Chapter 1- An unforgettable compromise

Tobi was sitting on a ledge above the Akatsuki cave. He casually scratched his back. That damn itch seemed to have been there forever, but he could never seem to get the scratch to penetrate through his jumpsuit. This, by the way was one of the reasons why Tobi was staying in that same spot for such a long time.

Just then two men in black with red clouded cloaks came out of the nearby forest. They followed a trail toward the mouth of the cave. Tobi waited for them to reach the end of the path when he jumped down from his ledge and landed directly in front of them. One of them had a grayish-blue complexion and spiky stiff looking hair, and held a creepy resemblance to an ET on crack that had been feeding on fish flakes his whole life. "TOBI! For the last time, GO HOME" (the gray skinned man quietly sings to himself 'ET go Ho-o-ome'), the other man with black hair and two lines across his face was the one talking to Tobi.

Tobi crouched "aww….. But Tobi is a good boy, he is, he is" he repeated several times to hopefully get the men's approval. The fish looking man squinted "God Dammit Tobi! Get the hell away and leave us the fuck alone you swirly faced freak!" The dark haired man patted the fish man on the shoulder and spoke quietly close into his ear "Watch what you say dear, you're a freak too you know" The fish man gave the Uchiha a puppy dog eyed stare "But you still love me right sweetie?" The Uchiha put his arm around the fish mans waist and whispered "of course, forever----"

Tobi leaned forward in a way to mean confusion "Wha?...um ok, look guys I'm offering a hefty trade. I'll give you……" Tobi put his hand into his front pocket and fumbled around inside for a bit. "oooook. Well, let's see. I have 3 paper clips and some black lint……heh, how's that for a trade eh boys?" Tobi gave an entrepreneur-like tone. The fish man sniffed "pah! I got my coat dry cleaned yesterday I have enough lint to fill up Australia…….wait…how the hell did I know about that place? " The Uchiha tugged on the fish mans sleeve "We should be going now the leader is waiting, there's no use in getting this guy some professional help. You might as well ignore him for now" The two men directed their attention toward the mouth of the cave and walked in while holding hands. Tobi leaned forward toward the opening and seemed even more confused than usual. Just then the door slammed shut on his face.

Record-Tape 01- ITACHI

Itachi: so, what exactly am I here for anyway?

Ren: Participating in a world transforming experiment.

Itachi: which is?

Ren: an interview about your life, the fans will love it….believe me

Itachi: sigh somehow I don't believe that

Ren: well, why not?

Itachi: ……….because I hate fans, they should all go fuck themselves.

Ren: cough um alright……well let's get started with the interview, shall we. Ok first question, where are the two lines across your face from, or what do they symbolize?

Itachi: Your mom……

Ren: …… seriously now, Itachi work with me. We need to please the fans

Itachi: What's the significance on knowing why I have lines on my face? ...retard

Ren: Look you frak face! This is my job, the least you can do is cooperate. It's not like I can pull the answers out of my ass!

Itachi: oh, I'm sure if you tried it would work……..

Ren: you know what? I can't see why everyone loves you so much. You torture your dear bother and kill off every Uchiha for your own selfish reasons!

Itachi: yawn….. That was a really bad comeback. Can I leave now? I have a 'date' with my hubbie and I promised I'd be there before 5 pm. walks out of the room

Ren: ………damn frak face

-End-