I'm coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all

Ever since I came back from military school it felt like a was finally free. I was free from being that dork that people would pick on. I felt like I was free to do all the things that the old puny me couldn't. It was refreshing and I felt like I could finally have what I wanted most her. It was all I wanted was a chance and it seemed like finally I could have it. It was the school dance and she was as beautiful as ever. I got the courage to finally ask her and she agreed. It was like I was dreaming, the girl I've been in love with forever finally was seeing me in a different light.

It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this?
It was only a kiss
It was only a kiss

Then it turned into a nightmare. He showed up. I never understood why Castiel came to the dance it never seemed like it was his type of thing. But he was there and he wanted something or someone. When he saw her he got the most wicked grin on his face. He came up and asked for a dance. The thing I loved about Candy was that she was also so sweet and kind but at the moment I wish she said no. Because not long after that dance I swathe unimaginable.

Now I'm falling asleep
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag

Castiel kissed her. He took her first kiss right there in the middle of the dance floor. I couldn't believe it. I thought for once it was my turn to get what I wanted but it didn't seem so. I left not long after that but I wish I waited longer. Because as I walked outside I saw them. They were right next to his car. Castiel was smoking and my innocent Candy seemed to be trying it herself. I shook my head and started home. This was just my mind playing tricks on me, I needed some sleep.

Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head

As I lay down in my bed I got a horrible feeling in my stomach. All I could think about is that guy with her. He was corrupting the sweet girl that I loved, the girl I changed for. I kept turning but my head just kept replaying seeing them together at the dance and by his car. My mind started going crazy. I thought of them as a couple. I thought of them getting married. I thought they do that.

But she's touching his chest now
He takes off her dress now
Let me go

All I can think of is that he finally took her home and it not just ending at the doorway. I thought horrible things that they would do with each other. How she would be happy with him and let any chance that we had together go just for the bad boy that she thought she could turn good.

And I just can't look its killing me
And taking control

Every time I closed my eyes I see them together. I try to look away but it's just taking over me. All I can see and think of is him with her. How he got the girl that I loved and that I was too scared to even try and fight back.

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis

I was jealousy. There I finally said it. I admit that I am jealous. Jealous that Castiel got to be with her while I was away. Jealous that no matter how hard I try I can't beat him. I went away for a long time, changed who I was just to be man enough for but that still doesn't seem to even come close to him.

But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
'Cause I'm Mr Brightside

I guess it just what destiny has in store for me though. She'll always see me as that little loser that didn't know how to show his feelings. I'll always be Ken in her eyes. No matter how hard to try and make her see that I am no longer the same dork. Maybe I'm the one that needs to open up my eyes. I mean at least now she see me as a friend, that's better than before. Right?