I'm surprised no one's done this. Nothing suits Light like a suit, really. I also don't own Death Note or How I Met Your mother. I really wish I did. Then my life would be complete.
Light Yagami whistled a happy song while hanging up his fresh laundry. He began hanging his tan suit, his favorite that he always wore with a handsome red tie. Once that was hung, he turned to grab the next suit.
"Yagami-kun, hurry up. We need to go basck and monitor the suspects." L complained from the other side of the door.
"Shut up, L. You don't understand fashion." Light scoffed, "All you ever wear are those jeans and that distasteful white shirt… It's disgusting."
"Light, I find solving cases more important than choosing what to wear every day. Besides, it's not like I don't shower!" L said in his usual dull tone.
"Y' know what? Judt stalk those people by yourself, I don't care about you anymore." Light snapped.
"Uhh… Okay,Light. But this has made me suspect you more…So pick one. Your innocence, or your suits." L told the brunette.
Light paused.
Suddenly, he found himself running out of the task force building, L exiting before him with an annoyed expression, and strange music playing.
"I know what you're thinking, 'What chips was Light eating? That L is smoking hot!"' Light sang, imitating L's fangirls. "Yes, I coulda helped 'im, but no, it's not a failure 'cause there's one thing he is not! 'Innocence' would be just fine, but I'd rather be dressed to the nines!" He sang, as Teru Mikami lifted him by the feet so he could stand on his father's police car. "It's a truth you can't refute! Nothin' suits me like a suit!"Light belted, Mikami looking up at him in awe with questionable glitter polluting the air surrounding him. The glitter only multiplied when Light looked down to the attorney.
"Imagine a world where all the boys and girls are impeccably well dressed!" Light sand, and Mikami's eyes glowed and his glitter danced as he pictured it. Light's arm flailed back and forth, pointing at multiple citizens. "That delivery guy in the jacket and tie, that puppy in a double breast!" The two killers grinned as they watched a suit appear on the puppy. Light's magic finger continued to pont. "That creepy guy with the dread locks, That blonde with the chocolate!" Mello and his mafia gang began to pull out their guns, but were shocked when they saw they were suddenly in suits.
"WHERE IS MY LEATHER?" Mello screamed. Light wasn't there to answer. His magic finger had moved itself towards Hal Lidner. "That lady cop who's kinda cute!"
"I'm already in a suit…" She said.
"NOTHING SUITS TEM LIKE A SUIT!" Light smiled, and jumped off the car. He began skipping down the street. "In tan or maybe black, check out this perfect rack!" He jumped onto a rack of suits Mogi was delivering. "I want to give them a squeeze!" He cooed, petting the fabric goodness. Mogi jerked the cart forwards, knocking Light off. Light marched down the sidewalk, but was interrupted by Near.
"Oh really? Then answer these questions if you please…" Near sang apathetically, twirling his hair.
"What would you do if you had to choose between your suits and a pot of gold?" Roger sang in a voice so terribly that Linda burst into tears and eighteen buildings exploded.
"Suits." Mello was next to question.
"What would you say if you gave your suits away in return you'd never grow old?"
"Suits." Matt jumped in front of Light.
What would you pick, one million chicks, or a single three piece suit?"
"The suit." Misa skipped alongside Light, and he paused to listen.
"What if world peace were within your reach-"
"Ababababa. I'm gonna stop you right there. It's suits. C'mon, Misa. Get your head outta your ass." Misa threw herself to the sidewalk in tears.
"TWO! THREE! FOUR!" Mikami cued.
"Girls will go and girls will come but there's just one absolute! Every bro on the go needs to know-"
"What the hell's he saying?" Mello asked his gang and they shrugged as Light skipped past, Mafia gangs, gamers, cops, detectives, and orphans in tow.
"That there's no accepted substitute!" The crowd sang.
"I'm sorry suits, let's make amends! My Sunday best are my best friends! Send casual Friday down the laundry chute!" Light sang, waving to the sky.
"'Cause nothing suits the undisputed oft-saluted suitor like a…" They sang in a kick-line.
"Wait for it…" Light said as the crowd leaned closer in suspense.
"Suit!" He sang, holding the note out longer than any other.
"Then again, L is pretty hot." Light shrugged, chasing the insomniac down the street and L died a bit inside.