ways to get there. Yet many of you felt the need to insult and attack those who were on opposing teams for the simple reason of that it was not your team.
"With this Project confirmed a failure, I have no choice but to leave. I will be returning back to the Pokemon World with all of the Pokemon, and we will never return to this planet. You people disgust me. Farewell."
Then, once the Professor disappeared from every screen, every copy of Pokemon Go, legit or not, was instantly removed from everyone's devices. Every version was also removed from every digital shop. Pokemon Go would never return. No Pokemon game which would be similar would ever return. Many players blamed themselves over how they reacted, knowing that they were the reason that this happened. Pokemon would never be real in their world because they proved that they would never be ready for it.
Players needed to fill this void left in their hearts. Some felt like they needed to commit suicide, while others considered making a difference in the world, when suddenly... the screens turned back on.
To everyone's amazement, who appeared on the screen was Gabe Newell, director of Valve.
"Attention everyone. I know the recent news of Pokemon Go must come as a shock to you all. It shocked me, as well. I know that many of you will be feeling empty now with this, which is why I've decided to release something new to help you all out. I'm sure many of you will be excited for this so without further delay I would like to announce... The Pokemon Trainer hat DLC for Team Fortress 2!"
Then everyone played Team Fortress 2 with the new Pokemon DLC hat. The End.
So this was just a little joke story I wrote about Pokemon Go. Despite being a joke, there is a meaning to it. All of the fighting over teams is pointless. Mystic, Valor, Instinct. Join whichever one you want. Just don't hate other teams for no good reason. Enjoy the game as it is meant to be enjoyed: by catching them all!
And remember: the opposing teams are our rivals, not our enemies.