" I'm Carth, one of the Republic soldiers from the Endar Spire, I was with you in the escape pod, do you remember?"
Yes, I remember, I would never forget, never forget any of it and I'll never forget you, flyboy, she thought with a smile. The love of my life. I could never forget. The memories are always with me because, because that's all I have now, it's all I have left. I remember when you first started flirting with me too…Her mind became lost in the memories.
"I like the first part of that, I'm a bit more partial to the 'Most Handsome Pilot in the Galaxy' ah, what do you think?"
"hehehe, A little bit touchy are we?"
"Is there something else you'd prefer I called you?"
"I'm all ears beautiful"
"Don't get yourself in a twist over it gorgeous, I didn't mean anything by it"
"OH FOR CRYING OUT… fine, if it'll make you feel better, you call me something, go 'head, come on, I can take it"
"Oh, ouch, I think you hurt my man feelings with that one"
"HAIRLESS WOOKIE? Alright sister, just, just, just calm down before your head explodes"
"Well I guess I should be at least a little pleased that I haven't lost my touch"
"And I guess Gorgeous will just have to do until then, won't it?"
"heh, Can't say I've ever met a woman quite like you before, you're really something"
"At any rate I wasn't ogling at you, I've just been … admiring you"
"Because you're an impressive and beautiful woman and I'd like to make things right between us"
"I don't know why but I think some terrible fate is waiting for you. I think the Jedi Council knows it too. And I don't want that to come to pass"
I didn't want it either but you can't change destiny. Thank you for everything, thank you for trying. And please… forgive me. I never wanted any of this. If I had a choice I'd be on some remote planet living out my life with you…but that was not in the stars for me, for us. I'm sorry.
"If uh, if I'm going to find some purpose beyond taking revenge on Saul, then, it's going to have to be in protecting YOU… let me protect you, from yourself, from the Sith, YOU HAVE TO LET ME TRY"
You can try, but there's no chance of success. The odds are too great, even for us – Saviors of the Galaxy. Even if you could save me from myself, from the Sith – there is still my destiny and no one can save me from that. Why would you even try?
"Because I finally have the chance to do it right"
"You are an extraordinary woman, you make me think that, maybe I might have some purpose beyond revenge"
"I can't hate you, I tried. I wanted to hold you responsible for all the things you've done, for, for my wife, for Telos, … for Dustil, … but I can't"
"I got the revenge I always wanted when Saul died, but it hasn't brought me the peace that I thought it would"
There is only peace. You just weren't looking for it, were you? I have been looking, and even I have trouble finding it at times. Times like these, when I think of the past, when I think of you. Peace seems like a distant oceanic wave from Manaan that will always be just out of my reach … like you.
"All I can think of now, is the promise that I made to protect you from what's going to come. It's given me a reason to look past simple revenge"
"You have this HUGE destiny waiting for you and I just fear that if you're alone it could swallow you whole"
Like a tsunami
"Is there room in there for me? Will you let me help you?"
"Let me protect you"
"You gave me a future … I want to give you a future too, with me"
"I think I could love you, if you give me the chance"
"Let's let's face the future together"
"I … I love you"
I think of that wave… Even when it seems that very wave is coming towards me, to rest upon the shore with me, I remain unsure. Unsure of my choices. I look out and see another wave, so much like the first. Is that my wave, still out of reach, or simply another? Has mine already come ashore, retreating back after loosing so much of it's strength? Will it just bubble back into the sand in defeat or will it be eager to gather up what remains and try again? Does that wave, so far out of reach, teasing, beckoning, shout to me that I haven't found true peace? Is my wave still out there? Has it come ashore or is it waiting, waiting for …
"I love you, you know that right? I love you, even now, even after, after, after all you've done, I LOVE YOU, like I haven't loved anyone or anything since my wife died and I didn't EVEN THINK that was possible"
"This is all the time we have, it should all be over soon, There's no other place I'd rather be than here"
"I love you, I can't wait until all this is over with"
It would never be over with though, would it? Once one trial was over, another just began again, like an oceanic wave. That was life, that was the lesson that 30 odd years had taught. Circumstances change but the root of it all was still the same. Even love could not overcome destiny.
A ripple in the force snapped her out of her thoughts, out of her memories. The children were in danger. She had to act.
Quickly pushing aside all the painful and ironically, the happiest memories of her past, she grabbed her lightsabers, some medpacs and headed out the door, before even the lingering warmth of the memories left her heart.
The children. They were close, but in great danger.
Her heart dropped when she saw the threat. A mother Rancor was very ticked that some human children had decided to play with her youngling. There would be no reasoning with her, Revan quickly surmised. As there would have been none either, if the roles were reversed. She unstrapped a grenade from her belt and threw it near enough to distract the mother, while still keeping the children safe. The distraction worked, and she took every opportunity to close the distance between herself and the Mother. She pulled out both sabers, although using just one had always been her preference.
She slashed with one while protecting herself from the large claws with the other. It was a short battle, considering the situation, and Revan realized the mother Rancor must have been at the end of her child-bearing years. Just as she made the devastating blow that would render the mother to her final resting place, a claw slashed through the air, landing somewhere between Revan's lower torso and her, too late, block. She screamed out more in surprise than pain but the pain came quickly after and she found herself down on all fours. The children were rushing up to her and she tried to regain some composure.
"Take me back to the Jajak, I'll be fine, I just need some rest, don't worry."